


More Than a Feeling

by wantAwinchester



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Apocalypse, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Ancient Technology, Angst, Bisexual Dean Winchester, Bounty Hunter Dean, Dean Winchester Angst, Demons, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hunters & Hunting, Hurt Sam Winchester, Hurt/Comfort, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Men of Letters Bunker, Non-Consensual Oral Sex, Oral Sex, Psychic Sam, Rape, Rape Aftermath, Rape Recovery, Science Fiction & Fantasy, gift of virginity, techno-mage Sam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-30
Updated: 2014-12-04
Packaged: 2018-02-27 14:39:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 31
Words: 114,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2696636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wantAwinchester/pseuds/wantAwinchester
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's now two hundred years after Sam Winchester releases Lucifer from his cage igniting the Demon Wars and the world has been irrevocably changed.  Water is scarce and most sources are contaminated.  There are three ruling bodies in control of the US.  The Federation of Bounty Hunters, The Techno-mage Priories and the College of Bards.  Books are scarce and all knowledge is controlled by the ruling bodies. The remaining population lives in small cities and towns that are settled around a deep well.  The lands in between are known as The Blasted Lands and demons roam freely.  The bounty hunters try to keep the demon population in control but they can't stop them from returning once dispatched to hell.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Demons

**Author's Note:**

> An AU fantasy that combines several of my favorite fantasy themes and combines them with some of the Supernatural canon. The work is complete but I am posting it in three installments as my beta reader works to refine my words and eliminate my errors. She is invaluable and provides excellent guidance when I run into a plot dilemma. This started as Dean's story but the characters didn't like that and it became Brother Samuel's story. He turned out to be a most amazing man and I was hard to stop writing his story. Comment if you like what read. I do have an idea for a sequel. I hope you enjoy reading Brother Sam's story as much as I did writing it. There are 30 chapters and an epilogue. xo

Brother Samuel stopped in the dusty road, eyes scanning the desolate and empty landscape, the blasted lands, he was traveling trying to isolate the sounds of the battle he could just barely hear in order to determine which direction he should head. He quieted his pony and used his will to send his consciousness out over the area searching for anything his eyes couldn’t see. There! He locked onto the coordinates and returned to his body before activating the concealment device on the pony and cart and heading off toward the conflict.

“Four to one, really? That’s all you mother-fuckers have? Come on then pussies, show me what you’ve got!” Dean Winchester was pissed; four kobold demons had gotten the jump on him and had him cornered against the wall of some relic leaving him very little room to maneuver. The fuckers weren’t even on his list so he was wasting his time and risking injury for little to no compensation. He was barely keeping them at bay with his twin katanas and was grateful these lessor demons didn’t possess magic since they hadn’t given him any time to activate any of his anti-magic devices. Distracted by three of them he didn’t see the fourth one come from the left side, the demon’s blade cut deeply into his thigh and he prayed to a god he didn’t believe in any more that it didn’t hit an artery.

Brother Samuel crested a small rise just in time to see the demon get inside the twirling katanas and cut the man fighting for his life. Hoping the knife wasn’t poisoned and didn’t hit anything vital, he threw off his dun colored cloak and joined the fight, his quarterstaff immediately taking out two of the demon spawn before working to back a third one away from the man in black and red leather.

‘What the fuck?’ Dean thought as the golden giant joined the fight. He hoped to hell the guy was fighting on his side because he was in no shape to take on the giant and so he focused on the remaining demon, and taking advantage of the distraction the giant provided he beheaded him easily with the scissors action of the dual blades. The golden giant was moving so fast Dean couldn’t keep up with his actions, but it appeared he had the situation with the fourth demon under control so he cleaned and sheathed Honor and Courage before assessing the wound on his leg.

Once he’d killed the last demon, Brother Samuel piled the carcasses together and turned to evaluate the other man’s injuries. His thigh was still bleeding profusely and he appeared to be going into shock. He was conflicted, the man was a bounty hunter and he was a techno-mage. The bounty for techno-mages was high, even if they weren’t on a hunter’s list but he was injured and despite what the people in the cities thought, the techno-mages weren’t interested in death and destruction. Their sworn mission was to uncover the mysteries of the ancients in order to preserve the peace in the new world.

“Shit!” Dean sat down before he fell, “kobold demons and now a fucking techno-mage. What did I do to deserve this crap today? Look mage,” he spat the name out like it was poison, “I get that you saved my ass, so it’s a freebie this time, go, I won’t follow. Just don’t come near me….” The stories told in the cities about a techno-mage’s abilities included their ability to take control of your body if they made contact. “I won’t be your fucking puppet.”  
The giant laughed, “Not everything you hear about us is true and you’re going nowhere with that wound,” the mage lay his quarterstaff at his feet and crouched down so that his eyes were level with the hunter’s. Brother Samuel’s eyes swept over the almost perfect face of the injured hunter, gasping at the green eyes and sensuous mouth, “I can help you.”

The hunter knew he was right, he wasn’t going anywhere without help, he’d lost too much blood and the cut was too deep. ‘Fuck me,’ he thought as he tried to convince himself that accepting help from the enemy in order to live to fight another day was the better part of valor. He looked over the mage squatting in front of him, his face open, his hands held out palms up in a gesture of good will. Well hand, his left arm was cybernetic and Dean wasn’t sure that qualified as an actual body part. He met the mage’s eyes and sensed nothing but good intent. “Obviously I’m in no position to bargain, but I need you to swear on whatever it is you guys swear on that you will treat me according to the Federation’s Prisoner of War accords and that any ransom you demand will be reasonable.”

“Look hunter, I’m not taking you prisoner, but I swear by Jobs Gates that I won’t violate the accords and ransom you fairly,” Brother Samuel drew a sigil in the air “i” and it flared green sealing the oath. “Your turn, swear on your blades that you will not harm any of the brothers and sisters at the Priory of Scion during your recovery and that once you’re healed you will not hunt myself or any of my brethren for a fortnight.” The mage waited, his arms crossed over his chest as the hunter considered the vow while continuing to bleed, “Soon hunter, you don’t have much blood left.”

“Fine, fine. You know what the vow entails?” The mage nodded assent and the hunter drew his blades and held them crossed in front of his face, “I swear on Honor and Courage to not harm the brothers and sisters of the Priory of Scion during my treatment and recovery and will not hunt them for a fortnight after I’ve left the grounds.” Dean used Honor, the right hand blade to score the palm of his left hand and held Courage out to the mage who scored his right palm with the blade. The men then clasped hands and Dean finished the vow, “I will uphold this vow as long as the blood runs in both our veins or I will forfeit my life. Do you accept this vow in brotherhood?”

“In brotherhood,” the mage stepped forward and began to bind the hunter’s wound while the hunter cleaned and sheathed his blades. Brother Samuel studied the dressing and repressed the urge to trickle some energy into the dressing to make it tighter, he’d wait until the hunter passed out to reinforce the dressing with his will.

“What about the scum? We just gonna to leave them here to rot?” Dean indicated the kobolds with a jerk of his head.

“You want the heads for your collection? I’m sending them back to hell,” the mage drew a wicked looking blade from his boot and walked toward the demon carcasses ready to behead them for the hunter, “you’re not going to be in any shape to hunt for a while, this’ll bring you something even if they are small scale scum.” 

Dean, surprised at how much the mage knew of hunter business, shook his head, “no, not going to be able to turn them in before they rot to nothing, leave it.” The mage was huge, he had at least 4 inches on Dean barefoot and he was well muscled, the fact that he was shirtless hadn’t hurt the truce negotiation, even if he was a techno-mage cyborg. If you looked past the cybernetic arm the guy was well built. He’d heard that there were certain mages that could send demons back to hell without a rite of exorcism but had never seen it, hell, he’d never seen a mage alive before this, so he watched with equal amounts of curiosity, appreciation and dread.

After drawing a circle around the carcasses with his staff, Brother Samuel stood to one side and held his left arm out toward the circle. He closed his eyes and focused his energy inward while opening the door to his will, once the energy combined with his will he projected a trickle of will outward and it flared around the circle, flowing inward and covering the demons with a pulsing blue light. He held the energy steady as his will built. Once it reached maximum volume, he released it along the energy tie and immediately cut both. The blue light flared, almost blinding Dean, and winked out of sight taking the demons with it.

It had taken a great deal of his energy and will to dispatch the demons and Brother Samuel was sweating profusely, breathing hard and had a nose bleed. He turned back to the hunter, wiped the blood away and shrugged. “Let’s get you back to my cart I’m still a day out from the Priory, but I was on a supply run and have medications that will make you more comfortable. You’ll need fluids and rest. I’ve got plenty of water and food as well. I’m Brother Samuel, Sam if you prefer. Do you have a name other than hunter?” Sam picked up his quarterstaff and then helped the injured man to his feet, using his left side and arm to support him. He didn’t miss the shiver of revulsion that passed through the smaller man when his skin made contact with his cybernetic arm, “It won’t bite…..unless you ask nicely.” 

“Thanks…I think. I’m Dean, Dean Winchester, hunter. I’ve never…..I mean I’ve seen…..I don’t know any techno-mages.” Dean leaned heavily on the other man, unable to put any weight on his right leg. He smiled up at Sam hoping he hadn’t offended him too badly; he was putting his life in the hands of this magical cyborg after all. The grin that met his was open, friendly and dimpled; he let out the breath he didn’t know he was holding and concentrated on staying upright.

It was twilight by the time they reached the Priory’s halfway house and Sam had had to trickle energy into the pony to give a little extra speed and strength to compensate for the added weight of the now unconscious hunter they were hauling in order to make it before full dark. Sam started a fire; it got cold at night in the blasted lands they were crossing. Rather than using any more stored energy he did it the traditional way and went out to rub down and feed the pony before bringing the hunter into the square stone hut. He then activated the concealment device and got to work on the man’s wound hoping he’d finish cleaning and suturing it before he awoke, he didn’t have enough energy left to put him out and boost the healing powder he would sprinkle into the open wound. He undressed the hunter and carefully cleaned the wound while openly admiring his patient’s form as he worked. The man was broad shouldered, narrow waisted and fit, then there were those green eyes, the freckles across his nose and cheeks and the short dark blonde hair. There was a lot about Dean Winchester that deserved admiration. Once he’d finished dressing the wound he prepared the stew that made up his travel rations and opened one of the bottles of mead he’d used for trade in the city, glad he’d had some leftover, and settled back against the wall to wait for the hunter, Dean, to wake up. They taught the novitiates a lot about hunters and how to avoid them, but anything else the brothers knew about hunters was second hand gossip. Sam wondered, not for the first time that day, whether or not the hunter community tolerated homosexuality among its rank and file.


	2. Magic

Something smelled good and he was in pain, were Dean’s first thoughts as his mind swam back to consciousness. He lay on the cot quietly, without opening his eyes, struggling to remember exactly what had happened and where he was. The last thing he remembered was the giant techno-mage wrapping his cyber-arm around him. He then ran through an inventory of his body, a systems check of sorts, he had to piss, he was hungry and he hurt. Situation normal he thought and moved to sit up. The stitches in his upper thigh, OK groin, pulled causing him to cry out, “Son of a bitch!” He fell back on the cot breathing through the pain. “What the hell did you do to me?”

“Easy, Dean,” the mage was at his side, one hand on his forehead, the other on his chest encouraging him to stay still. “The wound was deep, you’re lucky it didn’t hit the femoral artery. I had to use several layers of sutures to close it properly. You’ll have full use of your leg once it heals….”

“Full use? Was there any question? I better have full use you, you…. techno-geek!” Dean was struggling to sit up again, but Sam easily held him down. He watched the mage’s eyes darken at his outburst and instantly felt petty but wasn’t about to apologize to the half-man no matter how good looking he was.

Sam sighed and removed his left arm from Dean’s chest, “I won’t stop you if you want to get up, but I did good work and your movements are threatening to undo it all. You’re going to have to trust me, but I can’t make you. Infection is your biggest threat now. You haven’t developed a fever yet and the penicillin healing powder I put in your wound should help keep any infection at bay.” 

“What’s this powder? Penicillin? Is it some kind of magic? I don’t want you to use magic on me.” Dean looked both concerned and slightly ashamed of his questions, but hell, magic!

“Not magic, medicine,” Sam turned away from his patient and checked on the stew. “The ancients used it to prevent infection and sepsis, it saves lives. We learned to make it and trade it in the cities, it’s also called antibiotic.”

Dean relaxed, he’d heard of antibiotic, he couldn’t afford it, but had heard of it, “thank you tech……Sam. I have to…..um….pi…..relieve myself, I think you’ll need to help me up.” He blushed at having to ask for help to piss, but his leg had made it clear it wasn’t going to put up with much fucking around. “Please?”

Sam had to help Dean sit at the bedside to take care of nature’s call, he’d argued a bit insisting he couldn’t piss sitting down, but after Sam had told him to either sit at the bedside or piss in bed, he complied grudgingly. He was then settled back in bed with a bowl of stew and his own bottle of mead, really good mead. Food and drink always made him happy. He even took the pain powder Sam had offered him. Halfway through his meal he realized he was dressed only in his underthings. “Um, Sam? Where are my leathers? Who undressed me? Are the pants a total loss? Honor and Courage?”

Sam suppressed a smile, “Your weapons are at the foot of the bed including the useless magic deflectors you carry…..I hope you didn’t pay too much for those. Your jacket is on the peg by the door, I’ve got your pants and have been looking at them to see if I could do the repair or if it was better to wait until we’re at the priory and Bert, the pony, undressed you.” Sam did smile at Dean as he said the last part.

Taking a long pull on his bottle of mead, Dean suppressed a shiver at the thought of Sam’s giant, yet surprisingly gentle hands undressing him and felt his cock stir, the guy was really good looking if you ignored the cyber-arm. Redirect, he thought, “This mead is excellent. You guys make it at the priory?”

“Yeah, we do. We’ve got dozens of hives and harvest the honey to use for mead as well as to use as a sweetener. We’re nearly self-sufficient but need to trade for things like flour since a mill takes up so much space and needs free-flowing water, which I’m sure you know isn’t easy to come by anymore and of course all the scrap metal we can get, especially copper.” Sam watched his patient digest the information as he finished his meal, he didn’t mind the questions and would rather people ask than make assumptions based on myths and misinformation. “Want more? There’s some stew left.”

“Um….yeah…..sure, you sure?” It was rare that people shared food and even rarer that you were offered seconds. “I don’t want to take advantage. Wait, it’s not……..conjured, is that the word, is it?”

“It’s stew, Dean. Vegetables, meat, seasoning, water,” Sam sighed, “we don’t ‘conjure’ anything, we don’t use magic, we use technology. It’s really old technology that’s been lost for centuries, but technology. That’s what we do, we research the things we read about in the ancient texts that have survived and we put those technologies into practice. Like the penicillin. That was found in a medical text at one of the other priories and through trial and error we were able to grow it, refine it and use it again.” Sam took the empty bowl and refilled it for Dean who smiled his thanks and took a couple of large bites before his next question.

“So the way you sent the kobolds back to hell… was that an old technology too?” Dean tried to act like he didn’t care one way or the other and concentrated on licking the gravy off his spoon rather than look at the other man.

With another sigh, Sam sat back against the wall and picked up his bottle, “No, no it wasn’t.”

“So magic, right? You did magic. I saw it.” Dean set his empty bowl on the floor next to the bed, “You’re magic.”

Sam pulled his cloak a little tighter around his shoulders, keeping his cyber-arm well covered knowing it bothered the other man to see it and rubbed his right hand over his face while searching for the right words to explain. “It’s not magic, exactly. It’s complicated….I don’t know my parents; I was left at the gates of the priory when I was six months old. I’d been involved in a fire and the burns on my left arm were so infected they were a threat to my life so they took it off between my elbow and shoulder, once it was gone my little body was able to heal the infection. I’ve had several different prostheses, artificial limbs, over the years and actually learned to get along pretty well without my left arm.” 

“Two years ago they asked me if I would like to be fitted with a cybernetic arm. They made it clear that once I was a cyborg I would never be welcome to live in a city again and that the priories would become my life, not just my orphanage. I don’t know any other life. I grew up studying the old languages and texts, I have no skills I could trade for in the cities unless I wanted to be a sex worker and probably wouldn’t have succeeded at that with one arm either.” Sam stopped to sip from his bottle and looked to see how the other man was reacting to his story. There was interest in the green eyes and he didn’t seem too uncomfortable, so Sam continued, “So I took my vows and had the three procedures required to fit me with my arm. There is a small risk of rejection with these procedures and the first six months were difficult. My body and the circuitry of the arm had to meld, to grow together in order for the cyber limb to work properly so I was tested endlessly to see how the integration was progressing. Once I’d passed the twelve month mark the integration was considered complete and a success, I then had to learn how to use an arm rather than a prosthesis.”

Dean was fascinated, even if he hadn’t addressed the magic part yet, he had no idea what it took to become a cyborg or what was sacrificed. He didn’t think Sam would have failed as a sex worker, false arm or not. He was pretty, ripped and a giant. Yeah, Dean thought, he’d have never gone hungry. “So, the cyber arm is technology? But you said…”

“Not finished. I had to start at the beginning to have it make sense,” Sam watched as Dean made himself a little more comfortable, again admiring his form, he shook his head and continued his tale, “Since then I’ve had dreams, dreams that tell me, show me things. The Master Magi at my priory believe that the integration process stimulated new areas of my brain and woke a previously dormant ability. One of my dreams showed me how to bind my will to the energy stored in my cyber arm and use that to amplify my will. I’ve never tried anything as complex as sending four demons to hell at one time before this. I’ve done one, I can….” He channeled a very small amount of the energy left in his arm, bound it to his will and moved Dean’s bowl to the sink, “move small things, warm myself when I’m cold, warm or cool a drink and I used it to make Bert move a little faster today as well.” He watched Dean’s face closely as he digested this new information. 

The silence started to grow uncomfortable before Dean was ready to speak again, “Do you….can you….have you….people, do you use that on people?” Dean’s brow was furrowed with concern as he tried to work through the things Sam was telling him. He was trying very hard to not jump to conclusions, which surprised him, but he was starting to like this strange man despite the whole techno-mage cyborg thing.

“No, it won’t work on anything more intelligent that Bert and that was a stretch but he wanted to get to the barn so he didn’t fight against me. Yes, I’ve tried on people. Once my ability was made apparent to the Master Magi they tested me on all kinds of creatures and items. It is most effective with things. Anything else with even the smallest brain and it’s a battle of my will over theirs and the energy expended isn’t usually worth the result.”

“Can any cyborg do this will thing?” Dean actually felt bad for the younger man. He’d have hated having people running all those tests on him and making him perform like a trained dog.

“No. That’s why I started at the very beginning. I have no idea who my parents were or what may have happened to me in the months leading up to being burned and abandoned. The working theory is that I was either born with the ability or something happened to me in my first six months to alter the way my brain functions. You need to rest, it will be a long day tomorrow even with pain medicine. You’ll be much more comfortable at the priory. We have a very nice infirmary.” Sam brought over another dose of the pain medicine and had Dean chase it down with the mead remaining in his bottle. “That combination should keep you comfortable tonight, but wake me if you need anything. I don’t want you ruining all my hard work.” He smiled down at his patient, his dimples popping out as he helped him lay down and straightened the blanket before turning to clean up from dinner and bank the fire for the night.

“Sam?”

“What do you need? There’s some water right here near the head of the bed.”

“Don’t need anything…..I….I just…..wanted to thank you,” the hunter looked troubled, “I’d have left me to bleed out rather than take the risk of helping, vow or no vow. So, thank you for that and for apparently giving up your bed for the night.”

Sam laughed, “You’re welcome. You’ll spend at least a couple of weeks with us at the priory. Hopefully you’ll understand us better afterward. Good night, Dean.”

“Night Sam.”


	3. Technology

They got an early start the next day so they could make the priory well before dark. After settling Dean in the cart and giving him some more pain medicine, a couple of the travel bars he carried and a water skin, Sam made a final check of the halfway house and activated the concealment device on the house.

“Ok, now that was magic, right? You made the house disappear! You can’t tell me you willed it away,” Dean was still having trouble believing that the techno-mages didn’t use magic, “and don’t tell me it’s the pain medicine, I haven’t had that much!”

Sam shrugged and offered a half smile, “Technology and I shouldn’t have shown it to you, I was careless. We’re on every hunter’s list permanently and in order to survive we’ve kept a few of our discoveries to ourselves, including the concealment device. If we left the halfway house visible whoever used next would possibly walk into an ambush and become a hunter’s bounty if they suspected it was used by techno-mages.” Dean knew he was right and felt a trickle of shame at that the thought that he’d have done exactly that if he had found a place like this. He’d have even hoped for a multiple bounty out of it. 

“I’ll explain how it works on the way, how much will it bother you if I go without my cloak today? I need to recharge the energy in my arm. I can wait to see if you fall asleep if it’ll be a problem.” Sam was sensitive to the hunter’s discomfort with, well the entire situation and didn’t want to make him feel any more vulnerable, but he really needed to let the solar cell recharge if he was going to be able to use his arm effectively.

Dean was still focused on the space where the small house had been standing and it took him a minute to process what he’d been asked. “Oh, yeah…..sure, no problem. Hey, where did it go?”

“Still there,” Sam walked over the house and knocked on the wall, “the device blurs the lines and blends it into the landscape. It’s an illusion. We have to get moving, ask anything you want and I’ll answer what I can within the limits of my vows.”

It was mid-afternoon when Sam stopped and woke Dean from a fitful sleep, “I’m sorry, I’m going to have blind fold you for the rest of the trip I can’t let you see the landmarks from this point on.”

‘Shit,’ thought Dean and said out loud, “I hate not seeing where I’m going, and…..well…. I might get sick. I’m not a good traveler.”

Sam shook his head, “I am really sorry, we don’t let anyone see the path from this point forward, it’s not just you, not just hunters. Although, I think you will be the first hunter we’ve ever had as a guest. We can’t risk it Dean, we’re too feared.”

“Maybe if you didn’t hide yourselves away in secret lairs people wouldn’t be so scared of you. It’s not like you guys are trying very hard to make friends.” Sam helped the injured man to the edge of cart so he could relieve himself, “you say to not believe everything I hear, but it’s hard not to when you never hear or see anything else.”

“You have a point,” Sam helped Dean back into the cart and tried to get him comfortable, “but we’ve all got a price on our heads, we barely make it out of the cities alive when we trade, and only do at all because the markets are neutral territory and hunting is banned. Still we need to stay masked and cloaked to keep a hunter from making a positive ID and following one of us back to a priory.”

“And of course there is a market for what you trade even if people don’t trust you,” Dean continued while Sam tied the blindfold. “Are you going to bind my hands too?”

“Do I have to? I’d rather not, you’re uncomfortable enough. Can I trust you to leave the blindfold in place?” The mage made sure that water was accessible before clicking his tongue to get the pony moving again.

Dean was sorry to lose sight of his companion. He hadn’t minded watching the shirtless mage throughout the day and had actually stopped being jarred by the sight of the cybernetic arm after a couple of hours. He’d always been partial to big guys and at six feet it was hard to find a guy who made him look small. He settled back in the cart and reconstructed the mage in his mind’s eye. He surprised himself when he chose to leave the image as a cyborg rather than replacing the cyber arm with a normal one. “What? I mean, yeah, you can trust me. I can’t afford to offend you any more than I already have. After all, my life is in your hands.”

Smiling at the hunter’s use of the plural Sam watched him as he tried to get more comfortable wishing he could give him something more for the pain. Techno-mages swore vows to their priory, but weren’t celibate and although Sam had had a couple of experimental affairs with both sexes, he found he wasn’t attracted to the mages he’d grown up with, they were too much like family. There was nothing to stop him from transferring to a different priory and plenty of mages did just that to try to find mates, but he was focused on his current research and the books a priory owned weren’t allowed off the grounds under any circumstance, they were too valuable to put at risk. He’d have to stay where he was if he wanted to finish translating the books that dealt with the influx of demons in the early 21st century and the resulting plagues, pestilence, war and death the demons brought with them. He was currently working on a diary that seemed to be a manual for tracking demons and other unusual creatures. He hoped if he could figure out what had triggered the infestation in the first place that they could reverse engineer a solution to rid the earth of their influence permanently.

‘It figures,’ Sam thought, ‘I finally meet someone I’m attracted to and he’s the last person I should be involved with, someone who is a threat to my entire way of life.’ He shook his head trying to dispel the disturbing thoughts and glanced at his passenger again. He couldn’t stop the smile that split his face at the sight of the full lips that were perfect for kissing and his dick stirred at the thought of the hunter using those lips on his various body parts. He nearly moaned aloud and cursed at himself for indulging in a futile, although pleasant, daydream. The guy was paid handsomely for the heads of techno-mages and was repulsed by the sight of his cybernetics. The small chance that he’d be attracted to another man, a techno-mage at that, made him think even a brief affair would be a non-starter. He was jerked back to reality as the hunter interrupted his thoughts.

“Sam? Um…..sorry….I think I’m gonna be sick,” the hunter, true to his word didn’t attempt to remove the blind fold but did feel around himself for the water skin. “Would you hand me the water…..please?” He felt a hand on his back and the water skin was placed in his hands.

“Here’s the water, let me find a bowl for you, just in case,” Sam dug through the bag with his travel supplies and found the pot he used for cooking, “Here,” he gently placed the pot near Dean’s left hand trying to keep from disturbing the dressing on his right side. “I’ve put a container on your left,” he gently guided Dean’s left hand to the pot. “We’ll rest for a couple of minutes – I can water Bert – and hopefully your stomach will settle a bit. I don’t have anything with me that will help.” 

The mage’s hand was still on his back rubbing it gently and Dean resisted the urge to lean into him and increase the contact. He nearly whined when Sam left to water the pony. At least as sick as he was feeling, his dick was behaving itself. He was pretty exposed and didn’t really want to embarrass himself in front of his gorgeous savior or show his hand just yet. He was fairly certain an affair with a hunter would be about the last thing Sam would ever consider even if he was attracted to men, and he knew it was the last thing he should be thinking.

“A little better?” the hand was back and resting gently on his neck, “I’ll try to keep the cart a little more stable from this point on. We can stop again if you need to, I just can’t take the blind fold off. I’d be disbarred and then caught sooner or later if I had to try to make it on my own. I can’t risk it, but I am sorry you’re so uncomfortable.”

Dean sighed, “I know and I get it. I’ve never been a good traveler and mostly go by foot. I’ll let you know if I need to stop again but at this point I’d like to just finish the trip.” 

“Let me tell you about life in the priory. It may help keep you distracted. We really don’t have much farther to travel,” Sam moved a couple of the sacks around to try to keep his patient stable before starting forward again. This time he willed the cart to stop rocking so much and reinforced it with some of the renewed energy in his arm and started up a running commentary about life behind the walls of a techno-mage enclave.


	4. Judgment

Brother Samuel’s steps echoed in the empty hallway as he made his way to the priory’s assembly hall. He had been summoned to appear before the Master Magi and the rest of the priory’s avowed brothers and sisters to account for his recent actions. Dean was being cared for to the best of the priory’s ability but the Magi felt that bringing a hunter onto the priory grounds, injured and blind folded or not, required a formal hearing in front of the community before any further decisions about Brother Samuel or the injured man were made. Sam had been sure that saving a man’s life would supersede any restrictions in place regarding the hunter community and felt certain he’d taken all the appropriate precautions to keep the priory’s location a secret; yet here he was getting ready to argue in front of the community to keep his place. He took a deep breath as he pushed through the double doors and presented himself for judgment.

“Brother Samuel, please step forward,” the second of the three Magi spoke, “you will tell your story and the circumstances that surrounded your decision to break the prohibition against bringing the attention of bounty hunters to the priory’s location. We will open the floor for questions and then will consider your punishment.”

Sam recounted the tale of finding the injured man fighting for his life to the assembly, trying to look each member in the eye as he spoke. He didn’t want to lose his place in the only home he ever known and yet felt he did the right thing for the greater good by rescuing Dean and not leaving him to die when intervention could save his life. He carefully outlined the thought process behind each of the decisions he made after joining the fight trying to emphasize one of the points Dean had made on their journey. If they always remained hidden behind the priory walls and masks, how was anyone ever going to be able to dismiss the myths and untruths that had been told about their order since its inception.

“So brothers, sisters and honored Magi, I acknowledge that while I may not have used the best judgment in bringing the injured hunter here to recover, I believe that we can turn this liability into an opportunity; an opportunity to show at least one outsider the truth behind our masks. My hope for our future is that we can overcome the prejudice and fear our isolative ways have fostered and allow us to spread the truth about technology and the wonders it can bring to a much wider audience. After all, wasn’t it written in the sacred texts that all information should be freely available in a world wide web? I feel that we are meant to be the spiders that will spin the web that binds the world together once again, no it’s more than a feeling, it’s a certainty. I sincerely apologize for any fear and confusion my actions may have wrought, but truly believe that those actions were influenced by Jobs Gates and we owe it to him and the larger world to act.” Sam bowed to the priory members and again to the Magi.

“Brother Samuel, we thank you for your candor. We will now open the floor to questions from the membership.” 

Once there were no more questions, Sam was dismissed from the assembly room and sent to his room to await the verdict. He decided that since there was a better than average chance he would be disbarred that he might as well visit Dean and see how he was doing. Hopefully he’d consider his a friendly face in the midst of a bunch of strangers.  
________________________________________________

Dean’s stitches itched and he was sick of lying around in bed, even if it was comfortable. The techno-geeks taking care of him weren’t nearly as social as Sam and they looked at him like he’d bite their heads off if he could. This was why people were afraid of the mages; they managed to make you feel disliked while at the same time making you feel like you were a bug under a glass. He couldn’t wait to get out of the priory, but also hoped he’d see Sam a few more times before they sent him packing. He leaned over and looked under his bed to assure himself again that Honor and Courage were still there and was startled by Sam’s voice.

“Hey, easy Dean! I told you I didn’t want you screwing up my work.” Sam smiled at the still pale hunter who at least had the good grace to blush slightly at being caught. “Are they treating you all right here?”

“Hi Sam,” Dean straightened himself in the bed wincing in pain as his stitches pulled. “Yeah, I guess so. They feed me, look at the stitches, listen to my heart beat with a really cool thingy, they let me listen and are always checking my forehead for signs of fever I guess. I’m kind of sick of being here though. I know they don’t trust me, not that I blame them, not sure I trust all of them, but well, they’re not like you.”

“Yeah they made that pretty evident today. I don’t know what they’re going to decide,” Sam pulled up a chair and gave Dean an overview of the assembly and the questions the membership had asked.

“So you really told them what I said about hiding away?” Dean would be sorry if Sam ended up losing his place here because he’d saved his life and thought the mages were being a bunch of stuck up assholes about the whole thing. “Do you think it would make a difference if I offered to swear off hunting any techno-mages ever again?” He looked down unable to meet Sam’s gaze.

“I honestly don’t know. There is definitely a premium put on tradition in the priories and it has kept us safe since their formation, but I’m no longer certain that’s the right thing to do,” he looked down at his feet, he wasn’t sorry he saved this man’s life, but he did wish he wasn’t so freaking good looking. It made the possibility of losing his place at the priory even more painful, it wasn’t like he could follow the hunter around like a lost puppy hoping for handouts once he was healed.

Without thinking, Dean reached out and touched the other man’s cybernetic arm, “Come on Sam, you said you were working on something pretty important. Would they just throw that away?” He looked down and realized his hand had been on cyber arm, “It’s warm, I didn’t think it would be warm. How is that even possible?” He moved his hand down the arm to the hand and still didn’t feel a change in temperature.

Suppressing a shiver at the touch, Sam smiled, “It’s cybernetic so it is a part of me just like the other one. I know it’s hard to understand and to be honest I’m not an expert but when I told you my body and the new part merged, they grew together, blood vessels, nerves, muscles, everything.”  
“It’s amazing. It was warm the other day when you helped me sit up on the journey, and I thought since we were out in the sun the metal had warmed due to the heat of the day.” Dean was still holding Sam’s hand and didn’t really want to let go. He turned it palm up and noticed a faint tracing of lines that looked like the lines on his own palm, “How did….. What…..why…..this seems impossible. Was this in the books?”

“Yes and no,” Sam rested his hand gently in Dean’s and smiled when the hunter didn’t let go, “When the demons came and scoured the earth in the 21st century, there were plenty of people left maimed in some way. Some of the scientists at the time had made huge strides in prosthetic technology and others had been working in the field of nanotechnology. Out of need they began to work together and over time developed the first working cybernetic replacement parts. The initial prototypes were clumsy and didn’t always work the way they were intended. Those scientists became the first of the techno-mages and a group of them worked to refine the technology to what you see today. There are some mages working on making the cybernetic replacements resemble the original parts more closely, but utility is then sacrificed for appearance.” They heard footsteps in the hallways and Sam smiled sadly, “It sounds like they’ve adjourned for the day. They didn’t call me back so things are still undecided. I’m supposed to be in my room awaiting judgment, but wanted to check on you.”

“I’m glad you came, I didn’t know if you would. I overheard enough from the infirmary staff to know you were in a shit ton of trouble over bringing me here. I hope this visit doesn’t make it worse,” Dean was still holding the other man’s hand and didn’t want to let go, “I don’t believe in god, but I hope to hell this works out for you. He gave the mage’s hand a light squeeze before he released it and was encouraged by the fact that the mage had let him hold his hand at all.”

Sam could feel tears prick at the corners of his eyes, he felt like his only friend right at that moment was a man who only days ago would have tried to kill him if he hadn’t been so injured and that somehow made him feel that much more alone, “Thanks, I need all the luck and good wishes I can get. I’ll figure out a way to let you know what happens if they don’t let me visit you again.”

Dean watched the golden giant stalk out of the room and wished there was a way he could help his case, but knew in his heart that no one else in the priory would take the time to listen to what he had to say about a situation that while it was of his making, was none of his business.


	5. Sentencing

“Brother Samuel, please approach the bench,” intoned the middle of the three Master Magi, “We are ready to render a verdict and sentence.”  
Sam rose and approached the three Masters, his eyes averted and his knees shaking. It had been three days since he’d given his testimony before the assembly and he wasn’t sure whether the prolonged deliberation was a good or a bad thing.

The Master to the left rose, “Brother Samuel, this assembly finds you guilty of aiding and abetting an enemy of the Brotherhood and guilty of using poor judgment in bringing the hunter onto priory grounds. The fact that you acted out of kindness and consideration of a fellow human being has been considered and while not redemptive in and of itself has factored into the penance you will be required to complete.” Sam let out the breath he’d been holding penance meant they weren’t disbarring him!

The Master to the right rose as the other took her seat, “We have carefully considered all the factors surrounding your decision as well as your exemplary record of service to the Brotherhood. The fact that your actions were taken in order to care for a fellow human being in a time of crisis, as noted by Master Eve, have certainly been considered. That said, your decision to bring a hunter, a known enemy of the Brotherhood of Techno-mages, onto priory grounds is a grave infraction of the rule that you swore to uphold at your investiture and cannot be overlooked.

Before I pronounce your sentence, I want you to know that this assembly was split as to how to discipline you in this regard. I believe that the compromise we agreed upon is fair, even while I know you will consider it unduly harsh. Brother Samuel, for a period of one year and a day, beginning when the hunter is pronounced healed and able to travel, you are sentenced to become a brother without a home. You will spend your time traveling between the priories and the cities as required, delivering goods, messages and attending to the Brotherhood’s affairs in matters of trade. You will be given shelter in the priories when necessary for your safety but will spend no longer than a period of three days in any given priory. You will be given supplies, clothing and sustenance for your travels and will be allowed to use priory owned cabins in the blasted lands for shelter. In addition you will be given the sum of 20 crowns and the use of a cart and pony for the length of your penance. All your current research will be handed off to another brother or sister and you will be banned from all priory libraries.

You will be required to check in with the Master Magi of the closest priory every four to six weeks. They will be allowed to question you regarding your travel and activities and may choose to entrust you with messages for any other priory or Master Mage. They will send reports back to us here at the Priory of Scion and if at any time we feel that you have further violated any part of the rule you’ve sworn to uphold, you will be disbarred from the Brotherhood in disgrace and become a stranger and enemy of all. Do you have any questions regarding your penance?”

Sam was both shocked and relieved by his sentence. When so much time passed after his testimony he’d expected to be disbarred and was therefore relieved that he was still a part of the Brotherhood. The loss of his research and access to books however, was a harsh enough blow to almost bring him to his knees. His raison d’etre for so long had been studying the ancient texts that he felt their loss as acutely as he would have if he’d lost another limb. He steadied himself and drew a deep breath before speaking, “I am grateful for this assembly’s generous terms of penance and I will thank Jobs Gates each day of my sentence for the compassion shown by my brothers and sisters in this matter. I understand what is required of me and have no questions for the council at this time.” Sam waited with his head bowed for dismissal.

___________________________________________________  
Dean, tired of lying around in bed had asked for and received permission to walk around the courtyard outside the infirmary, a courtyard that was bordered on three sides by cloistered offices and rooms, the fourth side open to the gardens and pasturage for the priory’s livestock. He’d been given a walking stick to help take some of the weight off of his still healing leg and soon realized it was going to take some more time to get his leg back in shape. He tired quickly only making it across the courtyard and was resting on a bench seemingly placed there for recovering patients. He saw Sam enter the courtyard before Sam saw him and knew by the look on the other man’s face that the verdict he’d received wasn’t good news.  
“Hey Sam, I’m over here,” Dean called out before Sam stepped into the infirmary.

Sam stopped when he heard Dean call his name and looked around the courtyard for his friend. ‘Friend?’ he thought and then smiled because he realized that he really did consider the hunter his friend. He’d spent a part of each day since they’d arrived talking to the older man and trying to keep him entertained while he recovered. He felt the hunter was his responsibility since he’d brought him into this situation, but realized when he heard his voice it was more than responsibility. He genuinely liked the guy. He sat down next to Dean on the bench, “So, it’s not good, but I’m not disbarred, which is a blessing at least.”

“What was their decision? How harsh were they? I’ve been out here so didn’t overhear anything inside.” Dean looked over at the mage and seeing his distress wanted to reach out to comfort him but didn’t know if it would be appreciated.

“How was the walk? How much pain are you in right now?” 

“Don’t change the subject you know you’re going to tell me eventually, you might as well get it over with. I’m not going anywhere,” Dean adjusted himself slightly on the bench so they were sitting a little closer together.

“Like I said, I’m not disbarred, but I am technically banished,” he sat forward, elbows on his knees and hands on his face, “for a year and a day from whenever you’re released I’ll be restricted from priory grounds for periods longer than three days. I’m to spend my time traveling between priories with messages and supplies and trading in the cities for whatever priory I’m nearest to at the time.”

“That doesn’t sound too bad, life on the road can be fun and sometimes you meet really interesting people,” the hunter, who had spent most of his life traveling the blasted lands hunting for creatures and criminals alike, nudged the mage’s shoulder. “You might like it once you start.” He glanced sideways through his lashes looking to see how Sam was reacting.

Sam sighed, “Maybe, but that’s not all. I’m to be denied access to any texts and have to turn my current research over to another mage. I’ll be completely cut off from the libraries for the term of my penance. That’s the hardest part. It’s all I’ve ever done and I have to walk away from it and be grateful to them for allowing me to become their errand boy.”

“That’s bullshit! I thought you said once you were on a project you finished it? That’s just fucked up. Do you have to turn your research over right away? I could have a relapse, have trouble walking or maybe fall down a lot if it will help you stay longer,” Dean didn’t really have a clue how to comfort the mage. He was used to working alone and other than brief affairs had never had any kind of committed relationship. He awkwardly placed his hand over the other man’s and squeezed it lightly in support, almost surprised by the squeeze he received in return. “I really don’t mind.”

“I think I’ll have to start transitioning the work right away, it will take some time to bring whoever they decide to take on the work up to speed on what I’ve found, but thanks for the offer. It’s…..it’s…..really nice of you.” They sat quietly for a few minutes, each enjoying the contact and the company of the other.

“Let me know if you change your mind. Shit, there’s that nurse, Jolene. She hates me, well they all hate me, but she’s a queen bitch. Probably has a huge needle she wants to stick in my ass. Walk back with me?” Dean allowed the mage to help him up off the bench, “Maybe she’ll postpone whatever fresh hell she’s got cooked up because you’re visiting me.” 

They took the long way around the courtyard, walking a little slower than necessary and stifling laughs at the look of outrage on the nurse’s face. Sam, already in enough trouble, apologized for keeping her patient away too long and told his friend he’d be back after dinner with a chessboard.

A few days later they talked over the chessboard during what had become their nightly game and Dean was losing again. He was a terrible player and didn’t really even like the game, but liked spending the time with Sam so he was doing his best to use the hints and strategies Sam offered each time it was his turn to move. His friend had a soothing voice and he liked listening to him talk regardless of the topic. That evening though he had an agenda and once he was losing well enough that coaching couldn’t save the game he launched into his questions.

“So Sam, is there any way they’d let you show me where the books are kept, not go in or touch a book or anything outrageous, just a peek through the door? I’ve never really seen a real book, just the small paper editions that are sold in the city, since I’m here I’d love to take away the memory of a real library,” Dean was counting on his friend’s love of the books and other material kept by the priory so that he’d understand someone wanting to catch a glimpse of such a treasure.

After checking to make sure he wasn’t being the butt of one of Dean’s bad jokes Sam considered the request. “I don’t know, Dean, I’m on probation while you recover. They could still decide to disbar me, but I can understand why you’d want to see it, it’s an incredible, unforgettable sight. You’ll probably never have another opportunity in your lifetime to see something like our library. So maybe, if we went at a meal time or during worship….the library and scriptorium would be just about deserted, but it’s a fairly long walk there and back. Are you up to something so strenuous?” Sam was still watching Dean’s reactions very closely trying to assess whether or not the man was serious or playing him for a fool. The green eyes looking back at him didn’t betray any hint of dishonesty or prevarication and Dean seemed genuinely interested.

“I think I can make it, if you’ll let me lean on you a bit there and back, but I don’t want to get you into any more trouble here. You put yourself at risk of losing your place and have lost your work just by helping me. I’d only want to do it if you felt it was safe for you,” Dean was sincere in his wish to not cause any more difficulties for his friend, but really needed to see where the library was located and how to get there.

Sam sat in silence studying the chessboard; he could have had Dean in checkmate a couple of times already but was prolonging the game so they could spend more time together without having to ask if he could just sit with him. He dropped the volume of his voice slightly, “Day after tomorrow. I’ll skip breakfast and worship, they won’t be too surprised at me sitting it out, after all I’ve been censured and spending time pouting in my room wouldn’t be too out of line. I’ll come get you just after they bring your meal to go for a walk. As long as no one sees you actually in the doorway, and I can check first, we should be OK. If anyone sees us after that, there is a beautiful stained glass window down at the end of that hall and I can say I wanted to show it to you while strengthening your leg. They want us out as quickly as possible so no one will whine about me pushing your recovery.   
If you really want to this, Sunday morning is the best bet. You can change your mind when I come to get you and we can just walk around the courtyard so think about it. Checkmate.” Sam gathered up the chessmen and put them away while Dean worked through the proposed plan.

“I won’t change my mind, I really don’t want to miss this chance and I will owe you even more than I already do for giving me this chance,” Dean smiled at his friend clasped his hand as if coming to an agreement, but more for the contact than anything else. “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

Forty-eight hours later they were again talking over the chessboard. Their stealth mission to view the library had been a success and Sam had even been able to show Dean the study carrel that had been his before they left and continued down the hall to see the window. “Dean, your move, are you feeling all right?” Sam thought his friend was more distracted than usual and was playing worse which he hadn’t thought was possible, “Did you overdo it today?”

“I’m sorry, Sam. I think I did do too much today, I’m exhausted and I can’t seem to keep my mind on the game. Do you mind if I turn in early tonight?” Dean watched worry cross his friend’s face, “I’m fine Sam, just tired. I’m going to have to man up here soon anyway, not sure they’re going to give me much longer to recuperate. Jolene’s been meaner than usual and I think she’s already set to kick my ass out the front gate.”

Sam laughed at Dean’s jab at Jolene, she really was an unpleasant person, even when she was trying to be nice and she was no longer trying with either of them, “OK, Dean. Get some rest. I think we have to plan to leave by mid-week. I’ll need to take you blind folded to that same spot and you can at least ride in the cart for a half a day before we part ways.” Sam thought he saw the light fade a bit in the other man’s eyes when he mentioned parting ways. ‘No,’ he thought, ‘I’m sure I’m seeing what I want, not what’s there.’

They exchanged good nights and Dean watched the mage leave the room and felt kind of empty, “No time to sit around mooning after a man you can’t have,” he muttered to himself while looking for his clothing in the storage under the bed. He found his black leathers and soundlessly slipped into them using his other clothing and pillows from the bed next to his to fill out his ‘sleeping form’. Jolene wasn’t on duty that night and the nurse there for the night never left the nurse’s station unless you created a huge fuss. He slipped out of the infirmary and through the dark courtyard without a sound.

Thinking about leaving made Sam more lonely than he’d felt in years. He’d be leaving the only home he’d ever known, on bad terms with the people he’d grown up with and trusted and then parting from a newer and yet almost better friend at the same time. He carefully went through his meager belongings trying to decide what was important to take along, and finally decided he couldn’t part with anything - no longer sure he’d ever be welcomed back after spending the next year as homeless.

The day for their departure was fair and they left the priory as the sun rose over the horizon making sure Sam would have time to make it to the next halfway house well before dark. Dean had relapsed over the last couple of days and Sam was concerned, but they’d worn out their welcome and the older man was strangely quiet and withdrawn. He even snapped at Sam the day before for fussing over him so much. Sam chalked it up to spending so much time in the infirmary and was convinced he’d feel better once they’d gotten away from the priory and back on the road where Dean felt the most comfortable. The morning passed in comfortable silence. Dean pretended to doze, but his mind was sharp and his hearing tuned for any sound of pursuit. He willed the damn pony to go faster, wishing he had Sam’s ability. He needed to put as much distance between him and the priory as possible and he couldn’t let Sam know what he’d done or why. Sam had to be able to maintain plausible deniability of what he’d done. It was the only way the Masters at the priory wouldn’t end up blaming Sam and disbarring him completely.

They finally reached the point where he could take the blind fold off. ‘Now or never,’ Dean thought as he strapped his blades on his back and gathered up his things, “Sam, listen up.”

Sam turned from watering the pony to see his friend armed and ready to move on. He was hurt and confused, “Dean, I know we didn’t talk about it, but I thought we’d travel together at least a couple of days to make sure you were doing OK.” He’d really counted on the company, at least for the first few days as he started his new and sure to be lonely year of exile. He figured he had the answer to the question that had been haunting him; the hunter wasn’t attracted to him and wanted nothing more to do with him. He didn’t think things could get any worse for him. 

“Sam,” Dean approached the mage, head down, not meeting the other man’s eyes, “you need to trust me. I know it’s asking a lot, but trust me,” he took the other man’s hand in his and pulled him closer, “and look for me in Mt. Laurel in six weeks. I’ll explain everything then, but please, just trust me.” He looked up, caught the hazel gaze and used his other hand to bring the other man’s head down so he could press a kiss on the lips he’d been fantasizing about since he woke up in the infirmary. “I won’t let you down…..trust me.”

The green eyes were intense and Sam felt like they were looking through his eyes and into his soul as the last whispered ‘trust me’ echoed through his mind. He wanted to wrap his arms around the other man and not let go, ever. Instead he watched as the hunter jogged down the road and then veered off into the scrub. “Trust him,” he muttered to the pony. “He says to trust him and then he runs off, obviously in much better shape than he let us believe. So, Bert, do we trust him?” Sam was conflicted despite the brief kiss and the promise.

________________________________________________

Ten days later Sam reached the Priory of Grantham. He was greeted by several of the brothers who held him off to one side as they searched the cart and harness, emptying the sacks of food before repacking them and unwrapping each of Sam’s personal items, those they didn’t bother to re-wrap. Sam asked repeatedly what they were looking for and his queries were met with silence. He was standing before the Master Magi of the priory before he got any kind of answer or information.

“Brother Samuel, lately of the Priory of Scion, what have you done with it?” The middle Master demanded.

Sam was genuinely puzzled, “What are you looking for? I’d be happy to tell you where it is or what I’ve done with it, but I don’t know what ‘it’ is.”  
“Liar!” the left Magi shouted, “Liar! You took the text you were working on from the grounds of your priory! Your theft was discovered a day after you left in disgrace. And, where is the hunter whose life you put ahead of your vows to Jobs Gates?”

“Tell us Brother Samuel and return the book, we promise to go easy on you if you admit your theft now. We all understand how hard it would be to leave your research behind,” the right hand Mage was obviously playing the part of the friend in their drama.

“I didn’t take it, I don’t have it and I don’t know where it is,” Sam had a pretty good idea who’d taken the book, but he didn’t take it, have it or know where it was so was able to answer in concrete truths. “You’ve searched the cart and my things,” he began to undress shedding his cloak followed by his boots, leather pants and underpants until he stood naked in front of the Magi, “You can see I’ve got nothing concealed on my body. The hunter and I parted ways ten days ago and I don’t know where he was headed.”

The Magi conferred with each other while Sam dressed, he was furious with Dean, but kept hearing him beg for his trust. He thought it possible that one of the others at the priory had set him up hoping he’d be disbarred but kept his thoughts to himself and forced himself to relax while he waited for the Magi to address him again.

The middle Mage rose to address him, “Brother Samuel, it is apparent that you do not have the missing book on you, but the road between here and your Priory will be thoroughly searched and once the book is found you will be subject to further punishment by the Brotherhood. Be gone from here, there is no shelter for you at this priory. Know that once the text is recovered that we will find you, and may Jobs Gates have mercy on your soul.”

Sam and Bert traveled until it was almost dark before pulling the cart off the road. Using his will to light a lantern, Sam repacked his things, grateful that the brothers at the priory hadn’t taken or destroyed anything out of spite. He watered and fed his poor tired pony and settled himself in the cart before activating the concealment device. His mind refused to quiet enough for sleep and he kept thinking of Dean, the library, the book, the plea for trust and the kiss. He knew he’d meet Dean in Mt. Laurel but wasn’t sure he was going to like what he learned. However things turned out, Sam knew he’d been taught a painful lesson and prayed to Jobs Gates that he could find his way through the mess he’d made.


	6. Alone

Two weeks later Sam was about a day out from the third of the three priories in their province. Anywhere else he was sent would require even longer weeks of travel and he was already sick to death of his new life, he was lonely and he was bored. His mind couldn’t get past the sight of the hunter jogging away from him after begging for his trust. He was certain Dean had his book, his dreams had confirmed it for him, but didn’t give him any idea of Dean’s intent or where he’d taken the book. In addition he was kind of nervous about the kind of reception he’d get at the next priory. The ones farther out wouldn’t hear of the missing book for some time, but these closer priories used ravens to deliver messages between them and he didn’t really want to go through another round of accusations and explanations. He patted his pony as they walked, “It’s going to be a long year buddy, not sure how I’m going to make it, but at least I’ve got you.” Bert snorted in response and Sam figured that was a close to an answer as he’d get.

Sam was just about ready to break for the day when he was stopped by a couple of low level goblin demons looking for an easy target. He was able to dispatch them easily using both his height and strength advantage. He didn’t notice the five kobolds that emerged from behind a small rise as he was occupied. He soon found himself surrounded and unable to stop long enough to access his stored energy to add additional power to his hits. The kobolds were pressing their advantage although they took their fair share of hits from the spinning quarterstaff, each of the creatures had managed to get underneath Sam’s reach and nick him with their blades. Fortunately Sam was quick enough to avoid a serious cut.

He was finally able to take one of them out, but left his right flank open and received a more serious cut to his right arm, ‘shit,’ he thought as he continued to just keep the remaining kobolds out of range. He tried to isolate his will enough to enhance it with some of his stored power and managed to concentrate long enough to throw another one of the kobolds out of range and incapacitate the thing. He was sweating, bleeding and breathing hard as he concentrated on the remaining three demons and didn’t see the figure in red and black enter the fray until he’d taken out one of the demons with his twin katanas.

“Take the one on the left,” Dean shouted as he moved one of the demons away from Sam. “I’ve got this one,” and he did, the kobold was soon headless and lying at his feet. One on one Sam was able to finish off the last demon with a solid hit that caved in half the thing’s skull.

Dean sheathed his blades, looked over the young mage and nodded, while dragging the demons into one spot and off the road. “Let me see that arm,” he guided Sam to the back of the cart and had him sit while he examined the cut, “not too deep, I don’t think I’ll need to stitch it shut. Do you have dressings?”

Sam wanted to yank his arm away from the hunter but knew that was the act of a petty, spoiled child and the guy did just help him out, “yeah, the green pack. Water’s toward the front. What…..how…..where did you come from? I’ve got a million questions for you.”

“I know you do,” Dean set to cleaning the wound the area around it with the soap he’d found in the first aid pack, “but I’m not going to answer them yet. I can’t.” He felt the younger man start to pull away, “Easy Sam, let me do this for you,” Sam relaxed slightly but his eyes were narrowed and his mouth was set in a tight line. Dean thought he could hear him grinding his teeth and he wasn’t sure if it was due to the missing book or the fact that the hunter was touching him. “Try to relax a bit Sam it’s going to be OK.”

“OK? OK for who, you? I know you’ve got the book, where is it? Dean, why would you…..you knew what they’d do to me….how could you?” Sam’s voice was shaky and he felt tears threatening to start falling, the last week and a half had been so hard and so lonely, he really didn’t know what he’d do if he was permanently disbarred from the Brotherhood. 

Dean worked in silence watching the emotions play over Sam’s face willing him to understand, to trust. His hands were gentle as they worked sprinkling in the antibiotic and carefully tying the dressing in place before he sat next to the mage and took his hand in his, “Sam,” his voice was soft, pleading, “I swear on my blades that it will be clear soon, I’d never hurt you. In fact, I’ve sworn to not harm any techno-mage again, unless it’s self-defense. Please Sam, trust me just a little longer they’ll never find the book and all suspicion will stay on me, I planted enough clues pointing at me that I’m surprised they questioned you at all.” He wanted to put his arm around the mage and pull him close, but could feel Sam fighting to stay in control and still unsure of where Sam stood, contented himself with holding his hand.

“You’re asking for a lot,” the sigh accompanying the words came from the depth of Sam’s soul and carried enough anguish in it that it pulled at Dean’s heart and he did move closer and put his arm around the young man’s shoulders. Sam relaxed slightly into the one armed embrace, but couldn’t move completely past the theft of the book, “I don’t understand and I can’t see how this will work out at all.” His energy suddenly gone he slumped against Dean and rubbed the tears out of his eyes, “I……I want to trust you, I do, but……this is so much harder than I thought and I just….”

“I know Sam,” Dean rubbed his back lightly and jumped down off the back of the wagon. “Help me with the scum. I need the heads this time and then you can do your thing if you want.”

Sam was slow to join his friend but helped behead the remaining demons for Dean to wrap up, “I don’t have the energy to send this many to hell we can just leave them,” he cleaned his knife before tucking it back in his boot. “Hey Dean, thanks, but how….”

“Mt. Laurel, two weeks,” Dean turned and started to walk away, but stopped and turned, “I promise, it will all be clear……..,” he met the other man’s eyes, “I’ve got your back.”

________________________________________________________

The next weeks passed slowly, Sam was dying to know what was going on with Dean, and of course his book. The Priory of Detroit visit hadn’t gone as poorly as the one to Grantham. Sam was able to learn that they had found no trace of the book in the vicinity of the road between the priories and had assigned a couple of brothers to watch him as he left Grantham who saw no evidence of him stopping to pick up the book, or anything, after leaving the grounds. According to the Masters in Detroit suspicion was now clearly focused toward the hunter whom they hadn’t been able to trace. The Federation that supported the bounty system wouldn’t share any information about its members with the priories due to the age old prejudice on each side. The Master Magi of Scion had sent brothers to the closest town, Gilman, where they did the majority of their trading but they had no success in locating the hunter there either. The brothers found the merchants and residents were unwilling to talk to the mages about anything other than trade. Another group carefully searched the road between Gilman and the priory without finding a trace of either the book or the hunter.

Brother Samuel approached the city of Mt. Laurel with equal measures of trepidation and excitement. He was anxious to meet up with Dean again for a number of reasons, his practical side reminding him that the guy had stolen a book, something that for a man who’d spent his life in a priory was almost worse than outright murder. Books were more valuable than, well anything. The knowledge contained within them was irreplaceable and un-reproducible. He prayed again to his god, Jobs Gates, that the book was safe and that he’d be able to return it to the Priory undamaged. The other side, the more fanciful one, was looking forward to seeing the man’s green eyes, freckles, short spiky hair and absolutely irritatingly kissable lips. He hoped he’d read the signs right. It was a toss-up at any given minute which side was winning and Sam was irritable trying to figure out exactly what he felt for the enigmatic hunter.

Once in the city, he stabled Bert and set his cart up in the market zone. He’d sleep in the cart until his goods were successfully traded and then buy himself a room and bath in the hostel that catered to anyone with business in the market and was considered part of the market’s neutral territory before leaving the area. He hoped Dean would know to make his way to the market; it was too dangerous for a techno-mage to wander the streets of any city alone. They were open game to hunters and frequently subject to derision and violence if they encountered a group of rough-necks intent on ridding themselves of the magical influence of the mages.

The first day of an open market was always busy and Mt. Laurel’s market was no exception. Sam found the priory goods he’d brought were in demand and he was busy from sun up to sun down. He knew the Priory of Detroit would be pleased with the amount of sugar and flour he’d been able to get in trade for the fine silk they wove and the mead he’d brought from Scion was moving equally as well along with the honey, beeswax candles and soap that they’d included in his trade goods. Along with the staples, he’d been able to trade a couple of small toys he’d carved for some parchment for himself. He’d received a pen from the Masters at the priory when he took his final vows and planned to write down some of the things he encountered during his year of travel and was very pleased with the quality of the parchment he’d found. He hoped he’d be able to trade a few of his other carvings for ink before the market closed.

After securing his goods for the night, Sam looked around the market area and realized he’d waited too long to get something warm to eat, the food vendors common at all markets had already closed up shop for the night. He cursed, he was sick of travel rations, but hadn’t had a chance to eat all day and was starving. His pony was being cared for so it was one less chore he had to attend to before he could look after himself. He activated the concealment device and headed off the to the latrine area where he’d be able to rinse off the worst of the road dirt as well as take care of more personal business.

He was on his way back to his market stall when a figure materialized in front of him out of the darkness. He cursed again, having decided to leave his quarterstaff with the cart and went for the knife in his boot, but was stopped by a hand on his wrist. “Whoa, Sam, it’s me,” Dean stepped into the low light thrown by the lanterns lining the stalls. He was stopped in his tracks by the sight of the shirtless and wet mage. He felt desire sweep through his body and hoped to hell he wasn’t fucking up the best friendship he’d ever had as he reached out a hand and pulled Sam toward him with a slight tug on his belt loop. “I brought you dinner.” Dean tilted his head to one side and looked up at Sam through his lashes, suddenly bashful but unwilling to let go of the other man’s pants. He licked his lips nervously as he waited for the larger man to respond.

“Dean,” Sam had to look down and away, the green eyed man’s gaze was so intense and the hand on his pants had caused his cock to wake up and harden, “I…..I…..,” he didn’t know what to say, even with all his questions, the man, now rubbing his thumb lightly over the skin on his hip, was just so much more beautiful than he’d remembered. “Yeah…..um…..thanks, dinner’s appreciated.” He wanted him, gods he wanted him and throwing all caution aside, he raised his left hand, cradled Dean’s head and drew him closer. His other hand went to his waist and Sam lowered his mouth and brushed the lips he’d been dreaming of with the barest whisper of a kiss. “I’ve wanted to do that since you kissed me weeks ago,” he kissed a trail of light kisses across Dean’s mouth and licked at his lower lip.

“Don’t tease,” Dean growled and pressed himself up against the other man as he pushed his tongue into his mouth and took control of the kiss, his tongue running across Sam’s teeth and lapping at every part of his mouth that was within reach. Dean felt the mage’s hard cock digging into his stomach and he ground his own against the taller man’s thigh, swallowing Sam’s moans he backed him up against a post and ran both his hands up his chest to cradle his face before pulling back, looking him in the eye again and rubbing his thumbs across his cheekbones, “That’s better, right?”

Sam’s stomach growled loudly. He breathed a sigh of relief and he laughed, “Better, but I think I’m being reminded that I need some dinner. I’ve got mead and…..”

“Questions,” Dean interrupted, “I promised I’d fill you in and I will. You just looked so good, so damn good…..Come on, let’s get settled,” the hunter, more than pleased that the giant mage had both trusted him and returned his affection, set off in the direction of Sam’s stall.

Once they were comfortably settled in the cart Dean laid out the meat pies, cheese, bread and fruit he’d brought while Sam opened a couple of bottles of mead. They ate in companionable silence occasionally making small talk about the food, the market and the city, their thighs touching and each glancing over at the other almost as if to reassure themselves that the other was actually there.

“Thanks Dean, this is a much better meal than I made you,” Sam was full and was happy. He’d worried that the hunter wouldn’t show up and he’d never see him or his book again. He was strangely content for the time being with only one of the two.

“Yeah, but you had to do much more to patch me up than I had to do for you so I figure in that respect we’re even. The mead is still excellent…..just one of the things I’ve missed since leaving your priory,” Dean rested a hand on Sam’s leg leaving no room for doubt on what one of the other things was, “I promised answers, will you let me talk and ask your questions after I’ve finished? I may answer most of them before they’re asked.” He rubbed at the other man’s leg absently, “it’s a long story, but I think you’ll understand why I did what I did once I get to the end.”

Sam took Dean’s hand in his and savored the feel of it, the warmth, the calluses, and the rough skin. He swallowed some mead before answering, as if wanting to prolong the moment he’d be disappointed by the other man, “yeah, go ahead. I admit that I’m more than just a little curious.”

“At first I was just going to take your book so that you didn’t have to stop your research while you were exiled from the priory, I felt…..no still feel responsible and guilty as fuck for what happened to you because you saved my life. I told you before I wouldn’t have done the same thing and that somehow makes it worse, you sacrificed your work, and your home for a man who would have taken your head,” he looked down, too ashamed to look at the other man knowing how much of a better person he’d proven to be with his actions, “So as I lay there in the infirmary trying to avoid looking at Jolene, I struggled with how I could even begin to pay you back.”

“You didn’t…don’t owe me a thing, I’d do it again. Too many lives have been wasted since the demons took over, I couldn’t sit by when I could do something to help,” Sam looked over at his friend and smiled. “Besides, you are so damn pretty!” 

Dean grabbed his hand back, “Pretty? Pretty? Come on sweetheart, you’ve got the long locks and those color changing eyes. You’re pretty, I’m ruggedly handsome!” They both laughed and nudged each other with their shoulders, each pleased that the other found him attractive.

“So continuing, you seemed to come even more alive when you talked about your work and how important the book could be in stopping the demons. Then you had to tell me you’d have to hand your project off to someone else and it was like something died in your eyes. I knew then what I’d do for you, what I wanted to do for you. I did lie to you about why I wanted to see the library, but I couldn’t tell you what I was planning for two very important reasons. You wouldn’t have taken me if you’d known and the second reason is the more important one, you couldn’t know what I was up to, you had to be innocent. Your Masters couldn’t have any doubt about your involvement or it wasn’t worth doing. So I acted a little more injured than I was to give me time to get you to show me the library and then time to actually commit my crime. That bitch Jolene was starting to suspect I was a lot better than I let on so I moved a little faster than I originally planned to and was really glad you were ready to go or it would have fallen apart completely.”

“When did you take the book?”

“Two nights before we left, I was tired, not up to our chess game? That ass, Herb was on duty and he wouldn’t budge from the nurse’s station unless you were dying. I was lucky, there was only one or two others in the library work area, and your station still had your things in it. I grabbed the book, replaced with one from the shelves that sort of resembled it and was back in bed before Herb had to take his first piss of the night. I just had to sweat out the next day and night and hope no one was in a hurry to take on your work. I swear Bert was moving slower than ever the morning we left and I was dying in the cart listening for the sounds of pursuit.”

“Why didn’t you just give me the book liked you’d planned?”

“It was a crappy plan from the get go. I knew they’d hand you your ass on a platter if you were caught with the book, it would have ended any chance you had of returning and I didn’t need another reason to feel guilty as hell, so I revised the plan and was going to give it to you after some time had elapsed and the powers that be in your world were satisfied that you didn’t have anything to do with taking a book from the priory grounds.  
The night after I took the book, Herb, my asshole friend, was sleeping in the station and I decided to take a look at what I’d risked my life and your career for. I’m sure you’ve realized that I didn’t really go to school, I kind of screwed around in school and don’t read well at all beyond, food, beer, whores, you know the important things. I knew even if I could read I’d never be able to read the language in the book and I was right but……here’s the thing, Sam,” Dean stopped long enough to take a healthy pull from his bottle, “I recognized the writing and pictures in the book. I’d seen it before.”

“What?! Where? Another priory?”

“Patience, it’s coming, it’s a long story. Give me a minute though, I need to piss,” Dean jumped off the cart and walked away from the lantern lit area to relieve himself. 

Sam couldn’t believe what he’d heard. As far as he knew the Priory of Scion had the only book that was anything like the journal he was translating. He knew the Masters met yearly to review each other’s inventory lists to see if there were books relevant to current research. ‘Fucking unbelievable,’ he thought. What a coup if he were to find an undiscovered cache of books. 

“You OK? You look a little sick,” Dean settled next to the mage and took his hand again. “I promise the story gets better,” the hunter cocked his head to the side as he looked at his friend trying to decide if he was angry, shocked or a little of both. He lightly stroked Sam’s face with the back of his other hand, “Sam, you OK? The book is fine, please don’t worry about it.” 

Sam turned his face into the caress and opened his eyes reading the concern in the green eyes looking back, “I’m fine, just…..just amazed, what you’re saying….it’s like, like a dream.”

“I knew you’d get all hot and bothered about there being another book,” Dean smirked at his friend, who blushed in return, “who knew you’d be so easy! Seriously though, I’d seen other books like the one I took from your library in a place about two or three weeks walk from your priory.

“A couple of years ago I was fighting off a bunch of mid-level crossroads demons that had been having some kind of demon rave at a crossroads in the middle of nowhere. I probably should have left them the hell alone, but hey, I don’t always think things through and before I knew it I was in the middle of the rave hacking and slashing at the mother-fuckers. I was holding my own, but losing ground fast and was going to have to retreat, but my exit was blocked by some old culvert with a door. I’m all ‘fuck me I guess I’m going to die here today’. My arm had been cut by one of the son of bitches’ knives and my hand was slick with blood, I was having trouble holding on to Courage, so I reached behind me with my bloody hand and tried the door.

“No one was more surprised than I was when it opened. It wasn’t even rusty or stuck or anything! It swung open and I slammed it shut as soon as I was through and braced the door with my body figuring the demons wouldn’t be far behind me, but they weren’t. The door wouldn’t open for them. I could hear them throwing themselves against it and howling but even when I stepped away from it, it held.” Dean finished his mead and Sam handed him another one motioning for him to go on already! “So here I am at the top of a metal stairway that led down, down into the ground and it’s dark as fuck. I’m fumbling around in the entrance trying to find some matches or anything in my pack and I bump the wall with my bleeding arm, you’re not going to believe this part, light appeared out of nowhere! Glowing things on the walls and ceiling, I thought it was magic….I wasn’t scared, well, yeah, I was a little scared but I was more curious. I went down the stairway and Sam it was a place, a home or something. The walls were lined with books and weapons. 

“I’m not describing it well at all you have to see it to believe it. Anyway, I figured I’d have to wait out the demons at the door and needed to dress my arm so I made myself at home. There was no one else there, at least in the few rooms I checked. I have to show you the water works because I can’t even begin to describe how it was just there when you turned a handle. I cleaned up, dressed my wound and looked at some of the books. There were some like yours, handwritten small books and others that were huge and the words didn’t look like handwriting. It seemed like every one had different words, maybe different languages? I don’t know enough to be able to tell, but you would and I want to show it to you, I want to take you there.” Dean stopped and looked sideways again at Sam who was still trying to digest what he’d heard. “I took your book there after we split up. I wanted to make sure it was the same and Sam, it is! Some of the writing even looks the same. You have to come with me I don’t think anyone else knows about this place.”

“Did the door open for you again or did you have to make yourself bleed to open the door?” Sam was struggling to make sense of what he’d heard, but he was so used to thinking through his research his questions just came naturally, “and the lights, the glowing globes, did they appear for you again?”

Dean knew Sam was smart, all the techno-mages where, which is what made them so scary and of course the magic, well technology, but it still looked like magic, so he wasn’t surprised at his questions, “Yes, the door opened and the lanterns?, came on when I touched this panel by the door. I didn’t even have to bleed on them….am I magic? I didn’t say a spell or have a potion or anything, it just worked…..like magic. Maybe I woke up the magic; that can happen right?”

“That last one might be the closest description but I have to think about this. You’re right the story is amazing, almost unbelievable, and yeah, I have to….fuck, need to see it for myself. Sorry, I don’t usually curse out loud. You have no idea how astonishing it is that there is a library of undiscovered books. The ones the priories have were discovered ages ago when the structures of the old world were still standing. Those first mages, the ones who worked on cybernetics and others too, traveled to as many places of learning as they could to secure the books that are shelved at each priory. Unfortunately not all the books were stored properly and many have crumbled or the ink has run off the pages. 

“Originally the books were divided by category and of course those first mages had the right language skills to read the texts, but over the years, centuries I suppose, things got mixed up and spread around and we’ve lost the ability to read most of the original languages. Still, the books represent knowledge and that knowledge could hold the answer to our demon problem so we work at trying to decipher the texts. 

“Thank you Dean, thank you for thinking of me, I’m so….I don’t even know what I am.” Sam drew the other man to him and pressed kisses from his forehead to his mouth where he bit lightly at the pouty lower lip until Dean groaned in frustration and opened his mouth to capture the tongue that was torturing him. They kissed slowly, yet thoroughly and urgently, both men were aroused by the kiss and were rutting against each other, trying to increase the pressure and friction on their engorged and sensitive dicks.

Dean broke the kiss and ran his hand down Sam’s cybernetic arm still amazed by the reaction to his touch drew from the metal arm and took his hand, “You are incredible and I want you more than ever, but not here, not now,” he chuckled at the frustration on Sam’s face. “We’re in the fucking market, we can do better. I want to do better for you,” he pressed light kisses everywhere he could reach as punctuation between the words, “but I’ll stay here with you tonight if you’ll let me. Walking away from you was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.” Dean worked himself down so that he was sprawled across Sam’s chest, holding his left hand to his chest.

Sam smiled and pulled Dean closer with his right arm. He kinda had to piss, but decided it wasn’t worth the trouble just then and relaxed as Dean’s breath ghosted across his still bare chest. He was thrilled at the prospect of the new books, but decided the best gift that night was the one he held against his chest.


	7. Together

Dean returned to the market just as Sam was finishing up trade for the day. The hunter stayed well back until everyone had cleared out of the area before approaching the mage. “Hey you. You done for the day? Have plans?”

“What? Oh hey Dean, yeah, just straightening things up,” Sam was struck again by the almost otherworldly beauty of the other man. He was positive this was all a mistake or some kind of weird fever dream and that’d he’d wake up on the road alone and friendless. “Um, plans? I kind of have to stay on neutral ground.”

“See, I was thinking about that today while taking care of my current bounties and picking up a new list. You stay masked and cloaked even here right? So no one really knows what you look like, other than that you’re freaking huge…..” Dean paused and gave his friend a smirking half smile, “Not that I’ve got any problem with that.”

“Yeah, but I am cyborg as well as a mage, the arm doesn’t come off,” the mage tried to puzzle out exactly what his friend was getting at, but absurdly pleased by his smile, “So I don’t think I’d go unnoticed, even in a crowd.”

“I thought of that, look what I brought,” Dean handed his friend a package, “Open it, then I’ll explain.” Sam was puzzled, but opened the package as requested. Inside was a suede shirt and a matching pair of gloves, “I had the seamstress redo the sleeves to be extra-long, I’m pretty sure the shoulders are big enough.” The hunter took the shirt and held it up to his friend’s back checking the width against his shoulders, “Yeah, I think this’ll work fine. I thought that if you were dressed and your arm and hand covered, no one would be able to tell you’re a techno-mage – the only difference is the cybernetics and you’re not all cyborg. You can’t tell your arm is metal unless you end up in a fight, and we’ll avoid that.”

“You know mages aren’t welcome anywhere but the market,” Sam was still working through the rush of words he’d been struck with.

“Right, but without your cloak, mask and arm showing, who would ever know one way or the other. You’re not marked anywhere that I’ve seen……yet,” the sly half smile was back and the hunter’s green eyes were laughing, “So you dress in the shirt and gloves and we go into town and hit a couple of the taverns, who’s going to know you aren’t who you say you are.” The hunter watched the emotions go through the other man’s eyes, suspicion, hope, fear and maybe acceptance?

“I don’t know Dean…..”

“I know you have been used to staying on the fringe and I get why, but Sam aside from the fact that I want to spend more time with you and maybe show you off a bit, I think it’s a good idea for you to blend in and see what people say about the reclusiveness of your order. What if when you return you can provide your Masters not just new books, but the wisdom of experience. I can guarantee you that the Master Magi have never taken the time to find out what the general population thinks or believes and I think it’s done your order a disservice.”

Sam thought about it as he drew the shirt over his head and settled it onto his shoulders, it fit well, Dean had a good eye, “You don’t sound uneducated when you speak, I don’t mean that negatively. The shirt’s a good fit.”

The hunter ran his hands down his friend’s back pretending to smooth the wrinkles out of the shirt, but really just wanting to touch the other man, “I knew it would fit, it looks good on you, even if I kind of prefer you shirtless,” Dean blushed as he spoke and helped the mage tie the laces up the lower half of his arms, Sam smiled at the compliment and the attention.

“I’ll go with you if you answer a question for me. The last time we met before this, on the road, how did you show up at just the right time to help me out? My guess is you were shadowing me but why not just travel with me?” Sam pulled the gloves on; they too were a good fit.

“Yeah, I was shadowing you for a little bit, I had just come back from the culvert and I needed to fulfill a couple of contracts for the Federation. I’d been tracking those kobolds that surprised you and they led me to you. I wasn’t ready to…..I was still trying to figure out how to tell you everything and was worried that priories might have had eyes on you, so I thought it best to stay hidden. I didn’t think there’d be any other techno-mages at the market since you were tasked with the job and felt you’d be safer if we remained apart. It was a lot harder to walk away that second time if it matters.”

Sam laughed softly and took a step toward the hunter and drew him into his arms, “Yeah, it matters and I understand,” he raised the other man’s face to his and claimed his mouth in a searing kiss that had them both panting when they finally broke apart. “So where are you taking me?”

“I’ve got two places in mind, each a slightly different atmosphere, different class of people, one more working class the other a merchant class place. You’re going to do the disappearing thing with the wagon right? Will Honor and Courage be safe if I leave them behind? I don’t want to be more memorable than we’ll be just by being us,” Dean smiled at Sam, his eyes crinkling in amusement as the giant shook his head at him. “I mean come on Sam, look at us!”

“So blending in is out?” Sam returned the smile with one of his own that showed off his dimples, “Yeah, your weapons will be safe. Do we need to completely disarm?”

Dean unbuckled his shoulder harness and slipped out of it easily, he also removed his leather jacket. Under it he was wearing a shirt similar to the one he brought for Sam but it was green and it made his eyes appear even more green than they were naturally, “No, keep any concealed knives you carry on you, but we’re not really looking for trouble so hopefully we don’t end up having to use them,” the hunter checked his concealed blades while Sam engaged the concealment device on the wagon.

“Just how many knives do you have on you?” Sam was amused and a little curious. He hadn’t found that many blades on the hunter when he treated his wound.

“I’ve got five on me now, one on each forearm and in each boot with the fifth in the small of my back. I added a few since we met on the road I had stolen the book from your priory after all. You’re well trained with your quarterstaff and I figured the rest of your order would have had weapons training as well and twice now I’ve been backed up where I can’t use Honor and Courage effectively, the shorter blades work better at close contact if necessary. I spent most of my last reward money on the extra blades.” Dean bumped the mage’s shoulder with his, “Don’t worry, I’ll cover us if anything happens, but remember we’re not looking for trouble so chances are we won’t run into any.”

They were soon entering the first of the two taverns Dean had mentioned, The Spotted Dog. As Dean had said it was a place that catered to the working men and women of the city and was busy for a weeknight, but then the market usually brought more people into the city than usual. Sam felt everyone’s eyes on him as they entered and felt like everyone could see through the disguise and knew his true nature.

“They just think you’re good looking because you are,” Dean reassured his date as he stepped up the bar to place their order, “face it, we’re the best looking couple here. Hey Max, long time!”

“Hunter! It has been a while, demons taking you farther afield or are you after pricier bounty? What’ll it be for you boys?” The tavern owner was used to seeing Dean with different guys, but no one nearly as good looking as his current date.

“I was telling my friend Sam that you might have some of the priory mead on hand. I saw a mage at market and he’s never tried it,” Dean slipped very easily into his role and put an arm around Sam’s waist and drew him a little closer trying to keep the younger man from panicking.

Max figured the taller man was from one of the outlying provinces and not used to the acceptance same sex couples found in the larger cities, which was causing some of his discomfort, “As a matter of fact I do. Those secretive bastards brew the best mead in the area. If there wasn’t such a demand for it, I’d not trade with them at all. I’m always afraid that I’m taking home a hex along with anything I’ve traded for.” 

Dean paid for the two familiar bottles of mead and led Sam to one of the open tables, “Seriously Sam, we’ll blend better if you stop looking like I kidnapped you and you’re looking for an escape. It’ll be OK, relax a bit have some fun. I’m not gonna let anyone hurt you.” Dean took his hand and rubbed it lightly through the glove hoping to get Sam to feel more comfortable. He raised his bottle in a toast, “here’s to beginnings,” they touched bottles and both drank.

“I just feel like everyone knows,” Sam whispered.

“That’s just your guilty conscious speaking,” Dean caught Sam’s eye and smiled, “don’t play cards, ever, you can’t bluff to save your life. Fortunately everyone here just thinks you’re young and inexperienced in ‘city ways’. You’re blending in just fine.” 

They both sat back, still holding hands and watched the tavern as it filled up. Conversations drifted over to them in bits and pieces.

“…..got some great silk at market. Techno-mage made, so probably made with spells, but as long as it’s that nice, I’ll take it….”

“That mage at market today was scary. I know they all mask, but on such a big one it’s somehow more sinister….”

“….no Luke’s full of shit, there’s no way they’ll make the cities neutral territory, the citizens would never put up with that…”

“That’s why the bounty is so high on them they can disappear and reappear behind a hunter getting the advantage….”

“….I told you Tom was stepping out on Rachel. Didn’t I tell you that just last week…..”

“I’ll be glad when the market closes. Even with the outsiders staying in the market area, they make me nervous.”

“They’re not all talking about you, it just seems like it because you’re listening for it,” Dean reassured his friend, “remember they don’t know you, if they did they’d realize how foolish they sound.”

Sam knew that most people viewed his order with suspicion and no small amount of fear, but had never really heard too much of the misinformation that got spread around because he did stay isolated when at market and certainly on the road and in the priories, “You were scared of me at first too. I’m glad at least you’re not anymore.”

“I wouldn’t say scared…..OK, a little scared, but I was injured, couldn’t fight,” Dean looked over and smiled, “I’m glad you were there.”  
“I am too. I meant it when I said I don’t regret it.”

“I know,” Dean wanted to move closer and moved his leg so their thighs were touching instead, “Finish up and we’ll go to the other place. They’ve got entertainment too. It’s a nicer place. I just wanted to show you off here,” Dean pressed his thigh to Sam’s and the younger man blushed at the touch and the compliment.

They were soon back in the street and heading to the next tavern on Dean’s list, “It’s really called The Demon’s Den?” Sam was incredulous, who would want to drink in a demon’s den?

“Yeah. I think these city dwellers get a cheap thrill thinking that they’re close to a demon. Most of them wouldn’t know a demon if it bit them on the ass. They mostly keep out of the more populated areas, but every now and then a brave or maybe stupid one tries to make a stake in a city. If they’re slick enough, they can get by for a time, but they’re greedy in general and usually out themselves before too long. The place is just around the corner at the next intersection.”

Sam was fascinated by the shops they were passing as they walked through the city. He hadn’t realized that people traded and sold things every day, not just at the market on market days. He thought you could probably buy just about anything you wanted in a city if you had enough coin or trade goods. Anything but books, he didn’t see any shops with books. He hadn’t expected to but found himself looking for a book shop just the same, “Can you get anything here?”

“Probably, if you had enough money someone would figure out how to get you what you wanted. That’s one of the cooler things about cities in general. On the not so great side, there are people who would sooner take advantage of you than deal with you fairly and depending on where you are in a given city or town those people can be the majority. Sam, don’t go into a city without me, OK?” Dean realized that the mage’s innocence and inexperience would attract the less honest people like his bees to flowers, “At least not until you’ve been in a few more places.”

“No worries Dean. I don’t really plan on it I’m only here tonight because you asked me to be.” Sam took the other man’s hand. He wanted to pull him into an embrace but wasn’t really sure what the etiquette was even if the cities did accept same sex couples. He contented himself with squeezing his date’s hand and letting go.

The Demon’s Den was busier than The Spotted Dog and Dean led Sam to a table to wait for service rather than push his way to the bar. He wasn’t as well known here anyway and didn’t recognize the bartender. There was a minstrel tuning up his guitar on the small stage, his case open at his feet for tips.

“This guy’s pretty good. I’m gonna go make a request. Order us a couple of ales if the girl comes by while I’m gone, I think you’ll like it. The owner brews it himself,” Dean took off to talk to the minstrel leaving Sam alone to take in the other patrons of the tavern. Dean had been right it did attract a slightly wealthier class of people judging by the clothing the others were wearing. Sam felt like he and Dean still seemed to look like they belonged, as long as he kept his gloves on anyway.

“You’re new, you must be with the market, what can I get you?” the barmaid openly admired the mage, taking in his shaggy brown hair and broad chest.  
Sam blushed under the scrutiny, “Two ales, please.”

“Of course you’re with someone, just my bad luck then. Be right back with those, sweetie.” The barmaid disappeared into the crowd as Dean returned to their table.

“I ordered our drinks, the barmaid was kind of um….friendly,” Sam was still blushing.

“Of course she was, you’re the best looking guy here, next to me of course,” Dean pulled his chair a little closer to Sam and sat down. “Why shouldn’t she admire you?”

“Just not used to the attention I guess,” Sam looked down trying to will the blush from his face. “It’s not like that where I’m from.”

Dean put his hand on Sam’s leg under the table, “I know. Jolene….” Dean made a face that had Sam laughing.

“Yeah, Jolene among others,” the barmaid returned with their ales and Dean paid the tab.

“Always the cute ones,” she said over her shoulder as she moved to the next table with their drinks.

Sam looked puzzled so Dean explained for him, “Always the cute ones that are gay. We just have better taste than the average guy. Right?”  
“Right….I guess….” Sam had almost choked on his ale, “so not used to this.”

“Come on Sam, I’ve got your back. I won’t let those awful girls gang up on you, you’re with me and I’ll make sure they all know it,” Dean was smiling and looking over at the mage his eyes catching the other man’s, “I don’t like to share.”

Sam was still blushing when the minstrel struck his first chord. A signal for the patrons who were interested to stop talking and pay attention, “Thank you. As always it’s a pleasure to be here to entertain you fine ladies and less fine gentlemen,” he paused for a laugh. “I’ve had a couple of requests tonight so I’ll go ahead and do those first. If anyone else has a specific request you can see me when I break. Ok then, my first piece is The Rise of the Techno-mage,” the minstrel launched into the song.

“Have you heard this one before?” Dean leaned over and had his mouth almost against Sam’s ear as he spoke. Sam shook his head no, hoping Dean would keep talking and wishing at the same time to just listen to the lyrics, “Listen. We can talk about it later.” Dean nipped lightly at Sam’s ear before sitting back in his chair enjoying the blush that was still highlighting the mage’s cheeks.

The melody was beautiful and the words were poignant. Sam found himself taking hold of the hunter’s hand as the song progressed. Dean, in response moved a little closer knowing that the words would be upsetting to the mage. The song while beautiful was a long list of reasons why people should shun and fear the brotherhood of the techno-mage and he thought it was important for Sam to hear for himself some of the things that were being presented as reality. He moved close enough so that their shoulders as well as their thighs were touching hoping that the touch would provide the younger man with some comfort as he digested the song’s content.

The minstrel finished to cheers and applause from the room and moved into the next request which was a rowdier song about the creation of the Federation and the Hunter’s Guild. The room was soon clapping along and slapping their tables at the appropriate places. 

Taking advantage of the noise, Dean leaned in to Sam again, “This song is full of half-truths and outright lies as well. I asked for both so you could compare the two. I’ll be interested in your opinion on them,” he wanted to hold the mage close but obvious displays of public affection were frowned upon whether you were in a gay or straight relationship and contented himself with holding Sam’s hand and the body contact that sitting so close provided.

They’d ordered another round of ale and had nearly finished by the time the minstrel took a break and an ale offered up by one of the other patrons, “Let’s go Sam, we’ll head back to the market and we can talk at your cart. It’s pretty private this time of night.” Dean steered his friend toward the exit, nodding to a couple of other hunters he knew on the way out.

Sam started to ask questions as they left the tavern, “Not now Sam. Hold on to your questions until we’re alone. Even when they appear empty, the streets can have ears. Let’s move.” Dean set a pretty quick pace and took a less direct way back toward the market. About halfway back he turned them quickly into an alley and hushed Sam when he started to speak.

“I don’t know Terry, I swear they turned left, but I don’t see them,” the voice traveled well down the quiet street.

“Winchester’s crafty. Do you know if there are any turnouts down that way?”

“No, I don’t know this part of the city that good. This is your home town. Why don’t you know?”

“Shut up, Bruce. You know I haven’t been back here for a while and things change. You can be a total dunce can’t you? I think we’ll go right. I’m dying for an introduction to Winchester’s new piece. He looks freshly arrived to the big city, probably needs a man like me to show him the way things work in the big city….”

Dean let out the breath he was holding and took his hand off of Sam’s mouth – when had he done that? – while the two other hunters stalked off in the wrong direction. “Sorry Sam, let’s go.” They took off at a jog with Dean slowing down and checking at each intersection for the others before crossing. They made it back to the market and Sam’s stall without running into the other hunters again.

Sam deactivated the concealment device when they reached his stall, “Dean why were…”

“I know you have questions and I swear I’ll answer them, but I have one first. If we’re in the cart and you do that concealment thing are we concealed as well?” Dean was still watching and listening for signs of the others.

“Yeah, anything that’s touching the cart. It conceals Bert when he’s in the traces,” Sam watched his friend closely and started to get nervous as he watched the hunter’s eyes scan back and forth across the main market area.

Dean grabbed Sam’s hand and pulled him into the cart. “Do it. Turn the device on. Now Sam!”

Once the device was triggered Dean seemed to relax a bit, “Does it deaden sound?” Sam shook his head no and Dean very quietly moved so he was practically on top of him and put his mouth against his ear again, “shhh, no sound. I’m here, I’ve got you.” Sam shivered as Dean’s breath brushed his ear and the hair nearby.

“You are such a dumb shit, Bruce. I told you Winchester wouldn’t go to the market. What the hell would he be doing here at night? Shit, we’ll have to look for him tomorrow. That guy with him was a fucking giant. Too good for Winchester…”

“Terry, I swear I saw them head this way,” Bruce was whining a little as Terry pushed him around.

“Do you see anyone here? Do you? Come on moron, looks like I’m stuck with you tonight. Oh quit your whining,” Terry herded the other hunter out of the market place.

Dean reached up and turned Sam’s face to his and kissed him. He moved his hand to the back of his head and pulled him closer as his tongue teased at his lips asking for entrance. Dean bit at the mage’s lips and pushed his tongue in when his mouth opened. He kissed him deeply and thoroughly before pulling back and pressing lighter kisses along his jawline to his ear, which he nibbled at once he was there, “How early can we leave tomorrow?”  
Practically whimpering at the attention he was receiving from Dean’s mouth, Sam had to collect himself before he could answer, he kept his voice as quiet as Dean had, “I think the livery opens at six, we could be heading out the gates by six-thirty. There is another day of market though.”

“I know Sammy,” Dean was still biting and kissing at the sensitive skin just under Sam’s ear. “We’ve got to go; I don’t trust those two as far as I could throw them. I know you’re masked at market but if they get on my tail again, I’m not sure I can shake them when they’re not drinking. I don’t want them laying a hand on you,” Dean smoothed some of the mage’s hair back so he had more skin to work with and continued to suck, kiss and bite while he spoke, “I told you I don’t share.” 

Dean moved his other hand down the younger man’s chest and rested it over his rock hard cock and Sam bit back a moan, “Sorry Sammy, couldn’t resist.” Dean’s mouth was back on Sam’s and their tongues were sliding against each other trying to increase the friction and Sam was thrusting his cock up into the hand that wouldn’t stop stroking him.

“Dean, please…..” Sam moaned again as Dean increased the pressure on his cock.

“Please what Sam? Stop?”

“Gods no….” Sam gasped as Dean shifted so he could get a better grip on the cock he was stroking while grinding his own into Sam’s hip. Sam was able to catch Dean’s head and pulled him in for another kiss while begging him to not stop.

“That’s it Sam….” Dean panted the words out as the younger man kissed him deeply, “come for me, Sammy, come for me,” he increased the pressure on Sam’s cock and picked up the pace, still grinding his own hard cock into the mage. “Come for me, Sam…”

“Dean, I…..” Sam came with a gasp, almost embarrassed to have come in his own pants, but now wanting the same for Dean. He caught the hunter’s mouth again in a searing kiss and was pushing back against the cock at his hip, his other hand on the small of Dean’s back pressing him in even harder.

“Fuck, Sam, shit…..I,” Dean was close and Sam seemed to know it because he was working him even harder, “Sam, fuck, I’m…..” the cry Dean made as he came was swallowed by Sam’s mouth kissing him through the aftershocks of his orgasm until he felt the other man relaxing into his arms.

“Dean….”

“Shhhh, Sammy it’s all good,” Dean was kissing and sucking at Sam’s neck again, “we’ll leave tomorrow morning, yes?”

The young mage knew he’d leave with him, how could he not? Even with the little experience he had, Sam knew that Dean was special, that they were special. “Yeah, tomorrow. I can’t let you walk away again.” Sam pulled Dean even closer and rubbed his back until he drifted off to sleep. “Never letting you walk away again.”


	8. Travel

It was still dark when Dean walked back to the techno-mage’s cart from the latrine area, his mind filled with thoughts about the mage, a man he definitely wanted to know better and the punk hunters who had tried to follow them the night before who he most definitely wanted to keep away from his mage. Dean smiled at that thought of Sam as his mage but reminded himself that he needed to make sure Sam got out of Mt. Laurel without the other two realizing that he was the guy Dean had been with the night before. Terry and his small gang weren’t known for respecting the rules, other people’s belongings or choices. While Sam was certainly a force to be reckoned with, Terry and his kind didn’t play fair the way the mage did. He’d be at a disadvantage from the get go. Dean reached the stall just as Sam was preparing to don his mask.

“Hold up a minute, Sam,” Dean slipped under the taller man’s arm and grabbed his wrist, “I want one more look before you hide yourself away.”

Sam looked down into the enormous green eyes looking back at him and smiled, “We’ll be seeing plenty of each other on the road,” he reached out and pulled the hunter close, kissing him lightly on the mouth. “I’m going to get Bert from the stable I’ll have him hitched up and ready to go in about twenty minutes.”

“Here’s the thing, Sam I can’t be seen leaving the city with you,” Dean ran his hand down the mage’s arm, “that’ll just draw unwanted attention. I’m not walking away,” he added quickly as he saw a shadow in the other man’s eyes, “I’m going to leave a false trail for those goons from last night and I’ll join you at the first crossroad. You should make it there in about two hours at Bert’s usual pace,” Dean smiled at the mage, “In fact I bet I beat you there!”

“I’d be a sucker to take that bet,” Sam was laughing, “I understand and will look for you at the crossroad. Be careful, those guys made me nervous.”

“Don’t worry, Sammy I can handle those two losers with my eyes closed,” Dean finished arming himself and took off before the rest of the market started to stir and Sam headed off to the stable.

The techno-mage had no trouble leaving the city, most places were more than glad to see them go and Mt. Laurel had been no exception. Once out of sight of the city gates, Sam removed his mask and cloak, the weather was warm enough during the day that he preferred to go shirtless. The sun felt good on his skin and there was also the added benefit that he could recharge the solar cell in his arm. He fell into a rhythm as he walked and his thoughts drifted back to the night before.

He’d really enjoyed being out with Dean. It was the first time in his life he’d ever seen a city outside of the marketplace and the brief glimpse had fascinated him. Growing up in the priory his life had been simply defined; learn, study, work and research. They had time off of course, but like most mages he knew, he spent even his off hours reading one of the priory books or walking the priory lands. There were other mages who worked on reconstructing musical instruments from the ancient texts and even some who had taught themselves to read music and play so they hadn’t lacked for entertainment either. The city however seemed to house an endless array of different and unusual items from around the land. Sam thought he could spend days wandering the city streets without seeing the same thing twice, he had never before felt that his life in the priory had limited him but now couldn’t push away the feeling that there were things that he and the other mages were missing out on by keeping themselves so separate from the rest of the population.

The songs Dean had requested haunted his thoughts as well. He’d grown up knowing that most people had little to no knowledge about techno-mage society and that rumor and innuendo were more common than not when it came to what people thought they knew. He didn’t realize how grossly exaggerated those stories had become over the years. If you went by the song he heard you’d believe that the mages were out to control and enslave the non-mage population for some nefarious purpose that hadn’t been well defined in the song. It bothered him that others would judge him and the brotherhood just based on stories and songs but had to admit that Dean made a fair point when he’d said that if the mages continued to keep themselves hidden that there would be no way for people to learn any differently or enable them to draw their own conclusions.

His cybernetic arm was a whole other ball of wax. Not all mages were cyborg but almost all cyborg were mages. It had been made clear to him as he grew up that if he chose to be fitted with a cybernetic arm that he would automatically become outcast. A mage could leave the order, travel to a distant city and assimilate if he or she chose to do so. There was nothing to mark a mage as such, other than the cloak and masks they typically wore when encountering other people and of course the knowledge they gained while in the priories. Knowledge could be hidden or attributed to other sources but once he became cyborg a person lost the ability to ever assimilate with the non-cyborg population outside of the priories. It was widely believed that the cyborg had an advantage over the non-cyborg and that given a chance the cyborg would use that advantage to get ahead in life, not caring that the non-cyborg might be crushed in their rush to the top of the food chain.

Sam stopped briefly to water Bert and himself while he checked his map of the area. They were about forty-five minutes away from the crossroads where they were to meet up with Dean and he was looking forward to seeing him again. He was eager to talk to him about the songs and even more eager to hear more about the place where he found the books. It honestly baffled Sam that Dean was interested in him considering he had two strikes against him as far as the world outside the priories was concerned. Then there was the fact that Dean was so much worldlier, so much more experienced than he was. Sam, despite all his learning, felt he didn’t quite measure up in terms of the wisdom that Dean had gained by just living. Add in the fact that although he’d dated and fooled around with both sexes, he was still technically a virgin and Sam was almost ashamed. How could this beautiful, and he was beautiful despite his masculinity, older, more experienced man want anything to do with him?

___________________________________________

Dean arrived at their meeting place about thirty minutes early and sat with his back against the signpost. He knew he’d beat Sam and the pony. Bert was slow to begin with and was pulling a fully laden cart, you couldn’t ask for miracles from the small pony but Dean was anxious. He’d laid a couple of false trails around Mt. Laurel that he figured would take Terry and his boys at least a day to work through and by then they’d be well down the road. He hadn’t liked the predatory look he’d seen in Terry’s eyes the night before - he was the kind of asshole who would take your favorite toy away from you just to break it. They’d had a couple of run-ins in the past and he didn’t want him anywhere near Sam.

He smiled at the thought of the gentle mage. He’d seen him in action with the quarterstaff and knew he could strike with deadly force when necessary, but gentle was the still the first word he’d use to describe him. His hands, while large and skilled with weapons were also refined and his caresses deliberate and careful as if he was worried he’d accidentally break something with them. His smile was generous and the dimples that popped out were even more appealing when a soft blush bloomed in his cheeks. Dean shook his head and gave himself a mental kick. It wasn’t like this was his first man and yet thinking of Sam made him feel warm and definitely protective. The world could be a very rough place and Dean was determined to protect Sam from the worst parts of it or die trying. There was something in Sam’s childlike innocence that appealed to him in a way that was foreign, something that made him want be better, smarter and stronger than he’d ever been. That very same innocence made him believe he could do it.

“Hello the crossroad,” Sam called out as he spotted the hunter waiting for him. “Permission to stop?”

“You’d better, I brought breakfast and you’re shit out of luck if you pass me by,” Dean got to his feet and walked a few feet down the road to greet the mage and the pony. “I even brought a couple of apples for Bert.”

Sam guided the pony and cart out of the road and greeted his friend with a hug, “I’m glad you’re here and really glad you brought breakfast. We’ll have plenty of the priory protein bars during the trip it’ll be nice to start out with something better.” The mage watered the pony while Dean fed him his apples. “It’s about an eight day walk back to the Priory of Detroit but there are cabins spaced out approximately a day’s walk along the way….”

“Uh Sam, not sure you’ve thought this through,” Dean walked to the back of the cart and sat on the edge unpacking the food he brought, “I can’t be seen anywhere near a priory or near you. I’m wanted for book theft. They’re not just going to slap my wrist and let me walk away. We can’t go anywhere near a priory and if they see us together your plausible deniability is history, unless you turn me in.”

“I could leave you a half a day out and deliver their things and turn right around,” Sam wasn’t sure if any of the priories expected him to stay but there was nothing in his sentence that said he had to, “We’d move faster once I get some of these supplies off loaded.”

Dean handed Sam a honey cake hoping it might help sweeten his words, “We can’t, Sam. It’s too dangerous to go anywhere near the priories, I’m sorry,” he placed his hand on the cybernetic arm in an attempt to comfort the mage who was obviously conflicted.

“They’re depending on me, Dean. They gave me their trade goods trusting me to return with the supplies they need. It feels wrong,” Sam sat next to the hunter on the back of the cart and noticed he didn’t draw away when his cybernetic shoulder touched his, “I can see your point as well, it just……”

“I get it, Sam. I know the brotherhood is your family, much more so than the guild members are to me, but if we’re going to head out to this……library, let’s call it a library, that I found we’re going to need supplies and I can’t take you there if they take me into custody,” Dean really did feel the other man’s pain, but couldn’t risk being seen with him or near a priory. “You’ve said yourself new books haven’t been found in, well forever, right?” The mage nodded his assent, “Don’t you think the brotherhood would be overjoyed to have you make this discovery and bring it to light? Wouldn’t it be worth the cost of the supplies in the cart?”

“New books are invaluable,” Sam was still struggling with his conscience knowing that there was a risk the priories would be short supplies in the coming months. It felt to him like stealing from his brethren, even if it was to further their ultimate mission, “I’m torn. I didn’t choose my current position, but I don't feel like I can just abandon it either."

Dean handed his friend another cake and brushed his hair behind his ear, just to touch him, to offer some small demonstration of comfort, “I haven’t been fair in asking you to choose without seeing what you’re choosing so let’s head to the library and you can get a look at what I’m talking about and then if you feel like you need to finish your deliveries I’ll go with you and help you out. Hidden of course, but I’ll keep you company. Does that make this any easier for you at all?” The hunter didn’t want to cause distress for the man who was fast becoming the focus of his life, but he knew he needed to see what he’d found. He leaned toward Sam and pressed a soft kiss on his temple, “Take a few minutes to think about it, please…..for me?”

The mage licked the honey from his fingers, completely unaware of the effect he was having on the hunter, as he thought through Dean’s proposition. His argument was solid, Sam couldn’t really see much of a down side, things happened on the road all the time and a couple of weeks late would be better than never. Demon activity was always unpredictable. He’d had to lay up for a couple of days in the past when things got hot in order to protect himself and the supplies. This side trip would give him time to think through the rest of the equation and maybe this discovery would compensate for the loss of the supplies and trade goods. Besides, he thought, maybe there were things in the library that I could trade to replace any supplies we end up using.

Dean watched the mage carefully, trying to guess what was going through his mind while at the same time making his dick pay attention to him instead of the irresistible man licking his fingers next to him. Fuck! Did he have any idea what that was doing to him? No, he didn’t, he decided and he looked down at his boots and began cataloging demon types to get his mind off sex. His mind wandered back to the mage and decided if he didn’t speak soon he’d just kiss the answer out of him just to get his hands, mouth and dick on him.

“All right,” Sam looked to the side and then down at the ground to see what Dean was staring at so intently, “let’s go to your library. You’re right, I’ll be in a better position to make a decision that affects the brotherhood once I know what I’m dealing with…..are you OK?”

“Yeah…..I’m fine…..what?” Dean finally looked up and got caught in Sam’s gaze.

“I said you’re right,” Sam smiled still unaware of the discomfort he’d caused the hunter. “Let’s check this library out before I make a final decision. Which direction is it? I can check my maps and see if we can at least hit a few of the priory cabins so we don’t have to sleep in the cart every night.”

Dean found himself saying a silent prayer to that god he didn’t believe in anymore, and jumped off the back of the cart to look at the map and see if any of it made sense to him. Maybe by the end of the journey he’d be able to read a few more words but for the time being just getting to spend the next few weeks on the road alone with Sam was reward enough.

Once they’d decided on their direction they pulled the cart and pony back on the road and headed out hoping to make a priory cabin that night. They walked on either side of Bert and Sam gave the pony a quick little boost of will and energy so that they set off at a halfway decent speed. “So tell me, Dean, where did you grow up? Do you have family?”

It was almost full dark by the time they’d stopped at a priory cabin and were sitting down to eat the supper they’d been able to put together from the supplies in the cart. “You’ve been hunting alone since your dad disappeared, right? Don’t you get lonely?”

“Yes and no. Food’s good, thanks. I’m not much of a cook,” Dean was surprised at the meal the mage had been able to put together from seemingly nothing. He’d claim magic again, but he’d seen him do it, “I go out for a week or two at a time and then head to the nearest town or city with a Federation office and turn in my heads and collect my bounties. Then I can hang around in town if I need companionship or resupply and head out again. I don’t really think too much about being lonely. I’m usually on the trail of something or someone, fighting for my life or just glad to have a few minutes to catch my breath.”

“They taught us all to cook at the priory since we all take turns doing market duty or delivering supplies to other priories. Did you know that there are actually books about cooking? Lists of ingredients and directions called recipes. Another priory has a number of them. They’re not a priority for translation or research, but I think it would be interesting to see one,” Sam watched the other man closely still sure he was going to bolt at any minute. They were raised so very differently. “I talk about books too much, don’t I?”

Dean smiled at the mage, “No, not at all. I like hearing about them since they’re so important to you. I never really gave them much thought, well, ever before meeting you but I’m kind of curious to know if there are books about demons and the other things that took over. Like, are there different creatures in different areas and are certain weapons more effective than others. Having something like that would be like gold to hunters. It’s hard for me to imagine someone taking the time to write things down for someone else to read though. Why not just tell them?”

“What if they’re writing it down not just for their children but say for their children’s children? Tales that are passed by telling always change a little bit with each teller so that after a long period of time the tale may become completely different and possibly completely untrue.” Sam brought the kettle of beans back to the table and refilled Dean’s bowl without asking. “When you write things down for someone else to read every person who reads the text reads the same words and the facts don’t change.”

“So then they would always be true?” Dean sipped at his mead. He was sure they didn’t have an unlimited supply, but wished they did. He had grown used to the beverage while at the priory and liked it a lot.

“Not necessarily, if the writer didn’t know the truth or didn’t have all the facts then what he wrote would be his viewpoint. However, there are often many books on the same subject by different authors – writers – and by comparing the texts you can often decide what is closest to the truth. That’s where research comes in and research is sometimes really tedious,” Sam was thrilled to be able to share these details with someone who had never experienced the thrill of chasing down a fact through several texts. “But once you’ve compared your sources and find commonalities that can indicate the truth of the matter. It’s almost like finding a demon you’ve been hunting.”

Dean let the words run through his head as he tried to wrap his mind around the process. “But then in some cases, like the concealment device, someone has to figure out how to make it work, right?”

“Exactly! The priories and mages who study machinery and engineering are set up to experiment with what they find and perfect the devices until they work. Sometimes it takes the lifetime of several mages before something works as the texts say it should, but each new device brings new knowledge and techniques to those mages who build them. Are you finished?" Sam took Dean’s bowl at his assent and used a brush and minimal water to scrape them clean.

“You should let me do that,” Dean protested, but kind of liked being taken care of, he didn’t remember a time that he hadn’t had to care for himself. “You cooked after all.”

“I don’t mind, I’m used to doing it for myself - adding one more doesn’t make that much more work. You can take care of it all tomorrow if you insist,” Sam smiled at the other man’s brief grimace.

Dean rose, crossed the room, put his arms around Sam’s waist and drew him into an embrace, “How about I think up another way to pay you back and pull my weight? There are things I’m much, much better at than cooking and cleaning up.” He turned Sam around and pressed a line of open mouthed kisses across his collarbone and up his neck, nuzzling into the scruff that had grown over the last two days. He chuckled as he felt the younger man’s cock grow hard and long as he pressed himself into his groin. “Let me take care of you Sam,” he whispered into his mouth before capturing it in a searing kiss and swallowing the moans he’d evoked.

The mage put one hand on the back of the smaller man’s neck and the other cupped his ass as he drew him even nearer and moved his mouth down Dean’s neck to the sensitive skin at the juncture of his neck and shoulder. He bit lightly at the skin encouraged by Dean’s heavy breathing and the hard line of his cock that was pressing into his thigh.

‘Damn,’ Dean thought, ‘I’m supposed to be controlling this, shit!’ He broke away from Sam, smiling at the groan of disappointment that his frustrated partner made. “Let me take care of you Sam,” he’d backed him over to the bed and loosened the ties on his pants. He went to work on hardened nipples on Sam’s chest, sucking and biting as the other man whimpered in pleasure. He pushed the leather pants and his under garment down as he paid attention to each small nipple in turn, “Sit Sam.” His hands gently pushed the mage to the edge of the bed. Before Sam could protest the loss of the mouth on his nipples, Dean was on his knees pushing his thighs apart while caressing them. “Gods Sam, you……shit….you are…..” Dean’s mouth watered as he looked at the huge and leaking cock that had been revealed. He’d known Sam was big, he’d felt it, but seeing him erect was something else again. “Shit……so beautiful…..” he used one of his hands to steady the cock so he could lick up the underside along the throbbing vein causing the other man to choke back a couple of curse words. “You can talk dirty Sammy, I like it.” He continued to lick at Sam’s cock while his other hand caressed the heavy balls hanging behind it.

Sam couldn’t believe how gorgeous Dean looked on his knees holding and licking at his cock. He was sure he was going to come before he even pulled it into his mouth. It wasn’t his first blow job, but it was the first one that made him feel like he’d come before it even got started. “Gods Dean……that is…..you…..uhhhhhhh,” Sam closed his eyes and sucked in a huge breath while struggling to hold on. He opened his eyes as Dean took almost half his length into his mouth. “Fuck Dean……fuck….” the sight of the other man smiling around his dick nearly did him in.

Pleased by the younger man’s reaction, Dean tightened his hand around the base of the cock to control his orgasm, took him even deeper into his mouth and began swirling his tongue around the hard cock as he sucked at it a little harder. The sounds and curse words coming from Sam’s mouth made him even harder, but he ignored his own cock and continued to pay attention to the monster he was drawing to the back of his throat. He controlled his gag reflex and was able to take almost the whole thing. He knew Sam was close when he started to thrust into his mouth and he sucked even harder.

“Fuck Dean……that is so…..you are……amazing…..fuck, fuck…..I’m….” Sam felt Dean’s hand loosen up a little and he thrust one more time coming as he hit the back of Dean’s throat.

The hunter smiled again as he swallowed everything Sam pumped down his throat, he really was as sweet as he thought he’d be, as he nursed him through the last couple of thrusting aftershocks. He let the semi-hard cock slip from his mouth and kissed the mage slowly and thoroughly, letting him taste himself in his mouth before pulling back. “Thanks again for dinner, Sammy.”

Sam looked into the lust filled green eyes and almost groaned out loud again, this time out of frustration, he’d fumbled around at the priory with a couple of brothers and a sister, but he was way out of his league and didn’t really know what Dean expected in return or even how to approach it, “Dean……I…..”

“Shhhhh, it’s OK Sammy, I don’t expect anything from you,” Dean sat next to him on the bed and took one of his hands, “You are worth waiting for and no, I’ve never said that to another person.” He turned Sam’s face toward him and kissed him again, a softer, less demanding kiss.

“It’s not that I don’t want to Dean, I just……I’m not,” Sam was blushing furiously as he tried to explain his inexperience, “I’m not……I don’t. Dean I haven’t…..”

“It’s really OK, I didn’t think you had a lot of experience and I’m more than happy to teach you whatever you want to know at whatever pace you set. The one thing about being alone on the road so much, I can take care of myself when I have to,” Dean punctuated his words with kisses and eased Sam back onto the bed. “What needs to be done to secure this cabin besides banking the fire?”

“Nothing, I activated the concealment device after we got in, but Dean, it’s not that I don’t want to, I just, I’m just unsure.” Sam was still blushing and wanted to touch the hunter, to offer him release.

Dean banked the fire, turned the lamp off, slipped out of his clothes and crawled into the small bed next to the mage, “It’s all good Sam.” He pulled the other man close and put his head on his shoulder, “Let’s get some rest. Long walk tomorrow.” He kissed Sam gently and sighed as Sam pulled him closer and drew the covers over them. He realized he’d stopped thinking about the cybernetic arm as anything but a part of the man he was falling for as he fell asleep.


	9. Water

Sam awoke early, life in the priory started before dawn and his body was naturally conditioned to wake before the sun rose. Not wanting to disturb the sleeping hunter who was sprawled across his chest and leg, Sam closed his eyes and thought back to the previous night while very gently drawing symbols on the hunter’s back. He got hard again just thinking about Dean on his knees with his cock in his mouth. The pleasure he’d felt was unlike anything he’d ever experienced and he definitely wanted more, maybe more importantly, he knew he wanted to give Dean the same pleasure in return. The way he felt about the hunter was different than anything he’d ever felt about anyone or anything previously and he wanted to give this man anything he desired and planned to learn what he liked best.

The hunter smiled as he woke up, his head on the mage’s chest listening to the steady beat of his heart, the cadence of his breathing and the gentle touch of the amazing cybernetic hand on his back. One arm was thrown over his hip and the other tangled in his hair, his right leg on top of and holding down the mage’s left, his thigh making contact with the other man’s already hard cock. Not moving he allowed Sam to continue the gentle touches on his back while wishing he’d move farther down and caress his ass and thighs. He was still rock hard, leaking pre-come and wanted the mage more than ever but knew he’d have to let Sam set the pace. Dean was certain that being raised in a priory with no true contact outside of others in the brotherhood had sheltered the young man and he wanted everything they did together to be pleasurable and on Sam’s terms. He knew some of what he felt was still guilt at being the cause of Sam’s current situation, but he also knew that wasn’t the whole story and that he just wasn’t prepared to admit to himself exactly what he was feeling.

Opening his eyes, he looked up at Sam whose eyes were still closed with his head thrown back on the pillow bringing his neck and collar bones into high relief and nearly moaned out loud at the sight. Instead he decided he’d kiss, lick and suck his way to Sam’s neck before capturing his mouth and tongue, fucking him silly. Nipping lightly at the skin just under his mouth he was rewarded with a gasp from the mage followed by a more contented sigh as he licked and kissed the skin he’d assaulted. Moving his way slowly - very, very slowly up the broad and muscled chest he stopped and paid special attention to the small, hard nipples drawing groans and more sighs, each increasing in volume and length. He felt Sam starting to move his hips underneath him, struggling for more contact and friction on his own hard and leaking cock, “Not yet, Sammy,” he growled out, his voice still rough from sleep, “I’m not done making you mine.”

Sam was squirming underneath the hunter, desperate to grind his cock against him, desperate to kiss, suck or lick any part of him, but in his current position he could only watch as the hunter worked his way upwards at a snail’s pace pulling more sounds out of him than he thought it was possible to make. He was soon able to shift their positions enough using his hands on the hunter’s waist and his own legs so that Dean was laying on top of him, their cocks touching. He was rewarded with Dean’s gasp of pleasure when their cock’s first made contact and he watched as the hunter fought to remain in control. He moved his left hand over to cup Dean’s ass and used his right to pull his head back so he could get a good look at the freckled face and pouty, sensuous lips, “Two can play your game hunter, I may be inexperienced, but have always been a quick study,” Sam then lowered his mouth to the other man’s neck and alternately bit, licked and kissed at a spot near his shoulder gratified by the increasingly loud cursing and moans he was able to elicit from the hunter.

‘Gods,’ Dean thought, ‘he’s going to kill me, he’s fucking going to kill me. No one should be this sweet and this fucking sexy.’ The hunter worked his own mouth up from the mage’s neck and found his mouth. He began with feather light kisses across it which caused Sam to gasp. Once his lips opened, Dean thrust his tongue forward and claimed the younger man’s mouth as his own. He broke the kiss briefly, “you like this right? This feels good?” Curious, but also wanting to goad the younger man just a bit, at the same time he increased the pressure on his cock and started moving a bit faster, their pre-come mixing and providing enough liquid that their cock’s slid easily against each other.

Sam moved both hands to Dean’s hips and held him still as he thrust up against his cock and his stomach, moaning at the combination of feelings that was washing over him. Pleased that Dean seemed to be almost as out of control as he was, judging by the grunts and moans of pleasure he was making as well as the jerking of his hips in his hands. He knew he wasn’t going to last much longer under the sensory overload Dean was providing. Sam broke the kiss to pant in Dean’s ear, “so good Dean, so, so good, please…..”

“Please what, Sammy? Let you come? Do you want to come for me?” Dean pressed himself down and thrust harder against Sam’s granite cock, “It’s OK, Sammy. I want you to come, come just for me. Want to feel you spill against me, come for me, Sam.” Dean bit down on Sam’s shoulder and sucked and licked the reddened skin hoping to leave a mark.

Hearing Dean asking him to come was unbelievably hot and Sam wasted no time, increasing both the speed and strength of his thrusts until he was coming as requested - crying Dean’s name in between his panting breaths.

The abandon on the face of his partner combined with the bursts of hot come against his cock and belly had Dean coming seconds after the mage. “Gods, Sammy, you’re so good, so so good. You feel amazing,” he panted in the younger man’s ear as he continued sliding their cocks together to work through their aftershocks. “You are so special, so gorgeous, so wanton, so incredibly sexy….”

“You make me feel so good, I didn’t,” Sam broke off as Dean kissed him deeply again, “didn’t know……”

“It’s different with someone else, right?” the hunter continued to kiss Sam on the mouth the cheeks, the chin and across his cheekbones, “better, right? I want you to feel good. I’ll make you feel so good, Sammy, never going to hurt you, just make it all good.” They were finally still and now facing each other on the small bed. “You make me feel so good.”

Unsure of how to respond, Sam returned the kisses he was receiving and held the hunter close, unbothered by the come drying on their bellies. He finally worked his way to one of Dean’s ears and whispered, “Whatever you want Dean, just tell me - want to give you everything.”

___________________________________________________

Too soon they were back on the road and heading toward the “library” Dean had discovered. They were going to have to get close to a town the next day so they could trade for some more water. The blasted lands had almost none to offer and what could be found was usually still contaminated from the demon wars and undrinkable without treatment. The only water that remained uncontaminated was from deep wells and most towns and cities were built around one or more, but the fresh water came at a price. In order to be near enough to the town the next day they would have to spend the night in the cart as there were no priory cabins in the vicinity of the small town of Carolton, it wasn’t large enough to have a regular market day and its residents generally traveled to larger towns to trade.

“We should be able to get a good amount of water at Carolton. They don’t see priory made items that often and despite the rumors and fear surrounding the priories everyone likes their trade goods,” Sam explained to Dean as they walked, “you can take some of the silk and some of the beeswax candles in and I’m sure they’ll be happy to send you back with full water skins.”

“Why me, you’re the techno-mage, I think they’d be more willing to trade with a mage who’d acquired the goods honestly than a hunter who stole them after he killed the mage carrying them,” the hunter had no problem going into town, but wasn’t sure why Sam was reluctant considering trading was one of the things he’d been assigned to do for the next year. “Besides, I don’t really know the value of what you’re sending me with, they’d take advantage of me before they would you.”

Sam thought about his answer for a few minutes as they walked, he didn’t want to offend the hunter or be unnecessarily cruel, “I can see where you’d think that would be the case, but unfortunately some less honorable hunters have worked deals in some of the smaller towns, towns where the residents struggle to even feed themselves at times. These deals are like an extension of your bounty system. If a mage has to stop and trade at a town without a large market or occasionally at a larger city outside of dedicated market days, you know, where there is no neutral ground, no large gathering of people, they could run into certain individuals in the town who may be in the employ of a hunter, or a small gang of hunters. They capture the mage and then the hunters come and take his head. The townspeople get to keep the trade goods and a couple of crowns for their trouble. Sadly we’ve learned this through trial and error and now steer clear of the smaller towns whenever possible.” He glanced over at the hunter who looked like he was battling with his rage. “I don’t think it happens very often anymore since we’ve stopped trading at the small towns,” Sam offered in consolation for having to share the story.

“That’s just…….just…..so fucking wrong!” Dean sputtered, “If you can’t make your bounty without relying on civilians for help you should get your ass out of hunting. I mean, sure sometimes for some of the bigger game or a big fucking band of demons several hunters may work together to eliminate the threat, but using fucking civilians to fucking trap bounty for you is beyond low, it’s….it’s demon-like! I’ve never done that Sam, any mages I got were given a fighting chance. Fuck I don’t know how you can even stand me….”

“I’m not accusing you of anything, Dean. I just wanted to explain why it’s better if you go into Carolton and trade for water.” Sam felt bad that he’d made the hunter so angry. He knew he wasn’t angry at him, but he hated he’d had to tell him something that hurt him. “You get kind of used to things like that if you’re a techno-mage cyborg long enough.”

The hunter was beyond pissed. His father and uncle had both been hunters and they’d taught him that there was honor in being a hunter, honor in bearing the twin katanas and honor in the bounty system by which they’d made their living. There were vows they took when they were recognized by the Federation and the Guild after they earned their swords and just knowing that other hunters worked their bounties like this made him feel unclean and at the same time made a mockery of the vows he lived his life by. “I know you weren’t making an accusation, Sam. I had heard rumors too, but no one ever confirmed anything, so I dismissed them. I couldn’t believe any hunter worth his swords would be that fucking dishonorable. It makes me fucking sick and I swear to you, if I ever find out that a fucking loser of a hunter worked that way, I’ll make him regret it. Not just for the techno-mages, but for other hunters as well.”

They walked in silence for a while, not uncomfortable silence, but companionable silence, silence that let each man just draw comfort from the presence of the other without having to say so out loud. They took a short break mid-morning to relieve themselves, water the pony and eat. Sam was securing their things in the cart in preparation for continuing on when Dean approached and caught him in an almost rib crushing hug. Sam hugged back and waited for the hunter to release him or speak, kissing him lightly on his forehead.

When Dean finally spoke, it was almost a whisper, “I’ve told you I don’t believe in a god and never really have, but I found myself thinking that I was pretty lucky that something or someone intervened that day, and that I was in such bad shape when you came across me or I might have taken your head.” Dean shook his own head at the thought. “It still bothers me that I would have done that without fucking thinking twice,” his voice trailed off as he got to the end of the sentence, “and you…..you didn’t leave me there to die.” After a half a minute or so, Dean broke out of the embrace and headed around to the front of the cart to get Bert moving again, “Come on Sam, let’s get as close as we can today without putting ourselves in danger and I’ll go and do the trading.”

Sam extended his stride and moved to the front of the cart as well, smiling to himself as he remembered the feeling of holding the hunter in his arms. He had been surprised by the embrace, he’d suspected that the hunter wasn’t comfortable with feelings beyond the most superficial ones and felt hopeful that he could help him realize that the feelings that come from the depths of a person’s soul were the ones that could change the way a person viewed the world, the ones that could make a difference.


	10. Gone

Brother Samuel watched the hunter walk off toward Carolton on his mission to trade for water. They’d found a small stand of scrub trees where they’d camped the night before and where Sam would wait for Dean’s return. While the hunter was gone Sam decided to repack the cart to make the things they used daily a little more accessible and to better balance the load in order to keep the pony sound. He felt pretty safe where they’d made camp and had Bert out of the traces and the cart’s contents spread around him as he worked.

“See Terry, I told you Winchester was traveling with a fucking techno-mage,” Bruce was excited to finally be vindicated in his belief that a hunter and a mage had hooked up. “Look at his arm, he’s a fucking giant cyborg.”

The gang of four was near enough to see the mage, but far enough away to not be heard behind the boulder they were using for cover. “Yeah, yeah Bruce, you’ve finally made a decent contribution. It looks like he’s carrying a shit ton of supplies as well. Wonder what Winchester would pay to get him back? Think it’d be better than the bounty on his head?” 

“Good thinking, Kevin,” said Terry. “I wonder how hard it’d be to take him alive and leave Winchester a ransom demand? You can write Andy, right? Hopefully that fucking idiot Winchester can read. If we held him captive we could have some fun, he is really pretty and I bet being from a priory he’d beg really nicely for us. Think he’s still a virgin?”

“But where would we take him? We don’t have a place anywhere near here and the guy’s fucking big enough that transporting him far will be a butt load of trouble,” Bruce mused out loud.

“You are such a fucking moron,” Andy slapped Bruce on the back of his head, “he’s got a fucking cart and pony! We knock the fucker out, tie him up and throw him in the cart. Let his animal do the hauling for us.”

The gang thought about their situation for a few minutes before Bruce decided to go for broke. “But that still doesn’t solve where to take him, does it moron? Plus no way that pony hauls the mage and all the goods with any kind of speed, Winchester would be on us before the day was out.”

“I hate to say it, but Bruce might actually have a working brain cell.” Terry paced back and forth as he pondered their predicament. “I however, have more. Think boys, we’ve all heard rumors that the mage’s keep hidden cabins all over the shit hole blasted lands for their traveling freaks, right? We knock him out, get him secured, and I mean secure the shit out of him, and force him to reveal the location of one of their hideaways…..we can threaten Winchester, they looked pretty cozy the other night. This just might work. Now here’s the plan…..”

_____________________________________________________

Dean returned to their campsite exhausted. Trading for the water they needed had taken him a lot longer than he’d anticipated. The townspeople were reluctant to trade with a stranger, a hunter no less and it took a lot of talking to finally get the water. He hurried back to the campsite loaded down with freshly filled water skins concerned that they wouldn’t make the priory cabin that night. Sam had shown him on the maps he carried what the mark for a priory house was and explained the compass rose on the top that oriented the map to the north. He knew the closest cabin was about 6 hours walk at Bert’s pace. Dean pushed himself as hard as he could to get back so he could share the details with Sam and get on the road. He also bought a couple of meat pies and apples that they could eat while traveling to avoid another stop. 

“Sam, heads up, you can bring the cart back,” Dean called out as he got close to the trees, concerned when he didn’t get a greeting in return he picked up his pace to a slow jog, “Sam! Are you all right? Not funny! Where the hell are you?”

When he arrived at the small stand of trees, Dean looked around in horror. The supplies and their belongings were strewn all over the site and Sam, Bert and the cart were gone. He dropped the water skins and tried to read the signs of struggle. He talked to himself as he worked through the debris. “At least three, maybe four? You fought hard didn’t you Sammy? That’s my boy.” He moved carefully through the site looking for anything out of the ordinary. There was blood spatter and some blood on the quarterstaff so he figured Sam had gotten a hit on at least one of them. He prayed to that god he didn’t believe in that it wasn’t Sam’s blood, “Well, let’s see what they left,” he muttered as he sorted through the items they’d chosen to leave behind. “Sugar, flour, mead – surprised they didn’t take that – honey, all the heavier items... Shit, Sam’s probably unconscious and they’re using the cart to transport him. But who? Hunters would have just taken his head….” 

One of the bottles of mead had broken and Dean moved the larger pieces aside so he didn’t end up stepping on them and spotted the corner of a parchment under a flour sack. He worked the parchment free and sat down to see what he’d found. As he sat his eyes glanced upward and he saw Sam’s knife sticking in one of the tree trunks pinning another piece of parchment to the bark. He grabbed the knife which he stuck in his boot and the page which was covered with writing.

“God damn it! I can’t fucking read more than a few fucking words,” Dean cursed himself for being such a poor student. Reading had never really mattered to him and now Sam’s life could depend on whatever was written on the parchment, “Fuck me,” he kicked the tree in frustration. He could clearly see where the cart had returned to the road and it was moving away from the city. It was impossible to tell how long Sam had been gone. As he finished repacking their belongings he felt a hard package at the bottom of his pack. He dug everything out again and found the pouch of crowns Sam had been given by his priory. Dean went back to thanking his absent god and headed back to Carolton at an all-out run. He’d seen a church, a preacher would be able to read him the note and there was a small stable where he hoped he could trade the crowns and his knives if he had to, for a horse.  
________________________________________________________________________

Sam came to as he was being slapped awake. His head hurt, he was nauseated, his chest and right arm hurt and he couldn’t move. He struggled to remember what had happened while someone was shouting at him to wake up and continuing to slap his face.

“Stop it Terry, he’s awake, don’t put him out again,” Kevin grabbed Terry’s arm on an upswing. “His eyes are open.”

Terry looked over their prize who was tied to the cart using every piece of rope they could find as well as strips from his own cloak. The last also functioned as a gag; everyone knew if you allowed a mage to speak they would change you into an insect or an animal rather than speak to you. He watched their prisoner’s eyes dart back and forth rapidly as he studied the men surrounding the cart, “OK boys, two of you on his legs and Kevin, you lay on that weird arm while I talk to our guest.”

“Be careful Terry,” cautioned Bruce, “don’t let him spell us!”

“He won’t, will you, mage-scum? Our other friend will have jumped your boyfriend Winchester by now and will have him secured and ready to play with,” Terry cackled as he spoke using his knife to demonstrate just how they might want to play with Dean, “I’ve always hated that asshole Winchester and I’d love to see him scream and beg for his own death.” He lowered himself so that he could speak directly into one of Sam’s ears, “You wouldn’t want your boyfriend to suffer because you wouldn’t cooperate with our very simple requests, right baby mage?”

Sam shook his head no, he wasn’t sure Dean would have ever been caught unaware, but he wasn’t going to risk anything until he had a ghost of a chance at getting away. He hoped to hell that Dean found the map he’d shoved out of the way in the fight and the crowns he’d already put into his pack before he was jumped.

“That’s a good fuck toy, if we don’t meet up with our friend tonight he will begin to slice off pieces of your pretty boyfriend until we do. You won’t fucking recognize him once he’s done cutting so be a good toy when I remove this gag and answer our questions. You’re going to pay the price regardless, but you can spare Winchester’s hide if you play nice.” Terry loosened the gag and pulled it down so Sam could speak.

“W…w…water?” his mouth and throat were dry and he could barely speak.

“Bruce, water the fuck toy,” Terry moved aside as Bruce threw some water on Sam’s face, “that’s enough, don’t make him too comfortable. So fuck toy, we know that you magic scum suckers have secret places where you hide, where’s the closest one and don’t fucking try to lie to me. I can read.”

“Map, get me a map,” Sam sent a prayer up to Jobs Gates that Dean remembered how to read the map he left behind, “it’s easier to show you.”

“Andy, where’s that bunch of maps you took? Bring it here,” Terry leered at his captive, “you better be right about this mage - wait, maybe I hope you’re wrong and you misdirect us so that Winchester gets worked over while we take our time with you. What do you think boys?”

The three other guys cheered and Andy handed over the maps, “Which one fuck toy? I’ll hold them up and you nod or shake your head yes or no, got it? I don’t what you talking more than you have to.”

Sam nodded his head. His mind was barely on the maps the hunter was holding up, at least they hadn’t beheaded him right away and Dean had half a chance to find him. He had to believe they hadn’t gotten hold of him, there was no way Dean would have let that happen even if there was a fifth piece of shit member of the gang. He shook his head no until they got to the last map in the stack.

“I thought I was going to have to beat you a little more, mage. Maybe I will anyway for taking so long to nod,” Terry grinned at the bound mage, enjoying the way the ropes were digging into his muscle and skin, “a few more bruises to mar that perfect skin, what do you think boys?” The other three giggled like little girls at the thought of more violence, “OK fuck toy, where on the map? Use your index finger, the real one, and motion the correct direction. East, OK how many hours - you know this lazy pony’s top speed - how long if we beat him to keep him going? Use your finger to count the hours,” Terry grabbed a handful of Sam’s hair and lifted his head slightly. “Don’t forget pretty fuck toy, your boyfriend’s life depends on you being honest with us.”

Sam counted out the five hours he knew it would take to get to the house marked on the map he left Dean. The map the fuckers were showing him was not the right one but he’d get them to the same the spot he was sending Dean. He prayed again that Dean would make it there faster and remembered how to deactivate the concealment device. He didn’t for one minute believe they had his hunter. Between the hair pulling and his already aching head his eyes started to water and he shed a couple of tears, much to the delight of his captors.

“Look Terry, the baby is crying! I wonder if he’ll cry the first time we fuck him. Are you still a virgin baby mage or has Winchester already taken that from you? Answer me!” Kevin cracked Sam’s head against the floor of the cart, “answer me, damn you!”

Sam, eyes still watering and head pounding even harder grit his teeth and growled, “I gave him everything already and he’s a better man than the four of you put together!”

The four howled with laughter again and bet each other who would make the mage cry first when they raped him, the odds were on Terry since he was the meanest of the group, but Bruce had the biggest cock and if anything could make a man cry it was him plunging in with only a little spit to slick him up. Andy retied Sam’s gag, but not before kissing him, pinching the skin on his jaw to make him open his mouth, “more of that later. I can’t wait to watch you suck my cock with those pretty lips, tears in your eyes, hands tied behind your back. You’ll cry one way or the other and wish you’d never hooked up with Winchester.”

____________________________________________________

Dean made it back to Carolton in record time and staggered into the church startling the pastor who was tidying up the altar. “Father, I need help, please can you help me?”

“What’s troubling you friend? I’m sure the almighty can help ease your mind,” the pastor gestured for Dean to have a seat but he was too worked up and paced in front of the altar.

“I’m afraid the help I need is more of a worldly variety than it is godly. I……I…..can’t read and they’ve taken my friend,” he held the note out to the other man with a shaking hand. “Would you read this to me, please? I can pay you.”

The pastor took the page and scanned the poorly written note quickly, “Yes, son I will read this to you, although I’m afraid it will not bring you much comfort.”

“Thank you, Father, thank you! How many crowns do you want?” Dean dug in his inner jacket pocket for the bag of coins.

“Nothing so secular my friend, I would consider myself compensated if you would raise a prayer to the almighty in thanks, once your friend is safe again. Will you do that?”

Dean wanted to hug the other man, but restrained himself. “Yes, yes anything! I’ve got to find Sam before…..before….they…..”

“I know son. Here’s what the note says, listen carefully so you’ll remember. ‘Winceater, we got ur fock toy. Hes purty n we wanna play. If u find ‘em in a day and givs us five munnies we givs him bac. Wots left. Tery’ these are desperate men indeed, be careful son. I will pray for your success and I ask you to remember your promise.”

“Thank you! I can never repay you, but I’ll pray Father, I promise I’ll pray. I have to go, but thank you,” Dean walked quickly out of the church and broke into a run once he hit the doors. He didn’t stop until he was at the stable securing a ride.

He was soon headed out of Carolton on a large bay gelding who was well muscled and seemed to be sound. He’d gotten him for 5 crowns and a couple of his knives got him the saddle and bridle. He knew he’d been taken, but didn’t want to spend the time required to dicker with the livery man over the price. He stopped at their campsite and collected as many of their things as he could fit in the saddle bags and his pack. He pulled out the map he’d found, fairly certain Sam had left it for him and broken the mead bottle to call his attention to its hiding place. It was the same map they had looked at the previous day. ‘Just yesterday,’ he thought, ‘seems like a week ago now. East, the cabin is east, I can do that.’ He made sure he had the water and debated about taking Sam’s quarterstaff but decided the horse, Balthazar or Balto for short, didn’t need the extra weight, he wanted speed. He’d be able to ride a couple for hours before it was too dark to continue without getting lost. He knew nothing about navigating at night, but would be up and on the road again at first light. After a final look around Dean mounted his horse and took off eastward hoping Sam could hold out until he arrived, this time when he prayed for speed and direction his prayer had a little more belief behind it.


	11. Pain

There was still about an hour of daylight left when the gang and their prisoner spotted the cabin in the distance. Sam had been pretending to be unconscious, which wasn’t hard since his eyes were almost swollen shut, and he hoped that Dean had turned off the concealment device rather than another mage. He didn’t want anyone else to fall prey to these desperate and depraved men. They’d poked at and beaten him as they traveled, just to have something to relieve their boredom and he hurt all over. Andy, who he’d struck with his staff was particularly vicious and was intent on messing up his ‘pretty face’. He’d vomited a couple of times from the pain and the motion of the cart which had pissed Terry off and they let him lay in his own mess which was uncomfortable and unpleasant. He had to pee but knew it would be useless to ask to stop, so he concentrated on anything other than the pressure in his bladder fairly certain that a well-placed punch would make him wet himself and that his tormentors would be happy to make sure that he did just that.

“Well mage, at least you didn’t lie to us about the location of your rest stop,” Terry poked Sam in several of the already livid bruises on his side. “Not that it will stop us from playing with you after we get settled, right guys?”

The other men laughed and slapped, poked or hit their helpless prisoner, “Right Terry, we didn’t say Winchester would be getting him back in one piece!”

“All right boys, we’ll play with him after we get settled. Bruce you and Andy take a look around and make sure there’s no sign of that fucker Winchester or anyone else. Me and Kevin will check the cabin and take care of anyone else who might get in the way and then get the gear unloaded. Once you’re back we’ll get the fucking mage off of his back and onto his knees,” Terry looked down at Sam and grabbed him between the legs, “Feels like he’s got a cock and a half and then some. This should be fun!”

Sam wanted to draw away from the groping hand, but was tied down too tightly and didn’t want to give away the fact that he was awake. He hoped that they’d get careless and that he could land a solid hit on at least one of the two who tried to get him up. While he’d always known that hunters would take his head if he wasn’t careful, he’d never been told that there were some who would need to torture their victims first. The thought of these men touching him, raping him, made him sick and he struggled to keep from vomiting yet again as he waited for his chance to get away or die trying.

Terry and Kevin surprised the unsuspecting techno-mage who was using the cabin that night and although he put up a pretty good fight they’d been able to overpower and kill him without too much effort. They dragged his body out to the stable area and beheaded him with a swipe of the sword.   
“Looks like we got ourselves a bounty and a ransom,” Terry chortled holding up the severed head, “combine that with our games tonight and it’s been a good week all around. Let’s get the gear in so we can tackle the giant fuck toy when the others return.”

Once Bruce and Andy returned with the news that it was all clear in a ½ mile radius around the cabin the four returned to the cart to get Sam. They each took charge of an appendage and set to releasing them one by one, “Kevin, get some water and see if you can wake this fucker up. It’ll be a lot easier if can bear some of his own weight,” Terry ordered as he worked on the bindings around Sam’s chest. Once those were loosened they’d do his feet then his arms and see if they could get him to stand on his own.

Kevin returned with a water skin, loosened the gag and set to soaking Sam’s face and hair. He sputtered as some of the water made its way down his throat and gagged him, “Sssssstop, I’m up.”

“All right baby mage this is how we’re going to work it,” Terry grabbed Sam roughly by the cheeks and turned his head to face him. “You’ve got one of us at each limb, we’re all armed and we won’t hesitate to take another one off for you if you give any trouble. Understood?”

“Yes,” the reply was nearly a whisper and Terry was anxious to see how long and hard he could get the techno-freak to scream. He was certain the pretty young man would make beautiful noises as his body was desecrated and he got hard just thinking about it.

“OK, Bruce you first, release his leg then lay on it holding him down. Next Andy, then I’ll release this arm. Kevin you’ll release the monster arm last. You and I will then sit him up and you can wrench it behind his back. I think he’s weak enough from thirst and pain that we’ll get him inside without too many problems. Besides, he doesn’t want his boyfriend Winchester to suffer because of his stupidity. Right fuck toy?”

Sam didn’t make a sound and concentrated on marshaling any strength he had remaining. If he could get one of them off of him he thought he might be able to shake at least one more asshole loose and get a couple of hits in. He felt pins and needles in his legs as his bonds were released and knew he’d be lucky to hold himself up, much less kick free of a hold. He prayed Dean would figure out where he was and find a way to get there quickly.

“All right, Kevin, are you ready?” Terry threw himself on Sam’s right arm and elbowed him in the gut hoping to distract him from the movements on his left side.

Kevin nodded the affirmative and set about loosening the ropes that held the cybernetic arm, “On three Terry, one……two……three!” Kevin and Terry pulled the mage up using his arms and Kevin was easily able to pin his cybernetic arm behind his back. 

Sam was dizzy, sick and in incredible pain as they hauled him up and didn’t have the strength left to fight them off. He was lucky he wasn’t puking again, the blow to his midsection took his breath away and he was gagging trying to get it back and keep from vomiting while wetting himself.

“Come on, fuckhead; let’s get you to your feet. Fuck you’re a huge mother-fucker aren’t you? Still gonna make you cry for your mama big guy, have no fear,” Terry kept up a continuous patter of insults and taunts as they slid Sam down to the foot of the cart and pushed and pulled him to his feet. He willed his knees to go weak and slumped to the ground.

“God damn it you stupid piece of shit, get to your feet,” Andy was kicking at the mage’s left ass cheek trying to get him to move while the others pulled on his right arm and Kevin pushed from behind. He was soon standing again.

Terry was furious and twisted the already bruised and possibly broken right arm he was holding, “Try something like that again and we’ll cut you, not enough to kill but enough to hurt and scar, understand asshole?”

Sam nodded weakly and assessed his position. He hurt and he could barely see out of his swollen eyes. He was dizzy, if they hadn’t been holding him, he’d have gone down again; he was also hungry, thirsty and scared. Lastly he was ashamed of having been caught and worried that Dean would walk into a trap, he prayed again to Jobs Gates, but this time it was to let him die before his tormentors could do anything else to him or to Dean.

______________________________________________________

Dean cursed as he rubbed down and fed his tired horse. It had gotten dark way, way too quickly and there was no moon to provide any ambient light so he’d stopped after about two and a half hours of hard riding. He realistically knew it was wiser to rest until dawn but wanted to keep going, however he was tired and even if he didn’t sleep the horse needed the rest since he planned to push him hard again the next day. He’d stopped when he found a boulder formation that would keep them both screened from the road, but still didn’t light a fire. Instead he pulled Sam’s spare cloak out of the saddle bag and wrapped it around himself reveling in both its warmth and its scent of Sam.

“I’ll kill them, I’ll kill them all when we find them,” Dean spoke out loud, the horse flicked his ears toward the sound, “that’s right Balto, we’re going to take them down and so help me god I will give them back sevenfold everything they did to Sam. The mother-fuckers don’t deserve to live and they sure as hell don’t deserve mercy.” He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back against one of the still sun-warm boulders and thought about Sam.

Once they got Sam into the cabin they stripped him of his clothes and tied his hands and feet and then hung the rope over a rafter so that his toes barely touched the ground and although he’d already wet himself once he couldn’t stop from urinating as he hung naked in front of his captors.

“God’s he’s gorgeous, but disgusting,” Kevin slapped him hard enough on his ass that he swung back and forth from the rafter. The movement tore at the muscles in his shoulders and caused tears to run down his face. “Look, he’s already crying! I guess all bets are off on who makes him cry first while we fuck him.” The other’s laughed and took turns hitting his ass trying to increase the radius of the arc as he swung and to see if they could get him to make a sound.

“Come on assholes, let’s get things set up and then we can take turns making this fuck toy into a man. I’m sure Winchester will appreciate us loosening up his hole for him and even if he doesn’t, we’ll have fun doing it,” Terry set his boys to stabling the pony, no sense in abusing it further, they might still need him and bringing in some supplies from the cart so they could eat and more importantly, drink while they enjoyed their prize.

Bruce made a point of body checking the young mage every time he passed his position making sure he twisted as well as swung to and fro. Sam’s muscles were screaming from bearing his weight and adjusting to the constant movement. The gang had tried to amputate his cybernetic arm at the shoulder before they strung him up but without success. The integration of flesh and machinery made it very difficult, nearly impossible to remove one, and blood was running down his left side, a small pool forming at his feet. He could barely think, his head was pounding, he was still nauseated and he hurt so fucking much. He just let the tears flow, past caring what his captors thought or said. He decided Dean wasn’t coming, why would he risk himself for a mage, even one he was attracted to? There were plenty of pretty men out there who would be glad to be with the hunter and none of them would be carrying the double stigma of techno-mage cyborg. He was resigned to his fate and prayed that he’d pass out, at least for a little while.

The dinner break went by way too quickly from Sam’s point of view and they were soon releasing his arms. He fell to his knees and would have collapsed if two of the four hadn’t caught him under his arms, “I don’t think he’s very happy to be tonight’s entertainment boys. I guess we should show him what he’s been missing hiding with the rest of the fucking techno-mages.”

The gang was laughing as they dragged Sam over to a chair and draped his chest over it, securing his hands and knees to the legs of the chair, this way they figured, they didn’t have worry if Sam couldn’t hold his own weight, he’d be open at either side for whatever they wanted.

“So who goes first? I don’t mind,” Kevin was grinning as he dropped his pants and pulled Sam’s head up by his hair, “It’s a big one isn’t it baby fuck toy, even if Winchester has taken your virginity he couldn’t possibly be as good as the four of us will be!”

Terry pushed Kevin out of the way, “I get his asshole first, I’m the leader the rest of you can fight over his mouth while I fuck the crap out of his ass,” he leaned down and pulled up Sam’s head to look him in the eyes, “no biting or we cut you, you swallow whatever we give you and if you puke it up, you clean it up with your tongue. Understand the basic rules of being a fuck toy?” He dropped Sam’s head, not even waiting for an answer and positioned himself behind him as he dropped his pants. He too was hard and ready to go.

“Because I am the nicest and I don’t think Winchester’s touched you much less fucked you, I’ll warm you up before I split you apart,” Terry spit on his fingers and pushed two of them roughly into Sam’s ass causing him to cry out in surprise and pain, “I knew he hadn’t touched you baby mage, he’s too fucking honorable and too much of a pussy himself.” He continued to jam his fingers in and out as he talked, “I’m pretty fucking sure he’s a bottom all the way, his asshole is probably gaping!”

The other three were still fighting over who would fuck Sam’s mouth first and he felt disassociated from the activities his body was being subject to, like he was a spectator at his own rape which was bizarrely surreal. He breathed a sigh of relief as the intruding fingers were withdrawn, but knew the relief would be temporary at best. ‘Shit,’ he thought as the fighting stopped and prepared himself to be violated at both ends.

Terry lined his cock up with the hole he’d been working and pushed himself inside without any warning; using just Sam’s blood as lube causing him to cry out in pain. Bruce, who won first right at his mouth was ready and pushed his huge, leaking cock into the conveniently open mouth effectively muffling the cries Sam was making as Terry jammed his cock all the way inside and began to pump in and out.

Sam’s mouth was stretched around the cock in his mouth and he almost looked like he was smiling, causing Kevin to decide he was having too much fun. He got a length of the rope they had used to hang him from the rafters and began to beat him in time with the thrusts of the two fucking him. Terry came quickly and Andy took his place. He wasn’t as wide as Terry but was longer. He was able to slide in much easier with Terry’s come providing the lube. Bruce came, after cutting off Sam’s breath and he had trouble swallowing the entire load and some dribbled out of the sides of his mouth. This pleased Bruce to no end and he smeared the extra over Sam’s face before slipping his softening cock out of his mouth to make room for another.

His rape seemed to go on forever. Sam lost count of how many times each man had used him and just accepted each new cock without complaint certain that they’d have to stop at some point and just leave him be. He felt sticky and dirty, and he was horrified that he’d actually gotten hard and come once, which had delighted his torturers and had them each trying to get him to come again.

The four were passing a bottle of whiskey between them and staring at the violated man still tied to the chair. He was covered in come and blood and no one was sure if he was still conscious. He was breathing, they made sure they didn’t kill them, Winchester wouldn’t pay for a dead fuck toy after all, but he’d pay for a well-used one. Terry finally decided they’d had enough for one night, he really didn’t want to kill the young mage, yet, and had Bruce and Andy tie him back to the rafter so he was out of the way. He could piss, bleed and leak come in the corner of the room. They could use him again in the morning while they waited for Winchester to catch up.

Sam had never felt more humiliated and he’d lived his life as a techno-mage cyborg. He couldn’t even cry anymore, his eyes were swollen completely shut. He could feel the fluids draining from his body and he felt sick. He now hoped Dean wasn’t coming for him, he didn’t want the hunter to see what he’d been reduced to by the animals that had captured him. He concentrated on his will hoping it was possible to will himself to death.


	12. Rescue

Dean rose at first light and rode hard, apologizing to Balto as he ran, “I’m sorry boy, I have to get to Sam, I promise you the best feed I can buy and some sugar, just get me to Sam.” They had ridden for 2 hours with only a couple of brief stops for water when Dean spotted smoke from a fire in the distance. He was fairly sure it had to be the cabin marked on the map and slowed the horse to a rough trot, not wanting the sound of beating hooves to carry. They stopped in a copse of small trees and shrubs about a mile from where he thought he’d find the cabin. He approached the cabin on foot slowly, but silently, on alert for anyone’s presence the closer he came. He was able to catch Bruce completely unaware as he was taking a leak and slit his throat efficiently and more importantly soundlessly, before moving in even closer.

He sensed the other man before he saw him, Andy was rummaging through the cart looking for something they could eat before continuing to abuse the captive mage. He was caught unaware as he moved around the stable area and Dean got him in a chokehold with a knife to his throat, “How many? How many more?” Dean whispered, his mouth on the other man’s ear, “tap out the number, don’t speak, you’ll drop before you make a sound.”  
Andy cursed at his predicament and figured he was going to die no matter what he did and so he yelled, “Terry!” He drowned in his own blood as Dean’s knife made short work of his neck and throat, but he’d sent up an alarm.

“Fuck you, asshole,” Dean growled as he kicked at the corpse at his feet. He hoped that just maybe the others hadn’t heard the dying man’s last word. He pressed himself flat against the back of the stable which was shadowed and waited to see if anyone appeared.

“Terry! Did you hear that?” Kevin looked out the door, searching the area for anything that seemed amiss. “I could have sworn I heard your name.”

“Yeah, I heard something too. Go check on the fucking pony and see if someone’s messing with him. I’ll stay here and guard our prize. We don’t want to lose him now.”

Dean watched from the shadows as a large man approached the stable, he threw a rock off to the other side and the stupid ape fell for it and headed off in the other direction.

“Come on Sammy, hang in there just a little longer,” Dean muttered under his breath as he moved slowly around the cabin hoping to catch whoever was left inside off guard since he’d be expecting his other men to return. He soundlessly drew Honor and Courage before stepping around to the front of the cabin.

Terry who had been standing in the doorway heard someone step behind him and figured it was Bruce or Andy returning, “Good, you can help me get the fuck toy down and back into position for some more fun.”

“I’d watch how you talk about my friend, asshole,” Dean the point of his right hand sword touching the middle of the other man’s back, “turn around and take your death like a hunter, not like the cowardly dog you are.”

“Glad you could join us, Winchester, the more the merrier,” Terry shouted loudly. “I think your fuck toy misses you. He cried all night even though we kept him entertained.”

Dean laughed, “Yeah, your friends aren’t going to be joining you, they’ve got plans in hell. Why don’t you join them?” He then thrust Honor through the other man’s back, skewering his heart. Dean pulled Honor free as the body fell to the ground. He looked up to see Kevin approaching the house knife in hand after his wild goose chase. “On your knees asshole. NOW!” He crossed the yard in a couple of large steps and had Courage at the man’s throat, “I said, On. Your. Knees.”

Kevin fell to his knees, his hands laced behind his head, “I didn’t do anything, I swear Winchester, I didn’t do a thing to him!”

“Get on the ground, face down fucker and spread your god damn legs,” Dean watched as the man scrambled to comply then rested the tip of Honor on his neck where it dripped the blood of his leader so that it ran down both sides, “Now why do I not believe you, mother-fucker.” He kicked the other man in the nuts as hard as he could and smiled as he cried out in pain, “Do you still say you did nothing to him?”

Kevin was retching, gagging and crying, “It wasn’t…….it was…..Terry…..his idea.”

Dean kicked him again, “I know, asswipe you don’t have the brains of a chicken. Don’t fucking move! I’m trying to decide if I should cut off your feet and let you bleed slowly so you can think about your mistakes, or end you quickly. Put your hands out to your sides,” once Kevin complied, Dean used Sam’s knife and one of his own to pin the man to the ground. “Don’t go anywhere, we’re not finished.”

“Sam! Sammy!” Dean heard him moan inside and rushed to his side and used Honor to slice through his bonds. He lowered him gently and was able to catch him in his arms. He took him to the bed and lowered him slowly, being very careful of the cuts and bruises on his body. He wanted to cry but still had work to do before he could break down so he walked back to Kevin and used Courage to cut a thin stripe on the back of his neck, just deep enough to get some blood on the blade, he then wiped them both clean on Kevin’s back and sheathed them, “you know you can’t draw the blades and not blood them,” he explained to the man pinned to the ground before returning to Sam.

Sam was nauseated, dizzy and in pain, he hadn’t seen what Dean had done, but had drawn himself a pretty accurate picture of the events from what he could hear. He gagged and dry heaved as Dean held his hand. “Sssss….sssss…..soooo thirsty,” Sam stammered out his voice barely a whisper.

“I’ve got water, let me help you,” Dean placed the water skin in Sam’s hands and helped him sit and raise it to his lips. “Small sips Sammy, you don’t want it to come back up,” he held his friend steady, ignoring the cries of the fucker pinned to the ground right outside the door, “that’s it Sammy, good.”

Dean’s voice was the best thing he’d ever heard and he wanted to throw his arms around him and bury his face in his shoulder, but he hurt too badly to move and he was so ashamed of what happened, “What……”

“I’ve taken care of them all, there were just four, right?”

“They…..he…..they said they hhhhhhad you. Tttttthat…..you’d be killed if I didn’t tell them about this place.”

“Shhhhhh, Sammy. It’s OK now, you’re safe. No one came after me and I got the others, well almost,” he felt Sam stiffen up next to him. “Easy, easy he’s as good as gone. I just have to finish him off but I wanted to make sure you were OK first.” Dean pressed a feather light kiss on Sam’s temple, “Do you think you can sit here for a minute?” He kissed him again, even lighter than the first.

“Yeah….um…..Dean…..do you have to? We can’t just leave him?” Sam was shaking from cold, shock, thirst and fear.

Dean gently put a hand on the mage’s back, “No, Sam, we can’t take the risk. I’ll do it fast and make it painless, but I’ve got to do it. They hurt you.”

Drawing his last knife, he positioned himself behind Kevin’s neck, pulling his head back with his hair. He leaned down, his mouth against the doomed man’s ear and whispered very softly, “This is for him, I’d let you bleed out from a thousand cuts, but that would hurt him and I won’t do that. You should be thankful that the man you raped and tortured is so kind.” Then he slit his throat and let his head drop into the rapidly expanding pool of blood. He retrieved the other two knives and went back to Sam.


	13. Aftermath

Dean dragged the bodies behind the cabin, saddened to see the other mage lying there. He checked their cart, relieved to find the first aid kit was there since he hadn’t seen it when he packed their belongings. He retrieved the saddle bags from where he had hidden them and returned to the cabin. He pushed through the door without a second thought and saw Sam cringe away from the sound.

“Sammy, it’s me,” he dropped the items he was carrying and went to offer what comfort he could to the battered mage. “Easy Sammy, it’s just you and I. The others are gone,” Dean picked up the water skin Sam had dropped and helped the younger man lay back on the bed, “I’m going to get you cleaned up and take care of you. Just rest, I’ve got this.”

After wrapping the injured man in his spare cloak, the cloak from the dead mage and the blankets on the bed, Dean set to building up the fire and filling the kettle with some water in order to warm it. He had seen more water skins in the two carts and brought them in along with some the basic travel rations that mages traveled with. He knew he’d have to go for his horse, but wanted to get Sam cleaned up and hopefully sleeping before he left him. Dean then cut up some of the leftover silk for washcloths and dug into the priory goods for some soap and something for pain.

“Sam,” he knelt beside the bed and spoke directly into his ear, “Sammy, you still with me? Can you hear me?”

“D..d…d…dean?” Sam struggled to sit up wincing from the pain.

“Easy, Sam,” Dean helped the mage lay back on the bed, “you’re pretty beat up. Just let me do the heavy lifting. I need to know though if there’s anything for pain in the med kit.”

“Yes, morphia,” Sam turned his head toward Dean’s voice, his eyes still swollen nearly shut.

“What does it look like? You…..you…..know….I can’t read,” his voice trailed off in shame at once again not being able to help his friend because of his limitation.

“It’s OK, Dean, it’s not labeled anyway I know where it’s packed. Bring me the pouch with the medications.”

Sam’s hands were shaking and Dean helped him open the pouch which was lined with pockets. He watched as the mage counted down and across making careful note of where he stopped, “here, you should see seeds when you open the pouch. It just takes a few, maybe five for me, I’m big. Crush them with the spoon or your knife, put them in one of the cups and add warm water. It has to sit at least a quarter of an hour though. You can give me this every four hours.” Sam laid back down exhausted and hurting.

“I’m on it Sammy. Can I make it ahead of time, so you don’t have to wait for the next dose?”

“Not too far ahead, no more than half an hour or it gets too strong.”

“There’s some whiskey and I brought a couple of bottles of mead that might take the edge off,” Dean offered hoping he could do something faster for the young mage, he appeared to be in extreme pain even though he hadn’t said anything, only moaning and wincing when he helped him move.

“No, not a good idea to mix the two things,” Sam counted down and across again, “this is the penicillin. Sprinkle it in the deeper cuts if you have to suture them, otherwise add it to the morphia tea. Give me the penicillin four times a day.”

“What else can I give you or do to help?” Dean had never felt so out of his element, ever and was scared he’d miss a medicine or do something to hurt Sam worse.

“That’s good for now. After…..after….god I’m sorry you have to do this, you clean me, I’ll try to sleep, then you can tell me what you…………find,” tears were leaking from Sam’s eyes again and Dean gently wiped them away with a square of the silk.

“It’s OK Sam. They hurt you because you were with me, I’ll fix you. I’m not leaving you, mage, you’re mine and I take care of mine,” he wet the silk and gently cleaned the filth from his friend’s face being very careful around his swollen eyes, “I think the morphia’s ready. I’ll get it and help you sit up a bit.”

Once he’d helped Sam sit and drink the medications Dean brought a chair to the side of the bed and carefully set out the dressings and sutures he might need. He talked softly to Sam explaining to him about the note, the pastor, the horse and his fears as he rode. When the mage drifted into an uneasy sleep, Dean began the work of cleaning the young man and dressing the worst of the wounds. He’d known Terry was cruel and undisciplined, but was appalled at the number and the severity of the cuts and bruises on his friend’s body. He’d found some ointment in the medicine kit and spread that on the shallowest wounds so they wouldn’t dry out, dressing only the deeper cuts and larger abrasions. He managed to hold back his tears until he turned Sam on his side to work on his back, and discovered that he was still bleeding from tears to his rectum and anus; Dean couldn’t bear the thought of what he’d endured. After ever so gently cleansing the entire area he applied some of the ointment as carefully as he could, but even the lightest touch to the mage’s perineum caused the injured young man to cry out in his sleep and Dean shook with rage and sorrow.

He finished by suturing the deepest cut, one on the shoulder where his cybernetic arm joined his body and settled Sam back on the bed after removing the soiled blanket from underneath him, this he used to clean the floor where he’d found the mage hanging and a chair and the floor underneath where they’d tortured him. Once done he took the blanket to the back of the cabin and piled the bodies on it so he could drag them to one of the carts. He wanted to haul the bodies well away from the cabin since they would draw scavengers both demonic and animal. Before leaving the cabin he checked on Sam and got him to take another small sip of the morphia tea that was left in the cup hoping he’d sleep while he took care of the bodies and retrieved Balto. He didn’t want him waking up alone and afraid if he could help it.

Once he was armed, Dean activated the concealment devices on both the stable and the cabin, making careful note of the landmarks and headed back to where he’d left Balto with Bert pulling the cart full of garbage. As he walked Dean reflected on what had been done by the scum he’d killed and wished he hadn’t let them die so painlessly. He wasn’t nearly as good of a man as Sam and would have gladly resurrected one or more of the fuckers just to have the chance to kill them again and make it much, much more painful for them. Remembering his promise to the pastor who’d helped him read the ransom note he sent up a heartfelt prayer to whatever god was listening thanking them for helping him find Sam and pleaded with them to help him recover from his ordeal without too much trouble. He’d already made up his mind to never hunt a mage again, but made a much more formal promise sickened by what the other hunters had done because they didn’t consider the mages to be human.

He made better time on the way back to the cabin without the bodies to weigh down the cart. It took him a few desperate minutes to work the concealment devices to bring back the structures, but once done he stabled the animals and watered and fed the three of them. He was able to find some wine in the other mage’s cart and brought that in as well as his first aid kit and some extra food. He wanted to get something cooking so Sam could eat when he woke up. He was certain the assholes who’d taken him wouldn’t have bothered to feed him or if they had, that Sam would have kept it down. He’d cleaned vomit from the one cart, his stomach clenching again at the thought of what his friend endured because of him.

It occurred to Dean as he reset the concealment devices that he hadn’t seen smoke from the fire when the device was activated and made a mental note to ask Sam about it once he felt better. He’d been initially baffled by the dried food Sam had in his cart but the mage showed him how when added to water and left to cook it became softened and edible. While not magic, it was close enough to have impressed the hell out of the hunter. He prepared something that he thought would turn out to be a soup or stew of some kind and left it to cook while he checked on the mage who seemed to be uncomfortable and appeared to be battling off attackers in his sleep.

“Sam, Sammy! Come on Sammy, wake up for me. You’re OK, we’re alone and you’re safe,” Dean was using another piece of silk to wipe the sweat from his brow as he spoke, “Come on baby, it’s just us and I’ve got you.”

The mage shot straight up as he woke and tried to scramble to a corner of the bed despite the pain it had to be causing, “No, no, no! Leave me alone, don’t……”

Dean got on the bed and held his friend’s hands, “Sammy, Sammy! Can you hear me? You’re safe, I’ve got you,” he pulled him gently into a very loose hug cradling his head against his shoulder, “Shhhhhh, baby, it’s OK, I’ve got you and no one’s going to hurt you anymore,” Dean brushed a very soft kiss on the top of Sam’s head and rocked him while he settled down.

“Dean?” Sam pulled back and tried to make out the blurred figure in front of him, “Dean…..is it really you? I…..I…..thought……I thought I dreamed you. Where……?

“It’s really me, Sammy. Let me lay you back down, OK? I don’t want you to hurt yourself any more than you are already. Will you let me help you down?” Dean felt Sam relaxing into his arms and helped him back down on the bed, adjusting him to his left side when he winced as his back touched the sheet. “There, better Sam?”

“Dean? The others?”

“Gone Sammy, they’re gone. They’re not coming back. I think it’s been long enough that you can have some more morphia and I’ve made some soup thing, will you try to eat?” Dean brought both the cup with some morphia tea and a bowl with soup to Sam’s bedside and helped him sip the tea. “Good, that’ll help and now some soup.”

“Not hungry, feel sick, head hurts.”

“Yeah, they landed a good one on your head. There’s a pretty big lump on the back and it’s tender when I touch it, but I really think a little something in your stomach will help. Please? Just a couple of spoonsful.” Dean offered the spoon again and Sam took a small sip of the soup.  
“Hurts to swallow.”

“God damn them,” the hunter ran his hand gently through the mage’s tangled hair, he’d done his best to get the worst dirt out of it, but it was still matted with filth, “I know it hurts, Sammy, but you need to eat to heal. They had to have taught you that in the priory. They even teach us lame hunters that healing requires strength. Will you try one more sip? For me? Then you can sleep and I’ll be right here. No one will get you.”

Sam choked down two more spoons of soup and fought against the urge to bring it all back up. The morphia was starting to work and his pain was receding into a fuzzy background noise but he could still feel the panic of being unable to see while being bound and violated. “P…p...please don’t leave me. Please….”

“Not gonna leave you Sammy, I’m right here, I’ll be right here…..”

“Scared. Don’t go.” Sam was holding one of Dean’s hands in his with an almost unbreakable grip.

“Right here, baby, I’ve got you,” He pressed a couple more very soft, almost whisper kisses on Sam’s ear. “Right here, Sammy, I’m right here.” Each time Dean thought he’d drifted back to sleep and he tried to move away to fix the fire and put the cabin to sleep, Sam woke pleading with him not to leave him. “Sammy, let me bank the fire and check the lock and I’ll be right back, I’ll talk the whole time so know I’m here. OK?”

“Y…Y….Yes…..just…..please….”

“Not leaving Sammy, right here.” Dean kept up a soothing patter of soft, and he hoped comforting, words as he went about making sure the cabin was locked down for the night, leaving the kettle with water near the fire so it would stay warm and moving the soup away so it didn’t boil away. There was a bucket in the corner and he used it to relieve himself since he didn’t want to leave the mage alone again. He was very careful to not refer to the other hunters or to Sam’s injuries directly and just kept saying his name combined with variations of ‘you’re not alone’, until he finished the chores, “Come on Sammy, just another sip of the medicine, it will help you sleep.”

“Don’t want to! Please, no…..” Sam panicked again at the thought of sleeping and dreaming.

“I’m right here Sammy, I’ll watch over you. No one will hurt you,” Dean kept his voice soft and one of his hands resting on the mage’s head, the only place it didn’t look like he’d sustained an injury.

“No please!”

“Shhhhhh, Sammy, it’s OK,” Dean slipped off his boots and crawled into the bed behind the mage and carefully put an arm across his stomach, “Relax against me if you can, Sam. Just rest and I’ll tell you more about the library.” He felt him start to relax a bit, his breathing still rapid and shallow, but some of the tension bled from his body as he pulled the covers over them both.

“The library……” Sam breathed the word like it was a benediction, “please, tell me.”

Dean adjusted himself carefully so that he could support the other man’s body without touching too much of the bruised and battered skin and brought his mouth near the mage’s ear as he launched into a detailed description of the wonders he’d found underground at the library. Some of it he’d already told him, but it didn’t seem to matter, the talk of the both the books and the technology seemed to take away some of the fear that had kept him from relaxing and he was soon asleep. Dean laid awake a lot longer wishing that there was a way to erase the trauma he’d endured but knew all he could do was be there for him.


	14. Guilt

Dean woke from a light sleep as dawn was breaking over the horizon. Sam was sleeping, but uneasily and he built up the fire to make him another dose of the morphia. His bruises had continued to bloom through the night and he looked worse than ever. Dean didn’t know how the young mage had survived the abuse or how the hell he could have felt bad about him killing the last of his tormentors. He left the cabin to quickly take care of the animals and empty the chamber pot he’d used, suddenly aware that Sam hadn’t asked to relieve himself or wet the bed in the night and made a note to get him to try to empty his bladder so he could see if he was bleeding inside.

After returning inside Dean reheated the soup and judged the morphia tea ready so he very gently woke the restless mage, “Sammy, time for some more medicine. Wake up, Sam.” He touched him as gently as possible and Sam lashed out with his left arm catching him on the thigh. Dean caught his hand before he could draw it back again and held it as he continued to talk, “It’s OK Sam, we’re alone. There’s no one here that will hurt you. You’re safe.” He repeated the words over and over until his patient calmed down.

“Dean?” Sam’s voice was shaky and hoarse.

“Yeah, it’s Dean. Let’s get you sitting at the side of the bed if you can.”

“They’re gone,” a statement rather than a question this time.

Dean helped Sam sit careful to avoid the worst of the bruises and lacerations. The mage cried out as he sat but allowed the other man to help him put his legs over the side of the bed. “Hurts to breathe,” Sam was panting in obvious discomfort, “hurts everywhere.”

“I know. That’s why I’ve got more morphia for you, but first I need you eat a little more soup and try to pi…..pee…..um, relieve yourself if you can,” Dean move the bucket between Sam’s legs, “I need to see if there’s blood.” He moved back to the fire area and turned his back knowing how it was hard to go if someone was watching and probably more so after what Sam had been through. “Just let me know when you’re done…..”

Sam’s cry of pain cut him off and Dean was back at his side in an instant helping support him. The urine was tinged pink and he knew that was bad but worse was the coughing that the deep breath the mage had taken caused. Sam was crying again by the time the coughing stopped and he was pale.

“I’m sorry it hurts, I really am,” Dean sat next to his friend with one hand supporting his back, “but you did good Sam, you did so good,” he held the cup of morphia tea for him and Sam drank most of it in three swallows. “That’s it Sam, the medicine will help. Will you eat a little soup for me? Just a couple of spoonsful, like last night,” Sam was still shaking from the pain of urinating and coughing so Dean fed him like he had the night before. “That’s it Sam, you’re doing so good.”

“S….s…..sorry.” Sam’s voice was barely a whisper.

“What? You have nothing to be sorry for,” Dean helped him get his legs back on the bed and helped adjust him so he was as comfortable as possible.

“So much trouble, too much…..” Sam could see a little better and reached for Dean’s hand, “trouble for you….just a mage.”

“Not at all,” The hunter got to his knees next to the bed so he could look into Sam’s eyes, “It’s no trouble. You took care of me when you knew it would cause problems for you, I owe you my life and I don’t take that kind of debt lightly. Besides, who am I going to show the library to if I don’t get you well enough to travel. I want to it to be you, share it with you. I want to see your face when you see the books, so just concentrate on getting better and stop the worrying about too much trouble. Please?”

“Don’t want to dream,” Sam held on to Dean’s hand like it was the only thing tethering him to earth, “Bad dreams, hurting dreams. Will you…..will you stay?”

“I just said so,” Dean put his other hand gently on Sam’s head. “Head still achy? Were you dizzy when you sat up?”

“Still hurts, not dizzy, not sick, means its better,” The injured man moved his head so he’d have more contact with the hand stroking his hair.

“There was blood in your pee. We’ll have to watch that and when you sleep I want to check your other injuries. I put this ointment,” he reached out to grab the small pot and brought it close enough for Sam to see, “on some of the shallow cuts and…… well…..on…..your ass, gods I’m so sorry Sammy.” Dean had to blink away the couple of tears that were threatening to fall before he could look up again.

“Not your fault…..”

“I shouldn’t have left you, I should have been there.” 

“I don’t blame you, you came for me, saved me,” Sam was desperate to let the hunter know he bore no responsibility for had happened, “You came.”

“Not soon enough, Sammy, not soon enough,” Dean continued to finger comb Sam’s hair and tried not to imagine how frightened he had to have been, how much he’d been hurt all because he’d wanted to take him out, show him off and teach him a little about how people viewed the techno-mage cult; to let him feel a part of something other than an outcast society. The hunter was furious with himself but would keep it inside for the time being, Sam healing was the most important thing. “Time for sleep Sammy, I’ll be right here and I promise I’ll wake you if it looks like you’re in a bad dream. That work for you?”

“You came, thank you,” Sam’s voice was slurred with sleep and his eyes closed as he murmured his thanks.

Dean stayed at his bedside, on his knees, until his breathing had slowed. The breaths were still shallow and quicker than normal, but regular, so that Dean was able to treat his wounds and get up and take inventory of their supplies. He didn’t want to have to move the injured mage anytime soon and hoped they had enough water to be able to stay put for at least a few more days.

The next two days passed in much the same way with Dean attending to the chores and keeping Sam’s wounds clean and cared for while Sam rested between doses of morphia. He had Dean reduce the number of seeds in each dose and draw out the length of time in between them in order to wean him off slowly and prevent the medicine from becoming a habit. Sam was still sore, moving was painful and he was having a lot of trouble breathing which is what bothered Dean more than anything. The young mage couldn’t draw a deep breath without setting off a volley of coughs that sometimes lasted five or more minutes. He had not coughed up any blood….yet, but Dean was worried that would be the next symptom to develop.

During the periods of time that Sam was awake and lucid Dean spent the time with him going over the maps they had and learning to identify the features drawn on them well enough that he felt he could use the maps to get around. He was very careful to avoid direct questions to Sam about his ordeal and didn’t really want the details, but also knew that the only way for Sam to get past the trauma he experienced was to talk about it and let go of any fear or anger that lingered. Dean had seen hunters who had been attacked and tortured by demons go crazy from not talking about their experiences and he didn’t want to see his friend head down that same road.

Dean was up well before dawn on the third day. Sam had had a very bad night tossing and turning while crying out in pain despite the morphia. His breathing had become even more labored and Dean could hear fluid in his lungs when he pressed his ear to his chest or back. To make matters even worse, Sam was feverish.

“Sam, come on baby, wake up for me,” Dean was desperate to get some water into the mage hoping it would help cool him off. Their supply was running low though and Dean knew they’d have to move on even with Sam so sick. “I’ve got some penicillin for you, it’s the last of it, but I want you to take it. Please?” 

“Dean? I’m cold.” Sam had started to shiver after Dean left the bed. “Just want to sleep.”

“I know, Sammy. Drink this up for me and you can close your eyes again,” Dean continued to cajole using his most persuasive voice and brushing the mage’s bangs off his face, “I won’t even make you eat my lousy cooking if you drink this while it’s warm.” He helped Sam sit at the side of the bed, brought him the bucket and made him drink the medicine before turning his back. He had been very careful to allow the injured man as much privacy as possible given how injured he was and had gotten him into his pants once he’d stopped bleeding.

“I’m good, Dean. Need to lie…..” Sam’s sentence was interrupted by a fit of coughing so hard that it was painful to listen to and his eyes were watering once he could finally breathe again. “Need to lie down.”

Dean helped him back to bed but knew they couldn’t stay at the cabin any longer. Sam needed more help than Dean knew how to give. He was sure the fever and coughing were the first signs of lung fever and he knew more people who died of lung fever than he knew died of demon attacks. He sat at the table with the maps spread before him and contemplated what direction would get Sam to help the fastest. He wasn’t going to let Sam die if he could help it, he couldn’t let him die, not now. Unfortunately the only real help to be had was at a priory. He’d spoken to Sam enough that he knew they had the best chance of helping lung fever with their antibiotic and with the strange thing they’d used to listen to his heart and breathing when he was recovering. If anyone could cure him it would be his fellow techno-mages.

After deciding he’d head out to the nearest priory, Dean quickly got one of the ponies hitched to a cart and tied both Balto and the other pony to the rails. He could trade ponies when one got tired. He then got Sam up and had him sit at the table and drink some tea while he prepared the cart for him. Taking the straw mattress from the cabin along with the blankets, cloaks and pillows, at least with these things to pad the cart he could spare Sam additional bruising. The hardest part of his task was convincing Sam that they needed to go.

“I don’t want to Dean, I don’t feel good. I’m tired and my chest hurts,” Sam tried to convince Dean to put him back to bed, “I don’t want to go anywhere, I just want to sleep.”

The hunter walked him to the door, “See Sam, I’ve got the bed in the cart, if you want to sleep you’ll have to lay down there, there’s no mattress on the bed anymore. Come on, Sammy, I’ll help you to the cart, you can sleep all morning if you want.”

“Why do we have to go? It’s safe here.”

“The library Sam, remember? I want to take you to the library and we need more water,” Dean gently guided his friend to the cart, “You want to see the books, right?”

Sam got into the cart and settled onto the mattress, “I do want to see the books, I still can’t believe there are that many in one place it’s almost a miracle. I wonder what kind of books are there?” All the words caused another few minutes of coughing and the mage was out of breath by the time he stopped

“That’s it Sam, you’re doing great. I know it hurts, but you have to cough to get better. That’s what my old man always said anyway. You stay covered up and think about what kind of books might be in the library and let me take care of the rest but tell me if you need to stop to pee or get sick or anything, OK?” 

Once Dean got Sam settled in the cart and covered up he switched on the cloaking device for the cabin and headed off down the road. According to Sam’s map the nearest priory was about two days travel away at the usual slow pace of a pony cart. Dean planned to make it there earlier by rotating the three animals and pushing them at a faster rate. It meant they wouldn’t be able to stay at a priory cabin that night, but Dean felt getting Sam to help sooner was the better choice. He’d keep Sam as warm as possible while utilizing the concealment device on the cart to keep them safe from predators that night.

They finally stopped for the night as the last light of day shone over the horizon. Sam was worse, he was burning up and Dean had trouble getting him to wake up to take water or broth. He’d questioned him a few days ago about the medicine pouch and knew which pocket held willow bark, a fever reducer and made a weak tea for Sam with some of the last of their water. He’d watered both Sam and the animals heavily throughout the punishing trip and only took a few sips himself to try to conserve what they had left. If he fucked up any of the signs leading to the priory, none of them would have a chance. He, not for the first time that day, cursed Terry and his friends for messing with Sam and bringing this down on them. He hoped to hell they were burning with the demon spawn and regretting their choice.

After making sure the animals were cared for and getting Sam to drink the willow bark tea without choking on it, Dean allowed himself another sip of water and crunched on a handful of dried oats for dinner. He used the remaining daylight to study the map he was using and hoped he could correctly decipher the marks that led to the priory. While looking at the maps a few days before, Sam had shown him what to look for, mostly so that Dean would be able to avoid any priories that stood between their cabin and the library. Dean was praying now that he knew them well enough to get Sam to the priory doors before the lung fever got much worse. When it was no longer light enough to see the maps he rolled them up and tucked them away before lying down next to Sam and pulling him gently toward him. The mage was radiating heat and not resting easily at all. Dean began to whisper to him about the library, the books and the artifacts in an effort to get him to sleep for a bit. Once the mage quieted down somewhat, Dean sent up a heartfelt prayer to the pastor’s god, whoever that was, asking him to show him the way, to help him save his friend before it was too late.


	15. Surrender

Dean had just about given up hope when he hadn’t found the priory by mid-day, but after cresting a final rise, he spotted the structure in the valley below. It was on a stream of all things, something that hadn’t been indicated on the map and Dean was transfixed by the sight of the all the running water below him. He’d never seen so much water in one place before and figured that this had to be the wealthiest of all the priories and knew it would be a good spot for Sam to recover. His initial thought had been to drop Sam off within walking distance of the gates but there was no way the sick man would be walking anywhere so Dean resigned himself to bringing Sam right to the gates, asking for help for him and turning himself in. He figured as long as they healed the mage he could live with whatever they decided would be his fate and that he’d have at least balanced the scales and given the mage his life back in exchange for his own.

It didn’t take long to get to the gates, the horse and ponies could smell the water and were just as eager to get to the stream as their driver was. Surprised that there were no guards on the outside of the gates Dean tried them and found them locked. He kicked against them as a knock and called out, “Hello the priory, I’ve got one of your mages and he’s very sick, please open the gate and grant us entrance.”

A guard appeared at a window in the gate, “What did you say? You have one of our brothers?”

“Yes, I’ve got Brother Samuel from the Priory of Scion (he butchered the pronunciation) and he’s got lung fever. Will you take him in and heal him?”

Dean was desperate at this point, Sam sounded like he was breathing under water, his fever was higher than ever and he’d sweated through every blanket they carried, “His fever is high and he’s not waking up anymore. He sounds like he’s drowning.”

“You’re a hunter aren’t you? Why would you bring us a sick mage? Why haven’t you just killed him and been done with it or did you coerce him into showing you to the priory gates so you could have your final payday. Imagine the bounty you’d be paid for all the heads here! I’m no fool and you and whoever your friend is in the cart can run your scam somewhere else.” The mage shut the window.

Dean was beyond angry and frustrated, “Look you stupid son of a bitch, look! He’s cyborg and he’s one of you. You can’t turn him away! He’s given you his life,” Dean pulled the blankets back and exposed Sam’s cybernetic limb as well as all of his healing bruises, “At least look at him you mother-fucking assholes before turning him away. No one else will help him!” Dean kicked at the gates in frustration.

The guard cautiously opened the window again and poked his head out, afraid the hunter would lop it off his shoulders right then and there, “I’ll be damned. He is cyborg. Where did you say he was from again?”

“He’s Brother Samuel from the Priory of Scion. He was on a mission to deliver supplies and messages when a group of hunters captured and tortured him for fun. I found him, saved him and killed them, now I need you to heal him,” Dean released his shoulder harness and put his blades on the ground at his feet followed by his knives as well as Sam’s, “Here are my weapons, lock me up where I can do no damage. I don’t care what you do to me, save him, save his life.” The hunter fell to his knees and put his hands behind his head in a position of submission and waited for the guard to respond.

“I’ll have to get one of the Masters I can’t make this decision.”

Dean shouted as the window closed, “For god’s sake, hurry.”

He didn’t have to wait too long before the gates were being pulled open and several mages rushed out to take charge of Sam and of course him. He hoped that Sam was being taken directly to the infirmary; he was taken to the council room to face the Master Magi who would decide what to do with him. His hands had been tied behind his back and he was being herded down the hall much more gently than he would have treated an enemy and he once again felt ashamed that he’d hunted these men and women without a thought beyond the bounty they would bring. Once in the council chamber he was brought in front of the bench where the trio of Masters held court.

“Hunter,” the title was almost a curse, “why were you in the company of one of our brethren and why have you brought him here to be healed. What do you hope to gain from your actions?” 

Dean felt the weight of the six eyes staring at him while waiting for him to speak, he hadn’t really thought he’d have to enter the priory and had no idea what to say and so fell back on the truth, “He, Brother Samuel, Sam, saved my life. I was surrounded by kobold demons and had sustained a mortal wound. Sam killed the demons and dressed my wound before sending the demons to hell. He then took me to a cabin and stitched my wound closed. He risked his career and home to bring me to his priory so I could heal. I just returned the favor. Please take care of him he is a good man, a much better person than I am.”

“How did he come to be so ill? Our physicians say he sustained a severe beating and there is evidence of a brutal rape. Tell me hunter, is this how you repaid his kindness?” The right hand Mage glared at Dean, ready to condemn him for the smallest cause.

“No, no. I didn’t hurt him, but he was hurt because of me.”

The right hand Mage leapt to her feet, “What do you mean by this? Do not use word tricks with us, hunter! We demand the truth within the council chamber at all times. Do not try our patience!”

The left hand Mage spoke for the first time, “Sit Eve and hold your own council, let’s hear the hunter’s story before we condemn him. We consider ourselves better than his kind who kill without thought, let’s prove to him that we are as civilized as we like to believe. Continue, hunter.”

Dean wished he could have a sip of water, his throat was parched and his tongue was sticking to the roof of his mouth, but continued anyway, “he visited me as I healed in their infirmary. We talked about growing up mage and growing up hunter, we played chess and we became friends. They, his Masters, condemned him to a year and a day without a home because he saved my life and brought me to the priory, I wasn’t going to let him serve that sentence alone. I would have taken his head and he saved my life, I owe him everything and I pay my debts.

However, I was careless and other hunters saw him in my company. They took him to punish me; tried to ransom him back to me. I found him in less than twenty-four hours, but they’d already…..” Dean felt the tears he’d been holding back begin to fall, “they’d already hurt him.”

The right hand Mage spoke, “these hunters, where are they now?”

“I killed them. He, Sam, asked me to spare the last one and I slit his throat as easily as I’d done the others. I left them out as carrion, they didn’t deserve burial, hell, they didn’t deserve the quick death I gave them but I did so to spare Sam any more hurt. He’s a good man, an excellent mage and a kind and decent person. I’ve never met anyone like him and I don’t care what you do to me, but please, save him, heal him.” Dean hung his head, tears still flowing at the thought of what Sam had suffered and prayed again to the nameless god to save his friend, his love.

The middle Mage stood to speak, “Hunter, we will imprison you here in our cells until Brother Samuel is well enough to confirm or refute your story. We will continue this proceeding at that time and render a verdict and your sentence. Jobs Gates help you if you’ve lied to this council and laid a hand on our Brother in anything but succor. Take him away, feed, water him and keep him well but confined to a cell.” The other two Master Magi stood and the three left the council chamber.

It was the middle of the fourth or fifth night and Dean couldn’t sleep, he was going crazy wondering what was happening with Sam. Had he gotten him to help fast enough? Was he healing? Would he recover? The magi guarding him where nice enough, they fed him, took out the chamber pot, brought wash water and he had enough water to drink for the first time he could remember. They let him out once a day into an enclosed area so he could get some exercise if he wanted while they cleaned and presumably searched his cell. The only thing they wouldn’t do was tell him how Sam was doing. The guards either pretended they didn’t hear him or told him they didn’t know when he asked. 

He’d taken to pacing his cell when he couldn’t sleep and was doing so now trying to let the repetitive motions lull him into relaxation when he heard a noise in the hallway. He was the only prisoner and wondered if they were bringing someone else to the cells so he stopped and listened to the approaching footsteps. He grew concerned when they stopped at his door. This was something new, they usually left him alone at night and he immediately feared Sam had died and they decided to get rid him right away rather than waste any more water on him and so backed up into a corner of the cell and took a defensive posture.

Sam was breathing harder and was more tired than he’d thought he would be by the time he reached the cells and was sure the guards would hear him breathing even if his footsteps were silent. The cells weren’t too closely guarded since a prisoner would be caught well before he reached the outer wall so there was usually just one brother on at night and it was easy for Sam to slip by while he was engrossed in his book. Now he had to make sure he could wake Dean from the door without being too loud. He hadn’t wanted to risk the keys, yet. He stopped outside the only occupied cell and caught his breath before opening the window in the door.

Dean heard someone outside his cell breathing loudly and briefly wondered who was on duty that night before resuming his defensive stance. He relaxed a little when the door didn’t immediately open and approached the door when he heard the window latch lift, “Who’s there? What do you want?” He almost didn’t believe his eyes when the window opened and he saw Sam standing there.

“Dean, it’s me. Be quiet the guard’s not sleeping, just not paying attention. Are you all right? They didn’t hurt you did they?” Sam regretted not grabbing the keys he wanted nothing more than to pull Dean into a hug.

“Sam! They wouldn’t tell me how you were doing? Fuck, what are doing out of bed? Are you all right?” Dean got right up to the window in the door so he could whisper while checking his mage from top to bottom looking for anything that might still be wrong. “You still sound terrible.”

“Thanks. I’m better, but no one would tell me what they were doing with you other than that you were being held until I could testify. Testify to what? That you cared for me after…..” Sam’s voice dropped even lower and he was unable to finish his sentence.

“Basically, yeah. I told them what happened from the kobold attack to me finding you in the cabin and killing the others….”

Sam cut him off, “you told them you killed those men? Dean!”

“Yeah, Sam I did. I told the truth and hoped that would be good enough. They’re going to ask you for your side of the story and check that I wasn’t the one responsible for your injuries,” Dean put his hand up to the bars wishing he could touch Sam’s face and assure himself he was real.

“That’s no problem then, since it’s the truth our stories will be the same. I’ll even tell them you vowed to never take another mage as bounty. Are they treating you all right?”

Dean laughed softly, “Better than I deserve. I’ve never had access to so much water before and it amazes me every day when they bring fresh water just to wash with. The food’s pretty good too, but no mead. How did they heal you? And I know it’s not magic,” Dean flashed his biggest smile as the last words left his mouth, “It’s so good to see you, Sam. I was…..was scared. You were so sick.”

“It was lung fever,” Sam confirmed. “You were right and we were both lucky that this was the nearest priory. Priory of Many Waters is devoted to the study of medicine and nanotechnology. They had some new antibiotic that they gave me which cleared my lungs almost right away. They also did these chest treatments to loosen the mucous, sorry, which helped as well. The nurses have told me they are working on something called steroid that can cure inflammation but it wasn’t ready yet. I’m better, but not completely healed. I need antibiotic for another five days at least. I shouldn’t be out of bed, but I had to make sure you were OK.”

“Sammy, I’m so glad to see you up but go back, don’t risk coming back. Your Masters seemed to want to at least listen to what I had to say and so far everyone’s been kind. You rest, answer their questions and hopefully we’ll be back on the road soon.” Dean didn’t want his mage to leave, but knew he needed the rest in order to heal. Now that he knew he was on the mend Dean figured he might actually sleep as well. “Good night Sam. I’m sure we’ll be able to talk again soon.”

“I’ll be back, Dean. I’ll let you know what’s going on, probably not every night, but every few nights. You came for me and I’ll be here for you. Good night, hunter.”

Dean watched the window close with regret wishing Sam could have stayed there all night. He settled back into his bunk and thought about the gentle mage who’d showed him a whole other side to the techno-mages and their magic. He fell asleep thinking about the way the mage’s bangs just brushed his eyes remembering holding him as they fell asleep and prayed that they’d be able to be together again soon.

A couple of nights later, Dean was pacing his cell again, his hope that Sam would come to see him tempered with his knowledge that the mage was still very ill and shouldn’t be out and about in the chilly night air. Despite wishing for the mage to appear, he was still startled when the lock clicked open and his friend slipped through the door. He stood still, not quite trusting his vision as Sam closed the door almost all the way to avoid having the lock engage and waited for the vision to speak.

“Dean!” Sam covered the cell space in two giant steps and had his hunter wrapped in his arms in seconds, “so, good to see you again. Are you still all right?”

Dean returned the hug glad to be able to feel for himself that the fever was gone and that the bruises had healed, “I’m fine, Sam, and so glad to see you too. You’re not breathing as loudly. Hey how did you get the keys?

“Shhhhh, keep your voice down. The guard is out there but I convinced him to look the other way while I snatched his keys and slipped past him. I’ll reverse it on the way out,” Sam sat on Dean’s bunk and Dean joined him.

“What do you mean? I thought your will thing didn’t work on people,” Dean was curious and just a little afraid, even though he trusted his friend.

“I’m not manipulating you,” Sam put his hand on Dean’s thigh to help reassure him, “as I was laying around in the infirmary I got to thinking that I’d only ever tried my will trick on people who knew what I was doing. I wondered if I could cause subtle shifts in behavior like ‘look the other way’ or ‘there’s no one here but you’ on people who weren’t expecting it, so I started to experiment while I recovered. It drained my arm pretty quickly, but I’ve been spending time outside every day to keep it charged.”

“Okay, I can see the benefit, but why here, why now?” Dean figured that Sam wouldn’t need to use something like that in one of the priories since he was a techno-mage and one of the brothers.

Sam sighed, “They didn’t want to let me see you. No one had a good reason and it made me suspicious about how they were treating you so I used to it leave the infirmary and to get in here to check on you, make sure you were okay. I used it the first time for real the other night.”

The hunter was quiet while he turned Sam’s information over in his head as if looking for a trick or an untruth and found he couldn’t poke any holes in the mage’s explanation, “I just don’t get why you’d risk it?”

Sam’s voice became very small and very soft as he responded “You came for me, you cared for me, even after…..”

Dean put his hand over the one on his thigh and squeezed it gently, “of course I came for you Sam, you…..you’re…..you’re my mage, my friend.”

“I brought you something,” Sam’s voice was still shaky and he rushed through the words to keep from tearing up as he handed Dean a small paperbound book, “it’s a children’s primer. I….I….want to teach you to read, if you want to learn.” Sam’s voice trailed off to almost nothing just in case the hunter took his offer as an insult.

“A book? For me?” Dean held the small volume and turned the pages not quite believing what Sam had said.

“We make these at each priory to help the children learn to read. It’s not a valuable ancient text, but it will help you learn to read, if you want.” Sam was looking at the floor, very intentionally avoiding the hunter’s green eyed stare.

“This is……I….I don’t even know what to say,” Dean was overcome by the offer and didn’t want Sam to see his tears, “I…..I…..yes, yes please. I’d like that. Thank you.”

Sam let out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding, “Keep the book on you so the guards don’t see it and wonder how you got it, I want to keep my visits secret since they’re being so cautious with you. Here, let’s get started and you can read these first pages back to me when I return.”

Dean sat on his bunk for a long time after Sam left just staring at the book he held in his hands, he couldn’t remember the last time anyone had given him such a valuable gift. His father hadn’t cared how well he did in school when he was small because he didn’t think a hunter needed to waste time with words and numbers. John’s philosophy had always been that knowing how to poke things with the pointy end of a blade was enough knowledge for a hunter. Dean had learned to read the names of the various demons he hunted out of necessity so he could decipher his bounty lists and had picked up a few other words along the way and had been content with that, until recently. Sam had taken the lantern with him so he couldn’t see the words anymore but he still couldn’t stop looking at the small book. When he finally lay down for the night he tucked the book under his pillow and kept one of his hands on it, determined to not let it get away in the night.

The next couple of days passed in much the same way, Dean spent his time studying the words in his book, sounding out the longer words like Sam had taught him. He was determined to show the mage he was trying and pushed himself harder than he had at anything other than demon killing. Sam came each night to visit and to listen as Dean read the words printed in the small book. He had him study ahead four pages each day on his own, Sam then listened to Dean read and helped him where he needed prompting. They were very comfortable sitting close together, thighs and shoulders touching, as they reviewed the words in the book. Dean remained hyperaware of Sam’s trauma and moved very slowly around him keeping things strictly business between them; Sam seemed to relax as he was teaching, able to distance himself from his experience at the hands of the other hunters and both of them just enjoyed the time spent together in the night.

The first night Sam didn’t show up for their nightly lesson, Dean didn’t give it a second thought. He’d known it would be hard for the mage to get away every night. The second night had him a little more worried, but still not terribly concerned. The third night that passed without sign of Sam made Dean start to worry about what was going on. He tried asking his guards if they knew whether or not Sam had recovered or whether or not the council had questioned him to no avail. They continued to either ignore his questions or shrug them off, so by the fourth night Dean was going crazy, pacing his cell and worrying about what was happening beyond his cell walls. When the door to his cell finally opened and Sam slipped in he nearly barreled him over.

“Sam! Where have you been? Are you all right?” Dean threw his arms around the mage without noticing his arms were full, he backed up a step as he felt the blades in Sam’s arms, “Sam?”

“It’s Honor and Courage. Get armed, we’re leaving,” Sam handed the weapons to the hunter along with a hooded cloak like the one he wore. “They won’t know we’re gone until they bring your breakfast tomorrow. Keep your blades as quiet as you can and hold my hand.”

“What’s going on, Sam?” Dean buckled his swords across his back as he spoke and tucked his knives in their various sheaths and grabbed his book, “Why….?”

“Shhhhhh, I’ll explain after we’re out of here. Give me your hand,” Sam pulled the hunter through the door and closed it very softly behind him. He lowered his head to Dean’s ear and whispered, “Just do what I do and keep very, very quiet. Don’t let go.”

Dean nodded and held on to the mage’s cybernetic hand as they moved slowly and quietly past the mage on guard who looked up from his book, but didn’t seem to notice the two of them walk past his post. Sam kept them in the shadows and moving steadily toward the back of the priory, near the wheat fields stopping just past the mill to check behind them.

“Okay, you’re going to get wet and the water’s cold. We’re crossing here because the water wheel will cover any splashing we make and then we’ll move through the field, once across it there’s a gate that’s never guarded. I’ve got two horses tethered there; I moved them last night and prayed no one would notice them missing right away since horses come and go with missions. Do you have questions other than the obvious?”

Dean shook his head no, still curious but full of respect and trust for the mage.

Sam took his hand again and led him through the rushing stream and then silently through the long wheat, both men crouching down to keep their heads below the sheaves. They moved slower through the field and Dean listened for the sounds of pursuit now certain they were breaking out, but with no clue why. He held his friend’s hand and kept his questions to himself knowing that the mage wouldn’t be breaking every rule in the book without a good reason.

Once they reached the horses Sam deactivated the concealment devices he’d fixed to the saddles and leaned down to whisper in Dean’s ear, “we’re heading east, but then we’ll double back, activate the concealment devices and wait until afternoon right here. Once we’re sure our pursuers are well on the way we’re going to head north which will put us on course for your library. Stay in contact with your saddle at all times to keep yourself concealed. I’ll be able to keep the horses quiet and there can be no talking after the sun comes up.”

Dean looked at Sam with questions in his eyes, but did as he was told knowing he’d eventually get the full story from the mage so all he said was, “so we’re laying a false trail? Good thinking.”

The horses grazed contentedly through the morning as the men remained in the saddle and on alert. Near noon they finally heard a group of mounted men crossing the stream and heading to the gate. Sam pulled some energy from his arm and used his will to convince their two horses to sleep as the search party made their way through the gate and spotted the trail they’d made earlier. Once they had moved out of earshot, Sam pulled his will back and turned to the north with Dean on his heels, neither man saying a word until they finally stopped for the night in a thick stand of scrub trees. 

After he dismounted Dean looked to Sam with a raised eyebrow and received a nod in return. “So, why the secret departure in the middle of the night? I’m guessing it’s not good news.”

Sam put a hand on the hunter’s shoulder and pulled him closer, “No, not good, pretty bad actually, so I pulled you out,” the mage looked down at his feet as if unsure how to continue, “Rub your horse down and we’ll talk after we water them.”

Once the animals had been cared for Sam had Dean saddle his horse again with a loose girth and they both activated the concealment devices, “it’ll be harder to see just us rather than us with the horses. I’ve got enough energy that I can keep them quiet again if necessary, but I think we’re safe for tonight. Tomorrow we should be well off their search radius since I talked a lot about heading back to my home priory so they will hopefully focus their efforts south east. You have questions, ask away.” Sam sat at the base of a tree and Dean joined him enjoying his warmth and proximity.

Dean asked the only question he could think of, “Why?”

“I testified in council a few days ago – the day after I brought you the primer. I thought it went well and they seemed satisfied that you had nothing to do with my…..Anyway, you brought me to them and that seemed to hold a lot of weight, particularly with the Fulcrum, the middle master. Later that same day I was out in the courtyard charging my arm and reading and I overheard a conversation I shouldn’t have. Right and Left, Eve and Adam were arguing about what to do with you since you were now considered a danger to any mages in or out of a priory. I’d told them you’d vowed to stop taking mages but your word didn’t seem to mean as much to them as it does to me. They moved on and I couldn’t follow, but I started asking around and the general consensus was that they were going to turn you over to your guild and let them punish you for turning traitor.”

Dean almost choked on the water he was sipping, “What? Do they know what they do to a hunter found guilty of treason?”

“Yeah, Dean, I think they do. It was a convenient way to execute you without doing it themselves.” Sam took one of the hunter’s hands in his and sat holding it without speaking for a long time, “I’ve never been ashamed of being who I am. Never felt anything but loyalty to the priory system that saved me as a baby, but I was sickened by what I heard. I told them everything Dean, everything,” Sam’s voice broke on the second ‘everything’, “I……I…..told them that without you those…….others, I won’t call them men or hunters, would have killed me after……but you came for me and you saved me. You could have walked away with all the priory goods and the crowns and set yourself up for a fairly comfortable life if you’d wanted to, if you were less honorable but you saved me.”

Dean started at that thought and opened his mouth to speak but was cut off by Sam before he could make a sound.

“I know it didn’t even cross your mind, and you may have thought I didn’t hear you talking to me that first day, but I did and I know what it cost you to ask for help reading the note and I know too that you wasted no time. I wanted you to find me and at the same time I couldn’t bear for you to see what they’d…..they made me…..did to me.” Sam was crying as he remembered the pain and shame he’d felt as they used him.

“Shhhhhh, Sammy,” Dean pulled the mage’s head gently to his shoulder and wrapped his other arm around his broad and shaking shoulders, “I was never not going to come after you, never and I killed them for it, Sam. They won’t hurt you or anyone ever again.”

Sam sniffled and got ahold of himself long enough to continue his narrative, “Unfortunately, that played a big part in their judgment. The council decided that even though you saved me, like we both claimed, in doing so you murdered four humans and the council couldn’t countenance that, wouldn’t understand the motivation behind the killing. They felt, feel, that you should have turned your colleagues over to your guild for punishment and by not doing so you were committing treason against your governing body.”

“Mother-fuckers! I dare them to have seen what they did to you and not take action, Terry and his mother fucking asshole friends deserved a lot worse than I gave them and Sam, I’d do it again only I’d make it last longer. Those fuckers deserved everything they got,” Dean saw Sam cringe at the anger in his voice and was immediately ashamed, “Sorry, Sammy….come on, I’m not angry at you.” He pulled Sam even closer and rocked him gently, “Shhhhhh, baby, it’s all right. I’m here, they’re gone and so far we’re alone. Shhhhh,” Dean placed a very light, almost breath of a kiss on the skin below Sam’s ear, “We’re all right. I’m so sorry I got angry. Not angry with you, Sam.”

They sat in silence with Dean holding Sam until he stopped shaking. He offered him the water skin and Sam drank before continuing, “So, I knew I had get you out. You came for me, you killed for me and I wasn’t going to sit by and do nothing while they took you to your death. I worked over the last few nights getting things together. The saddle bags have food and water for a couple of days, once we’re well away we can hit priory cabins for more water, food and shelter. I removed a couple of the concealment devices from some wagons and fixed them to our saddles. I was so relieved when I triggered one and it worked. I then had to find and steal your weapons back for you. I didn’t have time to visit and explain, thank you for trusting me.”

“No, Sam. Thank you for taking those risks for me. I’m in your debt again. Good thing I’ve still got the library to show you,” Dean looked shyly at his mage and smiled at him causing the mage to blush. “Between the reading lessons and this, the library isn’t nearly enough. I’ll never be able to repay what you risked for me.”

Sam sighed and adjusted himself so he had his arm around the hunter, the shorter man’s head on his shoulder, “No, Dean, you owe me nothing, friends don’t hold debts. I’d do it again and if you’re outlaw, then I am too. We’ll figure it all out together if you’ll have me as a friend,” Sam couldn’t look at the other man, afraid he’d see disgust or dismissal in his eyes.

“You’re right, no debts between friends and Sam, I’m proud to be called your friend. You are kind, brave, intelligent, and I’ve never met anyone else like you. Be careful, you’ll find yourself stuck with me.”

The mage blushed bright red at the compliments and desperately wanted to kiss Dean to seal the friendship, but panicked at the thought of anything more physical than hand holding and even that was pushing his buttons. He knew Dean would never hurt him but still felt and heard the brutal attack he’d endured every time he closed his eyes. He hoped the hunter was a patient man because he wasn’t sure he’d ever get past the rape that had been his introduction to sexual intercourse.


	16. Mine

Both men were up with the first light of dawn and on the road after watering the horses. They kept up their pace and conserved their horses’ energy by cantering for an hour, dismounting and walking for an hour and then trotting for an hour before starting the cycle again. They broke at midday to rest the horses and themselves for an hour and ate some of the travel bars Sam had packed while sipping sparingly at the water, saving the lion’s share of it for their horses.

Sam opened a map Dean didn’t remember seeing before, “We’re approximately here,” Sam pointed to an area in the lower third of the map, “I figure if we stop here,” he indicated a wooded area, “tonight then we can make this priory cabin by the next night and resupply. I studied a bunch of maps while recovering and judging by your story I think this general direction will get us close enough to the area where you found the library. Let me know when the terrain starts to look familiar and you can take over navigating. Then we’ll just use the maps to locate supplies until we find your library. What do you think?”

Surprised that Sam wanted his opinion when he seemed to have thought everything through, Dean studied the map while he considered Sam’s words, “We are mostly headed in the right direction to the best of my knowledge, but I think we’ll need to go a little further west. I didn’t use a map either time I found it. When I went back a couple of weeks ago I headed in the general direction I remembered and used some guesswork after I traveled what I thought was the right distance. It was about a three week walk from your priory north and slightly west.”

“You’re right then, we’ll have to angle west to get back in line with the Priory of Scion. There’s a road about a half a day after the cabin we’ll use tomorrow night that should help us get back on track.” Sam took a small instrument from a pocket of the cloak he had tied to his saddle and looked at it for a minute or so.

“What’s that?” Dean rose and went to Sam’s side.

“This? It’s a compass. The needle always points to true north, you’ve never seen one? The priories use them as trade goods in some towns. I’m surprised the hunter’s guild doesn’t have some.” Sam handed the small clocklike piece to Dean.

“So it’s saying north is this way, meaning if I line myself up to north, west would always be on my left, right….I mean correct?” Dean looked over to the mage who was smiling at him.

“Yes, that’s right,” Sam laughed, “correct, as you said. You guys don’t use maps much do you? How do you figure out where to go to find the demons you’re looking for?” Sam was up and checking his cinch and saddle bags, preparing to move on.

Dean did the same with his horse and mounted up. “We have some in the guild houses and once you get a list of outstanding bounties you can check the maps there to see what general direction you need to go. We usually come across and follow signs of demon activity until we find the fuckers and take them out. It’s pretty rare that we get caught unaware like I was with the kobolds, but it happens.” They moved out at a walk to warm the horses up again, “I’m sure whoever made the maps must have used this compass thing, but they don’t hand them out. Too many hunters never return.”

“So anything you travel with you supply yourselves? Your guild doesn’t help you with anything else?” While Sam understood about things not getting returned if a hunter was killed in the field he still found it strange that they’d send their members out without anything but a list and a memory of a map, “That seems harsh.”

“We win our blades after completing our apprenticeship and after that we’re on our own, but are held accountable to the oaths we take when we get bladed. Remember, we travel all over and can report in and collect bounty from any guild house in any town or city. We could be so far from the original house that supplied us they might never get their maps or equipment back.”

“Yeah, I guess that makes as much sense as the priory system considering the supplies as community property.” Sam kicked his horse into a gallop and they were off.

They rode through the day alternating gaits and allowing for one more brief break before Sam called it a day and took them off the road to another stand of scrub trees and shrubs. He judged them far enough from any priory traffic that they could risk a small fire and eat warm food that night.  
Once they’d cared for their animals and eaten Sam looked over at Dean and saw him working with the primer he’d given him and he moved to sit next to him, “Ready to read to me?”

Dean had been concentrating so hard on the words in front of him he hadn’t noticed Sam until he spoke, “um…..yeah, I worked on it every day, but there are a few words I don’t know.”

“That’s OK, that’s why you get taught to read, no one knows them all right away. There are still words I don’t know but once you read more things you’ll sometimes be able to figure out what a word means just by the sentence it’s in.” Sam moved closer to the hunter and had him start reading from the beginning of the small book, prompting him gently when he got stuck on a word and lavishing him with praise. “You’re doing great, really.”

“Thanks, but sometimes I look at a page I’ve worked though and think I’ll never get it, the words still look strange,” he sighed in frustration.

“That’s how it is for everyone at first. I don’t really remember learning to read, but I’ve taught enough people to know that one day it will stop looking strange, almost like magic,” the mage flashed him a wide smile that brought his dimples out and they both laughed at his reference to magic. “Seriously though, one day it will click and just make sense from that point on. Once we get to the library I’m sure there will be books you can use to work on your reading if you’re still interested.”

“No, I mean yes, I’m interested, just frustrated,” Dean smiled back at the other man wanting to hold him, kiss him more than ever but unsure how Sam would react. They still hadn’t spoken about his ordeal in anything but the broadest terms.

“That’s understandable, I get the feeling that things usually come easily for you. I know it’s sometimes hard to be patient while your mind works though the problem.”

Dean had the distinct impression that Sam was referring to far more than just reading, but chose to let it go for the time being, “it’s going to be another long day riding, I’m going to turn in,” he turned to wrap himself in his cloak but stopped and looked over at the mage, “it will be warmer if we stay together on one side….if you want to,” he turned away to let Sam decide what he felt comfortable with and smiled to himself as he felt him settle down behind him, one hand resting very lightly on his waist.

The fire had nearly burned itself out when Dean was jerked awake, unsure at first what had woken him he drew one of his knives and lay still listening. It took him less than a moment to realize that Sam was no longer next to him and he jumped to his feet ready to defend both of them if necessary. He looked around the clearing, poised to spring, knowing there was something out of balance but not yet knowing what it was. He then noticed Sam, curled into a smaller ball than he would have thought possible, shivering and crying under a couple of shrubs.

He approached the frightened mage slowly, sheathing his knife as he drew close, “Sam, Sammy,” he reached out and touched the mage’s shoulder as gently as possible, “Sam, come on and wake up, it’s just me here. You’re safe, Sam.”

The frightened mage pulled away from his touch and tried to make himself even smaller, “Stop, please stop……no more, no more….” Tears were streaming from both eyes and caught in his nightmare he didn’t seem to hear Dean’s voice.

“Shhhhhh,” Dean made the soothing sounds one would use with a frightened child or animal and kept up a steady stream of sounds and words as he knelt next to his friend. “Come on Sammy, wake up baby, we’re alone and you’re safe. Let me help you Sam.” He reached out again and stroked the other man’s arm very lightly with the back of his hand, “That’s right baby, it’s just me, shhhhhh, you’re fine and we’re alone.”

“D….d…..d….dean?” Sam opened his eyes and looked the hunter in the eyes, “b…b…bad dream,” he took the offered hand and crawled out of the shrubs, “Really bad dream.”

“Yeah, I picked up on that, you been having these often?” Dean helped the other man to the fire and then turned his attention to getting the blaze going again.

“Yeah, almost every night since……..well since then. It’s like it’s all happening again and I can’t seem to turn it off.” Sam accepted the water skin Dean handed him and took a swallow, “during the day I can forget it ever happened, mostly, but at night it’s like a wall comes down….” Sam’s voice trailed off and he just stared into the flames.

Dean sat down next to the mage and carefully put his arm around his shoulders and pulled him closer, “I’m so sorry Sammy. I should have never left you alone.”

“It’s not your fault, Dean, it’s not,” Sam relaxed into the one armed embrace and took the hunter’s other hand in his, “I just want to pretend it never happened at all.”

“I know, Sam, but you can’t without it driving you crazy. I’ve seen hunters try to ignore things that have happened to them in the field caused by a demon either possessing them or just playing with them. No matter how hard they try the memories always break through and if they don’t, you don’t, deal with the trauma, the stress of keeping the memories hidden and the worry about them reappearing will shred your mind,” Dean had moved his free hand to Sam’s face and was cradling it while he spoke, the pain of his ordeal clearly etched there made Dean want to kill those responsible yet again.

The mage relaxed into Dean’s hand and allowed the hunter to move his head onto his shoulder. Once there he nuzzled into his neck allowing the familiar scent to calm him somewhat as he turned into the embrace.

Dean moved one of his hands to the back of the mage’s head and tangled his fingers in his hair but allowing Sam to determine the strength and length of the embrace’s duration, “I won’t let you go if you don’t me too, Sam. I’ve got you.” He felt the mage sigh and snuggle a little closer.

“Feels good Dean, not alone,” Sam allowed himself to be pulled gently to the ground while still wrapped in the hunter’s embrace, “Please don’t…..”  
Dean stiffened, ready to let go and move away.

“Please don’t let go.”

“I won’t. I’ve got you Sammy, I’m here,” Dean placed a couple of very light kisses on Sam’s head and waited for a reaction. “Not leaving you again Sammy,” he kissed him again, “you’re mine, my mage.” He pulled their cloaks around both of them and felt Sam relax further into his embrace. As he was drifting off to sleep he could have sworn he heard the mage whisper, ‘yours.’

The next morning passed in much the same way. They continued to push their pace as much as they possibly could knowing that the farther they got from the priory they’d broken out of, the less chance those brothers had of catching up to them. They started out a little slower after their mid-day break and hadn’t even gone five miles when Dean called for a stop. He dismounted and handed his reins to Sam, “Hunter’s instinct, I feel like something’s off. Let me just scout around a little. Stay here and activate the concealers. I’ll make it quick.”

Sam watched the hunter move as quietly as a shadow as he left the road to check the small clearing they could just barely see from the road. Being alone, even concealed, made Sam more nervous than he wanted to admit, even to himself, and he hoped the hunter would be back soon. He was staring so intently on the direction where he’d last seen Dean he was startled when Dean appeared at his side.

“Sam, demons. Three nasty mother-fucking crossroads assholes,” Dean deactivated the concealer on Sam’s saddle, talking to empty space made him feel silly, “will the horses stay put on their own?”

“Yes, drop the reins and they won’t move but a couple of feet in any direction but finding them while they’re concealed will be fun.” Sam took his new quarterstaff from its holster on his saddle. “You said three, right?”

“Yeah, these are nasty shits and we’ll have to move in quickly so they don’t get a chance to escape their hosts. If you can distract two of them at first, I’ll try to behead the third before they even know what’s up then keep one focused on you so it doesn’t try to smoke out while I try to get the second one before it realizes there are two of us. We may lose the last one, but two out of three is pretty good for these guys that change hosts.” Dean looked at Sam checking to see if he had questions, Sam just nodded, “Okay, then they’re this way.”

The ambush went almost exactly according to plan and they did get all three, but not without one of them slashing Sam’s leg before he could get clear after he’d taken the first demon out with a well-placed hit to the back of his head. The other demon had snuck underneath the staff and gotten a hit on the back of Sam’s left leg, not life threatening or crippling, but painful and bloody.

Dean beheaded all three and piled the corpses together while Sam bound his wound using strips of a shirt from one of the demons. “Sam, can you do your ‘go to hell’ thing so we don’t have to kill these fuckers again?”

“Yeah, I’ll recharge the arm this afternoon. You taking the heads?”

“Um, no. Pretty sure as soon as I turn up anywhere to claim bounty I’ll end up captured and eventually killed. News moves slowly, but it moves and I can’t take the chance. We’ll just have to be content that the world has three fewer mother-fucking demons to contend with. How’s your leg?”

“Oh, right, I didn’t really think that through. It’s not deep, it’ll heal well, I’ll have to clean it tonight and use that salve we’ve got to keep it from getting infected while it closes. I will need to sew up the tear in my pants at some point, it’s not like we’ll be able to shop for new things anytime soon.” Sam examined the tear in his pants as he spoke.

“At least you were wearing leather, the cut would be worse if not. That’s why most hunters wear leather it can actually deflect duller blades,” Dean cleaned Honor and Courage and sheathed them as Sam started his ritual by drawing the circle around the dead demons, “why do you draw a circle around them?”

Sam stopped and looked over at the hunter who was sitting on a stump watching him, “it’s probably not necessary, but it gives me something to focus on before letting the power go,” Sam shrugged, “never tried it any other way.”

Dean watched the mage closely as he focused himself inward to begin building his will and briefly wondered what it would be like to have that kind of power at hand as well as how many other people could actually do what Sam could. He trusted the mage but wasn’t so sure that everyone given that kind of power would use it as ethically as Sam did. As the corpses descended into hell he couldn’t help but think that Sam’s ability would be a powerful weapon in the war they were still waging with the demons that’d been released all those years ago. Just what would a hunter be able to achieve if they were paired with mages who had or could learn to banish them for good.

“Let’s see if we can find the horses,” Sam turned and walked back to the hunter, “we’re making pretty good time and we’ll probably get to the cabin a little early. It will give me time to sew this tear and we can make something decent to eat. Hopefully the cabin is well supplied.”

“When you say ‘decent to eat’ does that mean we’ll be eating something other than dried beans and oats?” Dean asked hopefully.

“Some of the cabins have dried fruit in their pantry. It makes a decent desert and if they have a cow and flour we can make a biscuit crust so it will be like a cobbler or pie,” Sam watched the hunter’s eyes light up at the mention of pie, “I’ll keep an eye out for raspberry bushes as we travel, they should be ripening round now if we can find any.”

They found the horses relatively easily after all and were on their way fairly quickly moving out at a walk to warm the animals up. “So Sam, do they teach you guys all this survival stuff at the priories or did you just study up on it on your own?”

“The guild doesn’t teach you how to survive out here in the blasted lands? What about the hunter you apprentice with, do they teach you survival skills?” Sam looked sideways at Dean, wondering how the hell the guild could send their members out without the proper knowledge of the lands where they’d be expected to travel and to fight.

“Nothing formal and nothing written down; most of us can’t read very well it’s just not considered a necessary skill for hunting. I apprenticed with my dad and my uncle and they taught me what they knew, but the focus of my training was with weapons,” Dean thought back to his training and didn’t really remember much other than his weapons training. If he’d been taught anything else he’d conveniently forgotten it or hadn’t been interested enough to pay attention to it the first time.

They rode in silence for a bit, each man trapped in his own mind and memories, neither man saying anything until they dismounted to walk their horses. Sam then started pointing out features of the landscape and in a conversational tone explained what they indicated and where the best places were to search for food, water or shelter. The hunter absorbed the information and pointed out to the mage where he’d look for signs of demon activity and which areas were likely to be populated by which demons. Neither one was uncomfortable with the conversation as they continued to trade facts they’d learned making their trip go a little faster.

They made it to the priory cabin well before dark. The cabin, like many of those owned by the priory, was well provisioned and had its own well along with a goat which made Sam happy as he’d be able to prepare them something better than trail rations for dinner that night. Dean offered to care for the horses while Sam got busy checking the stores, getting a fire going and deciding what to cook. Once Dean had the horses rubbed down and had given them each a handful of oats and as much water as they could hold he hobbled them and left them to graze behind the cabin.

“Do you want me to go ahead and slaughter the goat?” Dean asked as he stopped in the doorway to see what Sam had decided about their meal, “I can treat your wound afterwards.”

Sam turned and looked at him aghast, “Gods no, Dean! The goat isn’t for eating. You can go ahead and milk her.”

“Yeah, about that….” Dean looked down at the floor and blushed, “I….um….”

“You don’t know how, do you?”

Dean sighed, “I know the mechanics of it, I’ve just never done it before and I think the goat hates me.”

This caused Sam to laugh, “Hates you? Animals don’t hate.”

“This one looked at me funny and tried to bite me. It may not hate, but it definitely doesn’t want me near it,” Dean had no desire to learn how to milk anything and was growing more uncomfortable by the minute. “Maybe there’s something else I can do while you, you know?”

“Seriously, Dean, how do you survive when you’re out hunting?” Sam was genuinely curious since he was used to always doing for himself when on errands for the priory.

“Kill things, throw them in the fire, and eat them. Pretty simple really,” Dean watched as Sam poured water over some dried apples and shriveled black things that looked pretty much like bugs. “There are a lot of animals around so I didn’t usually go hungry. If I’m near a town I could always go in and buy a meal or two, grab a bed for the night and visit the local tavern,” he hesitated and then added, “I’m sorry I know you can’t do that. What the hell are those black things anyway?”

“These are raisins, dried grapes, they’re good try them,” Sam handed a small handful to the hunter who looked at them suspiciously. “They’re sweet, like candy.”

Dean put one in his mouth and closed his eyes as if to not see the other raisins in his hand. He broke out in a smile once he bit down and the sweetness flooded his mouth, “these are good, I don’t think I’ve ever eaten these before or if I have, I didn’t notice them.” He put the rest of the raisins in his mouth and chewed, “yeah, I like these, let’s take some with us. What are you doing with them?”

“I told you they were good,” Sam was smiling, but winced as he turned and felt the cut on his leg pulling, “I’m going to make an apple-raisin crisp for dessert, potato soup for dinner if you get me some goat’s milk.”

“Yeah, about that, maybe I could go find firewood to restock what we use?”

“I’ll do it, but come and watch. You can at least learn the technique. What if we end up with a cow or goat at the library? You’ll have to help out,” Sam grabbed his cooking pot and rinsed it out before heading out to the small stable area.

“I didn’t see any goats, cows, pigs, horses or anything alive when I was there, I don’t think we have to worry about it, Sam,” Dean followed behind the mage, he was OK with learning but never wanted to actually have to practice milking.

Sam found a bucket in the stable and turned it over to use as a stool, “what if we decide to stay there for a while? We could trade for a cow or goat and some chickens for fresh milk and eggs, maybe even have a small garden.”

“I told you that it was underground, I don’t think cows or chickens want to live inside and even if they did, I don’t think I want to live with them inside. Same with a garden and there were no windows that I saw. I didn’t explore the whole thing though,” Dean watched what Sam was doing and thought it looked pretty easy, “Here let me try, it doesn’t look that complicated.”

Sam looked at the hunter checking to see if he was being serious and gave up his seat, “be gentle, but firm.”

“That’s two different things,” Dean tried to copy the motions Sam had been making without success and the goat turned her head to look at him. “It’s okay goat, just getting some milk here, not going to hurt you or eat you.”

“It is and it isn’t two different things, here let me show you,” Sam put his larger hand over Dean’s and helped guide him through the motion of drawing the milk down, “see when you work from the top to the bottom, you’ll get milk.” He kept his hand on his for a couple of minutes while Dean got the motion down and then a little longer, just to keep holding the other man’s hand. He reluctantly let go and encouraged the hunter to try on his own.

“There! I did it,” Dean’s outburst startled the goat but they managed to keep the kettle from tipping over. “How do you know when you’re done?”

“If you’re using the right motions you’ll know when you stop getting milk. This little one has probably given us all she’s got and it’s enough for what we need. Would you put her out to graze with the horses?” Sam grabbed the cooking pot and started to head to the cabin, limping slightly on his cut leg.

“I’ll clean and dress that wound for you when I finish out here,” Dean called after him. “It’s in an awkward spot and after what you just went through with the lung fever you don’t need that to get infected.”

Sam just waved his hand and headed back indoors leaving Dean to deal with the goat. He knew that the cut on his thigh needed to be tended to but felt anxious about having to get undressed in the company of another person. Although he knew Dean wouldn’t hurt him, not like those other hunters, he at the same time felt panic rising in his chest at the thought of anyone touching him. The dreams came almost every night since his attack and they were more real than he thought was possible. Having Dean wake him the night before helped, he’d slept peacefully after, but more often than not he spent most of his nights awake, afraid to sleep and relive his rape again and again.

The soup was simmering and the crisp baking when Dean came back in with another arm load of firewood, “This should see us through the night. I’ll stable the animals after we eat and then conceal the stable area,” he rinsed his hands in a bucket of wash water, “Let’s see about that cut on your leg, get those pants off and lay down on the bed.”

Time seemed to stand still as Dean turned to the mage and waited for him to respond one way or the other. “Sam, hey Sam, are you all right?” When Dean reached out to touch his arm in order to get his attention, Sam jerked away and took a couple of steps back, his eyes unfocused and the color draining from his face, “Sam, it’s me, it’s Dean.”

“No, no, no…..” Sam was trembling and didn’t seem to realize where he was.

Dean dropped his arm and stepped away from the frightened mage, “It’s okay Sam, shhhhhh, it’s just us here and you’re safe. I’ll activate the concealer and no one will find us here. Shhhhhh, let me help you.”

“No, sssssstop, please, no…” the frightened mage sunk down to the floor and had his face in his hands, “please, don’t….”

The hunter checked the items on the fire and pulled the soup away before grabbing a water skin and moving slowly to where his friend sat on the floor, “Sammy, it’s just me, Dean. Like last night. There’s no one here and you’re safe,” Dean lowered himself silently to the floor, careful to not startle Sam, “Here’s some water, take a drink and open your eyes. We’re here by ourselves Sammy……I’m sorry I didn’t think before I spoke. You’re all right Sam no one is going to hurt you.”

The mage accepted the water skin and took a couple of small sips before handing it back, he drew his knees to his chest and his head was now resting on his knees as if he was trying to make himself as small as possible, “Can’t…..won’t open…..don’t want to see.” Tears streaked his face though he made no sound other than the few words he stammered out.

Dean inched a little closer, their shoulders and thighs were touching. He didn’t know what else to do for his friend and worried that if he made the wrong choice he’d make things that much worse for him, so he sat quietly next to the mage, trying to comfort him just by his proximity. He wasn’t sure how much time had passed as they sat together but Sam’s breathing gradually started to become more regular and after a while the trembling stopped altogether. He still kept his eyes tightly closed and his forehead on his knees as if afraid that by opening them he’d find himself back with the gang.

“Sammy?” the older man very gently brushed one of Sam’s hands with his own, “Sam?” His patience was rewarded when the mage lifted his head from his knees and opened his eyes, blinking at the light.

“Dean?”

“Yeah, Sammy, it’s just me. We’re alone and you’re safe. I’m not going to let anything happen to you, I promise,” Dean put his arm around Sam’s shoulders and let it rest there lightly allowing time for Sam to get used to the contact, “I can treat your cut while you’re dressed if that’s easier. I didn’t……I didn’t really think. I’m sorry I scared you.”

“S’okay, you don’t scare me,” he paused gathering his thoughts, “I just….sometimes I’m just back….there…..” Sam’s voice was soft and small, “I know I’m not, but I am. I can’t really explain it, it’s like a dream but I’m awake. It’s so real.” He leaned into the embrace and put his head on Dean’s shoulder, drawing comfort from the familiar feel of the leather he wore as well as the scent of leather, sweat, soap and Dean. The combination shouldn’t have been as appealing as it was, but it made him feel safe and cared for. He didn’t want to move, he was so relaxed now that the vision had faded.

“Do you think you can lie on the bed and let me take a look at that cut? It needs to be cleaned and I want to see if we should stitch it closed,” Dean brushed the mage’s hair away from his face as he spoke, still holding his with his other arm.

Sam nodded into Dean’s shoulder, “I can……I’ll undress. I have to fix these pants anyway. I know you cared for me…….after, but would you turn away?” his voice trailed off into almost nothing as he made his request.

“Of course, just tell me when you’re ready,” Dean busied himself with fire and the food pulling both pots away from the fire so that the contents wouldn’t burn. Once Sam was ready he brought the med kit to the bedside and turned back a corner of the blanket to expose just the leg with the injury. He cleaned the area gently but thoroughly and carefully probed the wound’s depth. “It’s not too deep, just bloody,” he rested one of his hands on the mage’s calf which didn’t seem to be causing him any anxiety. “I think we can get away with just dressing it and using that healing salve.”

“Whatever you think is best, you’re right, I can’t really see it. I trust you Dean,” Sam tried to stay relaxed and focused on the present, the feel of Dean’s calloused but gentle hands, the smells of the soup and dessert, the scratchy blanket covering his ass and his other leg and the sight of the green eyed hunter frowning slightly in concentration while caring for his wound. He kept repeating to himself, ‘I’m okay, Dean’s here, I’m okay.’

The remainder of the evening was pleasant, Dean was appreciative of the meal and Sam, wrapped in his cloak repaired his pants. They worked together to clean up after dinner and then Dean left to bring the animals in and allow Sam some privacy while he got ready for bed.

Every time Dean thought of what Sam had been through and what he was still facing he felt his anger rise. He’d known that there were hunters out there who weren’t worthy of bearing their blades and who felt the world owed them because they hunted the demons that still terrorized the population. He’d just never knew for sure who they were. It sickened him that those people, no criminals, took the same vows he did to protect humankind and yet preyed on them as if they were nothing more than demon ridden meat suits, especially the techno-mages. Sure, he’d taken his pleasure where and when he found it over the years, not discriminating between male or female partners. However, he’d never forced himself on anyone and couldn’t even begin to understand the mindset of those who would.

Then there was Sam. He’d never met anyone like the Techno-mage cyborg, didn’t know anyone who had held his interest beyond a night or two of shared pleasure and he now found himself between the proverbial rock and a hard place. He wanted Sam more every day that he spent in his company and yet was reluctant to even casually touch him for fear of causing him to flash back to the terror and pain he’d endured at the hands of the criminal hunters. He was torn and still carried a shit ton of guilt for having placed him in that situation in the first place. He didn’t know how Sam could stand to be around him, a constant living reminder of his pain and humiliation but he couldn’t, he wouldn’t walk away unless Sam himself requested it of him. He’d do whatever it took to help him find his way out of his darkness and hopefully he could one day help him replace the bitter and painful memories with new more pleasant ones.

Sam allowed his shoulders to drop as the door closed behind Dean. He knew he’d overreacted to his request to undress earlier, but didn’t know how to stop the flashbacks. Even being in the cabin that night was harder than he’d anticipated. All the priory cabins were built and furnished in a similar fashion and Sam’s mind was having trouble differentiating between now and then. He looked at the rafters and felt his shoulders tearing from the weight of his body. He rubbed absently at his wrists as if they were still abraded from the ropes that had bound him. He couldn’t look at the chairs without remembering the helplessness he felt at being bound and open to the continuous assault. The combined sensations overwhelmed him and before he could pull himself back to the present a wave of nausea drove him outside where he vomited up the little food he’d been able to eat. As he knelt at the side of house he wondered how long the hunter would put up with him and his weaknesses.

Dean was strong, stronger than anyone he knew and he was resourceful. Watching him practice the katas with his blades each day was like watching a dancer. The steps were intricate and the flashing blades deadly and yet he never once cut himself or dropped a blade. Even the first time they met, when he’d been mortally wounded he moved with deadly accuracy and grace dropping the remaining demon before giving in to the pain and blood loss. Compared to the hunter, Sam felt like he was too big, too clumsy and too much of a liability despite his skill with the quarterstaff. All it would take to put Dean at risk would be to freeze up in the midst of a fight, paralyzed by the memories he couldn’t control and he couldn’t let that happen. The hunter deserved so much more than he could give and he knew he should leave, but the truth was he couldn’t bear to be alone and he didn’t think anyone but the hunter could help him.

The sound of Sam retching reached the stable and Dean hesitated unsure whether or not he should check the mage or allow him to be sick in private. Concern for his friend outweighed the need for privacy and he moved in the direction of the sounds and stopped when he saw the mage kneeling at the side of the cabin. Uncertain, but genuinely concerned he approached the younger man slowly.

“Sammy, you need anything? Let me get you some water,” Dean let himself into the cabin and grabbed one of their freshly filled water skins. He dropped to his knees when he returned so he wouldn’t put Sam in a position of vulnerability. “Here, rinse. You’ll feel better.”

“Thanks,” Sam accepted the water skin without looking up, both ashamed and relieved. He wanted nothing more than to throw himself into Dean’s arms just to feel surrounded by his strength but was ashamed of his weakness enough to not seek out the comfort he needed. As he rinsed his mouth he felt the hunter rubbing his shoulders and he risked a look to his right catching the green eyes looking at him full of concern.

 

“You okay?”  
Sam shook his head, “You must think I’m such a pain in the ass.”

“Let me worry about what I think. Are you all right?” Dean rose and offered a hand to help Sam stand, “Was the soup bad?”

The mage smiled at the out Dean had provided him, “No, no. The soup’s fine. I…..it was nothing.”

“Right, I get sick over nothing a couple of times a week myself. Look, I won’t press you if you really don’t want to discuss it, but know that I’m not going to judge whatever you say,” Dean had put his hand back on his friend’s back hoping to communicate comfort without making him feel out of control of the situation and managed to make himself feel completely out of his element. “Come on, let’s go in and conceal the cabin. You can talk or not.”

They went back inside and Dean secured the door and then activated the concealment device before tending to the fire, giving Sam plenty of time to decide what he wanted. When he turned from the fire he was met by Sam’s steady gaze. He flushed slightly but removed his jacket and moved a chair so he could sit facing the mage. Once seated he reached out and tucked a stray lock of hair behind his ear, “There’s nothing you can say to me that will change……change the fact that I think you are……” Dean closed his eyes as he searched for the right words, “the most courageous, most generous person I’ve ever met and when I think of what I’d have missed had I killed you when we first met, it makes me sick.”

The two wounded and self-doubting men sat in silence, each fighting against their instinct to push the other away in an act of self-preservation. Sam tentatively reached a hand toward the hunter but drew it back almost as quickly and lowered his eyes so that he was looking down at his thighs. Dean moved his chair closer so that their knees were touching and took the mage’s cybernetic hand in both of his gently rubbing the back of the hand with one of his thumbs.

“You can tell me anything, Sammy. It won’t change how I feel or what I think,” Dean, continued to stroke his thumb over the other man’s hand waiting as he watched for signs that the touch had become too much to tolerate.

“I don’t think I can talk about it…..not just to you…..to…..well, anyone. I…….,” Sam continued to look down, not wanting to risk seeing disappointment in the other man’s eyes, “can’t forget it, but can’t…..don’t want to remember it and I think……” He felt tears leaking from his eyes; he hadn’t even realized he’d begun crying again and felt like a complete child. “I think I’m a liability.”

Dean let go of Sam’s hand and took his face in both of his, brushing away his tears with his thumbs while raising his head so he could look into the color changing eyes, which were now a whiskey brown, as he spoke, “You could never be anything but good. You’re a good fighter, a good teacher, a good cook and….yes, and a good friend. Nothing you say or do will convince me otherwise, but……I….I understand how you’d feel otherwise and I can work with that if you’ll let me.” He brought their faces closer together so that he could feel the breath leaving Sam’s mouth as he exhaled, “I totally suck at this feeling crap, but Sam, I owe you more than I can put into words, and even if I didn’t, I’d never turn my back on you or let you feel less than you are. So you’d better get used to my crass, uneducated ass, because you’re stuck with me for the time being,” Dean let his lips just ghost over Sam’s in a shadow of a kiss before he sat back, one hand slowly stroking down the cybernetic arm and resting over the hand on Sam’s thigh.

“Come on, Sam, let’s get some sleep. We’ve got plenty of travel ahead of us and the days are not going to get any shorter,” Dean rose and turned his back to bank the fire giving Sam time to undress and slip under the blankets. Once he heard Sam sigh and settle into the straw mattress he gathered their travel cloaks and began to spread them out on the floor near the fire.

“Dean?”

“Sam?”

“Um…..why……I mean….” Sam sighed, “I…..please….”

Dean picked up the cloaks, slipped out of his pants and crawled into the small bed with Sam, drawing him into his arms and cradling his head on his shoulder, “I’ve got you Sammy, you’re not alone.”

The mage relaxed into the embrace and threw one of his legs over Dean’s and sighed again, “Thank you.”

“Anytime Sammy, I won’t let you face it alone, you’re mine now,” Dean pressed a gentle but firm kiss on the mage’s head, “mine.”


	17. Healing

Their luck held for the next few days and they were able to rest at and raid priory cabins for supplies. Twice they’d tracked and dispatched low level demons. Dean was sure if he were actually on a hunt he would have been able to find more but contented himself with the easy prey and concentrated only on those that had the misfortune to cross their path. Their days passed in pleasant conversation as they exchanged hunter and mage lessons and lore; comparing the two when the topics overlapped and debating the differences. They were dismayed by the amount of misinformation each community held as gospel truths about the other one and occasionally surprised when the lore passed down actually was the truth.

Sam’s flashbacks continued, but seemed to be lessening in frequency and strength as time passed and his attack became closer to history then to current events, but he was still hesitant to undress in front of Dean and while he allowed himself to be held and cuddled to sleep at night he avoided all but the lightest of touches and kisses. The mage couldn’t imagine his life without the hunter at his side, but also felt an invisible wall between them whenever he thought of exchanging more intimate caresses or kisses.

The hunter found himself looking forward to the long days in the saddle. He loved listening to Sam talk and really loved how he lit up from the inside when they stumbled across one of his favorite topics; the mage’s enthusiasm was contagious and he found it easy to spend time with him. He never seemed to anger and had an endless supply of patience even when Dean was being deliberately obtuse in order to draw a reaction from him. He had healed physically but was still suffering from the almost debilitating nightmares and flashbacks of his attack although they were occurring less frequently. The hunter knew he’d have to get him to talk about it, get it out in the open, like draining an infected wound, in order for him to move on completely, but he was reluctant to be the one to cause him additional pain and so continued to hold and comfort him through the worst of the episodes determined to let the mage choose when he was ready to resume their physical relationship.

He considered himself lucky that he’d spent so many years on the road alone and had no issues with jerking himself off in order to relieve the almost constant sexual tension that spending his days and nights with the man he now considered his partner, his love caused. Dean wanted Sam more than ever and his own dreams were filled with images of him and the mage engaged in every type of sexual activity he’d ever heard of but he remained acutely aware of the need for Sam to set the pace after what he’d experienced. He was surprised by the well of empathy that he’d found within himself and how content he was with allowing Sam the time and space he needed to heal.

They’d fallen into a comfortable domestic routine with Sam taking care of setting up the cabin for the night and cooking and Dean taking care of their horses and any other animals that might be housed in the priory cabin barns. This also allowed him time to take care of his sexual needs before he cuddled up with the mage for the night and when he was done he’d bring in fire wood for the night. It was different, but it was working for the time being. Dean was well into his current fantasy, imagining Sam giving him a hand job under the table in a tavern and very near to orgasm, so didn’t hear Sam calling his name and was literally caught with his pants down.

“Dean? Didn’t you hear me? What…..” Sam stopped short as he entered the barn, “I’m sorry, I’ll…..” The mage turned and hurried away.

‘Shit!’ Dean thought as he tucked himself back into his pants and followed Sam back inside hoping he hadn’t triggered a flash back, “Sam? Everything all right? Did you need something?”

The mage was sitting on the bed, head down, but not trembling or attempting to hide which Dean thought was good so he rinsed his hands in the wash bucket and sat next to Sam on the bed. “You okay? I, um…..I’m sorry?” Dean hesitated but then put his arm around the mage’s shoulders and pulled him a little closer, “I……”

Sam relaxed into the embrace, “Nothing to be sorry for, really. I’m the one that needs to be sorry I……think about you all the time, about sex, I get hard…….and then I freeze…” Sam’s voice trailed off at the end of the sentence.

“I get it Sam and I’m okay, honest,” Dean moved his hand so he could stroke Sam’s soft hair. “You mean so much to me and I never want to hurt you or cause you to flash back.” He pressed very light kisses on Sam’s temple and rested his forehead on Sam’s head. He felt Sam’s arm snake around his waist and pull him a little closer as the mage relaxed even further into the embrace.

“I was going to ask you to see if there was any wine in the root cellar, I didn’t mean to…..”

“I know, Sammy and its okay. It’s not like you haven’t seen it before,” Dean looked through his lowered lashes at the mage and smiled. “I mean, I’ve got nothing to be ashamed of, right?” Sam’s shoulders started to shake and Dean thought he’d gone too far and started to pull away, but Sam’s arm held him in place. 

“You looked so guilty,” the mage was laughing, “I’m sorry, Dean but the look on your face was priceless.” 

Relieved that he hadn’t triggered another flashback, the hunter joined in the laughter at his own expense happy to see Sam looking so relaxed. He felt the first stirring of hope that he and his mage would eventually be able to resume the physical part of what he was now hoping would be a long term relationship.

“How about I go check on that wine, I assume it’s to go with whatever you’ve decided we’re having for dinner,” Dean rose and started toward the door, but turned and dropped to his knees so he was eye level with his mage. He tilted his head up so that he was looking right into his eyes before he spoke again, “I meant it then and I mean it now Sammy, as long as it takes, but I can’t stop wanting more of you and I can’t be sorry for that.” He leaned forward and brushed the other man’s lips so lightly that Sam might not have even felt it had he not been watching, “I can’t resist you.” He then left to check on the wine and didn’t see Sam raise his hand to his mouth to touch where he’d kissed him.

There were a few bottles of wine in the cellar and Dean brought them all up figuring they could carry whatever was left with them to their next stop and they spent a pleasant evening together; Sam still working hard at teaching Dean the finer points of chess and Dean doing his best to distract Sam from the game. Any awkwardness that may have risen between them earlier had been dissipated by their shared laughter. They killed a couple of the bottles by the time they were ready to turn in and Dean secured the fire and cabin before climbing into the small bed with his mage. After wrapping his arms around Sam and pulling him closer he placed a chaste kiss on his cheek and wished him good night.

Sam relaxed against the broad chest snuggled up behind him, his long limbs feeling loose and his head spinning just the slightest bit. He twined his fingers with Dean’s and listened to the hunter’s soft breaths for a couple of minutes before speaking, his voice barely above a whisper, “I was…..I was……untouched……a virgin.” His breath hitched slightly as the last word left his mouth and single tear tracked down his cheek.

The hunter pulled him even closer and pressed a kiss on his shoulder, “Sammy……”

“I told them you……..I said I’d…………given……..given you……you everything,” he paused, scared and vulnerable, “I wish I had,” the young mage turned in Dean’s arms and allowed him to gather him to his chest one hand on his back and the other cradling his head. Sam gave himself into the embrace and wrapped his arms around Dean, the two of them becoming a knot of limbs.

Dean had suspected this was the case and wasn’t at all surprised at Sam’s revelation. He was pleased that Sam was starting to open up to him and surprised that he was allowing him to hold him so close. He was ready to back off at the slightest indication that being held so tightly started to trigger a flash back, “I’m so sorry, Sammy, baby. I would change it if I could and baby? It doesn’t change…..I still….” Dean’s voice trailed off, unsure of what to say; hit with the realization that he couldn’t have loved his mage any more than he did at that moment, “you’re still perfect.”

The mage sniffled and tried to press himself even harder into the hunter holding him, wishing it were possible to crawl into his skin, “I remember……I remember it all.”

“S’okay Sammy, I’ve got you now,” Dean whispered, his mouth on Sam’s ear, “No one will hurt you again, they’ll have to go through me and I’m never leaving you alone again.”

“I was careless, I let my guard down,” Sam was still holding on as tightly as he could without hurting the other man, “they shouldn’t have gotten the drop on me.”

“Not your fault, baby……never your fault,” Dean drew back so he could look the mage in the eyes, “look at me Sammy.”

The mage opened his eyes and raised them to Dean’s face, tears still streaking his face.

“Not your fault,” the hunter very carefully placed butterfly light kisses on the corners of Sam’s eyes, “let that go Sam, you are not to blame and never were.”

Sam laid his head back on Dean’s shoulder and nodded in acknowledgement, afraid that speaking would restart the tears that he was just starting to control.

“Is that what you really think? That you somehow deserved what happened to you? That you brought it on yourself?” Dean kept his voice at a whisper his tone one of concern without any accusation or anger. He continued to hold on to his mage, his one hand rubbing circles on his broad back the other still tangled in his hair. 

He felt Sam nod again and he drew a deep breath to steady himself, he was so angry at the men who’d taken his mage’s innocence and left him feeling like he was responsible for his own rape but knew he had to keep that to himself that his anger wouldn’t help Sam heal. So he just held him and whispered nonsense mixed with real words and Sam’s name over and over and over again as the mage relaxed and finally fell asleep in his arms, sprawled across his chest. He pulled the covers over them both but it was a long time before he felt calm enough to drift off himself. 

They’d both made progress, but there was still a long way to go, for both of them. The hunter knew he’d have to release the anger he’d been holding on to in order to really help Sam recover and he thought he might have the more difficult task. Every time he looked at his mage and saw the shadow in his eyes, he wanted to kill the assholes who’d hurt him all over again. At least Sam had started to talk about that night and allowed him to comfort him. 

Sam woke the next morning with the feeling that something was off, it took him only a few minutes it realize he was alone in bed. He was usually the first one up and had to drag Dean out of bed, his first thought was that Dean had left him and he nearly flipped into a panic attack at the thought. He got up, peed and looked around the cabin, the fire was going and their leftover stew from the night before set close enough to reheat along with another container of water for tea. He knew he wasn’t alone, but was curious.

Dean hadn’t slept well at all and was up early. He had to pee and rather than crawl back in bed he made up the fire and started getting breakfast together, he thought he’d take care of Sam for a change. Once things inside were under control he went out to the stable and got the horses ready, including the pony they’d found at one of the other cabins that they were using as a pack animal. He smiled when he heard the cabin door open, “Hey Sammy! Good morning lazy bones.”

“What are you doing up? You feeling okay?” Sam laughed as he walked over to the stable, “I mean, breakfast and the horses ready, who are you and what did you do with Dean?”

“Cute and funny,” Dean was relieved to see his mage smiling, he’d been afraid that there’d be repercussions from their talk the night before, “no wonder I keep hauling your ass around! Seriously though, I thought I’d practice reading the maps before you woke and figured I’d do the chores too.”

“Why the maps? I thought we were going to head west for another day before turning north again?” They two of them walked back into the cabin to get started on breakfast. “Did you remember seeing something familiar yesterday?”

“No, but I got to thinking that maybe we should stop in a town and just see what kind of news has spread. We’re pretty far outside my usual territory and I’m guessing you’ve not been this far out too often so if I leave my blades buried outside the town and you get dressed up in your shirt and gloves we could check out the gossip and pick up a couple of things before we make it to the library. What do you think?” Dean handed a bowl of stew and cup of tea to the mage as he spoke and then got his own breakfast and sat down at the table.

Sam concentrated on his meal while considering the pros and cons of being seen in town.

“I know it’s outside of your comfort zone, but I think we need to know if anything has spread this far. If I’m not wearing the blades the chances of being tagged as a hunter are slim – I’ll even leave my jacket and you, you’ll attract attention because you’re gorgeous and huge, but with the shirt and gloves, no one will know you’re cyborg and a mage. Besides if you’ve charged your arm can’t you just suggest they not notice us?” Dean knew that the last time they’d done this it hadn’t work out well for them, but really thought they needed to see if anyone was searching for them this far out.

“Yeah, I could take care of anyone paying too much attention. We’d have to do that selectively but it’s possible. Where were you thinking of stopping?” Sam wasn’t entirely convinced that this was a good idea but he did see the wisdom in knowing whether or not they were still being actively pursued.

Dean got the map he’d looked at earlier. “Here, Lincoln. It looks like it’s about two days west, then there’s a road not too far outside town that turns north. Is there a way to tell on the maps how big the town is?”

“Yeah, there are different symbols this one is an average size. Not as big as Mt. Laurel but not as small as Carolton. What did you want to get in town that we haven’t been able to find in the cabins?” Sam pointed out the different symbols on the maps as he spoke and picked up their dishes so he could wash and pack them away.

“I thought now that we’ve got the pony we could pick up a few staples that we’ll need once we get to the library. We’ve still got 15 crowns and I can trade another one of my knives if necessary so we don’t have to use anything that’s connected to the priories.”

“You’ve really thought this through. Did you sleep at all?” Sam looked at the hunter knowing he wouldn’t be able to lie if he held his gaze.

Dean shook his head, “I wasn’t really very tired, I got plenty of rest.”

“I’m……..”

“Don’t apologize Sam, I wasn’t tired. I’m glad you…….that you……you felt like you could talk to me last night. I’m……..I think you’ll eventually need…………need to talk about it all and I want to be the one you talk to, the one you feel safe with. That’s what I was thinking about………..I realized…………..I mean, fuck me I suck at this shit, you’re it for me Sam. You are who I……….need……………no, want to be with and,” Dean sighed he didn’t feel like his words were doing a good job describing what he wanted Sam to know, “I want to be that for you too. So whatever it takes, I’m in for the long haul. I’m not……..not going to……going to let you go.” The hunter tried to slip past the mage so he could escape outside in case his words weren’t well received.

“Don’t go,” Sam caught one of Dean’s arms and pulled him into an embrace, “I think I want that too, but……..”

Dean felt a surge of hope that hadn’t been there earlier, “I know Sam, and I mean it. However long it takes……even forever.”

They held the embrace for a couple of minutes, neither one wanting to break away first and both feeling more whole than they had in days. Dean finally pulled away and walked to the door, stopped and looked back at his mage, “So we can talk about Lincoln while we ride today?”

Sam laughed, when his hunter wanted something he didn’t give up on it easily, “Yeah, we’ll talk. Let me get this stuff packed up. Did you fill the water skins?”

“Thanks Sam and yes, the animals all had a drink and we’re filled up for the day. I’ll check the cinches and meet you out front,” Dean smiled his way through his last chores and hoped with all his heart that his mage was feeling a little lighter as well.


	18. Lincoln

They stopped a couple of miles outside of Lincoln near a large rock formation and a pool of toxic water by mid-morning. There was a shelf in the formation that provided a good spot for Dean’s blades and Sam took one of the concealment devices off their saddles and used it to conceal all the weapons they were leaving behind. The other concealment device they used to hide the items they’d been collecting at the priory cabins. Once changed into more ‘civilian’ clothing they mounted up and headed into the town with the story that they were heading west to homestead some of the lands that had recently been considered habitable again.

“So, we’ll look for a clothier and get you some new pants, the ones you’re wearing have seen better days and maybe another shirt,” Dean was listing off the things he wanted to accomplish in town as they rode.

“Um, Dean? I doubt it’ll be that easy to just find something that fits me.”

“Yeah, we’ll have to camp at toxic lake overnight and come back tomorrow to pick the special order items up. Not ideal, but I don’t really see another choice unless they’ve got an inn that’s reasonable. We’ll have to pay to stable the horses too and I need a haircut,” Dean looked over at the mage who seemed to be carefully considering everything he said looking for a flaw in the plan, “we’ll do the clothes first then shop for the staples we’re short on. Sam?”

“Dean?” Sam looked over at the hunter.

“Do you want a haircut or anything else while we’re here? You’ve been pretty deep in thought,” Dean flashed one of his most confident smiles at the mage hoping to ease any fears he might have dug up, “we don’t have a lot of money, but it’s probably more than most of the folks here have seen in their lives. It’s not like you don’t know how the market place works it’s the same principle even in the shops. You can sometimes even bargain down the price of a bed and a meal if the landlord is desperate enough.”

“Do you think I need a haircut? I don’t really want anyone else, you know, touching me. Don’t want to…….well you know. Same thing about the clothes, what if we just get material and I’ll make them when we get to the library. I stand out enough as it is. Plus, if we do it that way, it should cost less and we won’t have to come back or stay, right?” Sam looked over at the hunter, embarrassed that he was still so afraid.

“I’m sorry, Sammy, I didn’t think it through,” Dean shook his head at what he perceived as his own stupidity, “of course we can do it that way and it’s good idea. I should have realized that you knew how to make clothing too. They really teach you guys everything don’t they?”

“They teach us everything that we might need to know while traveling since we can’t just head into town on non-market days and pick up what we need,” the mage checked to make sure Dean wasn’t bored to death with hearing again how hard it was to travel as a mage, “I don’t mind knowing how, I’m not very good at it, but I can make basic pants, the shirt might be a little more difficult, but we’ll have nothing but time once we get there, right?”

“I like hearing you talk, Sam.” The hunter offered him another brilliant smile, “you know so much more than I do that it no longer surprises me when you say you know how to do something. I’m sometimes lucky to remember which end of my blades is the pointy one,” he laughed at himself and looked over at Sam again looking for a smile or maybe a laugh and was rewarded with the younger man’s dimpled smile.

“You know that’s not true and you just want me to say so!”

“Maybe, maybe not,” Dean arched a brow in Sam’s direction, “Listen, since we’re not entirely sure whether or not the priories are looking for us we should use different names, just in case. So you’ll be Joe and I’ll be Steven and we’re brothers heading out to make a name for ourselves. Work for you?”

Sam shook his head, “Are you sure we’re not making this more complicated than it needs to be?”

“No, seriously, we use these other names as a precaution. I don’t necessarily want to have to run the horses into the ground because our names are similar to a couple of guys the guild and the priories are looking for. We’re going to stand out because we’re strangers so everything we can do to act like a couple of brothers passing through helps. So, Joe and Steven.”

“Why am I Joe?”

“Your name has three letters, I can read it now, and Joe has three letters…..doesn’t it?” Dean was still a little unsure of his new reading skills.

“But Dean has four letters, you know that, and Steven has six, so how does that end up making sense?” Sam was just baiting the hunter and he was pretty sure Dean knew it.

“Fine, you can be Steven and I’ll be Joe, better?”

Sam laughed, “I don’t really care either way, I was just wondering if there was any logic to the choice. You could’ve said there wasn’t but it’s cute to see you try to make things more complicated.”

“Whatever, Steven, let’s get going and get this done.” Dean, Joe, kicked his horse into a canter leaving Sam laughing behind him.

Brother Sam looked up and down the main street of Lincoln in amazement. While he’d always known there were areas of commerce in the towns and cities he traveled to he’d never seen one prior to the night Dean had taken him out in Mt. Laurel. That night the businesses were already closed and the street quiet. This morning all the shops were open and the street was bustling with activity. It was like a market day, but busier. He’d been worried about standing out too much, but seeing the activity in the street he was no longer worried that anyone would pay him too much attention.  
“This is amazing, Dean!” They stood at the main intersection and were looking up and down the street on both sides, “They probably have everything here, right?”

“Probably not everything,” the hunter was smiling, pleased at Sam’s reaction, “but we’ll find out. We can go into every shop if you want.”

Sam looked at his friend, unsure whether or not he was pulling his leg, “Really?”

The hunter laughed, his eyes crinkling in delight, “Really. We’ve got time and it’s not that big of a town. Where do you want to start?” They hadn’t attracted any more attention than any other strangers would on their walk from the livery stable to the town square and Dean was less concerned with being recognized. Sam did stand out, but only because he was so tall and so good looking, people couldn’t help but notice the golden giant as he strode through their streets.

Practicality finally won and the mage led them to the apothecary. He was curious to see what kind of remedies they carried and whether or not they could find replacements for what they’d used from the med kits. From there they worked their way up one side of the street, stopping at every shop so Sam could see what was on offer and down the other. He was fascinated by the stationery shop and bought a small pot of indigo ink, after triple checking with Dean that it was all right to spend the money on it. They were both pleased to find a reasonable selection of fabrics and leathers at the tailor and their request for just the material wasn’t uncommon enough to make the tailor look at them twice. Dean did all the talking and bargaining since Sam was just a little too overwhelmed by the sights and sounds of the shopping district to want to pay attention to the transactions. They were able to find the staples Dean wanted for the library, although the wheat flour was on the expensive side and Sam thought they’d do better at a market.

The hunter encouraged Sam to look around while he was getting his haircut at the barber, but the mage wasn’t at all comfortable with being separated from Dean even for the quarter hour the haircut would have taken and chose instead to stay just outside the door so he could duck inside if he became too nervous. The barber had taken one look at the floppy brown hair on Sam’s head and had asked if he wanted a cut as well. The two ‘brothers’ answered no in stereo, with Sam’s hand actually going to his head to protect his hair. The barber just smiled and muttered something about it taking all kinds.

The last place they stopped was the confectionary and it was easily Sam’s favorite place in the whole town. It was a small shop, but the rows of brightly colored, sugary treats reminded him of the polished gems and stones at the mineral/jewelry shop. While Sam was trying to decide which flavors of the hard candies he wanted to take with him, Dean bought a bar of chocolate at an obscene price, certain that his mage had never had the chance to try anything like it. He planned to surprise him with it after dinner.

The proprietress was used to seeing people from the countryside marveling over the display in her shop so wasn’t thrown by Sam’s reaction at all, “It is quite a sight isn’t it? I sometimes have to remind myself it’s my livelihood and not just a dream.”

“This is unbelievable,” Sam was truly awed. The only sweets he was familiar with were the honey cakes that the kitchen at the priory made. Sugar was very dear in their province, but Dean had explained to him earlier that since they harvested beets in this area they had more access to sugar than some other places. “It’s like a garden in bloom. There’s just too many to choose from.” He looked to Dean for help.

“My brother has never been to a really large town before,” Dean explained, “so let’s take two each of the red, pink and yellow ones.” The shop owner wrapped their choices carefully and sighed audibly as the two left her shop. She dearly wished men as handsome as the two who had just left would settle in her small town. Even if she was already married, she’d love to be able to see them around town.

Once back on the street Dean handed Sam one of the red disks, “Just put it on your tongue and let it dissolve, then tell me what you think.” Dean popped one of the candies into his own mouth as well and carefully watched his mage’s face as the candy started to melt on his tongue.

“It’s cherries! I taste cherries,” Sam’s smiled one of his widest, brightest smiles as he looked at the hunter in surprise. “How does she do that?” He sucked on the small disk and actually closed his eyes as he savored the flavor.

Dean just about came on the spot as he watched Sam sucking on the piece of candy. It was easily the sexiest thing the hunter had ever seen and he became a little self-conscious as he stared at his mage, practically drooling with lust glazed eyes, ‘probably a bad idea’ he thought, ‘a really bad idea.’ However, the simple joy of Sam’s reaction overrode his initial discomfort and he reminded himself that his mage deserved this small pleasure and much, much more, regardless of how tight his pants became. “Come on Sam, let’s go. We can pick up dinner at the inn by the stable so we can eat something different tonight. And who knows? Maybe there’s one of those books that tell you how to cook things at the library and maybe you can learn the secret of candy-making.”

They had had their purchases delivered to the stable and carefully tucked some of their purchases away in their saddle bags and others they carefully balanced on the pack saddle the pony wore before heading out of town.

“We should have time to pick up the things we left at that lake and move a little farther away from town before stopping tonight. I’ll feel better if we’re a little further out, even with the concealers,” Dean looked to his right to see if Sam agreed.

“Yeah, that’s fine. We have what? A couple of hours of daylight left?”

“Something like that, we can probably get about 12 miles out after we pack up maybe a few more. We’ll stop when we see a good shelter after riding for a bit.” Dean kicked his horse into a trot and Sam followed leading the protesting pony that he’d decided to call Bert even though it was different pony.

Once they were back at the toxic pond they moved in concert to gather up their weapons, extra supplies and the mage’s cloaks they’d wrapped things in and watered the horses and themselves so they didn’t have to stop again until they were ready to call it a day. Dean was double checking the cinches on Bert’s pack saddle when he felt Sam approach from behind him and stop. Rather than turning around, Dean continued working on the tie downs securing their supplies, interested in seeing what Sam was up to.

“Um, Dean?” 

Dean turned. The mage was almost on top of him, his eyes on the ground, “Sam.” Dean held his ground he didn’t want to startle the mage and so leaned back slightly against the pony giving Sam a little more space.

They stood in silence for what seemed to be minutes, but was in actuality just a few seconds before Sam opened his arms and pulled Dean in for a hug, “Thank you. I had such a nice time in town today and I would have never been able to without you.”

Dean was surprised by the hug and a little unsure of his response knowing very well the younger man was still having night mares and flash backs of his ordeal. He raised his arms and placed them tentatively around Sam’s waist. It was the first contact Sam had initiated since his attack and Dean didn’t want to turn the experience into something frightening, “It was my pleasure, Sammy,” Dean spoke into the other man’s chest where he’d been crushed, “I loved showing it to you. I loved being seen with you.” He raised one of his hands to Sam’s head and cradled it as he pulled him closer, “I’d do anything to bring your smile back forever.”

Sam allowed himself to be held and even began to relax a bit into the embrace. He loved the way his hunter smelled, it was one of the things he concentrated on at night as he tried to fall asleep, afraid of yet another nightmare. He turned his head slightly to the side to bury himself in Dean’s neck and just breathed in Dean’s very being. As he pulled himself away, not in fear, but because he knew they had to get going he brushed his lips very softly against Dean’s neck, just below his ear and whispered his thanks again.

They rode as hard as they could with the pony in tow. The horses were fresh after being stabled for most of the day and eager to move out. Their quick pace made conversation difficult so each man was lost in his own thoughts while they rode. Interestingly enough, they were both thinking similar thoughts about the same thing. Each absurdly pleased that Sam had initiated the embrace and that it hadn’t caused the young man any fresh trauma and each hoping that maybe, just maybe Sam would be able to sleep through the night without nightmares.

Dean called a stop at a suitable stand of trees and rocks that was set off from the road and relatively sheltered. They still had about a half hour of daylight remaining to set up camp for the night. Dean took care of the animals, loosening the cinches but leaving all of them saddled so they could get away quickly if necessary and Sam taking care of deciding where to sleep and gathering the food and ale they’d bought for dinner.

By the time they settled down to eat the sun was setting and the evening was lit by twilight shadows. Since they didn’t want to call attention to themselves they were without a fire or lantern. Dean silently called himself every kind of girl as he watched the setting sun set fire to Sam’s hair and the purple twilight that followed make his eyes stand out even more. Still being very careful of too much casual contact he sat next to the mage, both of them leaning back against a sun warmed rock.

“You were right, Dean. It is nice to have something different for dinner. Do you think we could figure out a way to keep at least a couple of animals at the library?” Sam looked over at the hunter watching him as he ate and noticing he was no longer bolting down his food as quickly as he did when they’d first met. “It would add some variety to what we could make for ourselves.”

The hunter rolled the question around in his head for a couple of bites of bread before answering, “I really don’t know, Sam. I didn’t take a lot of time either time I was there to look everywhere or at everything. Yeah, I know you would’ve.” He smiled as the mage blushed, in the twilight it looked almost violet, “but I didn’t really want to take the time. The first time I was freaked out by the whole thing and then when I went back with your book, I wasn’t even sure I could find it again and had to look around a bit. Once I was in and checked the books against yours, my concern was getting back to you in time to make the meeting I set in Mt. Laurel. I was so excited to tell you all about it.”

“So, maybe there is a way and once we get there and really look around we can figure it out, you know, experiment,” the mage loved animals and really hoped they’d be able to have a cow or goat and some chickens along with the horses. Maybe a dog to guard their little herd, “you’re smart and I’m smart, I’m sure between us both we can think of something. I mean, we are going to stay there for a while, right?” Sam was suddenly unsure of the ground he was walking. They’d never really talked about what would happen once they reached the library. He’d assumed they’d stay there together but given everything that had happened since they set out, he was no longer sure.

Dean very gently nudged the other man with his shoulder, “Of course we’re staying there! I haven’t really given much thought to how long we’d be there, but yeah Sam, I want to stay there with you, I told you baby, you’re it for me. I’m not letting you go.”

The mage felt himself blush to the roots of his hair and he smiled shyly through lowered lashes at Dean, comforted by the hunter’s words, “Good, I’m glad. I ……. hoped …… wanted....wished that you….we would stay for a while.” Sam pushed back lightly at Dean’s shoulder and they both lapsed into silence while they finished their meal.

Once they were done, Sam started to rise to pick up the campsite but Dean stopped him, “Wait a minute. You haven’t had dessert.”

“No, Dean, we should save those other candies. I don’t need another today,” Sam tried to stand again.

“No, Sam it’s something else. You trust me, right?”

“Of course, you saved me, you came. I trusted you with my life and you came,” Sam’s voice started to break just a little as his thoughts brushed on his kidnapping.

“No, Sam, don’t go there, stay with me,” Dean brushed the back of his hand against the mage’s to help center him back in the present, “I promise it’s worth it.” He waited until the young man’s breathing returned to normal before continuing, “Now, close your eyes, I’m right here. You can take my hand if you want,” the mage laced his fingers through Dean’s hand, “good, now open your mouth, I’m still here, you’re not alone and it’ll be worth it, I promise,” it took the mage a couple of minutes to center himself enough to comply.

Dean very nearly groaned at the sight of his gorgeous love with his eyes closed and mouth open in the last of the twilight, but made himself be good. He broke off a piece of chocolate and placed it on the mage’s tongue. “Like earlier, just hold it and let it melt.” He couldn’t take his eyes off of Sam whose eyes shot open as the chocolate began to melt and coat his tongue. “Do you like that?” He watched as a myriad of thoughts seemed to run through Sam’s mind as the chocolate became liquid and he finally swallowed.

“What was that?” the young mage’s voice carried a sense of awe and wonder. “That was like, I don’t even know.” He shook his head, his hair swaying gently with the movement.

The hunter smiled his biggest, most open smile, “I thought you’d like it. It’s called chocolate and it’s not that easy to come by. I was thrilled when I saw it in town and knew I wanted to share it with you.”

“Chocolate. I’ve never heard of it, I’m not sure any priory has,” Sam’s eyes still were still shining with amazement and pleasure, “Thank you.”

Dean offered him another piece and this he accepted, sitting again with his eyes closed as it slowly melted into his tongue, the pleasure clearly evident in his face, “Not all physical pleasure is sexual,” Dean said very softly, “I want to share everything with you, however long that takes. I want to make you happy.”

Sam was still holding on to Dean’s hand and he responded by squeezing it lightly and lifting it to his mouth and placed a very soft, almost non-existent kiss on it. He dropped the hand quickly, but didn’t start to tremble or back away as he would have done even a day earlier. The trip to town had definitely helped Sam overcome some of his fear, at least for the evening and in Dean’s estimation the trip, the shopping and the chocolate were worth every cent they’d spent and more. 

After cleaning up the camp site together the hunter and his mage settled down for the night. Sam, as usual, curled into as small a ball as he possibly could so that Dean was able to hold as much of him as he could. Nighttime was the only time before that day that Sam could tolerate Dean’s embrace without breaking down and Dean smiled into the younger man’s neck as he listened to his breathing begin to slow. Both men fell asleep content for the first time since Sam’s rescue. Each comforted by the fact that they meant something to the other.


	19. Confession

The next couple of days passed without incident and they planned to spend their last night on the public road system in a priory cabin. Dean had remembered leaving the road near this area on his last trip to the library and figured they would need to turn northwest from that point and travel at least a half a day’s walk. In order to avoid fumbling around in the darkness, trying to find the entrance to the library and possibly passing it by, they were breaking early for the day. Sam was disappointed that this last cabin had no extra animals housed in the stable that they could have appropriated for the library but was equally consoled by the presence of an ample supply of staple items that they could plunder.

They set about their respective house-keeping roles without words, both content with the routine they’d established. Sam watched the hunter leading the animals to the stable and pasture marveling, not for the first time, at just how good looking his companion really was. The broad shoulders, in perfect proportion to his narrow waist, his toned ass and his slightly bowed legs all added up to a very pleasing sight. He felt a stirring in his lower belly as his cock started to wake up and begin to harden. The panic that this caused had him turning to the doorway and heading inside, his mind pushing all thoughts of cocks, hard or not, aside. He could feel perspiration beginning to dot his forehead and chin as he struggled to keep the panic at bay. Once he felt like he could breathe again he sat down at the small table, put his head in his hands and allowed the tears he’d been choking back to fall. The damaged mage felt like no matter what he did or how much time had passed that he’d never be able to forget being at the mercy of the men who’d attacked him and his heart hurt for the man who’d rescued and vowed to stand with him.

Dean liked spending time with the animals, which surprised him. They hadn’t had horses, dogs, chickens or any kind of animal when he’d been growing up. His father and his uncle traveled by foot between towns and on hunting trips so he only had a passing acquaintance with the horses some of his hunter friends used. Riding was one of the skills a hunter was expected to be proficient in before earning their blades so he’d had lessons and knew a little about their general care and feeding but had never really had to put that knowledge to use until now. He found it relaxing to groom the horses at the end of the day and then turn them out and watch them roll and sometimes frolic after being released from their harnesses. He’d taken to talking to them while he worked and they’d heard all about his love for the mage and listened without judgment to his hopes and prayers for the younger man’s healing. They didn’t even mind when he used them to screen himself as he took his cock in hand and jerked off to relieve the sexual tension that built up in him each day as he looked at and talked to his mage. This daily ritual allowed him to cuddle Sam when necessary without going full on hard and possibly scaring him into a breakdown.

Once Sam had cried himself out he got busy making up the fire, getting water and starting their dinner. He consciously avoided paying too much attention to the interior features of the cabin and concentrated instead on the actual work his hands were doing. Since they had time he was making a dessert as well as the ever present stew for their meal and focused on mixing the dried fruit with hot water and a little sugar to plump them up before he topped them with an oat mixture and put it by the fire to bake. He knew he’d probably have nightmares that night, they seemed to be more frequent and more frightening when they stayed in the cabins. At least they’d be at the library soon, he thought, hopeful that once they weren’t sleeping in a place that reminded him of the attack he could sleep without the memories taking control.

After turning the horses out, Dean checked the cellar for anything else the cabin might have to offer and was pleased to find several bottles of mead from Sam’s priory as well as a few potatoes that were still edible. He figured adding them to the priory stew would at least make it a little different for a change. Dean pushed the door open, his hands full, “Hey, Sammy! Look what I found in the cellar.” Dean put the potatoes and the bottles of mead on the table, “the mead’s even on the cool side from being stored underground.”

“That’s great Dean,” Sam beamed up at the hunter, his tears long gone, “and it will make our last night in a priory cabin a little more like a celebration.

“Are you making dessert too?” Dean peered over the younger man’s shoulder to see what he was working on.

Sam blushed at the attention, but felt none of the dread that usually accompanied his attacks, “Yeah, I figured we stopped early enough tonight to be able to make something a little different. That way we can keep saving the other candies and chocolate,” he looked up at his hunter flashing his dimples in gratitude for the sweets and for the attention.

“Once we’re safe in the library, I’ll figure out a way to keep you in sweets, baby,” Dean laid a gentle hand on the mage’s shoulder careful not to squeeze or to apply too much pressure. “I really like seeing you smile like that,” the hunter turned, aware that too much attention was almost as bad as touch for the mage and grabbed up the other bucket. “Let me go get some wash water and get it heating up. We’ve got time to get cleaned up as well.” 

A shiver passed down Sam’s back at the thought of getting naked in the cabin, even just to wash. He’d been pretty good at remaining at least half clothed at all times even with all the privacy that Dean been careful to provide for him. He knew the hunter would give him the space and time he needed to bathe, but even so he wasn’t sure he could undress and it made him feel broken. He didn’t want to spend the rest of his life trying to avoid triggering the flash backs and memories, but he really didn’t know how to begin to go about making that a reality. He moved the bottles of mead and the few potatoes Dean had found over to the sink area and laid out the travel cloaks, remaining squares of silk and the small bit of soap they had left on the table. Once done he had to walk outside so he didn’t become overwhelmed.

Dean met the mage as he was headed back into the cabin, “did you want to wash up first? It shouldn’t take the water too long to get warm enough.”  
The mage just shook his head no.

“Hey, Sammy, it’s okay if you don’t want to wash up, it’s up to you. You know it doesn’t matter to me either way,” the hunter watched the mage scuffing his boots in the dry dirt outside the cabin not lifting his eyes or turning his head toward the hunter.

“I’m just restless, you go ahead. I’m going to walk around the area a bit. I won’t go far, I just need to work off some energy,” the mage turned and walked away from the cabin.

Dean sighed and wished with all his heart he could reach into the younger man and tear the frightening memories out once and for all. He had definitely gotten better and the hunter knew that he’d continue to improve; it just hurt him to see his love suffering so much. He let himself into the cabin and added some of the warm water in the kettle to the wash bucket and took care of cleaning himself. As he worked the soapy silk down his body he closed his eyes and pretended it was Sam’s hands rubbing his skin with the soft fabric and imagined the golden giant behind him supporting him as he helped him wash. Knowing he was risking Sam walking in on him made him want to hurry and yet added a bit of the forbidden to his bath. He hissed a breath out through clenched teeth as he worked his nipples into hard and sensitive peaks, pinching them lightly and pretending it was Sam’s teeth tugging on them. He was breathing harder, eyes still closed as he moved his hands and the silk wash cloth lower, moaning out loud as he wrapped the silk around his already hard again cock. In his mind, it was his mage’s hand that wrapped around the base of his cock, squeezing lightly as he thrust himself forwarded into the softness of the silk picturing Sam’s long tapering fingers as he did. 

Too far gone to stop even if he wanted to, Dean moved his other hand lower to massage his balls, still heavy even though he jerked himself off once since they stopped. In his mind it was Sam lying between his legs, jacking him with one hand while sucking on each of his balls, rolling them back and forth across his tongue. That thought was all it took and with one more thrust into his silk-clad hand he was coming all over his hand and the table in front of him. He braced himself with one hand as he nursed himself through the strong aftershocks his fantasy had produced. He was in love with the mage and was being truthful when he said he’d wait as long as it took him to be comfortable being touched again. He figured his daily “me time” would have to continue in order to keep him sane until Sam could move on.

Sam walked toward the stable as he thought about his situation, growing more frustrated by the step. He spotted his quarterstaff leaning against the interior wall and decided that it had been too long since he’d worked himself through the exercises and forms that combined to make the quarterstaff a deadly weapon in the right hands. ‘Perfect’ he thought as he grabbed his staff and stepped away from the buildings far enough to give himself the room he needed. He’d been riding shirtless to keep his solar cell charged and so was ready work. He drew a couple of deep cleansing breaths centering his mind on the physical forms of staff work and began to move. 

Once he’d dried off and redressed himself, Dean grabbed the bucket containing the dirty water and left the cabin to drain and refill it at the well. As he walked out the door he was stopped dead in his tracks at the sight of his mage working with his weapon. For a man as large as he was, Sam moved as effortlessly as a dancer on water, flowing easily from one form the next, each movement of the staff either a deadly hit or a successful block. Quarterstaffs were usually the weapon of choice for smaller fighters in order to make their shorter reach less of a liability but in the hands of the Techno-mage, whose arms were already longer than most, the quarterstaff became an even stronger defensive weapon since even the quickest swordsmen would have trouble making it past the spinning staff to land a successful hit on the constantly moving mage. In addition, the staff’s offensive capability was enhanced by the incredible reach, as well as the brute strength, of the young man who wielded it.

The hunter felt himself growing hard again and turned away to take care of the water before he totally embarrassed himself. He knew Sam was well into his workout and wouldn’t have noticed him staring, but he felt like he was invading the man’s private space and didn’t want his mage to feel like his personal space had been breached in any way. Dean changed the water out and let himself back into the cabin with only the briefest look back at the golden giant who was still working on his forms. ‘One day,’ he thought, ‘one day I’ll be able to touch and kiss him all over and then listen to him beg me to fuck him.’

After he finished with his workout, Sam found himself out of breath, sweating profusely from every pore on his body and with his hair matted to his head. His skin glowed pink and red from his increased circulation and he knew he looked like a mess. No way was he going to be able to skip a bath and have Dean want to sleep anywhere near him, much less eat at the same table. He’d have to redress in the same clothes, but at least he could get the dirt and sweat off his skin and out of his hair. 

He let himself into the cabin where he found Dean sitting on the bed reading from the primer he’d given him, his lips moving as he worked out each word. The hunter looked up from his book and smiled, “nice workout Sam, I’ve got water heating for you and I’ll go out and get the animals fed and offer them more water. Open the door when you’re through.” The hunter wanted nothing more at that moment than to lick up one side of the mage’s neck and down the other tasting him in his sweat and he hurried out the door before he convinced himself to act on his thoughts.

As Sam brought the warm water to the table he decided he could wash while wearing his undershorts – he slept in them after all and that hadn’t caused much of an issue and more importantly, it wasn’t naked. He slipped out of his boots and carefully removed his pants. He had to agree with Dean’s estimation that they needed replacing. There was no cleaning method good enough to bring them back to even halfway to wearable, but they were all he had and he needed to make them last until he could make himself new ones. He noticed that Dean had left the silk and his cloak out, along with the soap just like he’d done and that made him smile. Sam knew the hunter was out of his element and trying so very hard to make things easier for him and he really did appreciate everything he did, even if he didn’t have the ability to reciprocate yet.

As he carefully washed away the dirt and sweat from his skin he thought of how gentle Dean had been with him, even before his…..incident. In Dean’s hands, Sam felt like a precious treasure (he knew that was a totally girly thing to think but couldn’t think of a better description), almost like Dean was afraid of breaking him when he touched or held him. This was probably the biggest disconnect for him, he felt that he was no better than a maggot ridden corpse, soiled beyond saving and figured even if the hunter could ever get past the fact that he’d been used until he was so full of and covered with the body fluids of the disgusting creatures who’d kidnapped him that he’d never get past the fact that…… “No!” he spoke out loud in the empty room, “I’m never thinking of that again, never……never!”

After his outburst he applied himself to finishing his bath as quickly as possible, finishing by using the last of the sliver of soap to wash his hair before drying himself with his travel cloak. He squeezed as much of the water from his hair as he could before opening the door and taking the bucket around the side of the cabin to empty the dirty water and draw more from the well. When he returned to the cabin he left the door open and went about checking on the stew and the apple crisp. He’d purchased a very small amount of cinnamon when they’d been in the apothecary and had used a tiny pinch in the oat topping he’d put together for the crisp hoping he might surprise Dean like he’d done for him with the chocolate. 

He suspected he was falling in love with the hunter, but had nothing to compare his feelings to and no one to confide in or ask, so he sent up a prayer to Jobs Gates to help him figure out what his feelings were along with a more fervent prayer that he could heal his mind and find some peace. Once he felt that he’d put enough thought into his prayers he pulled out the ivory comb he’d had since he was an infant. According to the story the priory Masters had told him of his origin, the comb was one of two things that were wrapped up with him when they found him at their gate. He liked to believe it had belonged to his mother and even though he had no memories of either of his parents, using the comb made him feel like he was connected to her and wondered if he’d had enough hair for her to use the comb on him before he’d been abandoned.

Dean entered the cabin as the mage finished his prayers and pulled out his comb. He’d seen him use it before and even knew its origin, but watching Sam now he realized how lucky he’d been to have his father, drunken asshole that he was, and his uncle Bobby, who had been the steadying influence in his life. He couldn’t imagine living as Sam had, not knowing where he came from and always having to wonder why he’d been abandoned. 

“Hey, Sammy, will you let me comb your hair for you?” Dean stood an arm’s length away so as not to crowd the mage and watched him as he carefully considered the request. His eyes were so open that Dean felt like he could see everything the mage felt reflected there, and saw the fear and desire warring with each other. 

“I……don’t……no one’s done that for me since I was small,” Sam very much wanted Dean to touch him; comb his hair for him, but wasn’t sure how to ask for it.

The hunter watched him for another half a minute as the mage continued his inner debate before stepping forward and taking the comb from his hand, “Just relax, Sammy, let me do this for you. I want to do this, to care for you.” Dean used the same voice he did when talking to the animals, low and steady, pitched to soothe and he kept up a steady stream of words as he worked the comb through Sam’s wet hair, “that’s it Sammy, let your head fall back, I’ve got you, baby, close your pretty eyes and let me be here for you.”

Sam breathed in an out a couple of times before he could fully relax both his shoulders enough for his head to fall before he heard Dean move the other chair behind him and felt his hand run through his wet hair loosening up the larger tangles before he began gently working the comb through it section by section. Once his hair was free of tangles he heard the hunter place the comb on the table and then felt him begin to rub his fingertips over his scalp until he was sighing from the pure pleasure of just being touched and not being afraid.

Pleased by how relaxed he was able to make Sam, the hunter pushed his chair back and replaced it at the other side of the table, got two bottles of the mead he’d found from the side board, opened them and brought them both to the table. He placed one of the bottles in front of his mage. “Here’s one of the bottles of mead for you, but don’t feel like you have to rush, relax as long as you want. The food looks fine and I’m just going to read my book until you’re ready to rejoin me. Just be, Sam, don’t think, don’t worry, just be.”

Brother Samuel struggled to keep his mind on the here and now, he could smell their dinner cooking, hear the hunter breathing – he could actually feel the physical presence of the hunter which he found comforting – and hear him turning the pages of the small book. In his mind he could see Dean’s lips moving as his eyes followed his finger across the page carefully sounding out each syllable and then saying the whole word. He’d loved having Dean comb his hair and had felt only the very slightest urge to draw away from the gentle caresses that followed. He sighed again and allowed himself a few more minutes of blissed out peace before opening his eyes.

“Feeling any better?” Dean asked when he noticed the mage reaching for his bottle of mead.

Sam lifted the bottle to his lips and swallowed some of the sweet, crisp liquor before answering, “Yeah, some…..I,” his voice trailed off and he looked down, pretending interest in a bottle he’d seen more times in his life than he could count, “some.”

The hunter sipped from his own bottle and studied the mage, his eyes filled with concern but not talking, not filling room with mindless chatter, content to let his companion work through the tangled threads that bound his mind, in silence. He knew that in the larger scheme of things very little time had passed since Sam was brutalized, and could feel the trauma simmering just below the surface of the young man’s mind, threatening to boil over at any time. The sooner they dealt with the realities of the attack, the sooner the mage could begin the complicated process of healing the wounds to his mind.

“I think dinner’s probably ready,” Sam stood and went to the fire to check on their meal while the hunter got their bowls and spoons set out on the table, “I hope you’re hungry.”

“Always hungry, Sammy,” Dean smiled as Sam dished out their main course and waited for him to join him at the table to begin eating, “It smells great, like always. I don’t think I’ve ever eaten this well this regularly.”

Sam blushed and pushed the food around in his bowl, occasionally lifting his spoon to his mouth, but eating very little. His stomach was tied in knots, his mind worried that this might be the last meal he’d share with the outlaw hunter and that thought almost brought him to tears. He tried to push his fears aside without much success and his smile was half-hearted at best but he knew that he owed Dean the truth and the chance to walk away.

“So, um…..Dean,” Sam bit at his lower lip and was shaking one leg absent-mindedly, “I…..um l….remember I told you that I remember it all?” 

“Yeah, and I told you it didn’t matter and that you didn’t have to talk about it until you were ready,” Dean noticed for the first time that Sam hadn’t really eaten and was obviously struggling more than usual that evening, “are you saying you’re ready, because you don’t look ready.”

“No, I mean yes,” Sam got up and paced the small room, biting at the nail on his thumb, “I mean, I need to tell you something and well, it’s…..,” he sat again, the pacing had just made him more nervous. He grabbed his bottle of mead and took a healthy swallow before continuing. “I…..I mean, you’re…..gods. I’m so sorry, so very sorry….”

“Sam, you don’t have anything to be sorry about, really. No one chooses to be kidnapped and attacked.”

“Not about that, well about that, but not about that part of that….” Sam sighed in frustration and put his head in his hands trying to focus his thoughts, “I’m not saying this right, I don’t know how to say it and I wish you didn’t have to hear it.”

“Gods, Sam whatever it is, I mean that, whatever it is isn’t going to change how I feel about you or what I think about you. You know that right?” Dean was growing concerned, not about what Sam wanted to say, but about how torn up he was about whatever was haunting him. He rose and held his hand out to the mage, “Come on, let’s sit on the bed; let me hold you so you know I’m not going to just walk away.”

The distraught mage allowed Dean to draw him to the bed and into his arms, the arms of the man he was falling for and he felt a rush of fear that he’d soon be left to fend for himself, left alone without a home, friends or a place in society. He struggled not to cry again as he curled himself into the hunter’s arms.

“Sammy, baby, nothing is so bad that we can’t figure out a way to work through it. I know what those men did was beyond horrible, but honestly, baby it doesn’t change what I feel. It just doesn’t matter to me,” Dean held the younger man as close as he could and kissed the top of his head moving his lips down to his forehead, needing Sam to know he was accepted and loved regardless or maybe even because of the things that had happened to him.

Sam’s voice was soft, his words almost lost in the fabric of Dean’s shirt when he started to speak again, “It hurt, I hurt and no one cared. They just kept hurting me, one would finish and another would take his place and whoever wasn’t fucking me was hitting me, pissing on me or coming on me. It went on for hours,” Sam’s voice trailed off as he tried to make himself smaller, tried to get more of Dean’s arms around him.

“Shhhhhhh, baby. It’s okay…..”

“No, Dean, it’s not……it’s really not,” Sam stopped and tried to center himself back in the present but started to shake and his voice broke when he spoke again. “It’s not okay because….Gods this is so difficult.” He took another deep breath before continuing, “Dean, I got hard and…..and then I came, so I must have liked it, right? They said so, they said I liked it, said I liked it rough and they kept trying to make me come again and….and…..they did. I was screaming in pain when my mouth wasn’t stuffed with a cock and I still came. I’m obviously sick, wrong in the head and I don’t want to dirty you, or infect you with my depravity,” Sam was weeping, his head buried in Dean’s shoulder.

“Oh, my baby boy, my poor baby,” Dean held Sam even tighter, even as he tried to pull away, one hand anchoring his head to his shoulder and the other pulling him tightly against his chest. “It really is okay, Sammy.”

Still crying Sam tried to respond, “I don’t know…..”

“Shhhhhh, my turn to talk, baby, just relax.” Dean moved his mouth down to Sam’s ear so he could keep his voice low and his tone steady, “I know it was your first time, Sammy and that it was a truly awful, no, beyond an awful introduction to sex, intercourse. I can’t begin to imagine how scared you were and how badly you hurt. I mean, I saw the aftermath and still can’t comprehend how you held yourself together. You are so brave, so strong,” the hunter pulled his mage even closer, trying to have contact with every part of his body as he soothed him. “Here’s the thing, baby, there’s so much you didn’t….don’t know and one of those is that……that there’s a spot inside us, men, that is super sensitive. I’m sure it has a name and I’m sure you’ll figure that out, but I don’t know what it’s called other than ‘sweet spot’. So there’s this sweet spot that when your…..partner, angles himself just right, he can rub his cock against it on each stroke and when that happens it’s almost impossible to not come on the spot.”

Sam’s crying had tapered off some and he was actively listening to what Dean was saying, but remained skeptical, convinced that he was sick enough to enjoy being gang raped. He did, however keep listening.

“Gods, Sammy, sweetheart, please stop punishing yourself for the way you were made. That spot, the sweet spot, is one of the things that makes sex, fucking, pleasurable for men when they’re together. You couldn’t have stopped yourself from responding, even if you’d known what they were trying to do. It’s your body’s nature, it’s a…….gift and I would give my right arm, truly, my right arm to have been the one to teach you how good that can feel.”

“You…..you’re sure? You’re not just saying that?” Sam pulled back slightly so he could look into the emerald eyes that were looking down at him.

“No, baby I’m not just saying that, I promise. One day Sammy when you’re ready – and that can take as long as you need it to – I will show you. I will show you that it doesn’t have to hurt, that there doesn’t have to be fear and that it’s never degrading, ever. Until that time, until you feel ready, I’m sure we can track down a book or two in the library about how people are put together and maybe even some about sex so that you can read about it for yourself,” Dean smiled at the thought of books about sex and kind of hoped those existed, “until you feel like you want to be with me physically, will you promise me that you will stop feeling bad about the way your body responded?”

Sam was silent as he thought about the facts that the hunter had shared, knowing that he wouldn’t lie to him, but not sure he wouldn’t try to sugar coat the truth as a way to help him accept the way things were. He tried to not feel used and dirty and when he caught Dean looking at him he sometimes succeeded in feeling whole and even special, but knew he’d have to track down the details about this ‘sweet spot’ himself. He wasn’t entirely convinced that he wasn’t perverted in some way, twisted enough to enjoy the torture, but he decided he’d at let it go for the time being, at least until he found out otherwise.

“You okay, baby?” Dean still had his head bent and his mouth at Sam’s ear and his breath across the delicate flesh sent shivers down the mage’s spine and raised goose flesh on his bare arms and chest.

The mage nodded in response and tried to pull even closer, wanting to stay wrapped up in the hunter’s arms, never having to move again, “Yeah, I think.”

“I know you’re going to have to figure it out on your own Sam, you wouldn’t be you if you were any other way,” Dean was smiling as he nuzzled the younger man’s neck. “I promise we’ll work it out.” He felt Sam relax a little more and was pleased he’d been able to talk about the thing that had been eating him alive but knew that it was just the tip of the iceberg – an expression he didn’t really understand, but thought sounded cool.

Sam drew himself out of the embrace, somewhat reassured, but still wary. “Don’t forget, there’s dessert. I put raisins in it for you.” The mage shyly looked over at Dean from under his lashes. “Let me wash the bowls and I’ll get you some.”

“Only if you promise you’ll actually eat yours.” Dean eased himself off the bed and held his hand out to Sam to help him up. “I know you really didn’t eat your dinner.”

“Are you threatening me with no dessert?” Sam actually smiled, “they used to do that with us at the priory when we were kids.”

“Nope, I’m threatening you with no cuddling if you don’t eat your dessert.” Dean tried to look stern and completely failed when Sam turned his full smile on for him.

“Fine, then play chess with me while I eat so that you can keep an eye on me,” the mage knew Dean disliked chess, but he loved the game and was convinced he could get Dean interested if he’d just pick up a few bits of strategy. It was a war game after all.

The hunter let out an exaggerated sigh, “Okay, you win. We’ll play chess even though it’s barely a challenge for you to play against me.”

“The challenge comes from trying to get you to play better,” Sam was dishing up the apple crisp he’d made while Dean set up their chessboard.

Dean laughed, “Good luck with that, my Uncle Bobby tried for years and it just didn’t take.” He took the bowl Sam handed him and inhaled before taking a bite. “It smells different.”

“Taste it and see what you think, I added something,” the mage watched the hunter carefully as he blew on a spoonful of the dessert to cool it down before tasting it. He loved watching his hunter eat, he was so passionate about everything he ate and he figured he’d be that passionate with all of his senses.

The hunter closed his eyes as he put the spoon into his mouth, letting the fruit and oat mixture sit briefly on his tongue before chewing and swallowing. “There is something different. It’s almost spicy, but not hot.” He took another spoonful and repeated the action. “I have no idea what you did, but I like it…..a lot.”

Sam was beaming; pleased he’d been able to surprise the older man, particularly after his confession, he found he wanted to give his companion the very best of everything. He still felt like he owed him for everything he’d done for him since the attack, “I’m glad you like it. I added cinnamon. I don’t even know where that comes from, but it’s really good with apples. That apothecary had some and I bought a little bit with the other things we needed. I hope that’s okay?”

“Of course it’s okay, Sam. Those crowns are yours and you don’t need to ask my permission for anything, but especially not for spending the money your priory gave you.” Dean continued to eat his dessert taking really small bites so he could make it last longer. “I really like this cinnamon stuff, thank you for thinking of it.” He moved one of his pawns starting their game.

The mage studied the board, an act at this point just to give him time to watch the hunter eat and moved one of his own pawns before speaking, “I just want to show you, give everything. I’ve never met anyone like you and I’m…..I wouldn’t be able to………..to go back to what I was before meeting you.”

Dean moved a second pawn, “that’s what I feel about you too Sam and for the time being, neither one of us is going anywhere without the other if I have anything to say about it.”

Sam was able to take the pawn and launched into an explanation as to why it was the wrong pawn to move at that point which Dean listened to half-heartedly, more interested in whether or not there was more dessert and whether or not his mage was really feeling better or if he was putting on an act for his benefit. The game went quickly even with Dean making one of his better efforts and it was soon time to put the animals in the barn and buckle down the cabin for the night.

When the hunter returned from the stable his mage was tucked into bed like usual. He’d secured the fire for the night and the dishes had been done so that all that was left was concealing the cabin and putting out the lantern which took Dean no time at all. He was soon slipping under the blankets and cloaks and pulling his mage to his chest. The younger man draped himself over Dean like another blanket and tucked his head into one of his shoulders. Dean’s arms wrapped around him without a second thought and he breathed in the scent of his freshly washed hair as he relaxed.

“Dean?”

“Sammy?”

“That was the truth, right? What you said,” Sam’s voice was small and quiet in the stillness of the cabin.

“Yeah, baby boy, it’s the truth, I promise,” Dean ran one of his hands down the mage’s back coming to rest at his waist. He’d felt his mage shiver at the contact. “And, Sammy, I will never hurt you, I could never hurt you and anyone who wants to try will have to go through me first. You’re mine, my love and while I’m alive I will protect you from anything and everyone.”

“I……,”

“I know, baby. Sleep now,” the hunter traced a line of butterfly light kisses on his mage’s brow before pulling him even closer, “I’ve got you Sam and I’m not letting go.”


	20. Vindication

Sam rose before the sun, fully rested for the first time since his attack. If he had dreamed at all during the night he didn’t remember the dreams and none of them had been terrifying enough to wake him up. He built up the fire, put the apple crisp close enough to warm it and set water to heat for tea before going to feed and water their animals. His mind wandered back to the night before and his painful confession. He hoped he could find some books at the library on anatomy so he could verify Dean’s explanation for himself. Despite Dean’s words the night before and his peaceful sleep he still felt a little dirty and cringed inwardly every time the hunter touched or kissed him because he didn’t want to pass the stain on to someone he cared about. He decided before he researched anything else in the library he’d look to see if he could verify Dean’s ‘sweet spot’ and until then he’d do his best to trust that the explanation was accurate and try not to dwell on the lingering feeling of uncleanliness.

The hunter had felt Sam slip from their bed early instantly missing his warmth and the sound of his breathing, but was content to settle back into the blankets and let his mind drift for a bit. He’d always hated getting up and would postpone it as long as possible, even as a child, pulling the blankets close and squeezing his eyes shut in an effort to extend the sense of peace and relaxation he’d always felt in bed. When he thought about what Sam had endured at the hands of Terry and his gang he felt sick and angry that despite all the education available at the priory that no one had bothered to teach Sam about sex and wondered if that was just how things were where Sam was raised or it was prevalent across the entire priory system. Either way, the lack of any kind of sex education had caused his mage to feel more shame than he’d had to and that was enough to give Dean yet another reason to dislike the distance the priories kept from the rest of humanity. He opened his eyes when he heard the door close.

“Morning, I thought you were gonna sleep all day,” Sam smiled, enjoying the site of the shirtless and bed-headed hunter. “I’m reheating our dessert for breakfast, better hurry if you want some.”

Dean waited until the mage’s back was turned to slip from bed and into his pants, not wanting the younger man have to see his morning arousal and ducked outside to relieve himself, “you’d better save some for me Sammy!” he called as he left the room.

They sat down to eat after Dean returned to the room and finished dressing for the day. The hunter unsuccessfully tried to give the younger man the larger portion before relenting and digging in, “how is it possible that this is even better today? That is magic, right?” Dean flashed his best smart ass smile at the mage to support the now long standing joke between them.

“In a way, it really is magic, just of the cooking kind,” Sam smiled back and continued, “allowing foods to ‘rest’ a while after cooking allows the flavors to blend better and to mellow a bit. It’s cooking magic.”

“Might just be my favorite kind of magic then,” the hunter was again taking small bites of the dessert trying to make it last longer. 

“So you think we’ll be at the library tonight?” 

Dean paused, his spoon halfway to his mouth to think before answering, “I think so I didn’t have a map or that compass thing when I was there the last time so I’m just going by memory. It can’t be too much farther though, I’m sure we’re far enough west. If we don’t get there today we’ll find it tomorrow, we’ll just have to sleep rough tonight if we have to.”

“I don’t mind sleeping outside, I’m kind of done with priory cabins,” Sam was scraping his bowl clean as he spoke, “too many memories.”

“Shit, Sam! I’m sorry, I didn’t think. You should have said something,” Dean looked up and over at the mage ashamed of not having considered what staying in the cabins might have cost in terms of his recovery, “you know it wouldn’t have mattered to me where we slept.”

“I know Dean, but the cabins did have things we could use,” Sam looked over at the hunter, his face open and earnest, “besides, it wasn’t so bad since you were with me and I knew you wouldn’t let anything else happen.”

The hunter pushed his bowl aside, got up and pulled the mage into an embrace, “Gods, Sammy, you must think I’m an idiot. Please promise you’ll tell me when you’re uncomfortable or when I do something that completely bone-headed again. I’m…..I haven’t spent much time around others since my father and uncle disappeared and I’ve never cared for anyone else this much. I generally suck at any kind of relationship and……. I really don’t want to mess this up.” 

“All right, I promise. Now finish your breakfast so we can get going. We might find the library today!” Sam broke into his brightest smile at the thought.

“I can’t wait for you to see it, Sam. My description of it doesn’t do it justice, I just don’t have the right words,” Dean finished his breakfast and rinsed his bowl before packing it away, “I’ll go get the horses saddled and we can get on our way.”

“Already done, we’ll just have to fill our water skins. Another reason the cabins were important. The priories dug wells at all of them.”

“Not too anxious to get there are you?” Dean went to get the water while Sam tightened the cinches and brought the horses around to the well where they were given another chance to drink their fill.

“We’re getting so close, I can’t really stop thinking about what we’ll find there,” Sam mounted his horse and secured the pack pony’s lead to his saddle while he waited for Dean.

Dean watched the mage as his horse finished drinking and felt his stomach flutter. He couldn’t remember ever feeling so strongly about another person, even his father and hoped he was doing the right thing for the young mage and at the same time, despite the fact that he’d torn him out of his comfortable life, exposed him to the criminals who’d attacked him and allowed him to break him out of the priory prison, he somehow felt like the risks they were both taking were worth it. If he could, he’d change the fact that Sam had suffered at the hands of the other hunters, but since he couldn’t, he’d just try to love him enough to help him move past it.

They’d been traveling for a few hours when Sam stopped abruptly and silenced Dean when he had started to ask why. Sam pulled himself inward and tapped into his will with a trickle of stored energy and sent his senses out over the general area trying to find what had caught his attention. 

Dean watched as the mage become still and silent, almost preternaturally so, amazed at what he could do with his mind even if he didn’t really understand it any better than he had when they first met. After getting to know him better, the hunter trusted him implicitly and knew there wasn’t a bad bone in the mage’s body so he waited patiently to find out what the mage had heard.

“Dean! There’s a mage in trouble about a quarter mile to the east,” Sam dismounted and pulled the horse and pony closer to a couple of stunted scrub trees. “We’ll go on foot, it’s quieter, but we need to move.” He grabbed his quarterstaff as he waited for the hunter to dismount.

“How many?”

“Five to one, hunters I think, but I can’t tell the difference between demons and hunters with my mind. Be prepared for either.” Sam moved out and Dean almost had to jog to keep up with other’s long strides.

Dean could hear voices as they got closer, something was clearly taunting the mage and threatening him or her with rape before they took the head. He looked over at his partner to see how he was holding up and was startled by the hard look on his face, the mage was determined even in the face of the hunters. Keeping his voice low and speaking into Sam’s ear, Dean mapped out their strategy which was acknowledged with just a nod.

Drawing Honor and Courage the hunter stepped behind the others, “Hey mother-fuckers! When did it start taking five hunters to get one lousy mage? You assholes need to train a little harder, here I’ll help.” He stepped forward and engaged two of the others, his katanas flashing in the sunlight as he advanced.

While Dean had the attention of the hunters, Sam swept in and pulled the mage away from his cart so he would have a better chance with his own quarterstaff. The confused mage looked from the giant cyborg who’d pulled him out of the center of the fight to the hunter who had engaged his own kind and wasn’t quite sure what he was seeing, but smart enough to not stop to question the men who were saving his ass.

“Get to cover if you want, we can handle this.” Sam pushed the other mage behind him as he advanced on the closest hunter his staff moving so fast it was nearly impossible to see.

The unfortunate hunter didn’t notice Sam until he was on top of him and his staff was caving in the right side of his skull. That action drew the attention of two of the remaining four who were almost as confused as the mage had been by the appearance of the golden giant. Sam easily knocked away two of the katanas approaching him and had broken one wrist. He had to give the one hunter a little credit since he kept advancing despite the pain the broken wrist had to be causing. The mage allowed them to get a little closer, drawing them in with a feint to the left. He caught the lead hunter with the back stroke of his staff under his chin and broke his neck. His remaining opponent faltered as he watched his compatriot go down in a boneless heap, his inattention to his attacker proved to be fatal for him as well. Before he could turn to mount any kind of defense the mage drove his staff into his nose forcing his facial bones into his brain and killing him instantly.

Meanwhile Dean had his two opponents engaged in a little bit of cat and mouse. They hadn’t realized yet that the mouse they were toying with would prove to be their undoing. Dean used a series of feints and straight out attacks to separate the two and then to bring them back together. After he did this a couple of times the other two hunters began to get confused about who was friend and who was foe and had to slow down their blades to avoid taking each other out. Out of the corner of his eye, he watched Sam take down his third hunter and knew he’d have to step up his game or be left out of the kill count completely.

Sam stopped just long enough to admire the speed and agility of his hunter before he started to move toward the two hunters that were engaged with Dean. He knew he could get at least one of them down before they even knew he was there and he wanted nothing more than to watch another one of the bastards go down in a storm of blood and brains. Ever since realizing the men attacking the mage were hunters and not demon ridden unfortunates Sam saw the faces of the men who’d violated him on each one he brought down, each hunter representing all four of the mother-fuckers and Sam was able to kill them over and over and over again.

The approach of his partner distracted the two he was engaged with and allowed Dean to behead one of them before he never knew what was happening to him. The hunter jumped away from the falling corpse and looked up to see his mage take out the last piece of shit with a solid hit to the side of his head. Sam had put enough strength into the hit that all that was left of the man’s head was a smear on the ground as the staff plowed through the soft tissue.

Sam fell back into a defensive posture after killing the man in front of him and looked around for anyone else stupid enough to get inside the kill zone of his staff. He was dripping with sweat, breathing heavy; his nostrils flaring with each breath, his eyes hard and his muscles tense and ready to spring.  
The hunter watched his love closely as his eyes raked across the battleground, alert for any indication that he would lapse into a state of panic when he realized the extent of his destruction. Dean carefully cleaned his blades on the shirt of one of the downed men before sheathing them and collecting the abandoned weapons, still looking over at his mage while he moved through the dead.

“Hey Sammy, you okay?” Dean was still moving and concentrating on not staring at the other man but was able to see the moment the battle rage that had gripped Sam began to subside. “You,” the hunter called out to the other mage, “give me a hand getting these bodies together.”

The mage looked around to make sure the hunter had been talking to him before making his legs carry him over to help with the clean-up, “What…..”

“Explanations later, let’s get this cleaned up and give him a chance to calm down a bit,” Dean indicated Sam with a jerk of his head and the two men dragged the bodies and the one head out of Sam’s sight. Dean grabbed a water skin from the mage’s cart ignoring his stammered outrage at his breach of manners and slowly approached his mage, “Come on, Sam. It’s over, come here and have a drink.”

Sam blinked a few times as Dean’s voice filtered through the red rage that had been clouding his mind and shook his head as if he could shake the rest of it off. “Dean?”

“Yeah Sammy, right here, you were unbelievable,” Dean handed the younger man the water skin and carefully took the quarterstaff from his hands and set it aside, “Let’s sit a couple of minutes, that was a work out and a half,” he guided the mage to the cart and they sat on the edge.

The other mage was staring at the two of them with his mouth open, but unable to comprehend exactly what he was seeing. He wanted nothing more than to grab his pony and move away from the strange twosome, but he was afraid to ask them to get up and so just leaned against the cart and listened to them speak.

“It’s over right?” Sam looked sideways at the hunter sitting next to him while he took a few sips from the water skin before passing it back.

Dean drank before he spoke, “Yeah it’s over. You got ‘em, four of them. I only took one down.”

“I saw the others Dean, I was killing the others.” Sam’s voice was quiet. He’d never before felt the level of rage that had overtaken him and it was overwhelming. “I wasn’t sure I could stop.”

The hunter put an arm around the mage’s shoulders. “But you did and you saved that other mage. You Sam, you saved him. You didn’t need me. Where is that guy anyway?” Dean looked around the bloodied area and almost jumped when he realized the other mage was right behind him. “Don’t do that! Announce your presence for fuck’s sake.”

Sam started to laugh at Dean’s outrage and imitated him so perfectly that Dean had to laugh as well. The other mage was certain they were insane and was getting ready to just abandon his cart when Sam spoke to him, “What priory are you from? Why are you off the road?”

“The Priory of Assisi, wait, where are you from and what are you doing with a hunter?”

“I’m from Scion and none of your business.”

Dean looked at his mage surprised at his tone but quickly realizing he was worried the other mage would mention seeing them and set off alarms across the priory system and maybe the guild system as well. “Look buddy, we just saved your ass so let’s just all go back to our lives and forget this meeting. You can do that, right?”

The mage from Assisi looked from the giant cyborg to his friend and back, weighing his options. He was certain his masters would want to hear of a cyborg mage traveling with a hunter, but he wasn’t sure he’d want to chance meeting either of the two men sitting on his cart in a dark market or a deserted stretch of road, “Fine, you did save me and you’re not taking my head for yourself so I guess we can call it even. If you get off the cart I’ll move on and forget I’ve ever seen you, either of you.”

Sam stood and turned to the other mage, “thank you, we won’t forget your kindness. There’s a cabin about 3 ½ hours walk to the west of here and it will put you back on the road. May Jobs Gates guide your travels.”

The other mage shook his head and clicked his tongue to get his pony moving, hurrying away from the battleground and the strangers who had confused him. He waved a hand over his head as an afterthought.

“Come on Sam, let’s get back to our horses and get moving again. It’s library day!”

The mage laughed at the hunter’s raised eyebrow and they walked back in the direction they’d come. “Think he’ll stay quiet?”

Dean shrugged, “even if he doesn’t, he’s days away from a priory and we’ll be secure underground by then. I’m not kidding when I say this place isn’t easy to find.” They walked a little farther before Dean spoke again, “you know, you really kicked ass back there. You’re so…..you that I sometimes forget just how deadly you can be. If those fucktards hadn’t surprised you, you’d have taken them, I have no doubt. You are one bad ass mother-fucker and I’m so glad you’re on my side.” The hunter looked over at his friend to make sure he hadn’t taken anything he said the wrong way and was pleased to see him smiling.

“I think the horses are over there, the ground looks trampled,” Sam pointed to the trees he vaguely remembered seeing before stalking off after the hunters. “You’re not too bad yourself. I don’t ever want to get inside the radius of your blades.”

“You’d have me, Sammy. Your reach with the staff out guns even the best blade master, I can’t think of anything other than a ranged weapon that would stop you.” Dean was sincere in his praise. His mage was a truly remarkable and deadly as fuck fighter.

They found the horses, trigged the concealment devices and were mounted up and on their way before Dean spoke again, “So…. I think we make a pretty good team, don’t you?”

Sam considered the question for a minute or two, making sure the hunter wasn’t just placating him but couldn’t find any trace of insincerity in the other man’s words. “Yeah, I think we do.”

“Imagine what we’ll be able to achieve with the library at our disposal, with your mind and my instinct….unbeatable. I’ve told you before I don’t worship a god or actually have much belief in them, but Sammy I’ll be damned if I don’t think that we were somehow meant to meet that day with kobolds. You know, like destiny,” Dean looked to make sure Sam wasn’t rolling his eyes at his admission but his glance was met with the open intelligent gaze he’d come to depend on. “Now let’s find this library and get started.”

“Started? Started doing what?” Sam kicked his horse into a trot to keep up with Dean.

“Saving this god-forsaken world, Sammy one fucking demon at a time.”


	21. Library

They didn’t end up finding the entrance to the library until midmorning the next day. The entrance had been well disguised and no one without prior knowledge of the place would ever think that the rusting relic from an earlier age was anything more. Even Sam was skeptical when Dean pointed it out. They secured their horses and activated the concealment devices before approaching the door.

“So you were backed up against this? What made you think you could open it?” Sam was inspecting the doorway trying to see if he could determine where the hinges or joints were located, “it seems like a solid piece of metal.”

The hunter joined him at the doorway, “I didn’t really think anything. I was bleeding and I was losing, my only thought was ‘shit, here’s where I die’. The door opening was a complete surprise to me and it took me a while to figure out how to get it open again when I returned with your book.”  
Dean ran his hands over the doors surface, his fingertips searching for recessed and difficult to see handle, “the latch is right in here. Let’s see if it opens for you,” Sam kind of rolled his eyes, but stepped forward, “I’m curious. I know the demons couldn’t get the door open, but I wasn’t sure whether that was because the latch is hard to find or because it’s demon-proof or something.” 

“Demon-proof, really? Have you ever heard of anything that’s demon-proof?” The mage was only half teasing he’d never heard of a way to demon-proof a structure. He was certain there would be quite a market for demon-proofing if it existed.

“Well, no, but I’ll bet there’s a lot we don’t know, or at least that’s what you’re always saying the techno-mages believe,” Dean raised his eyebrows and waited for the mage to contradict him.

“Okay, you’ve got me there. Where’s this latch?”

Dean showed Sam the latching mechanism and stood back to let the mage have a try at opening the door. He wasn’t sure whether or not he wanted the door to work for the mage. He thought it was kind of cool that he might be the only person capable of getting the door to the hidden library open and so was pleased when the door didn’t open for Sam.

“I wonder if it opened for you the first time because you were bleeding, that somehow the door recognized your blood.” Sam walked through the door and onto a narrow landing.

“I don’t know, could that even happen? I mean, it’s blood, we all have it. The panel to the right is what I touched to turn the lanterns on. See if you can do it.” Dean held the doorway open to provide enough light for Sam to see the panel he was talking about.

“Yeah, I see it.” Sam reached out and touched the small panel to right of the door. The lanterns turned on and lit up the interior. “That’s amazing. I wonder how that works.”

“Do you think the animals will be OK for a bit?”

“I don’t see why not and they’re not going to walk down these stairs. We’ll have to see if there are other ways in and out of this place or find some kind of shelter for them in the area if we plan to keep them.” Sam turned and started to walk down the stairs while Dean closed the door. The mage stopped dead in his tracks when he reached the bottom, looking from one side to the other, his mouth hanging open, unable to speak.

Dean joined him at the bottom and smiled at the look on the mage’s face, “I told you you’d be amazed. I was right wasn’t I? None of you techno-mages have ever seen anything like this.”

The mage walked into the room touching tables and chairs as he moved toward the first set of bookcases. There were more books in one bookcase than some priories owned and even more surprising was the fact that they seemed to be in good condition. He very carefully took one of the books down and just held it for a few moments. He then closed his eyes and brought the book to his nose and sniffed, “Incredible, this is incredible, there is no sign of insect damage or smell of mold from water damage. How is that even possible?” He replaced the first book and pulled a second one from the shelf, this time actually opening it and fanning the pages. “These are in almost perfect condition. I wonder if all the books are like this. Dean, you have no idea what kind of miracle this is.” Sam pulled out one of the chairs and sat down placing the book before him on the table.

“I knew you’d like this place, no, I knew you’d love this place. Wait until you see the rest of what I found. I’d bet there’s no other place on earth like this,” Dean sat down next to the mage and looked over at the pages he was turning. “Can you read that?”

“Some, it’s a little like Latin, but not exactly. I can read parts of some words, like this one is ‘holy’ or ‘blood’, the Latin root is similar so I’d have to know context. The drawings in this book alone are unbelievable.” Sam turned another few pages and stopped at a picture of a crucified man with smoke pouring out of his mouth. “This one is very much like what happens when a demon leaves a host, but I’m not sure why crucifixion is involved. There’s so much here to learn. I wonder how many different languages are represented here. If I could find a book in a language I’m familiar with, I might be able to start making comparisons and figure out at least the rudiments of some of the other languages.”

Dean shook his head at the flood of words pouring from the mage’s mouth, many of them he didn’t really know, but he got the general idea that his mage was overwhelmed. He stood up and motioned for Sam to do the same. “Over here are the other books like the one you were working on at the priory. I put that one here with the others,” he led Sam across the room to another, smaller set of bookcases. These had doors that had glass inserts, “see, they are all the same type of book.”

The mage opened the bookcase doors carefully and removed the book he’d worked with and then two of the others. The hunter was right, they were the same size, smaller than many of the other books he could see on the shelves and bound in soft leather of some sort, just like his was. Clips down the middle of the spine allowed the owner to add and remove pages as necessary and the pages in all three books held a similar type of parchment that was thinner than what was currently available and had lines drawn on them allowing for the writer to keep his words in neat rows. They were handwritten, by different people judging from the writing style, but the language was similar, “These I think I can read and what I can’t currently read, using the other books like this as a comparative baseline, I can probably work out the rest,” Sam put the two other books back, but held on to the one he’d been assigned at the priory. He turned to Dean and looked him in the eyes, “I can’t believe how much you risked by bringing me here and there is no way I can repay you for showing me this place, this library. Seriously, if I die tomorrow, I’ll be content for having seen this.”

“Nobody’s dying tomorrow, I didn’t just drag your ass here to have you up and die on me. That’s how you can repay me, don’t die. I’m not ready for that.” The hunter pulled his eyes away from the mage’s penetrating stare and moved across the room. “Come here and look at these weapons they have hanging on the wall, I don’t know what they are.”

“Why do you do that?”

“Do what? What do you think these are for?” Dean was still staring at the rifles that were mounted on the wall and very deliberately not looking at his mage.

“Change the subject when I’m thanking you or offering praise? Do you think you don’t deserve it? You do it all the time.” Sam, still holding on to his book moved across the room and joined the hunter in front of the display. “There’s nothing wrong with accepting gratitude or praise, especially when it’s deserved.”

Dean wanted to leave the room. He was uncomfortable with both gratitude and praise. In his experience no one ever offered either of those two expressions up without an ulterior motive. He didn’t think Sam was manipulative in any sense of the word, but still had the instantaneous gut reaction to push the positive words aside, to negate their impact and he struggled to not offer evidence to the contrary. “I don’t know and I don’t want to talk about it. Do you know what these weapons are? I assume they’re weapons of some sort, they’re displayed like you would your blades.”

“All right, I’ll let it go……for now, but I’ll ask again. To answer your question, no, I don’t know what they are or what they do, but I think you’re right in assuming they are some kind of weaponry, but that’s more of an instinct than actual knowledge on my part. Maybe there are some books that explain about them.” Dean lifted one of the rifles off the wall. “Careful! You don’t know what that does!”

“It’s heavy, made of some kind of metal and it has a sight. I think it is a ranged weapon, maybe something along the lines of a crossbow that fires a projectile?” The hunter had the rifle up to his eye and was sighting down the barrel, “this seems like a triggering mechanism,” he pointed to the trigger.

“Fine, good, let’s put it down before you do something to trigger it and hurt one or both of us, please?” Sam had moved out of the line of sight as he tried to convince the hunter to put the weapon they didn’t understand, down.

Sighing the hunter put the rifle back on the wall where he’d found it. “Hopefully we’ll learn more about these. Let me show you the thing about the water, you won’t believe it.” Dean headed out of the room and around the corner while Sam followed, smiling at Dean’s enthusiasm.

The next room they entered was large and fairly open and there were shelves along the walls that held plates and cups, some of them made of glass, along with various bowls and kettles. The floor was patterned with black and white alternating squares and the counters lining the walls were some kind of metal, as was the sink. It was the sink that Dean wanted to show Sam. There was some kind of spout, like that of a fountain, over the opening with a handle on either side. Dean reached out and turned one of the handles. There was a clanking and sputtering sound that caused Sam to step back but then there was water pouring from the spout, it was discolored at first, but began to clear while it ran.

“Isn’t this the best?” Dean looked over at his friend who was just as captivated by the sight, “the water just appears, then you can make it stop, by turning the handle back,” he did just that and stopped the flow.

“What’s the second handle for? Did you try to turn that one?” Sam moved up close to the spout and was trying to look inside of it to see where the water might have come from.

“Back up, it does the same thing,” Dean demonstrated by turning the other handle. Again there were knocks and some clanking before the water began to flow again. The water was discolored, but as before, seemed to clear as it ran.

“What if you turn both at the same time?”

Dean reached over and turned the other handle again which caused the water to run even faster, “I think they’re the same thing.”

“No,” Sam was looking more closely at the handles, “this one has a ‘C’ on it and this one has an ‘H’. Maybe two different water sources, like ‘contaminated’ and ‘healthy’.”

“Or maybe the ‘C’ stands for clean,” Dean joined Sam at the sink and they stood just watching the water run, “I wonder where it goes?”

“There are pipes under here so it’s draining away somewhere. Maybe we better shut it off in case it’s filling up a room or something. Besides, it’s wasteful since we’re not even using the water,” Sam was still looking at the configuration of pipes under the sink trying to determine where they came from and where they led, “It looks like when you turn the handles you are drawing water from a source, but what source and how exactly? I hope they have some books about this place. It will take a couple of lifetimes to figure everything out. Like what is that box in the corner that’s humming?”

“I know, I noticed it before, but didn’t open it.”

“That was probably smart, who knows what’s in there making that sound. It will be better that there are two of us, one to open it and the other to grab whatever’s in there. It doesn’t sound like it’s happy,” Sam walked over to the box and put his hand on top, “Dean, come here. It’s vibrating.”

“What is this place, Sammy?”

“More than a library, let’s see what else we can find. First though, look in the drawers and see if there are candles or something like that.”

“Why would you need candles or lanterns here? There are these glowing things all over,” Dean started opening drawers and looking anyway.

Sam was doing the same, there were a lot of drawers in the room, “we don’t know what makes them glow. What if they stop? I’ll bet it gets pretty dark down here without them.”

“Shit! You’re right. I’ll go check in the other room.” Dean left and went back to the large room with the books and began searching drawers and cabinets. It wasn’t too long before he found a cabinet filled with candles of various sizes, shapes and colors, “found them in here,” he called out and Sam joined him. “Have you ever seen so many different ones before?”

“No, I’m used to the beeswax ones we used in the priory. Grab a few and we’ll have them just in case we lose the light.” Sam took a couple of the larger ones. “I can light them with my will, it doesn’t take that much energy. We need to think about bringing our supplies in before it gets dark as well, the horses can stay where they are for the time being, but hopefully we’ll find a better solution soon.”

“I didn’t go down that hall over there.” Dean indicated another doorway across the library, “let’s see what’s there first and then we can bring in our things. We can always sleep here in this main room tonight if we have to.”

“Okay, lead the way let’s see what else we’ve stumbled on.”

The hallway led to a series of bedrooms and a large tiled room with sinks on one wall, a couple of enclosed spaces with what looked like sieves attached to the walls along with the ‘C’ and ‘H’ handles like they’d found at the other sinks. Across the room from the sinks were a few enclosed stalls with basins attached to the floor, these did not have the handles marked ‘C’ and ‘H’ but there did appear to be a handle of some sort attached to each one.

“What do you think this place is Sam?” Dean was poking his head into all the enclosed spaces which were identical in every detail.

Sam turned each handle on the sinks so that water was flowing from them all. “Some kind of water room? Maybe people washed in here or washed their clothing, you could probably put your clothes in one of these,” Sam walked over to a shower and turned the handles waiting out the clanking and bangs until water started to come from the shower head, “see, the water flows out of this sieve thing so you could hang your clothes on it and they’d get rinsed clean.”

“Or you could put yourself in there,” Dean walked across the room to watch the water in the shower, “you could get wet from top to bottom all at the same time, that’s pretty cool. It’s a lot better than buckets, the dirt just washes away and you don’t have to change or reuse the water.” Dean put his hand under the spray of water, “Hey, it’s not that cold!”

Sam put his hand under the water as well, “Okay, what the hell? And where is it coming from? Turn it off Dean, we don’t know how much there is, we might be wasting it all.” Sam moved to the sinks and turned them off while Dean shut the showers down.

“I want to try that. I’m going to stand under that water, it’s like rain only not contaminated,” Dean’s eyes were wide and he was smiling at the thought of all that water hitting his body at one time.

“Not contaminated that we know of,” Sam reminded the hunter.

“It doesn’t have that weird smell that the standing water outside does,” Dean really wanted to try standing in the rain, “maybe it’s a well, like the priories and towns have.”

Sam couldn’t help but smile at the hunter. He understood the appeal of standing under a waterfall of fresh, clean water. Sharing wash water was an all too common occurrence even in the inns that offered baths since it was just too precious to not get the most of each bucket. “How about this, we don’t use this water tonight, we’ll drink what we brought and tomorrow we’ll see if we can’t trace the pipes to their source. If it turns out that it’s from a well and not surface water, we can test it. I have a few of the strips the priories use to tell if water is safe to drink. If it’s safe to drink, you can stand in the rain.”

“You too, Sam, you have to try it, too. We may never get another chance!” Dean was a little giddy at the thought of all the water.

“Yes, me too, but then we probably still have to be careful with the water, we don’t want to use it up. I’m not sure how we’d get another well dug down here or if that’s even possible,” the mage felt kind of bad having to be the voice of reason, but he really wanted to spend time in this library and if that meant they had to conserve their resources, then they would. “I want to stay here for a while with you Dean.”

The hunter moved closer, wanting to hug Sam, but still worried about triggering a panic attack if he moved too quickly or caught the mage off guard. “I want that too.” He laid one of his hands on Sam’s arm and pulled him into his arms and into a gentle hug. He smiled as he felt the other man’s arms tighten and pull him closer.

They stood for a couple of minutes lost in the comfort of the embrace, seeking the easy familiarity of each other particularly in such a strange new environment. Dean spoke first, “Let’s get the supplies unloaded and see what we can do with the horses. Then I want to figure out what these other basins are for. In fact, I’ll cook if you want to see if you can figure it out.”

“Deal. Then tomorrow we’ll try to find the water source, figure out a better way to keep the animals, explore the rest of this place and read……okay, maybe not all that in one day.” Sam’s smile was a big as Dean’s had been at the thought of a shower and he started to laugh. “We can make that our first week’s goal.”


	22. Discoveries

By the time they’d unloaded their supplies and belongings and got everything put away, they were both getting hungry. They decided that the room with the first sink and black and white floor must be the kitchen area based on the cookware, plates, bowls and cutlery they found stored there. The humming box they left alone for the time being and Sam left Dean to try to figure out how to cook dinner, glad he’d offered, and went to see if he could find any plans for the building, he remembered seeing flat drawers in one section of the library itself and thought they could be there.

Dean was sorry he’d volunteered to cook as he looked around the designated kitchen area trying to determine where he could safely start a fire. There didn’t appear to be any means of ventilation in the room and he knew better than to set a fire without a way for the smoke and fumes to escape. So he walked around the room examining every surface while steering wide of the still humming box, trying to determine if there was a fireplace or some kind of vent that was hidden. His attention was caught by another box, this one quiet, with a door on the front that opened to a space containing racks and that had four spirals on the top surface with five dials along the back. Four dials were labeled with words, words Dean wasn’t sure of, and one dial had numbers, high numbers starting at 200 and going to 500 in increments of 25. He turned the dial with the numbers to 350 but nothing happened. He tried turning it higher and it still seemed as though nothing was happening. He left the numerical dial at 400 and turned one of the other dials as far as it would go. Nothing happened. Frustrated he turned to assess their food situation to see if he could put something together that didn’t require cooking.

 

The mage had better luck in the library having found some drawings which appeared to match up to what they’d already seen. The language was old, but similar to that in the book he’d been studying so he was able to make out most of the words. Sam was astonished at how big the actual structure was and realized that he and Dean had only seen a very small percentage of the place. They had correctly identified the main library, the kitchen and some of the many bedrooms the place contained. He did a quick count and realized there were enough rooms to accommodate fifty people with one per bedroom or one hundred if they doubled up. The strange water room was labeled on the plans as a bathroom, which made sense even if it didn’t contain bathtubs and there were several of those spread out through the complex. The basins bolted to the floor were called toilets; which wasn’t a word Sam was familiar with and didn’t help much in identifying what their purpose was, but the mage, used to experimentation, went back to the bathroom to see if he could figure out what a toilet did.

Back in the kitchen, Dean had found some of the last travel bars they had from the priories along with some nuts and the dried fruits they’d found in the cabins. Not as nice as the dinner Sam had made the other day, but it would at least fill them up. He wished he could boil some water for tea but did have one bottle of wine left that he figured they could drink that night in celebration of finally getting to the library. When he turned from the shelves where they’d put their limited supplies he nearly dropped everything in his hands. One of the spirals on the box across the room was glowing red. He put the food and wine on the table and approached the box very cautiously. He’d never seen anything quite like it before and didn’t understand what had happened. As he got closer to the glowing spiral and the box he began to feel an increase in temperature which continued to rise the closer he got. Once he was right in front of the now hot box, he held his hand out over the glowing spiral. It was hot! Really hot and he was glad he hadn’t decided to touch it. He carefully opened the door on the front of the box and found that the interior had heated up as well and that here was another set of glowing bars at the bottom. He no longer immediately thought that magic was the cause of every unexplained event, so figured it was some kind of technology, but had never heard of anything like it. He had to find Sam and show him. If anyone knew what it was, it would be a techno-mage.

Sam walked back along the hallway with the bedrooms and stopped at the one where he’d put his few things, Dean had put his in the next room. The mage still wasn’t sleeping all that well and knew that he woke Dean at least once a night due to his nightmares, but wished they could still share a bed. Having the solid mass of the hunter next to him, holding him made him feel safer. He was sure he’d have more bad dreams without being able to feel and hear the other man as he slept. He’d have to figure out a way to bring it up over dinner. 

The rooms they’d chosen were across the hall from the ‘bathroom’ and Sam stepped into the large tiled area. He went to one of the enclosed areas with the sieves and turned the handles to call the water, still amazed at its appearance. He held his hand under the flow of water and smiled. It would be really, really wonderful to be able to stand under the water and just let it run down your body, to get completely wet without worrying about contamination. He felt the water begin to grow warmer and shook his head thinking he was imagining it or inadvertently warming his hand with his will, but the longer he stood there, the warmer the water was getting. He turned the handle marked ‘C’ off and waited his hand still under the flow of water, to see what would happen. Sam was and wasn’t surprised when the water began to get warmer and then actually hot. He turned the ‘C’ handle back on and worked both handles until the water was a pleasant temperature. Dean was going to love this! He really hoped the water was safe.

Once he turned off the water he checked the plans he’d brought with him and noted that the enclosures were called showers, which made a shit ton of sense to him. It was exactly like an indoor rain shower. He next turned his attention to the toilets. Each was housed in an individual enclosure, like the showers, but these enclosures also had doors which you could lock. Earlier they had turned a handle that connected each basin to the water source and watched the basins fill. Sam now tried pushing the handle at the back of basins amid various pipes. He stepped back, startled, as the standing water was sucked out of the basin and the bowl refilled to a predetermined level. He watched the basin empty and fill several more times before it occurred to him that he might be looking at self-cleaning chamber pots. He had to find Dean, this was amazing.

The two men practically ran into one another in the library space. They spoke at the same time, “You’ve got to see this!”

“You first,” the mage said after they finished laughing.

“I have to show you. Follow me.” The hunter led the way back to the kitchen and pointed out the glowing spiral on the white box. “That thing is hot, I mean fire hot. Don’t touch it, but hold your hand over it for a minute.”

Sam did as requested and pulled his hand away and replaced it several times before turning back to Dean with wonder in his eyes. “How did you do that? How did you know that you could do that?”

“I didn’t know. I just played with the dials to see what would happen and at first nothing did so I walked away, but didn’t move the dials back and when I turned around it was glowing! Open the door, it got hot in there too.”

“This is incredible. I think that maybe they used this like fire, to cook with and maybe to heat the room.” Sam turned the dials to the ‘off’ position and nothing happened. “I just turned them to off, but it’s still glowing.” He turned to look at Dean.

The hunter shrugged, “It took a few minutes for it to glow so maybe it takes time to make the glowing stop. What did you say that word was?”

“That word o-f-f is off. I think in this case it means not working. The other words are h-i-g-h, high, m-e-d-i-u-m, medium and l-o-w, low, so most heat to least heat in this case. The numbers on the other dial must be settings for different levels of heat as well, or as near as I can tell. This is awesome, Dean, we’ll be able to use this to cook without an open fire!” Sam opened the door on the box a couple of more times and had noticed the glowing inside had stopped as well although the inside was still warm as was the spiral on the top of the box. “These must take time to heat up and cool off. We’ll have to remember these spirals could still be hot even when not glowing so we don’t get burned.”

“Yeah, okay, we’ll be careful. You said that the box was maybe to provide heat, but I don’t think so.” Dean walked across the room and pointed to an opening in the flooring that was screened. “I noticed air coming though this vent and it wasn’t cold air like you’d get from outside right now.”

“It makes sense that there’d be a way to circulate fresh air down here, we’ll have to put that on the list of things to find. Speaking of, I did find some plans for this place.” Sam moved to the table and spread out the drawings he’d taken. “There are more, I only took a couple of pages. Anyway, here’s where we are, the kitchen and here’s where we found the water room and bedrooms. The water room is labeled bathroom.”

“But there was no bath in there or didn’t I see it?”

“No, there was no tub, but those enclosures where the water was raining? Those are called showers, come with me, you’ve got to see this.” Sam led the way from the kitchen to the bathroom and turned both handles again starting the water, “wait a couple of minutes, then put your hand in the water.”

Dean looked at his friend sideways like he was being pranked, but the place he’d found was pretty unusual and he decided he’d trust Sam for the time being. He put his hand into the water when Sam nodded his head at his unspoken question, “It’s…..is it warm? Are you doing that?”

“No, I swear I’m not, that’s what I thought at first too. Turn the handle with the ‘C’.”

Dean did and his eyes widened as the water got even warmer, almost hot. “How is this happening? I don’t care if it’s not safe I’m standing under this at some point and getting wet. Can you imagine how good that must feel?”

The mage was smiling, pleased that Dean was as excited as he was by his discovery, “I know, right? Still we shouldn’t waste it,” He reached in and shut down the flow of water, “until we know the source. I’d hate to use up everything just watching it flow although it is tempting.”

“Did you figure out anything about these weird basins?” Dean was standing in the door of one of the cubicles, “Do you know what they do?”

“Push that handle down.”

The hunter stepped back as the water was suctioned from the basin. “Shit! What the fuck is that?” He watched as the basin filled up again to its previous level. “That’s pretty cool!”

“It’s called a toilet on the drawings and I think it’s a self-cleaning chamber pot,” Sam looked at Dean to see his reaction. “I mean the basins are the right height to sit on and the water gets suctioned out so presumably anything else in the basin would as well, right?” 

Dean looked skeptical, but shrugged, “I suppose so…..you can try it first, you figured it out.” The hunter was wearing one of his biggest grins.

“And you’ll just haul your ass up the stairs and out the main door when you need…..”

“Whatever! I’ll figure it out. Let’s go see about dinner, I’m starving.”

“Um, I thought you were going to cook if I figured out what the basins were? You backing out?” Sam cocked one eyebrow at the hunter and smirked.

“Fine, I’ll cook, come and keep me company. You can read those plans and see what else we’re sitting on here. I told you this was an amazing place.” Dean headed out the door and back toward the kitchen with Sam on his heels.

“You were right and thank you again for bringing me here,” Sam could see the tops of Dean’s ears get red and knew he was blushing. He loved that the tough hunter was also kind of shy.

Dinner came together pretty easily between the water appearing at the turn of a handle and not really needing to tend a fire, although regulating the heating elements on the cooker box was going to take some getting used to. 

Sam laid out the drawings on a couple of the library tables after dinner and walked Dean through each. He’d determined that the room labeled ‘control room’ would probably be able to tell them what the source of the library’s power was as well as where the water was coming from. In addition he found a large room with an outside entrance labeled ‘garage’, a word Sam wasn’t familiar with, but thought with the outside entrance they might be able to use it for housing their animals. They were going to need the horses and pony since they’d have to travel to the nearest town for supplies on a regular basis.

“While we look around tomorrow, keep your eyes open for things we can trade with in town. You probably know better than I do what will bring the best return.” Sam was stacking the plans, leaving the two they planned to use the next day on top of the pile. “The crowns we have aren’t going to last forever so we’ll need an alternative source of income if we’re going to stay here for a while.”

Dean leaned back in his chair so it was balanced on two legs and put his hands behind his head. “No problem. In the kitchen alone we could get a good amount in trade for the ceramics, you can’t find those in good condition anymore. I’m sure there will be other things as well. Sam?”

“Yeah?”

“Isn’t it kind of weird that everything in here works? I mean, look around, there’s no dust, cobwebs, dirt…..how does that happen? And no rust? That’s just fucking bizarre.” The hunter looked around the room as if looking for someone hiding.

“It is well maintained, but some of that can probably be explained by the dry air down here and a filtration system, if it exists. Do you think we’re not alone?” Sam stopped and looked over at the other man his expression changing from thoughtful to worried.

Dean dropped his chair back on the floor and put his arms on the table. “No, I don’t think anyone else is here now, we’ve made enough noise and no one’s come to check it out, but that doesn’t mean someone else hasn’t been here. We’ll need to watch for signs of someone else when we look around tomorrow and let’s take our weapons with us. I should have thought of that already.” The hunter shook his head, angry at himself for becoming so caught up in showing the library to the mage that he hadn’t been appropriately armed or on guard for others. “I’m sorry, Sam.”

“Nothing to be sorry for, I got caught up too, in fact look at this.” Sam moved across the room and touched a switch on the wall turning off the lights in the room. “Every room has one of these or at least every room I checked so far. We can control the light by area! That should help conserve energy if the power source is limited.” He switched the lights back on and sat beside the hunter at the table. “I’m guessing it’s solar like my arm, but we’ll know better once we find this control room.”

“Maybe we should shut everything down now so we don’t use it all up at once.” Dean got up and went to turn off the lights in the kitchen area as well as the hallway between the two areas. “I know there are probably lights in places we haven’t gone yet, but maybe we can worry about that tomorrow? I’m pretty tired.”

Sam considered the idea that the whole area was running power stored in solar cells. “Depends on how many cells they have to draw from. If you have enough of them theoretically a charged cell would just take over as one was discharged, then they’d all power up again when the sun was up. This place though is so unlike anything I’ve seen the system could be entirely different and maybe not solar powered at all. Hopefully we’ll get more answers tomorrow.”

They moved out of the library, shutting down the power as they went. Sam headed into the bathroom as Dean let himself into the room where he’d put his things when they’d arrived. He wanted to give Sam space, but was going to miss the giant overheated blanket that was generally draped over him at night and wondered how he could suggest they continue to share a space without making the damaged mage nervous. He went about putting the blankets and pillows they’d taken from the priory cabins on his bed. It smelled a little musty, but not any worse than some of the places he’d stayed over the years and it was bigger than the cots in the priory cabins. He was considering going next door to check on Sam when Sam knocked lightly on the door and let himself in.

“Hey, I just thought I’d let you know that those self-cleaning chamber pots work just fine, nothing to be afraid of,” Sam broke into a small smirk knowing Dean wouldn’t let him get away with calling him afraid.

Dean laughed and shook his head. “Not afraid, just urging caution.” The two men lapsed into silence, Sam looking at his feet and Dean at his hands. Neither man wanted to be alone and neither one knew how to ask for he wanted.

“So I guess I’ll just say good night.” Sam started to back out of the doorway, but stopped and drew a deep breath before speaking, “I…..um…..” The silence thickened just bit as Dean waited for the mage to continue, “I’m still having those dreams……the really bad ones. Can……will you…” Sam started to back up again.

“S’okay Sammy, you can stay in here with me. I won’t let the dreams hurt you.” Dean looked up in time to catch the smile break across the younger man’s face as he sighed in relief. “Go get your things, no reason to leave them next door.”

“Thank you.” 

The mage got his things he hadn’t put anything away yet and was back in record time. Dean had slipped out of his clothes and under the covers while he was gone, still very conscious of the other man’s trauma and doing his best to minimize the occurrences of the panic that still grabbed him at times. He turned on his side facing away from the main part of the room so Sam could undress privately.

“You don’t have turn away, I’m better,” Sam slipped out of his pants and under the covers after switching off the light.

“You’re a lot better Sammy, but I don’t want to make you nervous. It’s a lot darker in here than in a cabin.” Dean turned to face the mage whose features he could just barely make out in the nearly complete darkness. A small amount of light bled under the door from the hallway. The bigger man curled himself into Dean and allowed him to pull him into his arms.

“I know, but I don’t think you do….make me nervous. Other things still do, but you make me feel safe.” Sam was as close to the hunter as he could possibly be without completely laying on top of him, his long limbs folded until almost all of his body was touching Dean’s. “This feels….right.”

Dean smiled and hugged his mage a little tighter pressing soft kisses on his head, “I’ve got you, baby boy, no one’s going to hurt you again.”

Sam smiled as well and tried to snuggle even closer. “I know.”


	23. Settling

Over the next few days the boys were able to explore the rest of the underground structure and while they now knew where everything was located they still weren’t completely sure how everything worked. In the control room, as Sam had thought, they found the link up to the power system which was primarily solar powered but had a back-up generator that said ‘fusion reactor’ which Sam planned to look up since he wasn’t familiar with the terms. In the area labeled garage they found a number of two and four wheeled carriages that seemed to be self-propelled in some fashion. Dean volunteered to see if he could find information about them somewhere in either the library or the office off the garage area.

There was a large double door on one end of the garage that led outside. It had at one time been overgrown by weeds and vines but the drought that had lasted the last couple hundred years had killed the majority of the vegetation and left just a few tenacious vines holding the doors shut. Sam left Dean in the garage and let himself out the main entrance where he got the horses and using one of the maps from inside tried to orient himself in the direction of the garage from the outside. It took a while but he eventually found the garage doors and cleared the vines from the doors. Once cleared of the obstruction the doors worked surprisingly well, they were more weathered than anything else in the library but they were one of the only exterior features.

“I’m still surprised by how well everything works after sitting for so long,” Dean commented as he walked through the open doors. “Even these carriages are far less corroded than metal that’s been found elsewhere and they are primarily metal.”

Sam, shirtless and sweating from the exertion required to clear the door wiped his brow with one of the squares of silk. “I know what you mean. It’s puzzling, but there has to be an answer in there somewhere. We’ll just have to keep searching through the books and papers in the library and hope we stumble across something that makes sense.”

“Doesn’t it make you nervous that someone else might know about this place?” Dean was surprised by the nonchalance in the mage’s voice.

“Yes and no. I mean, we’re here now and I don’t want to leave so I figure we’ll just stay armed,” He nodded at his quarterstaff and pulled a knife from his boot, “and on guard. It’s not like we can’t handle ourselves in a fight.”

“Sure, but what if whoever it is uses one of those strange ranged weapons? I don’t think there’s a good defense for those since like a crossbow they could get a shot off from a distance.” Dean tried not to stare at his partner but was failing miserably. The mage just didn’t seem to get the fact that he was gorgeous and driving him to frustration. He’d never jerked off more than he’d done in the last few days. At least the showers and enclosed toilets were good for some privacy once you got used to the awful sucking sound the latter made.

“I don’t know, Dean, I’d think you’d have to get a pretty good distance away with one of those things and it doesn’t seem like there’s enough open space inside to make one of them effective. It would probably come down to a hand-to-hand fight and I think we’d both hold our own,” Sam wondered why the hunter was looking at him so strangely and ran his hand over his face again to make sure it wasn’t smeared with dirt. “Unless, of course, there’s more than one.” Sam’s voice trailed off with his last sentence.

‘Gods dammit,’ the hunter thought. He hadn’t wanted to make Sam think about the hunters who’d taken him. “Come on, Sammy. What are the odds that a group knows about this place and keeps it quiet? Once you tell a secret to one other person it’s no longer secret, right?”

“I guess so.” Sam’s brow was creased with worry lines and he was working in his head to push the thoughts of the hunters who’d kidnapped him back into the box he’d constructed to keep them from taking up too much of his head space. “The place does seem secure. Hey, let’s see if I can open the doors now that I’ve cleared them. You know, like the front door then we can trade places and see if you can get in.”

Dean laughed but figured showing the younger man that no one without the library’s permission was going to be able to get in, even if they managed to find the place was a good idea. “All right, let’s get these closed.”

Just like at the front door, the garage doors wouldn’t budge for Sam no matter what he tried. They stayed solidly closed even when he threw his weight against them. Dean, however, was able to stroll right in after he located the trigger for the locking mechanism.

“Feel a little better?” Dean walked over and put a hand on the mage’s shoulder as they tried to figure out how to house their animals in the garage area. He bit back a groan and smiled thinking that if just touching the other man was causing his dick to stand up and take notice that actually getting his mouth on him again was going to cause an instant orgasm.

“Is there something on my face? You keep looking at me strangely.” Sam truly didn’t realize the conflict he was causing in his friend. Sam loved touching him and being touched by him but hadn’t felt anything other than comfort at the hugs, touches and light kisses they’d been exchanging. Any more powerful feelings were locked in the same box with his thoughts of his kidnappers and his ordeal.

The hunter had to keep from laughing out loud at the innocent question. “No, nothing’s wrong with you. I just like how you look all flushed and sweaty. I can’t help it, I can wait forever for you, but I can’t stop admiring you.” He’d decided he’d be honest with Sam as they tried to work past the aftereffects of his torture he didn’t want the other man to forget that he was desired, loved even if he couldn’t show him physically.

Sam blushed and lowered his eyes, his instinct was to apologize but he knew from experience that the other man would brush it off, tell him he had nothing to apologize for but in Sam’s eyes he did. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to be with Dean, he dreamed of him for Jobs Gates’ sake! He liked being held, especially at night and had initiated plenty of hugs it was just that he froze anytime he thought of doing anything more than kissing him and he didn’t know how to stop that from happening. He believed that Dean was being honest when he told him it didn’t matter and at the same time worried that forever really did have an expiration date. Gods he hated the men who’d done this to him.

“S’okay, Sammy. I like looking at you.” Dean took Sam’s hand in his and rubbed his thumb over the palm. “Seeing you here, so excited about each new thing we find makes me happy. It’s what I wanted as soon as I realized how special you are.” The hunter knew he was making his mage nervous, but he thought he could handle the praise and that would be another step in his healing. Dean wasn’t going to let him feel that he didn’t matter, that he wasn’t important. “I mean, really Sam, no one was more surprised than I was when I was laying in your infirmary, being cared for by the things, sorry, people I’d been taught to be so afraid of my whole life and I realized that I was looking forward to your visits. Why? Well, look at you, but it’s more than that, you talked to me like I was an equal and Sam, no one who talks to you for any period of time can’t not notice what a decent man - what a good person you are. 

“Fuck the crap people throw around about techno-mages and cyborgs. You are one of the smartest and nicest people I know. Shit, you’re teaching me to read, no one’s ever bothered before. So when you told me how they planned to punish you, I knew I HAD to get your book for you and then when I saw it, I knew I had to bring you here. Sam, I’d have brought you here even if……if you weren’t interested in me but I was glad you were and still are. I don’t think there’s anything I wouldn’t do for you, that’s just how much you’ve changed the way I think about things.” Dean dropped Sam’s hand and grabbed his horse’s bridle and led him into the garage.

Sam watched Dean walk away after the flood of words. He didn’t think Dean had ever used so many at one time before and was profoundly moved by the emotion in his voice as he spoke. The fact that Sam didn’t know what he’d do without him scratched at the edges of his mind as he followed with the other two animals. He vowed to himself he’d make more effort at overcoming the paralyzing fear that the thought of sex brought with it.

They’d cut up the dead and dying vegetation to make the garage floor a little more animal friendly and were finally able to unsaddle the horses since they didn’t need to keep them concealed once inside. Sam thought they could turn them out for a couple of hours a day and volunteered to keep watch over them since he’d need to charge his arm. He figured he could bring a couple of books outside with him and read while he guarded the horses and the door.

It was a couple of days later while on guard/recharge duty and thinking about having to leave the library to go for supplies, that Sam realized that they could be using the concealment devices they had on both of the entrances; he’d taken a couple of extras from the priory where they’d imprisoned Dean when they broke out. He activated the devices on the horses’ bridles and shut the doors as he hurried to find Dean and share the news.

The hunter stood under the shower allowing the warm water – warm! water! – to wash away not just the dirt and sweat on his skin but to also soothe away the sexual tension that living with his ideal partner caused. ‘Yeah,’ he thought, ‘who ever thought of showers is a god I can worship.’ They were out of soap - it was on the list to trade for when they headed to town at the end of the week but a silk square and warm water were still effective for getting clean. He washed up quickly and moved on to his favorite part of shower time. He ran his hands down his chest pinching his nipples until they stood at attention and begged to be kissed and licked. His eyes closed, his mind replaced his own hands with Sam’s and he groaned out loud as he moved them lower. His cock was already hard, hell just thinking of a shower got him hard these days. He ran one of his hands over the sensitive tip and squeezed out a bit of pre-come as he groaned again. He braced his back against one of the walls of the enclosure and pretended it was Sam’s chest behind him, supporting him as his hands worked his cock and balls and he licked and bit at his neck.

Sam headed back to their living space when he didn’t find Dean in either the kitchen or the library. As he rounded the corner he could hear the shower running in the bathroom. They’d both decided that the showers outranked even the self-cleaning chamber pot toilets as their favorite feature of their new home. There was something decadent and almost obscene about standing under that much water that even made Sam’s dick try to get hard as the spray from the shower cascaded over it. He opened the door and stepped into the room his mouth open to call out Dean’s name, but his voice deserted him as he was confronted by the sight of his hunter leaning against the wall, eyes closed, pleasuring himself. He knew he should turn and leave or at the very least announce himself but he was held mesmerized by the feral beauty of the other man. He didn’t start to panic and felt no shame - in fact he felt his dick start to stir for the first time since his ordeal. Afraid to chase his arousal away, Sam stood rooted in place as he stared at Dean hoping he was the one he was thinking of as his hand slid up and down his thick, wet cock. Without even realizing what he was doing, the mage found his own hand slipping into his pants and rubbing at his growing erection causing him to choke back a cry of pleasure as he took himself in hand.

Dean heard his mage’s strangled cry and opened his eyes slightly without stopping what he was doing. He nearly came when he realized where Sam’s hand was and what he was doing. The hunter was then faced with a choice and he had to make it quickly. Continue without letting Sam know he knew he was there or invite him to join him in the shower. As much as he craved the other man’s touch he decided to keep on without letting on that he knew he had an observer, hoping that by not calling attention to the fact that he was aroused the younger man would be able to take another step toward healing. This of course didn’t mean he couldn’t put on a bit of a show and he smiled as he thrust into his own hand still pretending it was Sam’s hand working him to climax and moaned Sam’s name out loud.

‘Gods,’ Sam thought, ‘that was my name!’ He almost fell to his knees as the rest of his blood rushed to his already erect cock and he bit back a moan of his own. He knew he should leave, but he couldn’t, he couldn’t even close his eyes which were locked on the hunter’s cock as he worked it. His other hand loosened the fly on his pants to give himself more room and he spit into his hand and began stroking himself in time with Dean gathering the pre-come he was forcing out on the upstroke to help lube the down strokes.

The hunter knew he’d have to hold back and let Sam come first so he could leave the room if he wanted to and so grabbed himself and held back the orgasm that had been building at the base of his spine. He risked another look over at the mage and was pleased to see his eyes still fastened on him and his cock out and erect. He squeezed his eyes shut again and held onto himself even harder to keep from coming at the sight.

Sam kept his eyes focused on the other man’s hands and dick as he began to thrust into his own hand. He could feel his orgasm building and along with it a twinge of the shame he’d felt when he came during his rape but he was able to bat that thought away as he remained focused on the straining muscles and rigid cock in front of him. He remembered having his hand wrapped around it and the sounds of pleasure he’d been able to coax from the hunter in the past. As if listening to his thoughts the hunter let out another moan of pleasure as he began to fuck himself into his hand again. Sam was done - he swallowed his own moan as he came, his seed spilling onto the tiled floor as well as all over his hand. He was breathless as he worked the last shocks through his system with just enough presence of mind to grab one of the silk squares by the sink to wipe the floor, sort of, before slipping out the door before he could be seen.

When he heard the door close behind the mage, Dean let himself go smiling as he came all over the tile in front of him. Performing for Sam had been one of the most erotic experiences he’d ever had and he wondered if once his mage was ready to move past his trauma if he’d let him perform for him again. Thinking of Sam’s response to his own pleasure was almost enough to get him hard again but he pushed the thought aside more than a little conscious of all the water he’d used on his shower. The availability of water in their new home was taking some getting used to. Even a good well could go dry the hunter reminded himself as he finished rinsing the come from his body and turned the water off. He couldn’t help but wonder how Sam was feeling as he dried off and got dressed.

After stopping long enough to do up his fly, Sam ran through the structure and headed back out the garage entrance to his assigned post with the animals. He couldn’t get the sight of the wanton pleasure on Dean’s face out of his mind and he allowed himself to dwell on the pleasure he’d felt at watching the other man jerk himself off. The mage was surprised that he’d gotten hard and even more surprised that he’d been able to come. He’d really been afraid that he’d never be able to again despite Dean’s assurances to the contrary. He knew he should tell the hunter he’d been in the bathroom, that he’d seen him. It would be something that would come back and bother him if he didn’t, but he wasn’t really sure how to bring the subject up.

As Dean made his way to the garage he decided that he’d let Sam know he knew he’d been there and but maybe not reference the fact that he also knew he’d enjoyed the show and see how the other man reacted. He spotted Sam sitting in the sun a book open on his knees and he walked over and sat down next to him. “So what did you want earlier?” Dean let the question just hang in the silence for a brief bit of time before offering the other man an out, “I thought I heard you while I was in the shower.”

“Yeah….um…..yeah, about that I was looking for you and I…..um found you.” Sam hadn’t looked over at his friend but didn’t jerk away when Dean rested his arm across his back.

“Like anything you saw?” Dean reached over with his other hand and turned Sam’s face to his so he could see that he was fine with it. “I really don’t mind. I kinda liked it.”

“I…..yeah, I liked a lot of things.” Sam searched the other man’s eyes for any sign that he was joking or that he was angry and only saw the caring concern that he’d shown since he’d found Sam after.

“Good. Next time you’re welcome to join me, if you want.” Dean held Sam’s gaze long enough to allow the other man to bolt away if he was uncomfortable and when he didn’t the hunter pulled him closer and brushed his mouth with a gentle kiss, pleased when Sam kissed him back. He moved the hand on his face to the back of his head and tangled his fingers in the slightly sweaty hair at the back of his neck as he held him in place. His hand softly guiding rather than insisting, he kissed a line of firmer kisses across the other man’s lips, biting them gently then kissing again before pulling back. “You okay?”

Rather than speak Sam caught Dean’s lower lip in his mouth and sucked at it before capturing the other man’s mouth in an insistent and needy kiss. Licking at the hunter’s mouth until he opened his lips and let him slip his tongue inside where he licked at his teeth and then his tongue. Dean tried to break the kiss only to have the younger man hold him in place as he continued to lick and swirl his tongue to every area of the other’s mouth, only breaking the kiss when he was ready. “I think I am,” was his breathless reply.


	24. Overtures

Several days passed and Brother Sam felt lighter than he had in weeks and was significantly less guarded. That said both men knew in their hearts that Sam’s fear and anxiety weren’t going to disappear overnight even though he’d made a significant step forward so they concentrated on learning more about their new home and planning their next trip to town. 

The concealers worked well on the visible outer doors giving them the peace of mind necessary to travel together so that neither man, Sam in particular, would be left alone. Sam thought he’d be fine in the library but Dean wasn’t going to take a chance with the still healing mage and wanted the company as well. They’d found a number of things in the various rooms that they thought they could successfully trade for supplies, including some unbroken glass vessels that Sam thought would bring them the most in trade.

Their plan was to leave early the next morning and they were working together in the garage packing their trade goods and travel rations on the pack saddle and readying their saddle bags. Dean’s blades had been cleaned and honed and the quarterstaff was ready to go as always.

“You really think we can make Marshalltown in two days?” Dean’s skill at map reading had become better but he still had difficulty estimating distances based on a piece of paper.

“I’m pretty sure we can unless there are obstacles that have come up since the map was drawn. I think we should bring enough food and water for three days and if we make it in two we do. Unfortunately, there were no priory properties marked on the maps here. I’m not sure I could find one without a general idea of its location.” Sam was working on the pack saddle cushioning the glass vessels with the remaining silk as well as from the leftover leather from the pants he’d made for himself.

“I think that it’s better if we don’t stay in them anyway. We’d never be sure we wouldn’t get company and even though we’re pretty far from the water priory I’m still concerned one of your brother mages will have our descriptions,” Dean stopped grooming his horse and walked over to where the mage was working, “I know you’ve been working hard on your ‘don’t look here’ ability but I don’t want anything happening to either of us.” He caught the mage by his left wrist and turned him so that they were face to face. “I couldn’t bear the thought of anything happening to you or being parted from you again.”

Sam drew the smaller man into his arms and held him tightly, pleased that he didn’t feel even a shadow of anxiety as Dean hugged back and even felt the pleasant fluttering in his stomach that could be the beginnings of arousal. “I agree. I don’t really like staying in them anyway, and now we’ve gotten used to this place the cabins will be downright primitive. I’m going to miss the water here it’s hard to remember that most places don’t have nearly the access we have.”

“At least we’ve found those containers that we can use for water in addition to our water skins,” Dean nodded toward a round metal container with a screw on lid. “We can carry a lot more water this way and not get as thirsty and dry.” The hunter was reluctant to let go, but loosened his grip and dropped the other man’s hand. He wasn’t going to crowd the younger man or push for more affection than he felt comfortable initiating on his own.

The mage allowed him to step away, but held on to his shoulders and smiled, “it’ll be fun seeing a new town and it’ll be fun being on the road with you again. Who knows, maybe we’ll run into some demons and we can pick up a bounty for you as well.”

“Nope, we’ll kill ‘em if we find ‘em, but then you’re sending the mother-fuckers back to hell. If you’re right and that keeps them from returning you’re doing more to clear out the vermin than any hunter dead or alive ever has.” Dean smiled at the blush he’d put on his mage’s cheeks and had to wonder just how much praise an orphan at a priory ever received growing up. His father had been a bastard, but he’d at least had his uncle Bobby to tell him when he’d done something particularly well.

“I don’t know that for sure and I don’t think there’s a way to find out, it’s just a feeling I have and I could be wrong.” Sam shook his head as he finished tying down the packages on the pack saddle, “Are the horses ready?”

“Yeah, we’ve just got to saddle them tomorrow and we’re ready to go. Hey how are we going to know when it’s morning? When we’re here it doesn’t matter but if we want an early start tomorrow, how will we know?” Dean led the way back down into the library closing the door behind Sam.

“I guess we won’t know and we’ll leave whenever we get up. There has to be a way to count the passing of the hours down here but I haven’t found it yet. You would think that the people that built this place would have thought of that and had a system in place.” They headed to the kitchen area to try to put a meal together with the few things they still had.

“Maybe they did and we haven’t figured it out yet, or maybe we’ve seen it and didn’t know what it was?” Dean was searching the shelves hoping to find some raisins.

Sam laughed at the look of frustration on Dean’s face at not finding any more dried fruit, “Sorry, Dean, it’s oatmeal tonight. That’s about all we have left that we’re not taking with us,” Sam turned the water on to fill the kettle still amazed at the fact that they got water so easily.

“It’s okay, we probably should have gone a week ago, but it’s just so easy to stay here and not worry about what’s outside,” Dean got their bowls and spoons and put them on the table. There was still a tiny bit of honey left from the supplies Sam had initially taken from his priory so they’d be able to add a little sweetness to the porridge and it wouldn’t be so bland.

Once the oatmeal was ready Sam brought the kettle to the table and filled their bowls, when he turned to put the kettle back on the cooker Dean pushed the honey jar to his side of the table and made sure he was stirring his bowl when the mage returned. Sam carefully put half the remaining honey on his portion and slid the jar across the table.

“I already put honey on mine, the rest is yours.” Dean was rewarded by a dimple popping smile as the mage put the rest of the honey on his cereal.

“I didn’t think we had that much left.”

“You know how the jar can fool the eye, there was more than I thought too,” Dean had to keep his smile to himself, he loved doing things for Sam, but if he caught him at it he’d insist on an even split or he’d take less or do more. The hunter wasn’t sure if it was something learned from being priory raised or if it was just the way he was but the gentle mage was generous almost to a fault.

Sam stirred his porridge to cool it off a bit, “I found a book that I think you could read. There will be some words you don’t know, but that’s how all books are. I mean, if you want to keep reading.”

“Thanks, Sam. I am getting a little tired of the same one and yes, I want to keep reading. All these books and all these, what did you call them?”

“Artifacts.”

“Right, artifacts, would you write that for me so I know what it looks like? I want to know what they are too and if we both read, we can find out faster. Especially about those carriages, have you ever seen anything like that before?”

“Yes, I’ll write the word for you or even better, I’ll show you how to write it. I’ve never seen a carriage that looked so whole before. Occasionally when I’d get pretty far from a priory,” Sam noticed Dean’s eyebrows raise in question at his last statement. “I get curious. Anyway, I’ve seen skeletons of them twice, just the metal frame looking like bones sticking out of the earth that’s gotten piled up around them. They are really creepy looking when you’re all alone and you find one. It was like I could almost sense…..” Sam shook his head and concentrated on his bowl. “No, it’s silly.”

“No, go on, I swear I won’t laugh.” Dean was scraping at the bits of cereal left in his bowl.

“There’s more,” Sam started to rise.

“No, I’ve got it, go on.”

Sam waited for Dean to return to the table. “I’m sorry, I used the honey.”

“Don’t be, I gave it to you, go on,” Dean stirred his bowl just to cool it off a bit. The cooker and the kettle kept things really warm.

“All right, it was like I could sense its ghost, its spirit hanging over the bones. As if it had once been alive. I knew it was a machine, but it seemed like it was more and I can’t explain the feeling any better than that.”

They ate in silence for a few minutes, each thinking about what Sam had said and thinking about the carriages that they’d found in the garage. Dean spoke first, “You know, I can almost imagine that and not just because I’m hot for you either.” He looked up and grinned at the mage, “Even the ones in the garage seem like they each have a different personality. Wouldn’t you love to ride in one of them?”

“I don’t know,” Sam was smiling, “We don’t even know how they worked. Well, okay, maybe if I knew what made them run, but they seem, not evil, but slightly menacing to me and I’m not sure why.”

“Not to me! I’d love to figure one out. Hey, that would make me a techno-mage, right? If I could figure out how to make one run again we’d be brothers! That is what a mage does, right?” It didn’t even occur to Dean as he spoke that not that many months ago the last thing he’d have wanted to be was a techno-mage. The only reason he was still frightened by the priory system was that they’d threatened to turn him over to his guild and name him traitor. Otherwise he’d gotten to like the ones he’d met. Well, there was Jolene.

Sam was laughing, “Yes, that’s exactly what we do, but you have to read so let’s keep up with your lessons and maybe you will be taking me for a ride in one of those machines one day. Do other hunters read? How common is it?”

“Promise you’ll let me take you for a ride if I figure it out?” Sam was still laughing but nodded his assent. “Most hunters can read a little bit, more than I can, but not like you or the mages in general. They learn just what they need to know to get along. In fact, that’s the case for just about everyone. There really are no books or anyone to teach them, and even if there were most people are working sun up to sun down just to scratch a living from the earth and wouldn’t have the extra time. When I had to…….when I found the note, I took it to a priest and asked him to read it to me. There were probably others in town that could have made it out, but not many. Why?”

“Do you think people would want to learn how? Or have their children taught to read?”

“I honestly don’t know. I’ve never thought about it. What are you thinking?” Dean picked up both bowls and took them to the sink to wash them out.

“You’ve mentioned a number of times that the techno-mages are feared because of our seclusion and our education; I did hear those songs about us and the comments. What if an order of mages was formed that went to towns in order to teach reading and math? Do you think people would accept that?” Sam was picking at a splinter in the table, his mind rushing way ahead with ideas of how he could help others move past just bare survival and help them learn something that could help them craft their futures.

Dean returned to the table with two mugs of weak tea and set them down before dashing out of the room. “I’ll be right back,” he called over his shoulder.

The mage sat at the table with his hands cradling the hot mug thinking about the logistics around trying to teach others to read without general access to books, it was a fatal flaw. Without access to books, what would be the incentive to learn and how would people be able to keep their skill once they’d learned it. There was obviously a lot that needed to be worked out provided anyone wanted to learn at all.

Once the hunter returned to the kitchen he took the seat next to Sam rather than across from him and pulled his mug closer, his smile just about splitting his face.

“What are you smiling about?” Sam looked at his hunter sideways through his lashes. “You look like the cat that ate the canary.”

“Okay, why do people say that? That’s awful!” Dean was still smiling despite his outrage at the saying that he thought wasn’t very accurate. “I have a surprise for you.”

“What?”

“If I told you, it wouldn’t really be a surprise, would it? Close your eyes,” the hunter watched Sam struggle against the urge to continue to push for an explanation and was pleased when he compiled and shut his eyes.

Dean moved closer and put one hand behind Sam’s head turning it slightly, “Relax baby boy, not gonna hurt you,” he whispered as he slipped the last square of chocolate into his mouth and moved in to capture the other man’s mouth. His tongue licked over Sam’s mouth, a hint of chocolate already evident. When Sam’s mouth opened in surprise Dean slipped the chocolate into Sam’s mouth and continued to kiss him alternating soft, whisper-like kisses with soul-searing deeply passionate ones so that they were sharing the taste of the chocolate between them.

Moaning into Dean’s mouth at both the taste and the sensation of the kiss, Sam wrapped his arms around the other man and drew him closer, moving one hand to his jaw to adjust the angle of the kiss so he could reach more of the other man’s mouth licking and sucking at his tongue and lips as he tried to get every last trace of chocolate, the taste, the feel and the smell of the man in his arms working in concert to bring him past the point of fear, his dick lengthening and hardening with each stroke of his tongue.

Not content to just be kissed the hunter answered by slipping his tongue into his love’s mouth so that their tongues slipped and slid against and around each other. Not battling for dominance but in complement, like a couple of dancers, working intricate patterns and coaxing every ounce of sensation from and for each other. He had been hard from the minute he remembered the chocolate and thought of what to do with it, but the kiss and the sounds Sam was making were making him even harder and he was sure he was going to come just from the kiss. Breaking the kiss briefly Dean moved his mouth to the younger man’s ear and in between nips and licks whispered, “I told you I wouldn’t hurt you, baby. Will you trust me a little longer? As soon as it’s too much, just say the word and I’ll stop, but will you let me make you feel good?”

Sam was almost beyond speech but was able to stammer out a ‘yes’ as Dean made his way down the neck that was bared so nicely for him, Sam’s head thrown back in pleasure. Using open mouth kisses alternating between nips and soothing licks Dean worked his way down to the perfect collar bones and dipped his tongue into each of the hollows, spending a long time at each one drawing more and more desperate sounds from his mage. Once he was satisfied that he’d given all the pleasure he could he continued his path down the well-muscled chest to the already hard nipples. Here he stopped to bite and gently pull at each bud followed by broad strokes with his tongue, each nipple received an equal amount of attention and Sam was practically keening his pleasure, his words having deserted him. Dean looked up and nearly came at the sight of his mage, head still thrown back, hair moving in waves as he was almost laid out in his chair and very nearly senseless, “Stop?” he asked, genuinely worried about going too far and triggering a paralyzing flashback.

“No, please don’t….I mean don’t stop,” the mage managed to verbalize what he wanted as he was panting, his skin exquisitely sensitive and wanting more.

The hunter smiled and placed another kiss on Sam’s mouth before going back to working down his body. He stopped again when he reached the other man’s belly button and spent minutes using his tongue to dip in and out while placing nips and kisses all around it. The mage was squirming and arching his back wanting more and more of Dean’s mouth on him. While working on the perfect belly button Dean had to reach down and undo his fly, he was hard and had been leaking pre-come freely. The relief of the open fly was brief and he was soon holding himself back from thrusting against Sam’s legs. Instead he concentrated on moving even lower, licking along the top of the leather pants and slipping just underneath. He stopped again and could have sworn he heard Sam curse when he stopped. “Still trust me, Sammy? You still okay?”

Sam just groaned and untied his fly letting his erect cock spring free. He unconsciously thrust himself toward Dean who had moved to his knees. “I’m……I….don’t stop……gods please.”

“I’ve got you, baby boy.” Dean worked the leather pants past Sam’s hips and encouraged him to lift himself up a bit as he moved them out of his way. Sam’s cock was beautiful, long, thick, not as thick as his, but proportional and slightly curved towards his belly. The hunter leaned forward and caught the drop of pre-come glistening at his slit on the tip on his tongue. Sam was as sweet as he remembered and Dean moaned out loud as Sam thrust himself toward him again. Taking the hint, the hunter wrapped one hand around the base of the cock he’d been wanting and licked a broad stroke up the underside pressing on the vein that pulsed there. His mage was almost undone and Dean didn’t think he’d last a whole lot longer so he took as much of his length in to his mouth as he could and sucked as he drew it out.

“Gods Dean! That’s, fuck that’s……” Sam’s words trailed off into a series of grunts and moans with an occasional word thrown in for effect.

The hunter didn’t stop. He took the mage’s cock further into his mouth with each stroke, working it steadily to the back of his throat. He kept his one hand on the base, holding back his orgasm and helping to control his thrusts and moved his other to his own aching cock thrusting into his own hand while continuing to suck and swirl his tongue around Sam’s cock in his mouth. When he was close to his own orgasm he loosened his hold on Sam and drew him into his throat humming as he did so. The second time he did this the mage came with a shout, the force of his spend almost gagging him, but he held on and nursed at the still very hard cock until he’d worked every bit of come from it. He came as he pulled off Sam’s cock and looked up at the fucked out, sucked out?, man draped over the chair before him. His own orgasm was nearly as hard and long as Sam’s and was working himself through the last of his aftershocks as Sam gently cupped his face and turned it up so that their eyes met.

Afraid to speak Sam tried to communicate everything he was feeling through his eyes. His limbs felt like jelly and he was sure he’d lost all capability of speech. He pulled the other man closer and leaned down to capture the oh so perfect mouth with his own again. His kiss was deep, but gentle, loving and soothing rather than urgent and demanding.

Dean broke the kiss and stood, tucking himself back into his pants, he looked around the room for something to wipe his mess from the floor. He kissed the top of Sam’s head as he went to the sink and got the dish cloth. Once he wiped the floor he pulled Sam up and helped him adjust his pants. He was afraid to ask if everything was okay, he thought it was and really didn’t want to hear otherwise.

“Come on, Dean, let’s go to bed. It will be a couple of long days in the saddle,” Sam put a hand on the small of the hunter’s back as he guided him from the kitchen. They turned out the lights as they moved back to their room. Dean was prepared to leave the room so Sam could get under the covers but before he did, Sam stopped him. “Unless you have leave, stay. It really doesn’t bother me anymore.” The mage slipped out of his pants and was in their bed before Dean could form a reply.

Smiling, the hunter turned the lights off, stripped and slipped into bed and into the arms of the man he hoped he was helping, the man he loved more than anything. Sam curled into him, throwing one leg over his, laying his head on his chest and lacing his fingers with one of his hands and drawing it up and curled against both of their chests.

“Dean?”

“Sammy?” Dean could feel Sam’s tears running down his chest, but he didn’t think he was distressed, just overcome.

“I…….I……I’m……”

“I know, Sammy, you good?” He felt the younger man nodding his head against his chest, “Good.”

They lay in silence, Sam’s tears drying as Dean rubbed circles on his back, not making a sound, just reassuring him with his presence. Their breathing steadied and started to synch up as each man relaxed into the embrace of the other. Sam knew Dean was asleep when he started softly snoring, a sound Sam actually liked and he snuggled himself even closer to the other man his own eyes feeling heavy with sleep. As he was drifting off he whispered softly, “I love you.”


	25. Marshalltown

The ride to Marshalltown was uneventful and they were able to find a grove of overgrown scrub trees and shrubs not too far out where they felt they could conceal their weapons. It was afternoon by the time they were ready to head into town and they decided that since this would be their principle shopping area that they’d stay the night with the intent of becoming better known as well as to pick up any local gossip.

“So are we still Joe and Steven?” Sam asked as they mounted up to head out.

Dean knew he was getting shit over the false names but played along. “I don’t know Sammy, maybe we’d be better off with Angus and Malcolm, what do you think?”

“Ha, ha. No one’s named Angus but cows and you just made up Malcolm.” Sam was laughing.

“Made you laugh! I swear those are names somewhere, we’ve just never heard them before.” Dean liked yanking the younger man’s chain, especially when Sam wasn’t quite sure whether he was being serious or not.

“You are such an ass.” Sam was smiling.

“You mean I have such a fine ass? Thank you I think I do too. I know you look at it often enough.”

The mage blushed bright red. He did look at Dean’s ass as often as he could and thought he’d done a better job of being casual about it. “Whatever.”

Dean was satisfied that he’d pulled the best bitch face he could out of Sam, it was sometimes just too easy, he decided to move on. “I think we can use our real names, you can use Winchester if you want since you can’t identify with your priory name anymore if you want to use the brother story.”

“Yeah, thanks, but do we have to be brothers? If we’re here for a long time, even on and off…..I’d…..it would be hard to show how close we are…..I mean…..right?”

“Whatever you want Sammy, we don’t have to mention what our relationship is to anyone, they can draw whatever conclusions they want. I’m proud to be your boyfriend and you’re right, as possessive as I am the brothers thing wouldn’t hold water too long.” Dean moved his horse closer to Sam’s and squeezed his hand. “I want everyone to know you’re mine.”

Sam blushed again, but was pleased. He might not be able to show much affection right now, but he was working on it and hoped that he’d once again be able to be freely affectionate with the man he considered his one and only, his love. He figured eventually two bachelor brothers living in seclusion together would generate its own kind of gossip so starting off as a couple would cause less speculation in the long run.

They stabled their animals, arranged for a room for the night at the inn attached to the stable and brought their things inside. The room came with breakfast the next morning but there was dinner service at the inn as well as entertainment in the main room that evening which helped simplify things. They separated the items they’d brought for trade from the rest of their things and set out to explore the main shopping district.

Marshalltown was about the same size as Lincoln and had a busy main street with a number of shops selling all manner of goods. As before they went first to the apothecary, Sam thought that the glass vessels they’d brought with them would be coveted by the chemist there and he was right. They were able to get a lot for the vessels with the chemist asking them to think of him first if they found any more like them. They opened an account at the apothecary and left most of the value of their trade on the account taking a few silvers and a handful of coppers as well as the goods they needed which would be delivered to the inn for them from the total.

The rest of the items they’d brought with them they were able to trade at the general store and they opened an account there as well with a healthy balance even after they’d ordered the items they needed for the next month. Again they took a few slivers and coppers with them to pay for their other purchases. A crown at the tailor purchased them each a new shirt, pants, some underwear and a couple pairs of gloves for Sam. The tailor took their measurements and Sam had to breathe deep and look at Dean in order to get through the ordeal without breaking down, but he did it. Their new garments would be ready the next day and the tailor would deliver them to the stable. He’d asked about the gloves and Sam told him he’d been burned as a child and liked to keep the scars covered when he was in town. 

It was starting to get dark as they headed back to the inn and both men were hungry. Dean took one of Sam’s hands and laced his fingers through his, pleased that the mage didn’t seem bothered by the affection. “I’m sorry they don’t have a sweet shop here, we may have to plan a few longer trips back to Lincoln just to keep you in sweets.”

Sam had been disappointed by the fact that there were no candies to be had but didn’t think he’d shown it. “It’ll be okay. We got a lot of dried fruit and fresh apples that will be good for a while. Still, maybe someday we can go back. The priories and the guild won’t look for us forever, right?”

“Right, we’ll just have to lay low for a few more months and I’m sure that there will be other news more important that we ever were. I’m going to get my haircut tomorrow do you want them to neaten yours up too? Do you think you’d be okay with it? I like your hair longer, but you may want to be able to see.”

“Maybe, let’s see how I feel tomorrow. I broke out in a sweat at the tailor and thought I was going to lose it for minute.” Sam wouldn’t have minded a haircut but he really was a little worried about someone else touching him. He didn’t want to freak out in the town they’d be depending on for their supplies in the future.

“I hate it when they measure my inseam too, that kind of freak out is pretty natural. No guy really likes the tailor messing around up there, unless the tailor looks like you, then you know, maybe.” Dean laughed at the look on Sam’s face. “He has your measurements now and unless you keep growing or shrink he won’t have to measure you again. That’s the bonus on staying in one place for a while.” They’d reached the inn and Dean held the door for his date?, ‘yeah’ he thought ‘this is a date, I’m taking my baby out on the town.’ The thought made him happy and he hoped Sam would be able to relax and enjoy the night out.

The settled into a table with Dean facing the door and Sam to his left, angled toward the small stage where the talent for the night would perform. The proprietress came by to get their order. They had roast chicken that night and Dean ordered one for them each when the girl said they were on the small side, and ales to wash everything down.

“I’m glad you’re here,” Sam whispered, “I feel like a dunce, I wouldn’t have even known what to ask. The more I’m out with you the more I think the priory system IS a disadvantage to its members. Of course, not everyone is raised in one like I was. Some brothers and sisters join later in life when they’re ready for a quieter, more contemplative life.”

Dean paid for their meals when they were delivered and asked to leave the bar tab open, the proprietress seeing the boys had money offered no objection and even brought them a pitcher of ale. Their chicken was served with roasted potatoes and turnips and was the largest meal either of them had eaten since Mt. Laurel. Sam got about three quarters of the way through his before he was too full to continue, Dean had finished and Sam pushed his plate toward him. “Here, I’m finished.”

“You sure? You could wait a bit and see if you can finish it a little later.” The hunter hoped it wasn’t anxiety that had affected Sam’s appetite. “There’s no time limit on finishing.”

“No, Dean, you go ahead. I’m full, really,” Sam was more used to the Spartan meals they had on the road. The priories were frugal in all aspects and the meals there simple affairs. Everything had been really good, but he didn’t want to give himself a stomach ache, “and I’m fine.” 

The hunter hesitated briefly and then switched plates. Sam refilled their mugs and sat back to watch Dean eat. He truly liked feeding the other man. It was one way he felt he could repay everything the hunter had done for him since, well since, and the hunter relished every bite from first to last like it was the first time he’d eaten in weeks.

Dean blushed slightly under the intense gaze of his mage. He knew he was being a glutton, but growing up having enough food was a luxury and he’d never quite been able to abandon the need to eat past his capacity when food was available, afraid it might be a while before the next meal. He had just finished when the entertainer took the stage. He wore the multicolored cloak of a bard, someone who’d apprenticed under another bard and was part of the bardic guild, an organization similar to the federation hunter’s guild of which Dean was a member. The bard’s guild had guild houses in the larger towns where their members could stay while traveling, learn new songs or new instruments and even trade instruments when needed. The hunter explained this to Sam as the musician unwrapped and began to tune his guitar.

“So he’d be considered more talented than the minstrel we saw in Mt. Laurel?” Sam watched the man on the stage carefully interested in how he knew the right pitch for each string.

“Yes, in theory.” Dean moved a little closer so that their legs were touching under the table, “Some very talented minstrels like to remain outside the guild system because they’d rather not have to pay dues or limit their song choices to those that are officially approved by their guild masters.”

Sam thought about this while he continued to watch the bard tune the guitar. “Were the songs you requested approved songs?”

“Yeah, they are. They are actually pretty popular and you may hear them again tonight. The songs that aren’t approved usually have to do with life before the demons and any songs that are critical of the way things are run in the towns and cities.”

“That doesn’t seem right. People should be able to think and even say whatever they want.”

“Were you allowed to do that where you were raised?” Dean kept his voice down and was deliberately vague with his question.

The mage was quiet for a while before he answered. “Before I met you I might have answered differently, but no, we weren’t encouraged to think for ourselves outside of any research we were involved with. I still think it’s wrong.”

“It is, but that’s the way it’s been for a long time. I have no idea how things were before, but maybe that’s something you’ll find back home.” Dean laid his hand on Sam’s thigh and seeing no fear in the other man’s eyes, let it rest there.

The bard on the stage strummed a couple of chords to test the tuning of his instrument and to grab the crowd’s attention. “Welcome all to the Baying Hound. I am Gabe, third degree bard, and I hope you enjoy what you hear tonight. As always, your tips are welcome and encouraged. I’ll open the floor for requests a little later but I want to start with a couple of new songs that you’ve probably not heard yet.” The small crowd erupted with cheers, applause and table slapping, new songs were an occasion for celebration.

The bard was talented and the music was good. One of his new songs was an epic tale of star crossed lovers and the power of love to overcome even the worst obstacles. There were very few dry eyes in the house by the time he hit the last chord. He immediately launched into an upbeat tune that everyone seemed to know and he encouraged audience participation at the chorus.

“You’re not singing, don’t you know this one?” Sam whispered.

“I know it, I just don’t sing, ever.”

“Yes you do, I’ve heard you in the shower.”

“It’s different, that’s not really singing, it’s more like chanting.” Dean was looking anywhere but at Sam.

“It’s singing and you’re not bad, I like your singing.” Sam knew he was getting under the hunter’s skin and figured he deserved it after the teasing he’d done earlier.

“Shhhhh, I’m trying to listen.”

Sam laughed. He was surprised, he was far less nervous being in town than he was the last time. He hoped he’d keep improving, he was still having nightmares but he usually woke up pretty quickly and knew where he was and that he was safe. Dean was incredibly patient with him and seemed to sense when things were getting too intense. He honestly felt completely safe with him, but still wasn’t completely ready to reciprocate when things got physical.

After he finished his last song of the set, Gabe placed his instrument safely out of the way and made his way to the boy’s table ignoring the others offering to buy him a drink. “Would you boys be able to spare a drink for a thirsty bard?”

Dean gestured at one of the two extra chairs at the table and signaled for another mug. It was considered bad manners and bad luck to turn down a request for a drink from a bard. He gave Sam’s thigh a squeeze of reassurance and a look that promised an explanation later, “You’re more than welcome to join us. We’re honored by your presence.”

Gabe seated himself and accepted the fresh mug from their waitress. “It’s not often I get to perform for such a handsome couple.” He looked both boys in the eye and raised his mug, “Here’s to many happy years for you both.”

They all drank and Dean mumbled his thanks.

“What did you guys think of the new songs?” Gabe looked from one to the other while waiting on their response.

“I liked them,” Dean spoke up. “This is the first time I’ve heard either of them. I’m sure that they’ll become favorites.” He nudged Sam’s knee under the table to both calm him and let him know that he should speak. He knew Sam wasn’t that familiar with the bardic customs.

Sam got the hint and turned on one of his brightest smiles. “They were well written and the melodies are memorable. You play very well.”

“Thank you both.” The bard drained his mug. “It’s been an honor to meet you and I hope you enjoy your evening.” He moved on to one of the other tables.

“Was that weird or is it just me?” Sam sipped at his ale and looked over at Dean.

“Bards are like that, they circulate around the room picking up compliments on their work and bits and pieces of gossip that they can add to future works. You’re just not used to them.” Dean refilled both their cups with the last of the ale in the pitcher. “We’ll stay and listen to his next set and head up. There’s almost as much superstition around bards as there is around mages but I think they mostly use those superstitions for effect, to make them seem more mysterious, more desirable than the run of the mill minstrel.”

“I don’t know, he made me feel like……like he knew us somehow.” Sam watched the bard as he made his way through the room stopping here and there for a quick word and drink. “I’m probably just anxious. It’ll be good to get away from all these people.”

Dean rubbed his thumb over the back of Sam’s hand hoping his touch would provide some measure of comfort for him and he leaned over and whispered, “I’ve got you baby, I’m here and no one’s going to hurt you. They’ll have to go through me and that’ll never happen.” 

The mage visibly relaxed the touch and the words doing their job and he sat back, eyes on the stage as the bard returned and began another tune after a brief check of his strings. The second set of tunes included a couple of requests and the songs were all upbeat. The patrons were again encouraged to sing and clap along with the music. There was no room in the small inn or there would probably have been a few people dancing as well. Dean caught the attention of their waitress and paid their bar tab during the set so that they could slip upstairs as the last chord resonated around the room. He’d already put a couple silvers in the bard’s case during his first performance and wouldn’t be expected to tip more than once a performance.

Once the bard announced his last song of the set Dean got prepared to head to the stairs as soon as possible, once the song ended and told Sam to be prepared. Neither of them was prepared to hear “The Rise of the Techno-mage” but the hunter knew it was a popular song and it was probably played more nights than not around the country. The mage had his hand in a death grip under the table and was having trouble not grinding his teeth but Dean didn’t want to leave during the song as that would draw more attention than he was comfortable with so they sat it out.

Sam waited until they were in their room to speak, “Do you think he knew? I told you it felt like he knew us.”

“Shhhhh, keep your voice down, even with the noise downstairs we don’t want to be overheard.” Dean locked their door and moved Sam to the bed and they both sat. The hunter wrapped an arm around the troubled mage and pulled him gently into a one armed embrace, “I don’t think he knew anything. The Rise is a popular song, even if it is full of lies and half-truths. People ask for it all the time and I’d be willing to bet that there’s not a minstrel or bard in the land that doesn’t know it. The Hunter’s song is popular too. Some things just don’t die. Remember that there’s no market here so the only time any of these people have ever seen a techno-mage is either on the road or at market in another town. No one here suspects that you are anything other than an extremely attractive man who has an even better looking partner and was burned.”

Sam smiled and put his head on Dean’s shoulder. “You’re way too modest hunter, we’ve got to work on your self-confidence!”

He’d known he could get Sam smiling with his last words and took his left hand in his and removed his glove so he could feel the warm metal skin it had been hiding. He held the amazing hand while he brushed the mage’s bangs away from his eyes, “you’re definitely getting at least your bangs trimmed tomorrow. I like to see your eyes.” He brought his hand up and placed a series of kisses across the palm while holding his gaze steady. “I love how they change color, they suit you. They are as unique as you are.”

The mage was relaxed enough to feel his dick begin to stir, but he figured he’d never be able to get hard. He didn’t want to risk being overheard or gods, even caught. He knew Dean was right about the song, but the bard made him almost as nervous as he’d been right after his attack. “Okay, but just my bangs, please.”

The hunter heard the fear in Sam’s voice and wanted to take the bard out back and slap him around a bit for making his mage so frightened again. Instead he helped Sam slip out of his clothes and into the comfortable bed. He used the small enclosed alcove where the chamber pot was kept to pee and rinsed in the wash basin before climbing in bed and pulling his mage close. “I’ve got you Sammy and I’m not letting go.” He laid a trail of kisses across his shoulder and up his neck to his ear. “You’re my forever.”

Sam turned so he was facing the hunter and tucked his head into one of his shoulders while holding his hand against their chests. “You’re my forever too, I’m not letting you go.”

“Good. You’re so good, Sammy.” Dean gently kissed the top of Sam’s head while drawing circles on his back letting his presence comfort the other man. He felt the featherweight kisses Sam was pressing to his neck and smiled. “Good night, baby boy. I’ve got you.”

Waking up to the sun coming through the window was a different feeling, one that Dean hadn’t thought he’d missed until that moment. At least the library was hidden and its inherent safety features was helping his mage’s recovery as much as anything else he’d done for him. He looked down at the messy bed head lying on his chest and was overwhelmed by the amount of love he felt for the young mage. He easily had the purest spirit of anyone he’d ever met and that spirit was still fighting to shine through despite how he’d been treated by the scum that took him. Dean knew he’d take on all comers to keep Sam safe and to protect the gentleness that made him so unique in their rough and sharp edged world.

Sam woke to gentle caresses, the steady beat of his love’s heart and the warmth of his body under him. He wished they could stay like this forever, or at least all day, but he was anxious to return to the library where he felt less exposed. He sighed as the hunter tangled his hands in his hair and he held on to him just a little tighter.

“Morning sunshine, I know you’re awake.” Dean tilted the mage’s head back so he could see what color his eyes were in the weak morning sun and lowered his head to place soft kisses across the broad forehead and down the straight nose that were begging to be kissed.

“Hey Dean, I didn’t dream last night. I thought I would.” The mage pushed himself up on the bed so he could kiss his hunter’s pouty mouth, paying special attention to his bottom lip.

“Keep that up little one and we won’t be going anywhere today.” The hunter adjusted himself slightly to accommodate his growing erection.

“Sorry, I…..,” Sam blushed and bit at his lower lip. “Sometimes I just can’t resist you.” He tried to roll away so he could get up but the hunter held him firmly in place.

Dean laughed the sound low and sexy as hell. “I didn’t say I didn’t like it.” He captured the mage’s mouth and worked his tongue inside kissing him deeply and very thoroughly. Pleased by the small grunts and moans his love was making, he swirled his tongue around the other man’s as he worked his in and out of the soft mouth under his. 

Sam’s tongue snaked its way around Dean’s and slipped into the other’s mouth to explore and claim all the surfaces he could reach. He reached one hand up behind Dean’s head and pulled him in even closer as if trying to lick the back of his throat, his other hand worked its way to the small of Dean’s back and pressed him into his lower belly and groin, moaning to the other’s mouth as their engorged and sensitive dicks made contact.

“You feel so good, so good baby boy,” Dean whispered as he kissed and licked at the sensitive skin under Sam’s ear as he thrust his hips up trying to keep contact with the other man’s now fully hard cock. “You okay?” The hunter had pulled their undergarments away and held both their cocks in one hand rubbing them together. “This okay?”

The mage groaned in response and pressed himself even harder against the other man thrusting faster into the hunter’s hand and against his rock hard cock. “M’okay,” Sam managed to moan out as he kept the motion up.

“Gods, Sam you feel so good, you’re so good. Want to make you feel good, too,” Dean kept moving his hand against both cocks, using the pre-come from both of them to lube his movements. He paid extra attention to the sensitive head and slit of Sam’s cock and jerked harder in response to every one of the small sounds he was making as he was approaching his climax. “Come on Sammy, come for me baby, want you to feel good, want to see you come.” The hunter’s breaths were shallow and rapid, he could feel his release building at the base of his spine and the pit of his stomach but he wanted the other man to come first so he concentrated on the younger man’s cock and never stopped talking in his low and lust driven voice.

“Dean, gods Dean, so good, I think….” Sam was breathless and knew he was close. He’d been able to keep the darker thoughts away by just concentrating on the man under him, the hand stroking his cock and the voice, ‘gods,’ he thought, ‘the voice’, that was coaxing him, encouraging him to let go and let the pleasure wash over him. “Fuck Dean……” He felt the force of his climax from the very base of his spine though his abdomen and then forced out through his cock as he spurted and spilled out over Dean’s hand and their stomachs. His mind went blank and all that existed for those seconds was their cocks, separate and yet together.

The hunter came seconds later, his spend mixing with the come coating his hand and both men’s bellies. He continued to stroke them both as he worked them through the last of the shocks traveling through their systems moving his hand only when he began to feel over sensitive. Dean slid his mage to his side and turned to face him. He raised the hand that was covered with essence of their combined pleasure and licked his hand. “We taste even better together.”

Sam groaned at the sight of his blissed out partner licking their come off his hand. He wondered if he’d ever stop finding everything the man did a turn on and reached out and pulled his hand toward his mouth. He took several of the slippery fingers into his mouth and let his tongue weave in, out and around them as he licked them clean, sighing when he released them again. He then leaned forward and pressed his lips to the other man’s, his tongue insisting on penetrating the plush lips so that he could taste their combined musk on his love’s tongue.

“You’re okay, right Sammy?” The hunter wasn’t just look for compliments, but was truly concerned for his partner. He shouldn’t have started anything while they were out of their safe house, but his mage was just so, so very desirable that he couldn’t help himself and he knew he’d have stopped had Sam asked.

The mage cradled his hunter’s face in his huge hand running his thumb along his jawline through the light scruff covering his face, “Yeah, I really am. I’m good.” He pressed a series of light kisses along Dean’s neck to emphasize his statement. “Felt so good, being with you is just……”

“It takes my words away, too.” Dean pulled the younger man closer, neither one bothered by the come cooling and drying on their bellies. “Everything about you is so very different…..I get tongue-tied.” They lay quietly in each other’s arms for a few minutes before rolling out of bed and getting dressed for the day. They needed to leave by early afternoon to get to their first campsite in a secluded cave formed from relics of the ancients and they still had to retrieve their weapons.

Breakfast was easy, there was no sign of the bard and both men were relaxed, happy and looking forward to getting back on the road and eventually home. Sam did well at the barber and he was able to neaten up his hair and get his bangs under control. They walked up and down the main street making sure they hadn’t overlooked anything and then headed to the inn and stable to get their things and hit the road.

“Should we buy something for dinner tonight so we don’t have to worry about a fire and cooking?” Dean asked even though he knew the answer would be yes, he was trying very hard to give Sam choices at every turn so he never felt like he had no control, figuring that if the situation had been reversed the lack of control would bother him the most.

“Yeah, sure, good idea, that makes the first night out easier.” Sam kept looking around as they walked back to the inn and stable.

“What are you looking for?”

“That bard, I……he makes me nervous. I’m probably being stupid but I had to trust my instincts when out on the road and I’ll be more comfortable if we don’t see him again before we leave.” Sam got a glimpse of his reflection in a window and decided he liked the haircut the barber had given him and he hoped Dean did as well. He hadn’t wanted it too short but it had been starting to annoy him a little bit.

They reached the stable without sighting the bard and Sam relaxed while he got their animals ready. Dean went inside to retrieve their things and anything that had been delivered that morning so they could get everything evenly distributed between the horses and the pack pony and evenly balanced so that the animals remained sound. He was busy grooming his horse, Patches, and didn’t hear anyone enter the stable. He was startled when someone appeared next to him. He drew his knife as he turned to the intruder.

“Shit! Don’t sneak up like that, I could’ve killed you.” Sam sheathed his knife and moved to put the horse between him and the bard.

“I didn’t catch your name last night, so couldn’t greet you by name.” The bard leaned against one of the stable walls, one leg crossed over the other, his guitar case slung over his shoulder. He was shorter than Dean and slight enough that Sam knew he could take him without breaking a sweat, but he still wasn’t comfortable in his presence.

“It’s Sam. What do you want?” The mage was brushing his horse affecting an air of nonchalance. 

“Didn’t anyone, your boyfriend maybe, teach you the importance of being polite to a bard?” Gabe moved around so he was on the same side of the horse as Sam. “It’s considered bad luck in some circles.”

“Not in mine.” He moved around the horse to work on the other side.

“You interest me, there’s just something about you……I can’t quite put my finger on it, but I’ll figure it out. Yeah, I’ll figure it out.” He walked away from Sam and got his horse from the stall he’d been assigned. “Safe travels Sam, I’m sure we’ll meet again.”

“Safe travels, bard,” Sam responded automatically, glad to see the back of the strange little man in his weird multi-colored cloak as he walked away. He was breathing easier as he finished grooming and saddling Patches and went to work on the other two animals. He couldn’t quite shake the uneasy feeling that Gabe gave him and nearly jumped out of his skin when Dean entered the stable.

“Hey, Sammy, you all right? You look white as a sheet.” Dean was at the mage’s side as quickly as possible and he put their things down to the side before putting a hand on the other man’s arm, “What happened?”

The mage turned and looked into the steady green eyed gaze and felt more relaxed with each breath he took. He took a step forward and pulled the hunter into a hug practically crushing him to his chest. “That bard, Gabe, was just here. He said he knows there’s something different about me but he couldn’t put his finger on it. I don’t think he’s just going to let this go, Dean. He scares me even though I know I could take him in a heartbeat.” 

Dean moved one of his hands to Sam’s head and cradled him against his shoulder like you’d comfort a child and even with the size difference the mage felt small and fragile in his arms. “I’ve got you, Sammy. I’m here and he won’t get past me. We’ll push as fast as we can without running the animals into the ground and get back home. He’ll never find it, it’s concealed. You’re safe with me. I promise I’ve got you.” Dean held his mage until his breathing had evened out again and then stepped away to start helping with the horses. “Let’s get these guys tacked up and loaded so we can take off. You’ll feel better once we’re away. Maybe staying over wasn’t the best idea I’ve ever had.”

“No Dean, it was great, I loved spending time with you here. I had fun. I’m sure you’re right when you say that guy is just strange and will be on his way and forget about this backwater. I know I’ve still got issues and I think strangers are going to be hard for me to take for a while, especially strangers who pay attention to me.”

“Yeah, I know baby. Tell you what we can set watches for the night so that one of us is always on guard. Would that help at all? I know you won’t feel completely safe until we’re back underground.” Dean had Balto groomed and was saddling him and adjusting his saddle bags for balance as Sam worked on getting Bert ready.

“I’d like to say I don’t need that but I think I’d like it, if you’re really okay with it.” The mage felt ashamed at his fear and planned to take first watch and let Dean sleep through the night since he didn’t think he’d be able to sleep, not without the dreams waking him anyway.

The hunter turned toward Sam, “Look at me.” He waited until the mage met his eyes, “I wouldn’t have offered if I didn’t mean to follow through. You are my….my baby, my love and I will protect you like I promised.”

“I know,” was the mage’s quiet response. “I’m just not used to someone caring.”

“You’ll get used it, I’ll make sure.” Dean checked the cinches on all the animals and led the two horses out of the stable. Sam followed with Bert. “Let’s get going, the sooner we’re home, the safer you’ll feel and we can work on getting you used to me caring.” The hunter mounted up and waited for Sam to mount and secure the pony before moving out.

“Thanks for understanding,” Sam said to Dean’s back causing the hunter to break into a wide grin but he didn’t acknowledge that he’d heard anything, unsure whether or not he was supposed to have heard the thanks.


	26. Home

The trip back to the library was relatively uneventful, they only ran across a couple of low level demons which were easily dispatched and they made it back in two days. Once there they fell into a comfortable routine of searching the library in the mornings for items to trade as well as for books written in languages with which Sam was familiar. Sam then spent the afternoons outside with the animals charging his arm while Dean dug around in the office attached to the garage area to see what information he could find about the carriages parked there and trying to figure out exactly how the carriages had been powered. Evenings were generally spent reading, with the hunter working through his new book and the mage continuing the work he’d started on the journal or playing chess. Sam was comfortable with this simple routine as it was very similar to how he’d spent his time before meeting Dean but he worried that the slow pace would begin to wear on a man used to more action.

They’d been home for a couple of weeks and Sam was sitting with his back against the garage door with a book when the skin on the back of his neck started to prickle and he got goose bumps on his arms. He looked around and saw a figure in the distance. Too far away to tell if it was a demon or human, but that didn’t matter much to Sam.

“Dean! Get out here!”

Alarmed by the near panic in Sam’s voice, the hunter dropped what he was doing and headed to the doors, “Sammy? What’s wrong?”

The mage gestured to the figure in the distance, still pretty far off, but no one could have missed the garage and the animals unless they were blind.

“Let’s get the animals in and shut the doors. At least we know the place won’t let just anyone walk in.”

Sam grabbed the halters of the two horses, leaving Bert for Dean. They had soon shut and secured the doors, “Should we activate the concealer on the doors?”

“I don’t know Sam. Would a building melting into the background be more or less of a target? We know this place won’t let demons pass and you couldn’t open the doors so I think if we give it a little time maybe whatever’s out there will lose interest and move on.” Dean hoped he was making the right call, but knew if he saw a building disappear he’d be more likely to hang around watching to see if it came back, “Can you use your will to try to discourage whatever it is from hanging around? You know, ‘there’s nothing to see here, move on’?”

“I can try. Whatever it is shouldn’t be expecting it, so in theory it should work as well as it did in the priory jail.”

The two men sat with their backs to the door as if adding their physical presence would provide enough of an additional barrier to discourage anyone from trying to break down the doors. They were on edge and sat in silence almost not daring to breathe. Time slowed down to a crawl and Sam was beginning to feel the panic begin to crawl up from deep in the pit of his stomach and work its way out his throat. Dean noticed Sam start to sweat and then watched as all color drained from his face. He reached out and grabbed his hand, which was like ice, in an effort to keep the younger man grounded and calm. They were safe behind the doors and could move deeper into the structure putting a couple additional sets of doors between them and anything that was brave enough to approach the door if necessary.

“Come on, Sam. Let’s go inside.”

“I don’t think I can stand right now. It feels like I’ve lost control of all my muscles,” the younger man was trying to concentrate on breathing deeply which was helping to dispel the sense of dread that had overtaken him with the first sight of the approaching figure. “Besides, if I’m going to try to ‘push’ whatever it is away I think I need to be closer. I’ll be all right, we can stay here.” He gripped Dean’s hand like it was all there was holding him in that time and space. “Please don’t let go.”

“I’ve got you.” Dean moved as close as he could and switched hands in order to put his arm around the mage’s shoulders. “I’m not going anywhere. Is there anything I can do to help?”

“You just being here helps. I hate feeling so weak,” Sam pulled his legs up to his chest in an effort to make himself smaller. “Do you think I’ll ever be able to forget?”

“I don’t know Sam, but you’re anything but weak. There’s nothing that can touch you when you’re working the quarterstaff and you’ve got that amazing arm. The cowards ambushed you, it was never a fair fight. There’s a lot I don’t know but one thing I do is that you’ve got to stop blaming yourself for what happened.” Dean pulled the younger man closer and held him a little tighter.

They sat waiting, each lost in his own thoughts with the only sounds those of the animals shifting their weight and chewing the fodder that they’d put down for them. Sam gripped Dean’s hand even tighter, turned his thoughts inside and collected his will before he tapped into some of his stored energy. Very carefully he sent a very small amount of both through the door and out into in the blasted lands searching for the being they’d seen approaching. Once he’d located the presence he focused his will on the words ‘nothing for you here, keep moving’ and using his energy ‘pushed’ the thought into the other’s head.

“Shit!” Sam pulled his hand away and used both hands to hold his head. “Fuck! Gods that hurts!”

“What Sam? What hurts?” Dean leapt to his feet and looked out one of the dirty windows relieved to see that the other was still some distance away.

“My head, I sent my will out and it hit something, like a wall and bounced back on me. It’s almost like a knife splitting my head.” He looked up and lowered his hands.

“You’re bleeding!”

Sam brushed at the blood trickling from his nose. “I guess whatever’s out there didn’t want me messing around in its head. Thanks.” The mage took the bit of cloth that Dean found to help staunch the blood. “It doesn’t seem like its bleeding that badly.”

“Has that ever happened before?” the hunter sat back down.

“Yes, in the beginning when I first tried using my ability I’d get a headache after trying for a while and a nosebleed every now and then, but nothing like this. This was like the thought was actually turned back and used against me, maybe as punishment for trying? I don’t really know.”

“Do you need some morphia? I can go get it,” Dean moved to get up but the mage stopped him with a hand on his arm.

“No, it’ll go away, I want to stay sharp until we know what’s out there.” The bleeding had stopped but his head was still pounding. He wanted nothing more than to lay in a dark room and sleep.

Dean relaxed again and put his arm back around his friend. “Have you ever tried using your will on a demon?”

“No, I’ve barely used it on humans, just the brothers who were guarding you. I didn’t have to use it at all in town either time. Maybe I’ve used it too much, it’s not like there’s a lot of reference material for whatever this is.” Sam laughed and rolled his neck to try to loosen up the muscles that had tightened when the pain hit.

“Maybe it is demon kind. We know the crossroads demons couldn’t break in here and maybe that’s true of demons in general. Never thought I’d be hoping a demon was coming after me.” Dean shook his head at the thought and stood to check on the stranger’s progress. “Whatever it is hasn’t turned away. Let’s go deeper inside, you know your will won’t help so it won’t matter if we’re underground.” He helped the mage to his feet and they were headed to the stairs leading down into the depths of the library when the stranger began pounding on the door. Dean was still herding Sam toward the stairs when the voice that joined the pounding stopped them in their tracks.

“Hello the….whatever this place is,” this was followed by more pounding, “Sam I know you’re in there, I can feel you.”

Already pale, Sam swallowed hard and lost even more color, “It’s the bard.” He gripped his head again and fell to his knees retching as the pain in his head intensified and spread down through his body.

“Sam!”

“I’m hearing him inside my head.” The mage was now laying on his side curled into the fetal position with his eyes closed. “Make him stop whatever he’s doing. I can’t stand it.”

Dean was torn between picking the stricken man up and carrying him inside and killing the bard who was causing him this much pain. He drew Honor and Courage and went to the door looking back once at Sam before answering the summons. “Bard! Stop whatever it is you’re doing, you’re killing him!” He threw the doors open, knocking Gabe off his feet. Dean was standing over him with a blade on either side of his neck before he could speak, “Stop. It. Now. Or I’ll take your head off.”

The bard locked eyes with the hunter, his gaze almost drilling through Dean’s head. “Just him then,” was his cryptic comment.

“Now!” Dean let the blades lightly graze the other’s man’s skin drawing blood. “Don’t push me.”

“Dean!” Sam called from the garage. He was sitting up, soaked in sweat but no longer writhing in pain. “Let him go.”

“Listen to the young mage, hunter. I bear you no ill will, I can help.” Gabe lay very still, his eyes still locked on Dean’s. Sam staggered to his feet and joined the two just outside the door but he was shaky and used the door to help keep him upright.

“Let him go, I want to hear what he has to say. Make him swear on the blades if you have to, but let’s hear him out.”

“Do you know what a vow sealed with the blades entails?” Dean ground the words out through clenched teeth.

“I do and I will take the oath.” The bard was still flat on his back, the blades resting on his bloody neck. “Have I spilled enough blood to seal the vow?”

“Swear on the blades and by whatever you hold holy that no harm will come to Sam or me by your hand or by information you pass on to someone else now or in the future. In return I will swear that you will be safe here until you take your leave or lift a hand against either of us. Stand.” Dean backed off and Sam offered the bard a hand to help him up. The hunter crossed the blades in front of him, “I swear on Honor and Courage that no harm will come to you during your stay here unless you lift a hand against Sam or me,” Dean used Honor to score his right palm and held Courage out to the Bard, “Swear and cut.”

“I swear on this hunter’s blades, Honor and Courage, that no harm will EVER come to the hunter or the mage at my hand or by information I’ve passed on either now or in the future,” the bard used Courage to cut his right hand and held it out to the hunter.

Dean clasped the bard’s hand. “Repeat after me, I will uphold this vow as long as the blood runs in both our veins or I will forfeit my life.” He waited for the bard to repeat the vow, “Do you accept this vow in brotherhood?”

“In brotherhood,” intoned the bard. He looked over at Sam. “Does that reassure you that I bear you no ill will?”

The hunter used the edge of the bard’s cloak to wipe the blades clean earning him a dirty look and an exclamation of outrage. Dean shrugged as he walked away to sheath his weapons, “Hunter’s prerogative.”

“What did you do to me?” Sam was still nauseated and shaky. He felt like he had the worst hangover known to man and gods.

“Let’s go in, I have something that should take the edge off for you and I’ll explain.” Gabe tried to pull the doors closed and they refused to move.

“What the hell?” He tried even harder with no more success. Sam laughed even though it hurt like a bitch. “They don’t know you.” He smiled at the bard’s puzzled look. “They’ve only just started working for me, we’ll try to explain.” Sam pulled the doors closed and activated the concealer. He staggered again, still not steady on his feet but shrugged off the arm the bard offered him and waited for Dean. The hunter was wearing his blades and a couple of knives, “I’ve got him, head down the stairs we’re right behind you.”

They worked their way through the library complex to the kitchen area where Dean helped Sam into a chair and turned to the bard who was looking around almost as if he wasn’t sure what he was seeing was real. “Bard! You said you had something that could help him, let’s go.”

“Yeah, I do. What is this place?” Gabe pulled out a medicine pouch similar to Sam’s and looked around. “I need hot water, where’s the fire?”

Dean chuckled as he turned the burner to high and set a kettle of water on the spiral to come to a boil, “It’s right here, we call it the cooker. This place is pretty amazing. We’ve been calling it a library, but it’s more than books.” The hunter looked toward Sam for confirmation.

The mage smiled, “It’s a lot more than books and we’ve not quite figured out who put this here or why Dean’s the only one who can open the doors.” He winced as pain tore through his head again.

“I’m really sorry, Sam.” The bard sat across from him. “I knew you had a strong psych ability but I didn’t know no one had taught you how to block. I used enough energy to push through a block but nothing was there. The tea will help ease the after effects.”

The hunter poured hot water into three cups and added their regular tea to two of them and brought them all to the table. “What’s he got? Can it be cured?”

Gabe smiled as he went about mixing the herbal tea he used to soothe the effects of using too much mind power. “Do you have sugar or honey? It will go down better if it’s sweetened.”

Dean got up again and brought the honey pot to the table. “You didn’t answer me. Is he going to be all right?”

“Yes, he’ll be fine.” He slid the cup across the table to Sam. “Let it cool slightly but drink it as hot as you can stand it. You’ve had these headaches before haven’t you?”

Sam nodded, “Not nearly as bad, but yes. I’ve also had nosebleeds and nausea.”

“It only happens when you use your mind to do something or influence someone, right?” The bard took his cloak off and folded it carefully before setting it on another one of the chairs. “When did you realize what you could do with your mind?”

The mage blew gently on the liquid in his cup more as a tactic to gather his thoughts than to the cool the drink in his hand. It was still boiling hot. “After the third surgery, I was in the infirmary recovering. I was in pain and I was thinking of calling Jolene,” Dean winced at her name, “to bring some more morphia. I know I didn’t call out to her, but she brought the tea to me, anyway. I asked her how she knew and she said she heard me ask her for it, but I know I didn’t.” Sam concentrated on his cup again and took a healthy slug of the still very hot and really foul tasting concoction, “Gods I hope this works because it is terrible.”

Gabe smiled, “It works, I blend it myself. It’s the only thing that stops the pain when I’ve overused the gift.”

“Wait. Are you saying you can do what Sam does? How is that possible? How is any of it possible?” Dean got up once more and brought a bottle of whiskey to the table. “Sam thought his surgery had something to do with this ‘gift’. Are you cyborg?”

“Drink it Sam, it helps, I promise. No, I’m not cyborg and as far as I can tell the gift is something you are born with or acquire in infancy. The nanites used to join the cybernetic limb with his body may have flipped a switch in Sam’s brain allowing him to realize his gift. Some people seem to be born with the ability to access areas of the brain that are normally dormant, sleeping. This allows them to use their minds for any number of things that most people can’t. Some have the ability to move things with their mind, others can send out thoughts, like Sam. There are others who are even stronger and can compel people and animals to do things. Everyone realizes their gift at different times. The awakening of these dormant areas is often associated with a traumatic event.”

Sam finished the vile tea and chased it with a shot of whiskey, mostly to get the taste out of his mouth. “You have a name for this ability or gift, what was it?”

“Psyche is the Greek goddess of the soul. It was said she could see into the souls of men and women in order to judge them. I call the gift psych or psy ability because I can see into the minds of others which reminded me of Psyche. I knew who and what you were when I first saw you. The thought of a hunter and a techno-mage working together was certainly intriguing.”

“Yeah? Well, we’re not anyone’s intrig-whatever!” Dean glared at the bard, daring him to make a move on him.

“Relax, Dean. It just means he finds us interesting, it’s ok.” Sam put his hand on the other man’s arm. “I’m feeling better, he was right, that vile tea of his is helping,” the mage turned his attention back to the bard. “So you looked into my mind and could see this gift?”

“No. I could sense the presence of another gifted person in the room. I get a feeling like bugs crawling on my skin when I’m around another person like us. I didn’t pin it down to you until I played “The Rise”. Your discomfort came through loud and clear. You don’t even realize that you unconsciously broadcast your ability, do you? I was certain after I sat with you and no, Dean, I didn’t have to read you to know you were a hunter. You carry yourself like one even when you’re not wearing your blades.”

Dean sat back in his chair, he had been about to ask how the bard how he knew he was a hunter. “OK, but this is like magic, right?”

Sam laughed, “Dean’s been hung up on magic since we met. I think he wants magic to exist even though he’s terrified of the possibility….”

“I am NOT terrified! I’m not even scared…..well, okay, maybe a little scared, but who wouldn’t be? Smart people are scared of magic and Gabe, I know about technology.”

“I’m scared shitless of magic,” Gabe admitted, “I can’t deal with the thought of people pulling things out of nowhere and then making them vanish again. You’re right, smart people are scared of the unexplained.”

“So, this mind stuff isn’t magic, but it’s not technology either. What is it?” Dean wasn’t being deliberately obtuse he was really trying to understand something that defied explanation.

“That’s a good question, hunter and I don’t have a good answer for you. I was hoping that maybe Sam here had knowledge that the priories were keeping from the rest of the population, but it seems that’s a dead end.”

“Sorry Gabe. I’d like answers myself in fact I’m not even sure exactly what I can do. The ability scares me and I do get these headaches when I overdo it. All along I’ve thought that the ability was tied to the energy I can store in my arm, but I guess that may not be true.” He looked at the bard for confirmation.

“It may or may not help your ability. I’d say it’s entirely possible that you can boost your natural ability with your stored energy, there’s just so much that’s not known. You haven’t run across anything in the books here, have you?”

“No, but I haven’t been looking. In the priory I studied history, particularly the time before, during and right after the demon wars. My hope has been to figure out what caused the influx of demon kind and try to reverse engineer a way to send them back to hell all at once. It’s slow going.” Sam was still holding Dean’s hand and rubbed his thumb on the palm silently letting him know he was all right.

Dean stood and pulled Sam up with him. “Would you excuse us for a couple of minutes? We’ll be right back. Come on, Sam.” They stopped when they got into the library proper. “You want him to stay don’t you?”

“Yeah, kind of,” Sam shrugged, “I don’t know anyone else with this ‘gift’ or whatever. At the very least I’d like to learn to blend that tea, it really helped.”

The hunter was leaning against one of the tables looking down at his feet. “Yeah, learning about the tea would be good, I just…..”

Sam wrapped his arms around the smaller man and pulled him in close until he felt the other man’s arms wrap around his back. “If it makes you that uncomfortable we get the ingredients for the tea, feed him and send him on his way. He’s sworn to not use his knowledge of this place against us.”

They held their embrace for a few minutes, each marveling at how perfect it felt to be held by the other. Dean turned his head into the mage’s neck and kissed him gently before drawing back slightly so he could look up at him. “No, we don’t need to send him away that quickly but I will throw him out if he makes you that sick again or you start to feel uncomfortable with him around. I’m pretty sure I could take him even with his gift and I know you could!” He smiled and kissed Sam before heading back into the kitchen.

“So Gabe,” Sam took his seat, “would you like to stay here with us and see if you can find anything in the books about our gift? We all pitch in on the chores and we’ll have to head back to Marshalltown a little earlier than planned to resupply. We would understand if you’d rather not, it’s pretty isolated here and different from the bardic lifestyle,” Sam smiled and kicked Dean’s foot so that he smiled as well.

The bard sat back in his chair and considered the offer. He’d certainly never seen anything like the library and if nothing else it would make for some great songs. “It occurs to me that we don’t necessarily have to make any firm decisions today. How about I stay a couple of days and then we can all re-evaluate the arrangement. I’ve sworn to not hurt or expose you and I won’t. If I decide to move on your secret will die with me and I will teach Sam how to blend the headache remedy either way. What do you think?”

Sam spoke first, “Great idea, right Dean?”

“Yeah, that works. Come on Gabe. It’s Sam’s turn to fix dinner so I can show you around a bit while he gets to it. You are not going to believe the bathroom.” Dean led the way through the door with the little bard in tow.

The mage surveyed their supplies and settled on a fairly simple dinner of cornbread and beans. He planned to make dessert as well. He knew Dean was feeling a little insecure in the presence of the bard and the dessert would be one way that Sam could show him that there wasn’t room in his life for anyone else. He knew what else he could do to cement that for the hunter, but was still afraid and he hated the fact that he couldn’t move past that one night. Grabbing what he needed from their pantry he concentrated on cooking and letting the hurtful thoughts go without much success.

“This is Sam’s and my room, you can take any other room you want. You may have to pick through a couple of them to find the nicest blankets but they’re mostly in really good shape. Here’s the bathroom.” Dean opened the door and stepped inside gesturing for Gabe to follow. “Those enclosures across the room are called showers. Watch.” Dean turned the handles in the first enclosure and started the water.

“Incredible! Where does it come from?” Gabe stepped forward and held his hand under the cascade of water. “I assume you’ve tested it and it’s clean?” He waited for Dean’s nod of assent, “It’s getting warmer! How are you doing that? I didn’t detect any psych ability in you.”

Dean laughed, “I’m not doing anything and you’re right, I have none of that psych thing you and Sam have. There’s a machine in the control room that keeps water hot and then sends it to you when you turn the handle marked with an ‘H’. It works at the sinks, too,” Dean gestured to the three sinks across the room. “I told you this place was amazing, but wait until you see the chamber pots, the plans called them toilets.” Dean led the bard to one of the toilet stalls and demonstrated its self-cleaning ability. “We keep cleansing cloths by the sink. It’s your responsibility to wash what you use, house rules.”

“No problem hunter. As you said, this is amazing and I’m honored that you invited me to stay,” the bard used the handle to flush another one of the toilets. “Just fucking amazing.”

“Sam can show you the drawings he found that show all the levels, storage areas and something called ‘labs’. Sam says those are like work stations for building technologies. You can clean up if you want and then join us back in the kitchen. You remember the way?”

“Thanks Dean. Yes, I can find my way back and thank you, I’ll choose a room and I will take this chance to clean up.” He started out the door but stopped and turned back to the hunter. “I can see how much he means to you and you to him. I’m not here to change that. I’ve only met a couple of other people who share our ability and I can help him. We can help each other.” He waited as Dean considered his words.

“I’d do anything for Sam and if you can help him I will be in your debt and I always repay what I owe.” The hunter started toward the door and the bard let him pass. “Take your time. We’ll eat once you join us in the kitchen.” Dean headed back to the kitchen leaving the bard to his shower.

“So what powers this place?” Gabe was finished with his meal and sat back in his chair. “It seems like there are a pretty large number of things drawing on whatever your source is.”

Sam gestured toward the cooker. “Would you like more? I made plenty.” The bard shook his head and Sam continued, “It’s solar with a back-up system that’s called a ‘fusion generator’. I haven’t found anything yet that explains what that is. I did find the solar collection panels outside. They are well hidden and like the rest of the place they are in great condition. The control room has a number of solar cells and as one drains the system switches to the next fully charged cell. We haven’t had a failure since we found the place, but we’re only using a small portion of what’s here.” Sam got up and refilled Dean’s plate. “Don’t forget, I made dessert, too.”

Dean smiled his thanks at the mage. “You’re lucky it was his night to cook. He’s much better at it than I am. They actually teach them in the priories, I’m learning from him.”

“They don’t teach cooking at the bardic college either we’re encouraged to ‘sing for our supper’ as it were. I’ve picked up a few things over the years but I rely on dried fruit and nuts in between towns when I travel. Speaking of that, I left my horse about a mile or so out, I didn’t want to spook your animals. Would it be possible for me to bring him here?”

“Of course,” Sam replied. “I turn the animals out once a day and guard them while charging my arm. It’s hard to find fodder for them, but we do buy or trade for grain on our monthly supply runs.”

“Thank you. I have my own funds so you won’t need to support me. I’m happy to contribute to the household. My horse will be safe where he is tonight, I’ll get him tomorrow. I’ve got some supplies with me as well.”

“Sounds good,” Dean was nearly finished with his seconds. “I can go with you if you’d like, we both can.” The hunter looked to Sam who nodded as he got up to clear their plates.

“Gabe you can be on dish duty tonight if you want to help out.” Sam refilled the kettle and put it on to boil while he got their mugs for tea and dished out the pear crumble.

“My pleasure, I’d do them every night just to play with the water. The system here is unbelievable.” Gabe accepted his dessert with a nod of thanks. “I’ve never seen anything like it, and I’ve traveled quite a bit. You said earlier that Dean is the only one who can open the doors?”

Sam was filling their mugs so Dean spoke up, “Yeah. I found the place a couple of years ago, a different entrance than you saw today, and used it to get away from a bunch of crossroads demons. They couldn’t get the door open at all and it had just worked for me. When I brought Sam here, he tried and he couldn’t work the doors either, even when I showed him where the latch was located.”

“Interesting and you have no psych ability. I wonder why and how the place can be so selective.” Gabe added a bit of honey to the tea Sam handed him.

“He was bleeding the first time he opened the door. We wondered if that didn’t have something to do with it. Did you try the garage doors before you pounded on them?”

“No, I didn’t. They didn’t want to close for me though.”

“Yeah, they’ve only started closing for me and we’ve been here about six weeks. I still can’t open them from the outside.” Sam nodded toward the hunter, “He’s still the only one who can unlock the place.”

“Have you tried bleeding on the door? This is really good, you are an excellent cook.”

“Thanks. No I haven’t tried bleeding. So far it’s not been a problem that only Dean can work the doors from the outside. I haven’t found anything referencing the construction of this place other than the plans Dean mentioned. I’d really like to know who built it and why it’s here. There’s so much material here we could spend the rest of our lives looking through it and not get to it all.”

The next few days passed quickly. Gabe fit himself into their established routines and spent some of his time exploring the other areas himself trying to get an idea of why the underground library complex had been built. He and Sam worked together in the afternoons to explore the extent of Sam’s psych ability while watching the animals and their evenings now included the tales and songs Gabe had picked up as he traveled from town to town. Despite the ease with which the three men seemed to settle into their routine there were still many things left unsaid as they all worked toward friendship. Gabe could feel the wall Sam had built to contain the trauma he’d endured when they were working together but didn’t question the mage about it figuring if he wanted him to know he’d eventually share and until then he could ignore it just as easily as asking questions.

About a week before they planned to travel to Marshalltown to resupply, Dean woke to Sam’s screams. He was caught in a nightmare or a flash back and was curled under the desk in their room crying out to be left alone and screaming in terror when whatever he was seeing didn’t back off. Dean was up and trying to approach him in a heartbeat but Sam wasn’t hearing anything but what his mind was showing him. He’d pushed Dean away a couple of times and was breathing hard and sweating, his eyes were open but he was clearly not seeing anything but the dream images.

Gabe approached their door, uncertain whether or not he should offer assistance and conscious of invading their private quarters uninvited. He knocked hard enough to be heard over the cries, shouts and screams coming from the room. “Dean, Sam, do you need help? Is there anything I can do?”

The hunter heard Gabe at the door and debated briefly before pulling his pants on and opening the door, “Hey Gabe, yeah I need help. I can’t reach him.”

The bard entered the room cautiously not wanting to frighten the mage any more than he already was, but realized almost immediately that he wasn’t present in that time and space. “What happened?”

Dean ran a hand over his face and through his hair, ‘I need a haircut’ he thought, as he considered how much of Sam’s ordeal he should share with the bard.

“I need to know if I’m going to be of any help. I don’t want to hurt him further,” the bard’s voice was kind and gentle, “I will hold it secret.”

“He was,” Dean sighed, “captured by some hunters who were trying to punish me. They held him for less than a day but,” the hunter looked to his friend, his love still fighting away the nightmare images his mind had dredged up, “they…..he was………” he blinked away the tears that were forming as he spoke, “raped, they raped and beat him senseless before I could get to him. It’s been a while since he’s had a nightmare that was this bad. It happened almost nightly after I found him, but I could always get him back. This time he can’t hear me.” Dean sat on the edge of their bed feeling defeated.

“Thank you. Sometimes severe trauma can cause these kinds of episodes, it’s one of the ways the mind works itself through things that are too painful to talk about while awake. Let me see if I can reach him.”

The bard sat on the floor a couple of feet away from where Sam was still fighting off his attackers and concentrated on reaching into the frightened man’s mind. _“Sam, Sam. Can you hear me Sam? You are at home and safe,”_ the bard kept sending this same message over and over hoping that if the mage grabbed onto it he could pull him out of his head.

_“Gabe?”_ the small bard was suddenly in the cabin with Sam and his attackers. He was standing to one side and appeared transparent.

_“Sam! Yes, it’s Gabe. Can you follow me?”_

_“I don’t think so, I’m tied down,”_ Sam’s eyes locked on the bard’s and his panic ratcheted up a notch, _“I can’t move!”_

_“You can Sam. You can stand up and walk away. This is a memory of something that’s already happened. You are not trapped here.”_

_“Make them stop!”_

_“Sam! Stand up and walk toward me. You aren’t bound by anything but your mind, release it.”_

Dean watched the two trying to see some kind of change in Sam and got worried when it seemed like he was getting even more terrified as he struggled trying to free himself from invisible bindings.

“Gabe it’s not working!”

“Give me a couple more minutes Dean, I’ve reached him, I just have to convince him it’s not real.” The bard turned his attention back to the mage.

_“Gabe? Where are you? Where did you go?”_

_“Right here Sam, I had to reassure Dean you were going to be all right.”_

_“Dean? Where?”_

_“_ _Good, that’s good. We’re going to go to Dean but you have to get up and walk toward me. You can do it Sam,”_ The bard continued to repeat his words as he watched the young man work himself free of the ropes that held him. _“Good Sam, you’re not bound here, you’re free. Get up and take a step to me.”_

Sam could still see the gang that had held him, but they were frozen in place and one by one the ropes holding him fell away. Afraid to move he looked frantically at the bard.

_“You’re free Sam, they can’t hurt you any more, come to me and we’ll find Dean.”_ The bard held out his hand both in his mind and physically where he sat.

The hunter saw the change in Sam as he started to come out of his nightmare. His muscles relaxed and the fear started to drain from his face. He lifted one of his arms and held it out to the bard.

_“That’s it Sam, keep moving toward me. We’re almost there.”_ Gabe took Sam’s hand and guided him out from under the desk.

“Dean’s right here.” He nodded to the hunter who stood and pulled Sam into his arms.

“I’ve got you baby boy, you’re safe, they can’t hurt you anymore.” Dean guided Sam to the bed and sat him on the edge. He brushed the tears from his face and followed his hands with kisses not caring that they weren’t alone in the room. “You’re safe, I’ve got you now. Shhhhhh, it’s all over, they’re gone.”

Gabe opened the door and hesitated, “We’ll talk tomorrow. I think I can help him but I’ll need your help to do so.” He saw the hunter nod as he slipped out the door to allow them privacy.

“Shhhhh, Sammy. It’s over and you’re safe,” Dean was sitting beside Sam and held him as closely as he could.

“Dean?” “Yeah, baby, it’s me and we’re at home.” Dean pressed light kisses against Sam’s shoulder and on his neck under his ear. “You’re safe, Sam. No one can get you here.” He felt the other man shiver and he helped him lay down. He crawled into bed with him and drew the quilt over them both before pulling the younger man into his arms. “I’ve got you baby boy, I’ve got you.”

Sam curled himself around the hunter so that he could touch as much of him as possible. “Got you too, Dean. Love you.”

“I love you too Sammy. Try to go back to sleep, I’ll keep watch.” Dean was still kissing any skin he could reach and had one hand tangled in the sweaty hair at the back of his mage’s head. “I’ve got this Sammy.”


	27. Solutions

The guys were up and on the road early the next day. Sam had slept the rest of the night but no one was really well rested and they traveled through the day without much conversation. They stopped to spend the night at the same grove of trees that Sam and Dean had used on their previous trip to Marshalltown, it was off the main rood and somewhat protected. Despite that the three men decided to take turns keeping watch. Dean took care of the animals, Gabe gathered wood for their fire and got it started and Sam put together a simple meal. After dinner Gabe brought out his guitar and practiced a few of the songs he was planning to play at the Inn until the fire burned low.

“I’ll take first watch,” Gabe volunteered.

“I’m on second and Sam can take third.”

“You just want me on third so I’ll have tea and breakfast ready when you get up,” Sam grumbled for form’s sake. He was tired and wanted nothing more than to sleep.

“See Gabe, I told you he was the smart one!” Dean rolled out their blankets before heading off to pee before bed.

Sam approached the bard still somewhat embarrassed by his breakdown the previous night. “Hey, I didn’t get a chance to thank you last night for pulling me out. It always feels real when I’m trapped in the dreams, but it was worse last night and I’m not sure I’d have made it out without you.”

“It’s okay Sam. Our minds handle severe trauma by locking it away where it can’t hurt you. When you’re sleeping or when something reminds you of the event it can come rushing back. It’s not unusual and it can go away. I’m sorry you suffered.” Gabe didn’t look up at Sam feeling his embarrassment but wanted the mage to know that what he was dealing with was normal. “I’m sure you’ll sleep better tonight.”

“Yeah, well, thanks. I appreciate it.” Sam headed to his blankets and settled down to wait for Dean’s return. He was so tired that he drifted off as soon as his head hit the ground and didn’t hear the hunter when he returned to the fireside.

Gabe called the hunter over when he returned. “Sam’s asleep. Can we talk?”

“Sure,” Dean sat next to the bard, their backs against a tree. “What’s on your mind?”

“Sam. I told you last night that I think I can help him and I mean that, but I’m going need a few more details about what happened.”

The hunter sighed, he hated thinking about how he’d found Sam. He knew it was worse for Sam, but he couldn’t forget the sight of the bloody, bruised and abused body he’d cut down from the rafters. “Yeah, of course, anything.”

“What happened to the men who hurt him?”

“The animals?” Dean snorted, “I killed them and took their bodies about a mile away from the priory cabin where they’d held and tortured him.” Dean’s voice was flat, almost emotionless as he held back the anger he still felt when he thought of what Sam had been through.

“Does Sam know? Did he see you kill them?”

“He knows. I told him, but most of them I took care of before I got to Sam, he heard the last one die even though he asked me if it was necessary. It was necessary.”

“How did you….”  
“Why do you need to know that? How is that going to help him?” Dean struggled to keep his voice down.  
“The more I know the better I’ll be able to help. Indulge me and I’ll answer your questions while I explain how I think I can help.”

“Three of them I killed by slitting their throats, the fourth I ran through with Honor. They all died quickly, with very little pain. If it wouldn’t have hurt Sam worse, I’d have sliced the last one to bits through the day and night, letting him bleed out slowly before finally putting him out of his misery.” Dean’s words trailed off to silence and both men sat listening to the crackling of the fire for several long minutes.

“You loved him and you blamed yourself.” The bard’s voice was quiet and filled with empathy and respect.

“Hell yes on both counts and I still do.” Dean looked toward the sleeping mage hoping he’d be able to keep the dreams at bay that night. “I’d do anything it takes to help him. I’d leave if that was the only way. If you had seen him, seen what they’d done…” The hunter paused and shook his head. “There are nights when I’d be willing to resurrect the scum in order to kill them again for what they did.”

“He doesn’t blame you. That was made clear when I was in his head last night. The only other people in the dream were the four attackers. He had trouble pulling himself out of his head until I mentioned that we were going to see you. You represent safety to him. He loves you very much and counts on you being there for him.” The bard stopped talking to give Dean some time to filter through his words.

“But I wasn’t there for him! I left him alone. I knew Terry and his gang were out to cause trouble for me but I thought I’d lost them in town. I shouldn’t have left him.” Dean choked up just slightly but was able to bite back his tears.

“That may be, but he doesn’t see it that way. He blames the others and sees you as his savior. I think his disconnect comes from the fact that he didn’t actually see the others die or even see their remains. While he knows what you’ve told him and believes you, the part of his mind where he’s stored the trauma can’t accept that they are truly gone and so replays the event to remind him that they could still be out there. It’s a warped warning system.”

“How do you know so much about this anyway? Do you study this at bard school?”

“No, not at all, I have a much more personal experience with it. My sister was a techno-mage. You know that not all of them are cyborg and that many voluntarily choose to join that order. She was intelligent, so bright it was almost frightening and she wanted, no craved, a life spent studying books, art, music and such looking for answers to questions that hadn’t even been asked yet. Our parents let Adari begin studying at our local priory when she was twelve. She took her vows at eighteen and was dead at twenty-one.” Gabe looked into the fire trying to see his sister’s face, not as it was the last time he saw her but as it was when she was happy. 

“She was taken while on a market run. Adari didn’t travel alone but the other mage was killed in the initial attack. They took her and, well, treated her much like those who took Sam treated him. Other brothers found her barely alive and got her back to her priory where they treated her body, but her mind never healed. She remained trapped with the memories of what she’d endured. I saw her a week before she threw herself from the walls surrounding her priory. She was a ghost of her former self, afraid of shadows and the smallest sounds. I went into her head and tried to help her see that she could move past her terror, move past the pain but she had no gift and wasn’t strong enough to handle the dreams and anxiety. She didn’t have someone like you in her life and in this case, I wasn’t enough.”

Dean didn’t really know how to respond to the bard’s story. At least he still had Sam and as difficult as it was at times he knew he’d keep trying for him, keep loving him through each episode. He couldn’t imagine losing him. “I’m sorry.”

“Thanks. Anyway, I’ve thought a lot about Sam today and I think if we can show him that his attackers are actually dead, we could help him move past that one night. Help his mind start healing the wounds it still bears.”

“How?”

“Here’s where I’ll really need your help. I need to see what you saw as you killed them I need to be you as you kill them. Once I’ve got your memories I’ll show them to Sam. I’ve never tried this but my instinct tells me that it should work. Once Sam accepts that his tormentors are gone for good the part of his mind that keeps trying to warn him should eventually quiet down and fade away to a regular memory.” Gabe looked over at the hunter and was encouraged when he didn’t reject his proposal outright.

“I’ve got to think about this and we have to tell Sam what we’re doing. I don’t want him to go into anything unprepared for what he might see. I can’t lose him, unless it’s the only way to heal him.”

“Of course, take your time. This isn’t something we should try while away from your home anyway. He’ll need to feel as safe and as comfortable as possible and I will explain it all to him and we’ll let it be his decision. Agreed?”

“Agreed, let’s not even bring it up until we’re done with this trip. Unless we have to for his sake.” Dean got up and walked over to his blankets at Sam’s side. “You know Gabe, he means everything to me.”  
“I know that hunter. Anyone who looks at the two of you knows. I’ll wake you in a few hours, sleep well.”

They stayed two nights in town. Gabe’s return to Marshalltown after just a few weeks created a festive atmosphere in the town. Everyone who had seen him perform the last time along with those who missed out previously, packed the inn’s main room begging to hear their favorites again and anything new he wanted to share. There was no room for dancing but the townsfolk were bouncing in place and clapping and stomping along where appropriate and even when it wasn’t. The shop owners were more generous with their trades since the boys were no longer strangers in town and had arrived in the company of the bard.

Pleased with the successful shopping trip, all three men were in good spirits as they left Marshalltown to head back to the library. The horses carried heavy loads and they anticipated the return trip would take closer to three days since they were dismounting and walking next to their mounts at least half of the time in order to keep them sound. 

They were halfway through the second day when Sam stopped them while he sent his consciousness out in search of the sounds that had attracted his attention. “Demons, four of them and I think they’re crossroads. They’re about a half a mile over that rise,” he pointed to the east.

“How did you do that?” Gabe wanted to know.

“He can explain later. Will you stay here with the horses? Sam and I can take care of them,” Dean checked to make sure his weapons were in place while Sam unstrapped his quarterstaff from Bert’s pack.

“Yes, but I could help. Didn’t you put the concealers on the saddles?” Gabe was torn. He didn’t really want to fight demons but didn’t really want his new friends to think he was a coward.

“I did,” answered Sam, “but stay here with them anyway, there’s just four and we’ve got it covered.”

“What’s your weapon? A knife?” Dean asked. Gabe nodded yes. “You’d never get close enough to use it unless you’re good at throwing knives. Sam and I would both have to make sure we didn’t catch you in the radius of our weapons. This time it’s in everyone’s best interest for you to stay with the animals and make sure this isn’t some kind of diversion.”

“Activate the concealers after you lose sight of us and keep a hand on one of the horses. If anything comes sniffing around after we leave stay as quiet as possible and watch to see what direction they go,” Sam worked a couple of forms with the staff as he spoke to loosen his muscles up.

“If you guys are sure,” Gabe sheathed his knife and made note of where the concealers were located, “I’ll just wait and guard.”

“Thanks Gabe,” the two warriors headed off in the direction Sam had indicated. “We’ll be back soon.”

The bard had been hoping to actually see the two in action. He watched plenty of their drills while guarding the grazing horses at the library but figured it would be different to actually see them in battle. On the other hand he was pretty attached to his head and Dean had a point about him being more of a liability than a help in heavy fighting. At the bardic college they were taught to avoid confrontation and to steer clear of demons whenever possible. Lots of emphasis had been placed on keeping their hands and fingers in good shape so they could continue to earn their keep.

It wasn’t too long before Dean was back and asking him to come along to see what Sam was going to do with the demons, “Come on Gabe. Sam asked me to get you. He wants to show you how he sends the demon scum back to hell.”

“You don’t just exorcise them?” Gabe had to trot to keep up with the taller man.

“Exorcising them doesn’t get rid of them permanently, it sends them back to hell, but they can generally find another host at some point. What Sam does traps them there.” There was a hint of pride in Dean’s voice.

“How do you know that?”

“Wait until you see it, then Sam can answer your questions better than I can. We’re almost there.”

They were soon standing next to Sam and a pile of four crossroads demon corpses. “So what exactly do you do?” the bard asked.

“I send them back to hell. I use my mind and I’ve been binding it to power from my arm and releasing that to send them back. Watch and then I’ll try to answer your questions.”

Sam went through his usual preparation and when he released his will the blue light flowed through the circle and over the dead demons returning them to hell. The mage was sweating when he was finished but had no headache or nosebleed.

“He had a nosebleed the first time he used that on so many at one time. That was when we first met.” Dean took the quarterstaff from Sam and let him lean against him.

“How did you know you could send them away permanently?” the bard had never heard of anything like that in his travels.

“It was an accident the first time. I was out heading to market and I nailed one small kobold. I didn’t want to leave it at the side of the road but needed to get to town and set up for the market so I wished it would return to hell. It was covered with the blue light and it descended. I tried it again the next time I ran into a demon and worked it a little more formally and tapped the energy in my arm, it was a lot easier.”

“But how do you know they’re gone for good?”

Sam sighed. He was tired. “I have no concrete evidence one way or the other it’s just something I know. I realize how crazy that sounds but I know. Can we start back to the horses?”

They made it back to the horses and Dean insisted that Sam ride while the other two walked for a while. The little bard was questioning Sam about what else he could do and was surprised to learn that the mage was able to move things, influence people and some animals as well as broadcasting his thoughts. 

“You’re far more powerful than anyone I’ve met, Sam.” The bard was impressed and wondered what else he could do that hadn’t been discovered yet.

Sam laughed, “I don’t feel very powerful right now. I feel like collapsing.”

“You expended a great deal of energy back there. I’m not surprised you’re tired. I think that you are correct in assuming the energy in your arm gives you a boost. I don’t think I’d be able to come up with that much energy. When we get back to the library I think we need to concentrate on teaching you how to block.” The bard was worried that with all the energy Sam was throwing around that someone would eventually notice and try to read him. “Once you learn to block others it will be safer for you to work with those large amounts of power.”

“Won’t someone else like you be able to tell he’s blocking and wouldn’t that confirm what they suspect?” Dean was searching both sides of the road looking for a good place to put up for the night. Sam wasn’t going to last much longer.

“Not necessarily. Some people have a natural ability to block out others even though they have no other psych talent present so just blocking wouldn’t necessarily set someone apart. What about that grove over there,” Gabe pointed to a small stand of trees about a quarter mile from the road. “It’s not as far off the road as the other places we’ve stopped but I don’t think he’s hold up much longer.”

“I’m fine,” Sam protested but knew they were right. He just didn’t like the idea of them stopping just for him.

“Good Gabe, let’s head there and we can set up camp and you and I can share watch tonight. I’ll even cook.” Dean led Sam’s horse and his own off the road toward the trees, leaving Gabe to follow with his own horse and Bert.


	28. Trust

They completed their supply run without spotting anyone else, demon or human, on the road and had been back in the library for a couple of days before Dean and Gabe decided it was time to approach Sam with the idea they’d come up with on the trip. Sam hadn’t had anything worse than what he considered a normal nightmare since the day before they’d left for Marshalltown. Gabe suggested that this would be a good time to try to reach past his defenses since they might have relaxed somewhat in the interim. They approached him one afternoon while he was charging his arm.

“Hey Sam,” Dean called out to grab his attention so they didn’t startle him. 

“Hey Dean, Gabe. What’s up?” Sam put aside the book he’d been trying to read and watched his two friends approach. It wasn’t unusual for one of them to join him outside, but both coming at one time put him slightly on edge. “Is something wrong?”

“No, nothing’s wrong,” Dean sat on the ground next to him and Gabe sat across from them. “We have something we’d like to run by you and thought this would be a good time. Besides, it’s a pretty nice day, not too hot at all for a change.”

“Sure.” The mage pulled his legs up in a slightly defensive posture but his eyes were still calm and open to any possibilities.

Dean nodded at the bard to take the lead. “No one likes to bring up tough topics but we need to discuss what happened before we left for Marshalltown. I have an idea that I’ve spoken to Dean about that may give you the means to stop those nightmares and flashbacks for good. Will you be okay with us talking about it out here?” The bard’s tone was even and friendly, he kept his face neutral and rested his arms on either knee with his expression open.

“I’ve thought about his suggestion a lot since then and I think he’s on to something. You know I’d do anything for you, Sam and I won’t hurt you. Will you please listen to him and promise to think about his idea?” Dean had taken one of Sam’s hands while he was talking and he raised it to his mouth, kissing is softly. He didn’t detect any trembling yet and Sam was still breathing easily.

“Yeah, of course I’ll listen. No one would like get past that night more than I would. I’m just not sure how much help I’ll be since I freeze up at the very thought of it.” Sam met the bard’s eyes and then shifted to look into Dean’s. Both sets of eyes were full of care and concern for his well-being. He tightened his grip on Dean’s hand.

“When I was in your head the other night I was able to see them, the men that hurt you. They were still alive in your mind even though Dean killed them. I suggested to him that perhaps if we were able to show them dead and dying to you, that the part of your mind that can’t let your ordeal go would feel safe again.” Gabe spoke quietly and kept his tone even while watching for any signs of Sam drawing into his mind and away from their conversation.

“Okay, I can kind of understand how that might help, but how will we do that?” The mage moved a little closer to his boyfriend and let him put an arm around him.

“It’s okay, Sammy I’ll be there with you too. Gabe is going to provide a bridge between us so that you can see what I saw and did. He’ll be able to show you that they’re dead and not coming back.”

Sam shut his eyes and tried to imagine what it would be like to experience first-hand the deaths that Dean had caused. Gods knew killing the hunters terrorizing the other mage they’d found had been satisfying but hadn’t really eradicated his memories.

“I’m not sure it will erase your memories completely, Sam. You’re broadcasting again.” Gabe smiled and shrugged at the mage. “The intention of this is not to erase because that can’t be done, but to give your mind the ammunition it needs to keep the memories manageable. To show that there is no longer anything to fear from those that harmed you.”

“Sam, Gabe’s sister was attacked too. She couldn’t get past her fear and her memories. Gabe has thought about this approach for much longer than just the past few weeks.” Dean was lightly massaging the back of Sam’s neck, trying to keep him relaxed.

“What happened to her?”

“Adari, her name was Adari, and she was beaten, raped and left for dead. She was a techno-mage as well. You would have liked her.” The bard stopped to choke back the tears he felt whenever he talked about his sister’s ordeal.

“Was it hunters?” Sam’s voice had hardened and his eyes had gone from brown and warm to flinty steel and cold. “Did you find them?”

“Some of her brothers and sisters found her when she and her market partner didn’t return on time. There was nothing they could do for the young man who’d accompanied her, but she was still breathing and they brought her back to the infirmary where they healed her physical injuries. They don’t know who was responsible, Sam so no, they were never found.”

“I’m sorry Gabe no one deserves what she went through. No one.”

“That includes you too, Sam. My gift was very new at the time and I had very little control over it. When I visited her shortly before her……before she killed herself, I could see the despair and hurt within her. I could feel the scars on her mind but I didn’t have any idea how to help her. In the end she did the only thing she felt would help.” The bard was crying freely now and Dean who had been prepared for tears all around handed him a square of silk.

“The point is Sam, he’s been thinking about how the mind deals with trauma and how someone with his gift could use it to help heal mental wounds. Like he said, not to take away memories, but to make them into something less powerful, less able to keep hurting.” Dean kissed the mage on the forehead before continuing. “I’ve said I’ll allow him full access to my head, my mind and let him pull out what he thinks will do the job and then, still linked to me we will walk you through my memories of the day I found you with the hope that you can weave both sets of memories together and put them to sleep for good.”

The three friends sat together in companionable silence as Sam thought through everything that had been said trying to find a hole in the logic. Looking for something the others may have overlooked. “You’ve never tried this before, how do you know it won’t make me worse?”

“You’re right, I haven’t tried it before and I can’t offer any guarantee other than that my instinct says this is the right way to help you. I honestly don’t think you will come out any worse. It will either work or it won’t but it shouldn’t damage you any further.” Gabe truly believed that he could help the young mage and felt very strongly that using his gift was the way to do so. “Kind of like how you know you’re permanently ending those demons you send to hell.”

“Sammy,” Dean shifted slightly so he could look into Sam’s eyes, “I don’t know nearly as much as the two of you, but I’ve lived by my wits and my instincts all my life and I trust him. If you don’t want to do this though, no one is going to make you. I told you before that I love you just how you are and I can live with you forever just as we are now. I’d like it if you would try, but it’s your call and I’ll back whatever you decide.” He brushed a soft kiss across his love’s mouth to seal the fact that he’d be there no matter what.

“You can think about it, Sam. There’s no need to make a decision right away. Both Dean and I will be around for a while.” Gabe got up off the ground and started walking back to the garage so that Sam and Dean could discuss it privately if they wished.

The rest of the day passed quickly and soon Dean was lying in their bed waiting for Sam to join him, hoping he’d decide to allow them to move forward with their plan. He was sincere in his wish for Sam to heal and would stay with him regardless, but he couldn’t help hoping that if they could put the nightmare images plaguing him to rest that maybe, in time, their relationship could become more physical. He was a man, he liked, no he loved sex, but he loved his mage more than anything else and was determined to put his needs before all others including his own. He groaned, he was hard, again, and wondered briefly if he had enough time to jerk off before Sam finished his shower. He took himself in hand and using a tiny bit of the oil he kept in the drawer next to their bed he began to stroke himself, twisting his hand to roll across the sensitive head and slit of his swollen cock. In his mind’s eye it was Sam’s hand that was working him. He practically felt the other man next to him, his breath on his neck and the heat of his body warming his side. He drew in a sharp, hissed breath when he felt Sam’s mouth on his neck near his ear, “Sam!”

“It’s okay Dean.” He drew the other man closer to him and turned him on his side. “I’ve got this.” 

Dean’s head fell back against Sam’s shoulder allowing him to support its weight as Sam’s hand joined his on his cock. Moving in time with his established rhythm, the mage gently moved Dean’s hand away. “I’ve got you, let me.”

The combination of the mage sucking and biting at his neck and his hand, his large hand on his cock just about did Dean in and he moaned Sam’s name again as he thrust into his hand. “You feel so good Sammy, you are……ughhhh…..so good baby boy……love you.”

Sam saw the small bottle of oil on the table and added a couple drops to his palm as he continued to stroke up and down with a couple twists and turns added for variety. He worked his other hand around Dean’s shoulder and was stroking the other side of his neck while not letting up with his mouth. The sight of Dean in his hand was almost too much to bear and he began to thrust himself against Dean’s ass and back adding his own pants, moans and cries to those of his love.

Feeling Sam’s big, hard cock at his back was all it took to push the hunter over the edge and he came harder than he had in days, working himself through his orgasm by continuing to thrust into the hand holding him. He wanted, no needed, to do the same for his Sammy and reached behind himself to give his mage a hand (pun totally intended he thought). He had gathered up some of his own come and wrapped his hand around the throbbing cock that was moving against his back, “Come for me baby boy, you can let go. I’ve got you Sammy, please come for me.”

The mage was holding back all of the images threatening to flood his mind. He closed his eyes and concentrated solely on the sound, smell and feel of the unbearably sexy man he was thrusting into and against. His mouth was still on his neck biting, licking and kissing in turn the only sound he was capable of making his love’s name, “Dean, Dean, Dean….” His orgasm, when it hit, felt like it had been born in his soul and that the come he was spurting into Dean’s hand and onto his back the very essence of himself. And while it wasn’t the first time he’d reached orgasm since his rape, it was the first time he’d sought out Dean and the tears leaking from his eyes paid tribute to his recovery, Dean’s patience and the horrors that only man was capable of perpetrating.

The hunter reached down and got his cotton underwear off the floor and wiped himself off before turning over to clean Sam’s hand and belly. He allowed the younger man to throw himself across him as he lay on his back, one hand tangled in his hair, the other holding one of his hands. “I love you so much, Sammy, so, so much.”

Sam squeezed the hand holding his and kissed the collar bone under his mouth. “I love you too Dean and I’ll do it.”

“You will? Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure, I trust you and what if this is the only thing that will help? I want to be with you Dean, I do and I can’t the way I am,” Sam’s voice was soft, almost a whisper and it carried just a hint of the deep despair he felt when he thought of spending his life being afraid to show or receive physical love.

Dean tightened his hold and kissed the top of his head. “I meant what I said earlier, Sammy. I love you - the you that I’m holding.”

“I know you do, but I don’t love me like this. I can be better than this and I’m not going to turn down the chance to try. For you, but mostly for me, I don’t want to break like Adari.” He kissed the hand in his and snuggled himself even closer.

“You would never break. You’re much stronger than you think. You’re the strongest, bravest man I know.” Dean didn’t understand how it was possible to love another person as much as he did Sam. He sent up another prayer to the unknown god the pastor in Carolton had served. Thanking him again for allowing him to have met his baby, his Sammy. He pulled their quilt up and moved his hand to Sam’s back rubbing it lightly as they both drifted off. He added one more hurried prayer, asking that the night be nightmare free and that Gabe’s solution work.


	29. Faith

A couple of days passed before Gabe felt he was ready to bridge the minds of his two friends. He prepared by questioning each of them separately and was especially gentle with Sam but felt that he needed to aware of as much as he could remember in order to minimize the possibility of something completely unexpected showing up and throwing him out of Sam’s mind. He was much more forthright with Dean and once he felt that he knew as much as he possibly could about what each man had done during the time they were apart he set a time and place for their experiment.

They gathered together after dinner in the small sitting room just off the main library. Gabe poured Sam and Dean pretty heavy shots of whiskey and made himself a cup of his headache remedy. He thought that it would be easier to bridge the two minds if they were a little blurred around the edges.  
“Drink up boys. I think I need your minds a little on the loose side for this thing to work right,” Gabe raised his mug in a toast. Sam and Dean looked at each other shrugged and threw back their double, triple?, shots in unison.

“Let’s go over the details one more time while the alcohol gets to work. I’ll ask you both to relax and close your eyes. Just breathe normally and push any non-essential thoughts out of our minds. I’ll enter Dean’s mind first and try to call up his memories from that day. We’ve talked about it recently so they shouldn’t be too far away. Once I’ve connected with them I’m going to have Dean take your hand Sam and I’ll use your connection, both the physical and the emotional, to take us both into your mind. Once we’re there I’m going to ask you to take us back to the cabin.” Sam winced at the thought. “I know it’ll be hard but we need to get behind that wall you’ve built and you’re the only one with a way in.”

“Sam if you’ve changed your mind it’s okay,” Dean was quick to reassure his mage that there was no pressure to go through with the exercise if it was too much, too soon.

“No, Dean, I’m fine. I want to do this.” He looked over at the pretty green eyes and smiled. “I really want to do this, for us.”

“Great, now we’ve established we all want to do this! Let’s move on. Once you’re back in the cabin I’ll be able to join you with Dean and he’s going to show you what was happening outside the cabin before and after you heard him arrive. We’ll skip around a little, but you’ll see each of them die and then you’ll see the hunter dumping their corpses. I’ll pull us all out at that point. There’s no sense in revisiting anything else.” The bard looked from one to the other as they let his words sink in. “Any questions? Now’s the time to ask, I don’t think I’m going to be able to stop things halfway through.” He looked at both men again giving them time to back out or to ask about any of the procedure. “All right then. Close your eyes, relax your minds and bodies. Call up your memories and hold them close to the surface. Good.”

Gabe watched both men fight against relaxing and then balk at calling up the painful memories. They both eventually settled down and were breathing together. He thought that if he listened to their chests he’d hear that their hearts were beating in unison as well. ‘Gods give me the strength to help these two,’ he thought before he sent the first fingers of thought into Dean’s mind.

_“Dean, Dean. I’m here can you hear me?”_

_“Hear you? I can see you! How do you do that? So fucking cool.”_

_“You’re actually creating what you see and Sam will do the same when we’re in his mind.”_

_“Still fucking cool. What next?”_

_“Take me there.”_

Gabe was suddenly next to Dean as he stalked the first outlaw hunter outside the cabin and slit his throat as he was pissing. They worked through the first three and then Dean was in the cabin cutting Sam down from the rafters.

_“Move on Dean, what’s next.”_

He found himself standing over the fourth hunter and heard Dean telling him he’d kill him slowly except for wanting to spare Sam the experience and the fourth man joined his friends. Dean started to head back into the cabin.

_“No, this is in your mind, he’s fine, he doesn’t need help. Show me what you did with them.”_

_“But that was later.”_

_“Time has no meaning here we don’t have to do things in order. Sam’s fine.”_

Dean looked once more at the door to the cabin, _“I….fine I collected them and the dead mage in the barn and took them here.”_

They were standing in the clearing where he’d left Balto. _“I didn’t bury them they didn’t deserve it. I felt bad that I didn’t bury the mage, but I had to get back in case Sam woke alone.”_

They were back at the cabin standing outside. _“Good Dean, good job. Now take Sam’s hand, it’s on your left. Good.”_ Dream Gabe held out his hand and Dean took that with his other hand, _“Now we’ll head into Sam’s head. Don’t react when we get there. No matter what you see remember that it’s not happening now. It’s a memory, a dream. I’ll pull him out and into our space. You have to trust me and let me do this my way.”_

_“Understood.”_

Gabe took another sip of his tea and deepened his level of concentration as he followed the shimmering cord that bound the hunter and the mage together. The next instant they were in the cabin, Sam was tied to the chair….

_“Sam! Sammy!”_

_“Dean, let me handle it. Remember it’s not happening.”_

_“I’m going to be sick.”_

_“Sam, Sam,”_ Gabe used a little more energy and pushed his thoughts a little bit harder, trying to get Sam’s attention. Sam was moaning and thrashing on the couch across from him but the hunter still had hold of his hand, _“Sam, its Gabe and I’ve got Dean with me. Dean, call him again.”_

_“Sammy? Can you hear me, baby boy?”_

_“Dean?”_

_“Yeah Sammy, it’s me.”_

_“You came for me! I can’t believe you’re here.”_

_“Remember Sam, you’re not tied down, you can walk away,”_ Gabe coached the battered mage through the process of freeing himself from the ropes. _“That’s it Sam, come toward Dean and I, they won’t hurt you here. They can’t hurt you anymore.”_

Sam staggered over to the transparent figures of Gabe and Dean and practically fell into Dean’s arms. _“You’re here, you came.”_

_“Sam. You need to listen to me very carefully. Can you do that?”_ Gabe moved to the floor next to Sam and took his other hand, _“I want to show you what Dean did before he found you. You don’t need to do anything. Just watch.”_

Gabe let the memories he’d picked up in Dean’s head flow out surrounding the three of them with the images of the Terry and his gang dying over and over again. He ended the torrent of thought at the grove where Dean had left their corpses.

_“All right you two, this is probably the trickiest part. Dean, you and I are going to leave Sam’s mind and then once you’re stable I’ll leave your mind. Everybody ready?”_

Dean broke the silence, “That was fucking cool. I need how to do that.”

“I don’t think it’s something you can learn.” Sam squeezed the hand he was still holding, “Gabe how are you feeling?”

The bard was holding his head and his nose was bleeding freely, “I feel like shit.”

“Get him some more of that tea Sam, I’ll get something for his nose,” Dean headed off down the hall to the bathroom and Sam to the kitchen.

The hunter returned first, “Here’s a damp cloth, let me help,” he wiped away the blood away and then gave Gabe a couple of dry cloths to hold to his nose, “put pressure on it. That’ll help it stop.”

“Thanks Dean. How do you feel? Headache?” Gabe wasn’t sure if Dean would suffer any of the after effects since he didn’t have any of the ability.

“I’m fine, other than wanting to kill those mother-fucking assholes again anyway.”

Sam returned with two mugs of the remedy and handed one to Gabe, “I hope you don’t mind, my head’s kind of achy too.”

“No, that’s fine.” He sipped at the still very hot tea. “Any other after effects for you?”

“Just this headache, it’s not as bad as the first one you gave me, but the tea does seem to be the only thing that works well.” Sam made a face as he sipped at his cup.

Dean poured some more whiskey in his glass and the three men sat in silence each lost in their own thoughts. “So there’s no way to tell if this helped Sam other than see if he has any more bad nightmares or flashbacks, right?”

“Give him some time to recover, Dean.”

“Just asking.”

“No, I’m sorry but there’s no way to tell until time passes without a reoccurrence of the nightmares or anxiety.” Gabe continued sipping at his tea trying to down the cup as quickly as possible. “What do you remember Sam?”

“I remember Dean killing those…..men and I saw where he left them.” Sam was also trying to finish his tea as quickly as possible so he could wash the taste away with some whiskey.

“I remember it all and it was fucking cool!” Dean didn’t think he’d ever seen anything more amazing than the mind traveling. Even the library paled in comparison.

Gabe laughed despite the pain in his head, “Listen you two, I’m going to lie down. At this point I think only a dark room is going to chase the pain away. We can debrief further tomorrow if necessary. Good night.”

“Can you make it on your own?” Sam was up and ready to help the bard down the hall.

“Yeah, I’ll make it. See you tomorrow.” The bard waved one hand over his head as he walked through the door leading to their bedroom corridor.

Sam tucked himself under Dean’s arm and snuggled into him on the couch. “It was pretty fucking cool, wasn’t it?”

“Damn straight!”

“I really hope we didn’t put him through all that for nothing. He looked pretty wrecked.” Sam looked up at the hunter and noticed for the millionth time how his freckles spread out across his cheeks.

Dean tilted Sam’s face up and caught his mouth, pressing a line of kisses across it before licking at them asking for entrance. The mage moaned in response and Dean’s tongue slipped into his mouth and started a slow and thorough exploration of mouth he’d been offered. Sam cradled Dean’s face with both hands and answered with a deeply searing kiss of his own. They were both breathless when they broke apart.

“That tea is really fucking awful.” Dean handed Sam the bottle that was next to him.


	30. Beginnings

The bard decided that it was in everybody’s best interest if he disappeared for a few days and gave his friends some privacy, so he announced at breakfast a few days later that he was planning to head to Lincoln to perform and could pick up any supplies that Marshalltown didn’t have available.  
“I can take the pony with me so it won’t be an issue to pick up anything we might need. We might as well get ourselves well provisioned and as a bard, I’m the logical choice to do the traveling. It’s what I’m used to and no one ever turns a bard away.”

“It makes sense.” Dean was helping himself to more porridge at the cooker. “You’re right, Gabe, no one questions the coming or going of a bard or a minstrel. Most places look forward to their visits since it’s one of the only ways they can get information about other places.”

Sam thought about it for a few minutes while he finished his breakfast. “I can give you a list of what we could use. How comfortable are you with bartering for goods? I know you guys usually travel light and use the coins you earn to resupply rather than worry about carrying trade goods.”

“I can barter. Maybe not as shrewdly as a techno-mage, but I do fairly well.” Gabe smiled to make sure Sam knew he wasn’t being critical. “Besides, how am I going to get better if I don’t practice.”

The hunter laughed. “Point well-made, Gabe. While you’re there would you see if anyone’s talking about a rogue mage or hunter? Sam and I had to leave one of the priories in a hurry. They weren’t too pleased with the fact that I killed those four animals to save Sam and wanted to turn me over to the guild as traitor,” Dean finished his breakfast and picked up all three bowls and walked them to the sink.

Gabe shook his head in sympathy, “That’s tough and completely unfair. I’ll definitely keep my ears open for any stories, but I’m not going to ask. Better to leave it unsaid if it’s already blown away. How did you get out of the priory?”

“Sam used his gift and a little bit of misdirection. We rode the horses pretty hard the first few days and stayed out of priory cabins.”

“Used your gift how, Sam?” Gabe knew the mage had a lot more psych ability than he did and was curious.

“As I was recovering from lung fever, I got bored and started messing around with my nurses to see if it was possible to make suggestions to someone who wasn’t expecting it. When my ability first appeared I was tested on subjects who knew I’d be trying to access their minds and plant suggestions. I wasn’t able to reach any of them but I wondered if it would be different on someone who wasn’t anticipating it. It worked.” Sam smiled at the thought of how excited Dean had been the night he offered to teach him how to read.

“Anyway, he suggested ‘don’t look here, nothing interesting going on’ and we walked right by the mage guarding my cell and out an unguarded back gate. He is amazing.” Dean smiled at his partner.

“We’ll have to tell you sometime about how he gave himself up in order to save me. He’s really the amazing one.” Sam was blushing and got up to do the dishes.

“Hey, that’s my job,” Gabe protested.

“I’ve got it this time. Go with Dean, he’ll show you what we’ve collected for trade. See what you think you could do with it in Lincoln. I’ll make a list of things we need.”

Dean took Gabe to the room they were using to store any items they didn’t think they’d need so they could sort through and see what would garner the best trades. “No nightmares so far, he’s slept through the last few nights.”

“That’s great news. We can be somewhat assured that our treatment is working. He still might get thrown back to his helpless state under extreme stress, but I think it’s positive that he’s been sleeping well ever since.” Gabe was surprised by some of the things they’d found and put aside. Some he gauged as too valuable to try to trade a small outpost. “At some point I’ll head out to one of the big cities where we can get pretty good coin for some of this. There’s no reason to think you guys can’t stay here for a few years if not longer with what you’ve got to trade.”

“Yeah, that’s what Sam thought too,” Dean pulled a small pendant on a silver chain from his pocket. “There was a jeweler/mineral shop in Lincoln. Will you see what he’ll give you for this? Then, there’s a confectioner there and I’d appreciate it if you pick up a selection of the hard candy she has and a bar of chocolate if she has any available. She did when we passed through a while ago.”

“Sam likes sweets?”

Dean blushed and looked down at his feet while mumbling his reply, “Yeah.”

“I’m happy to do so. Don’t be embarrassed. I’ve never met two people more meant for each other than the two of you. It doesn’t bother me or make me uncomfortable at all, it actually gives me hope for mankind.” The bard turned to leave the room and give the other man some privacy. “I’ll bring your sweets for your sweetheart.”

They saw Gabe off a couple of days later, Bert packed with an assortment of trade goods and a couple of extra packs for Gabe’s horse in case he was wildly successful with his bartering. Dean had a hand on the small of Sam’s back as they watched the mage become smaller and smaller before finally disappearing from sight. He’d been making a conscious effort to touch the mage as many times a day as possible, mostly non-sexual and all meant to be comforting.

“Looks like we’ve got the place to ourselves for a week or so.” Dean pulled the bigger man into his arms and kissed him lightly on the mouth.

“You know that means you’ll have to play chess with me in the evenings.” The mage pulled him tighter, put one hand on the back of his head and kissed him back.

The hunter sighed, “I suppose I could do that. He beats you pretty regularly. I think you just need to have your ego stroked a bit.” He bit at the lips moving against his and slipped his tongue past them as they opened. Both men pulled in tighter and Sam added his own tongue to the dance sliding it across Dean’s and pressing it into his mouth. The kiss was hot and left both panting once they drew apart.

“Gods I love you, Sam,” Dean whispered into the ear next to his mouth. He could feel the mage’s erection pressing into his belly as he held him. His own cock was as hard as granite and he wanted the man in his arms more than anything but he stepped back to give Sam some space.

A few nights later they were getting ready for bed and Dean stopped as he was headed to the showers. “Hey Sammy, join me?”

The mage was taken by surprise by the invitation but didn’t feel any of the dread he’d have once felt at Dean’s question. “I….um…..sure.” He grabbed his clean underwear and followed Dean into the bathroom.

“I figured this isn’t something we could do with Gabe around. I just want to touch you all over, take care of you. If you get anxious or uncomfortable, just bolt. I won’t take it personally.” Dean combed his fingers through Sam’s soft, wavy hair. “I’ll even comb your hair for you afterward.”

Sam closed his eyes and leaned into the hand caressing his scalp, the touch still pleasant, his anxiety nowhere to be seen. “That feels good Dean.”

“Good.” Dean turned away to give the mage a chance to leave if he had a change of heart and turned the handles on the shower to call the hot water and slipped out of his clothes. He was hard, he was always hard and figured Sam had to be immune to it by now. He glanced quickly at Sam and saw that he was undressing as well. He sighed in relief and grabbed his washcloth and their soap before stepping under the water. The shower experience never failed to amaze him and threw his head back and let the water slide down his body.

The mage watched Dean step into the shower and throw his head back. He was undeniably the sexiest thing he’d ever seen. Everything the hunter did he did with his whole heart, mind, body and soul, he lived his life to its fullest. This was something the mage loved and admired most about him. He slipped into the shower behind him and pulled him close so he was supporting him on his chest. “Hi. Can I help?”

Dean moaned softly and turned his head so he could kiss Sam’s neck. “Please.” He continued to kiss and bite lightly at the skin where Sam’s neck met his shoulder. “You feel good.”

Pulling the hunter’s head back, Sam bit at his lower lip and slid his tongue into the waiting mouth. He took his time with the kiss, loving the sounds he was pulling from the hunter and the way Dean was moving his back against him to try and deepen their kiss. “I’ve got this.” Sam took the cloth and soap from Dean’s hands and began to work the soap over the hard body leaning on him, slowly working his way downward and very deliberately avoiding the hard and weeping cock that stood out begging to be touched. Turning Dean around Sam then worked the soapy cloth down his back, over his ass and into the crack rubbing gently against the puckered hole.

“Gods, Sammy, fuck, baby boy.” Dean held onto the larger man as he continued to stroke down between his legs. Most of the words coming out of the hunter’s mouth were unintelligible and Sam was enjoying every minute of his pleasure.

When he took the hunter’s cock in his hand Dean batted it away growling out, “My turn,” as he took the cloth and soap from the other man. The hunter worked the soapy cloth over his mage’s smooth skin in much the same way he’d done for him and he made note of the areas that seemed to be extra sensitive with plans to explore those further at another time.

Sam braced himself against the shower walls as Dean worked the soft, slippery cloth over him, moaning and sighing with pleasure as the hunter worked his way down his body. Like he’d done he avoided his cock and chased his hands away the couple of times he’d tried to take himself in hand.

“Mine Sammy, all mine,” Dean groaned out, his own cock twitching with a need to be touched, kissed, rubbed, anything. He very carefully avoided touching Sam’s perineal area not wanting to trigger a negative response while things were going so well. He pulled Sam’s head down and worked the soap through his hair, scratching at his scalp; Sam fidgeted and made happy sounds while trying to get close enough to rub his own cock against him desperate for some relief. “Told you baby boy, it’s all mine.” 

Dean fell to his knees as Sam rinsed the soap from his hair and took the base of the engorged cock in his hand and lowered his mouth to cover the rest sucking lightly as he pulled off to lick at the slit. He looked up at his love whose eyes were closed as he braced himself against the tile, his hips thrusting toward him looking for more. The hunter wasted no time and soon had his baby’s cock back in his mouth working him deeper and deeper into his mouth and throat while tonguing at the monster on the way in and sucking at it on the way out.

“Dean…..uuuugggghhh….gods Dean……that’s so……” Sam looked down and the sight of his love on his knees, his mouth stretched around him as he sucked. “So fucking beautiful.” He rested one hand against Dean’s head no longer able to control the urge to thrust into the mouth that was wrapped around him.

The hunter relaxed his throat as Sam started to thrust and moved one hand to his ass to encourage him without having to pull off his cock. His other hand was working his own cock which was almost sore it was so hard. Once they’d established a rhythm Dean moved a hand back to the base of Sam’s cock and tightened his hold enough to hold off the younger man’s orgasm. He wanted them to come together and needed just a little longer to get himself there.

Sam uttered a groan of frustration when Dean clamped his hand at the base of his cock to keep him from coming too soon. “Fuck Dean, I need……I need to…..please Dean…..I need to come.” He saw Dean smile around the cock he was sucking on and sighed out a deep breath before starting to plead again, “Dean, fuck, I’m so close, please Dean, please let me…..gods I need….”

Finally close enough himself the hunter relaxed his hold and increased the suction on the cock in his mouth and while thrusting twice more into his own hand before coming himself. Sam followed him a couple of seconds later, chasing his orgasm from the base of his spine and out into his mate’s throat with a cry of pleasure, thrusting gently as the hunter nursed them both through their combined release.

“Gods Dean,” Sam sighed as he helped him to his feet. Disappointed to see he’d taken care of himself, “I would have……”

“I know baby, I know but I wanted to come with you and I wasn’t really thinking clearly. I just wanted.” The hunter pressed his lips over Sam’s and kissed him deeply while holding the wet bodies tightly together. “Wanted you.”

Sam turned the water off and reached for the cloths they’d found that seemed tailor made for drying off and handed one to Dean. “Gonna have to let me try at some point or we’ll never know.”

“I know, Sammy, I do. I just, I can’t hurt you.” Dean dried himself quickly and put on his clean underthings. “I love you too much, baby boy. Come on, I promised I’d comb your hair for you, let’s go to our room.”

The hunter combed Sam’s hair until it was almost dry. He loved the smell of his clean hair combined with the scent of the soap they used and the naturally sweet smell that was just pure Sam. He knew he couldn’t baby him along forever and have him be content but he never again wanted to see his love as scared and broken as he was when he found him. He was terrified that he’d be the one to push the fear back into the forefront of his mind and he knew he’d never forgive himself if that happened. 

Dean had been thinking about how to give Sam back some control this since they’d done the mind-walking with Gabe and he thought he may have found a solution that they could both live with and that didn’t diminish the mage in any way. Once they were settled into bed with Sam draped over him like a living blanket he decided to broach his idea while they were still drowsy and loose from orgasm. It was as relaxed as he could get and he figured it was the same for his baby.

“Sammy?”

“Dean.”

“Remember you told me that you wished you’d given me your virginity?”

“Yeah, of course,” Sam moved to his side so he could look at Dean while they talked, “I’ll never forget it and I still wish I had.”

“I was thinking,” Dean turned to his side as well so that they were facing each other on the bed. “I was thinking……” he sighed, “This is harder than I thought. Anyway, I was thinking that while you’re not technically a virgin any more, I technically am.”

The mage took a minute to run the words through his mind a couple of times. “What? Do you mean…..?”

“I mean, I’ve been with other guys, but I’m always top. I’ve never, bottomed, never been penetrated.” Dean blushed as he admitted this, completely unsure how Sam would respond and knew if he’d misjudged and brought this up too soon that it could possibly set the younger man back. “I don’t know how you feel about it but…..”

“Wait, are you…..? Do you want me to……”

“Yeah, I’m offering you my virginity and yes I want you to fuck me but only, and I mean this Sammy, only if it’s something you’d be comfortable with. I just thought…..I suck at relationships Sam, but I love you and want to be your forever and I thought……” Dean licked his dry lips and took a deep breath, “I thought that since your first time was, I can’t even say it. I want the first time to be special for you, to have meaning beyond sexual release because I think it’s important to you and that makes it important to me too.”

“Gods, Dean, I…. I’ve…. wow, I don’t even know what to say.”

“It’s okay Sam if you can’t, if you don’t want to, I’d understand.” Dean pulled Sam close and wrapped his arms around him letting him know with both his body as well as his words that he accepted him no matter what.

“No, Dean, it’s not that, I’m…. it’s overwhelming. I’m so touched.” Sam turned his head into Dean’s neck and kissed him. “I’ve never…. never… thought….”

“That I’d let you top?” Dean laughed, “I would never let anyone else, but I want to be with you, I want that closeness. I know I’m not explaining it well. I don’t have words like you do. Just know that it, well it means something Sam and I want to give you everything, all of myself. You don’t have to make a decision right away, take all the time you need, ask me whatever comes to mind. Hell, ask Gabe if you need to, I don’t mind. Just promise you’ll think about it, for me.”

“Of course I’ll think about it! Gods Dean, that’s… it’s so, I may cry like a giant girl. It’s so generous and I’m so touched. I do have to think about it, I don’t want to fall apart on you. If, no when it happens, I want to be sure I’ll be all right.”

“I know, my love, I know and really take your time because I’m not going anywhere.” Dean kissed Sam again, taking his mouth gently but taking his time to touch every part of his mouth with his tongue inside and his lips outside, leaving Sam breathless when he broke away. “I’m here for you forever, Sam.”

“I love you so much Dean. I’m not sure what I did to get so lucky, but I’m not going anywhere either and I will think about this and once I’m sure I can be there for you, I’ll let you know,” Sam hesitated before adding, “You do know you’ll have to teach me what to do, right?”

“Consider it an exchange for teaching me how to read.”

Both men wore smiles as they settled themselves back into what they considered their sleeping positions and then exchanged ‘I love you’s’ for some time before they drifted off into sleep.

Gabe had done well in Lincoln and brought back everything on Sam’s list plus a few things that he thought they could use. Lincoln was larger than Marshalltown and he’d done well playing at the inn. As such he was able to bring back some fresh meat, something that was as rare and costly as the chocolate Dean had been hoping he’d find outside of the settled areas. They needed to cook the chickens Gabe brought right away since they had no place to keep them so Sam decided he’d make one of his favorite meals from the priory, chicken and dumplings, for dinner that night.

Dean helped unpack and put away the other supplies he brought while Sam got busy killing, plucking and gutting the chickens. He wished he could have kept one for eggs, but it was hard enough keeping their horses in fodder and the garage was hardly an ideal stable for them. He’d have no place for the chickens to roost and they’d starve without the ability to roam the area around the garage for food. He silently promised each chicken that he’d make the best meal he could to honor the lives they were giving up.

The bard was able to give Dean the sweets he’d gotten for him along with a few extra coins he had leftover, “She only had that one bar of chocolate, it’s her last. She doesn’t know when, if ever she’ll get more. It’s becoming harder and harder to find. She remembered you and your ‘brother’.” Gabe saw concern in the hunter’s face and added, “She remembered you bought the other bar of chocolate she had left. I didn’t mention you.”

“Thank you so much, he’ll be so surprised.”

“Speaking of your brother, how are things going? Any dreams while I was gone?” Gabe really hoped he’d been able to help Sam get his traumatic stress under control. It was a hard way to live.

“He’s doing really well. If he’s had nightmares they’ve been mild and they haven’t woken him up at all. To be honest, I don’t ask him about it, I figure he’d tell me if they were bothering him, but maybe I should have been checking.” Dean felt a spike of panic at the thought that maybe Sam was just shielding him and the dreams hadn’t gone away after all.

“I’m sure he would tell you, Dean. He knows you worry about him and knows you care. I don’t think he could hide if from you if he was still suffering, you’d see it.” The bard finished putting the last few items away. “I’ve missed this place. The on call water spoils a man. I’m going to clean up and I’ll join you guys shortly.”

Dean laughed. He knew what the bard meant; it would hard for him to go back to sharing a wash and waste bucket again after living in the library complex. After putting the sweets away in their room he joined Sam in the kitchen, “Anything I can help with?” He turned back the sleeves on his shirt ready to pitch in.

“You could pluck that last chicken.” Sam watched the expression of revulsion pass through Dean’s eyes.

“Yeah, well, um….”

“You were going to kill a goat for me; you can’t pluck an already dead chicken?” Sam was smiling at the other man’s discomfort.

“Yeah, sure, I’ll do it,” Dean sat at the table, ground his teeth and started pulling feathers off the still warm bird. 

Sam rinsed his own hands, still smiling and went to the hunter running the back of one hand down the side of his face, “I’ve got this. You go ahead and chop up those vegetables. I love that you would do it for me but you don’t have to.” He dropped a kiss on the top of Dean’s head and took the chicken from him.

“I don’t know whether or not that means I’m a big girl, but thank you, you’ve spared us all from eating feathers.” Dean washed his hands twice and got started on the vegetables. “Gabe asked me how you were doing since we did the mind walking thing. I told him you hadn’t had any nightmares, I was right, right?”

“Yes you’re right. Gods, Dean. I’d tell you if I was still having any kind of nightmares. I’ve not even been dreaming, honestly.”

“Good, wait, not good that you’re not dreaming, good that you’d tell me if you were still having those nightmares.” Dean watched the other man closely, looking for any sign that he’d been holding something back.

“I think you’d know, I usually wake you up when I get trapped back in that place. If I’m dreaming at all, I’m not remembering them which I think is normal.”

“He’s right Dean, it’s perfectly normal to not remember dreaming. Everyone dreams and most people never remember them.” Gabe strolled into the kitchen and took a seat at the table. “Here give me some of those, I can help cut them up.” He took half the remaining vegetables from Dean. “So what are you making, Sam?”

“Chicken and dumplings, we used to have it for special occasions at the priory. The special occasion was usually that one of the hens stopped laying but sometimes the cook would make it for birthdays. It’s a chicken stew. The dumplings are thick pieces of dough that cook with the chicken. I can’t really explain it any better. I think you guys will like it. We’ll have to eat it for the next couple of days or it will go bad so I hope you like it.”

“I’m sure we will Sam, you’re the best cook we have. Neither Dean or I plan to piss you off anytime soon,” Gabe laughed. “So what’s that box, the one humming?”

“We don’t know.” Dean looked over at the box and shrugged. “We figure whatever’s in there is pretty angry and we haven’t tried to open it.”

“Really?” Gabe got up and went to the humming white box and put a hand on either side.

“Can you tell if there’s something living in there?” Dean asked, genuinely curious. It would be pretty fucking cool if Gabe could just sense other living things.

“No, I can’t. Sam would be better at that since he can send thoughts, I can just see them. Let’s open it.” Gabe put a hand on the box’s handle.

“No! Wait!” Dean jumped to his feet, “Let me go get Honor and Courage, just in case. Sam can use that fucking big knife he’s been cutting up the chickens with. I’ll be right back.”

“He’s not scared,” Sam commented dryly causing Gabe to choke back his laughter.

Dean reappeared with his blades drawn.

“You drew them? You know you have to blood them now.” Sam was surprised, the hunter was very careful to never draw the blades unless they were in combat.

“I know, I just want to be prepared.”

Gabe choked back another laugh and covered it with a cough. “All right, are you both ready? On three. One, two, three.” Gabe pulled the door open and Dean braced for something to fly out at him, Sam stood to one side.

“So, it’s nothing,” was Gabe’s observation. “There’s nothing in there. What the hell? What is this thing?”

Dean was disappointed that he couldn’t save everyone from some awful demon or angry animal and casually went to where the chickens were being butchered and ran both blades through the blood.

Sam and Gabe were both in front of the open box, which contained shelves, but nothing else, “So it’s a cabinet?” Sam suggested.

Gabe reached into the box and touched one of the metal shelves. “It’s cold. Touch it.”

Sam reached in and put his hand on each of the shelves in turn, “It is cold. That’s odd. I wonder why?”

“So what’s with the box?” Dean was across the room, cleaning off his blades.

“You saw, there’s nothing but it’s cold inside,” replied Gabe. 

Sam was deep in thought, “What if it’s cold storage? You know like an ice house or a root cellar. A place you can put things to keep them fresh longer.”

“They’ve got something that gets hot,” Dean gestured to the cooker, “Why not something that gets cold. Makes sense in a weird way.”

“It does make sense,” Gabe added. “They’d need to have a way to keep food out here. I don’t think this has ever been in the middle of anything important and there aren’t any ruins nearby so whoever lived here would have to do supply runs like we are.”

“We could test it,” Dean offered. “We could put a dish of the chicken dumplings in there and see what happens. If it keeps longer inside the box then we can use it for that even if that wasn’t its original purpose, right?”

“Of course we can, we do whatever we want. The place is yours.” Gabe said to Dean.

“How do you figure it’s mine?”

“You’re the only one who it opens for, right? Logically someone meant for you to get in here so you’re the owner. Simple.”

The excitement of the cold box died down and everyone got back to work on their dinner. Once it was cooking Sam chased the other two out of the kitchen so he could work in peace and quiet. He wanted to make dessert and liked to surprise the others when he did. He was pretty sure they knew what he was doing but living underground with only two others for company you kind of had to make your fun where you found it.

After dinner Gabe shooed the other two out of the kitchen so he could clean up. He promised he’d bring tea and the apple cake Sam made out to them once he was done. He had a proposal for them and he was admittedly sucking up a bit, hoping they’d keep an open mind.

“So what do you think he’s up to?” Dean sipped at the whiskey in his glass and turned to look at his mage….his, he loved that.

“Why do you think he’s up to something? He’s being nice because he’s been away.” Sam was curled into Dean’s side on the couch sipping from his own glass.

“Really, Sam?” Dean rolled his eyes, “I’m not saying it’s anything bad, but he’s got something up his sleeve.”

Sam laughed at the expression on Dean’s face, he made the best faces. “Yeah, okay, you may be right, but it could just be he missed us.”

Dean was spared from replying when Gabe entered the room, tray with tea and dessert in hand. He passed out the dishes and settled into what had become ‘his’ chair.

“Where did you find the tray?” Sam asked, he hadn’t seen it in the kitchen and he was sure he’d looked at everything in there.

“It was on the dresser in one of the bedrooms, I just relocated it to the kitchen. I figured it might be more useful there. This cake is excellent, Sam. Dinner was excellent, thank you very much.”

“Thank you for the chickens. Even if we’re all sick of them by the time we’re finished with the chicken and dumplings it was really nice to have fresh meat,” Sam smiled and nodded at the little bard.

“So guys, I had a lot of time to think on the way to and from Lincoln and I’ve got an idea to run by you.” Gabe took another bite of his cake and Dean smirked at Sam. “I was thinking that having a mage paired with a hunter would be a much more effective utilization of the talents being developed by both the priories and the guild than sending each out alone. I know the system now relies a great deal on keeping secrets from each other and from the general population. The bardic college does too. We’ve got books you mages have never seen,” he stopped to allow a gasp of outrage from the mage, “and we study a kind of martial art that teaches us to be skilled at hand to hand combat. It’s supposed to be secret, that’s why I didn’t say anything on the road.

“There’s a lot of secrecy and as I rode I tried to think about what and who would benefit from the secrets and the strict segregation of the different disciplines and I couldn’t come up with a good answer. So I challenged myself to design a more cooperative system of education that could possibly reach a greater number of people.” 

The mage and the hunter looked at each other and then back at the bard, “You mean like teaching the hunters to read?” Sam asked.

“Or teaching the mages how to recognize and track demon kind?” was Dean’s question.

“For a start, yes, why are mages and bards the only ones who read? Well, with the exception of some clerics of course. I know there’s a scarcity of reading material but couldn’t everyone have the rudiments so that if they ran across something written they’d know what they were dealing with?”

“Gabe you know that every other hunter out there would have my head before I could even greet him. Dean was dying and decided to let me help him rather than bleed to death. He’s told me if our positions had been reversed he’d have beheaded me in an instant.”

“I’m sorry to say that he’s right, I would have done it. I wouldn’t have hesitated.” Dean pulled Sam a little closer and kissed the top of his head. “I’d never have known what I’d have missed out on.”

“It’s due to a couple centuries of lies and prejudice spread by the leaders of the various communities,” Gabe continued. “I think that it was originally a way to preserve a way of life that would have been lost without communities dedicated to keeping the skills alive, however like many things that original purpose has been lost.”

The three men sat in companionable silence as they each thought about the separate systems that dictated their beliefs as well as what they studied and how they behaved in public. “I’ve told Sam that I thought the techno-mages and priories were doing themselves a disservice by keeping themselves so isolated. I’ve been inside a couple of the priories now and they are nothing like what is passed around as the truth.   
I also think that the hunter’s guild seems to have lost all control of their membership. Take what happened to your sister and to Sam. That is not how I was taught a hunter behaves. Any of those animals would lose all rights to call themselves hunter if I were in charge. There have always been stories of wayward hunters and I dismissed them as bitterness and jealousy but maybe I was wrong to disbelieve. I’m actually ashamed to be associated with the guild right now considering what’s gone unpunished.”

“As I said, the bardic college is no better. They’ve got secrets and rituals that are supposed to keep us safe from demons while we’re on the road. So, I’ve thought if these rituals work, why haven’t they been shared with the hunters and mages at the very least, since the members in each of your organizations travel the blasted lands like the bards.”

“You’re right, Gabe. Someone is benefiting and it’s not the brethren, hunters, bards or common folk. What’s your proposal?” Sam had a pretty good idea of where the conversation was headed but wanted to hear the bard’s outline.

“I’ll get everyone some more cake.” Dean got up and picked up their plates to take to the kitchen.

“At least he shares,” was the bard’s only comment.

“Depends on what it is,” was the mage’s response. “Go ahead, he’ll catch up.”

“So, what if there was a way to get others here - Bards, mages and hunters. As well as anyone interested in learning one of the disciplines but unable to make it to a priory or college….”

“Or find a hunter to take them as apprentice,” Dean handed out their plates as he spoke. “There are plenty of young people who’d like to learn to be hunters but can’t find mentors.”

“It would have to be a small number at first since there’s just the three of us,” Gabe stopped to chew and swallow, “but the idea would be to cross train them. Why can’t someone know it all? What is the purpose in keeping us so separate? Is someone afraid we’d become too knowledgeable, too powerful? If so, who and why?”

“Okay, what if we do open the library to students and cross train them, how do we know they’ll be accepted and not hunted like the mages are today?”

“I think the mages would have the easiest time blending in, they wear no marks unless they’re cyborg like you are Sam, but these are things that could be worked out as we move along and I’m serious about pairing the students. The hope being that the pairing would continue as they graduate and move out to serve the communities.”

“It’s a big undertaking and it won’t be popular. How will we attract candidates?” Sam was still trying to figure out the logistics.

“That’s where the bards will play their most important role. Who is accepted everywhere? Who has access to every town and city across the land? I write a couple of songs that are thinly veiled recruitment invitations and sing them everywhere I go. Not everyone will be able to unravel the riddle in the song, but those that do would be the ones we’d be interested in.”

“We’d have to have anyone coming here put under oath, either on the blades or by something even more binding. We can’t have this location become well known, especially if you’re right and working together will piss off the local and perhaps even broader leadership of the three disciplines.” Dean began to think of ways that they could tighten the security around the library complex.

“As I said, there are a lot of details that will need to be worked out if we decide to do this and it will be a lot of work and a lot of risk. Take time to think about it. I can’t help but feel that we were drawn together for a greater purpose, our circumstances are too similar and our skill sets too complimentary for this to have been purely chance.”

“I don’t have to think about it. I’ve told Sam more than once that our meeting like we did wasn’t just chance. There are so many ways that we could have gone sideways instead of falling for each other to dismiss it all as coincidence. I’m in.” Dean looked at his partner. He knew that of the three of them the cyborg mage risked the most. “I’ll keep you safe Sammy.”

“It sounds almost too good to be true, but I’d be willing to explore the possibilities, study the risks and rough out a plan of some sort. I do think that we need a better idea of what’s going on outside this general area. Is there any kind of system the bards use to exchange information? Like a general meeting or something? Somewhere you could go and check the pulse of the rest of the nation?”

“There is actually. Not everyone attends, but there are two convocations every year and every bard within a week’s ride of the location tries to be in attendance. We exchange news, songs, trade instruments and get updates from our leadership. The date and site of the next one is announced at the end of the convocation. There is one in two months about two week’s ride from here. I’ll plan to be there. In the meantime I’ll work on my recruiting pieces. It’s been a long day for me, I’m headed to bed. We can talk about this again over the next few days. I just really wanted to gauge your interest tonight. Thanks again for dinner Sam. Next time we have chickens I’d like to learn how you did it.”

“I’d be happy to teach you Gabe. Good night and sleep well.”

“Big day, huh? Cold box, chickens and quite possibly treason, ready for bed?” Dean picked up their dishes and took them to the kitchen. He left them in the sink, Gabe could wash them in the morning, he thought and he headed back to get his baby.

“Did you wash the dishes or leave them?”

Dean smirked, “He likes to play with the water. I’m just indulging him.” He held a hand out to Sam and helped him up. “Besides, I’ve been doing dishes since he left.”

“Do you really think this could work?”

“I think it’s worth exploring. There are a lot of pieces that have to be laid out and a lot of uncertainty. I think we’d regret it if we didn’t make an effort to see if it was workable,” Sam put his arm around Dean as they walked to their room.

“That’s how I feel too. If we don’t like the answers we get we leave things as is, but there is something awfully tempting about the idea.”

“Agreed.”


	31. Epilogue

The next couple of months flew by. They decided that the first thing they needed to do was find out more about how their three orders came into being. With all the books at their disposal they were hopeful that they might find books that dealt more with the facts and less with the dogma they’d learned first-hand. Each man searched the library for texts that dealt with the founding of their respective orders. Sam had given Dean a list of words to look for so that he could search as well.

They found the most books on the bardic traditions and Gabe had the monumental task of sorting through books with references to the bards of the dark and middle ages in order to narrow his selections to books from the time surrounding the demon wars. Dean was also able to find a number of books that referenced hunters and hunting. These were primarily from the time immediately before the demon wars but he also found a few more recent references which told them that someone else had been using the library since the apocalypse.

Sam found nothing at all that directly referenced the techno-mages but was able to find books that would have made any priory green with envy. There were a number of books on nanotechnology, psychic phenomena, medicine, and lots and lots of books that gave different histories of the rise of the demons and fall of civilization. They definitely had their work cut out for them.

They decided that they’d open the library complex to six students, three mages and three hunters for their inaugural class. Keeping the numbers down at first would provide a layer of protection for everyone involved with the project and they had enough of the twin blades to outfit every hunter once they graduated. Gabe was going to cautiously test the waters at the upcoming convocation to see if there were other bards who were dissatisfied with the way things were and would be willing to join a network of informants or join them at the library. The information network would keep those confined to the library up to date on the status quo in the villages, cities and towns across the nation as well as send mages or hunters in trouble their way.

It all looked good on paper and Sam and Dean had a lot of work ahead of them while Gabe was off gathering information on the way to and from the convocation as well as at the bardic gathering itself. Gabe took their pony with him and planned to gather specialty items while he was gone as well. The library was well stocked and they could always head to Marshalltown if they were in desperate need of something before Gabe returned.

One night shortly after Gabe had left them, Dean was working his way through another new book, this one on were-beasts and it was slow going. He actually felt like playing chess would be more fun, but was committed to making an effort to contribute to their enterprise so was doing his best to keep his mind on the page in front of him and not on the way the light was reflecting off of Sam’s hair. ‘Okay, he thought, maybe I’m not studying that hard after all, but who could with Sam around.’

Sam looked up and met Dean’s eyes, “What were you thinking just now?”

“Nothing, just resting my eyes, the print is really small in this book.” It wasn’t, but whatever, he thought.

“And here I was hoping you were thinking about me. I guess I need to try a little harder to capture your attention.” Sam slipped out of the lightweight shirt he was wearing causing Dean to swallow a small yelp of surprise. “It’s hot in here tonight, don’t you think?”

‘Fuck me,’ Dean thought, ‘I’ll never get another word read, I swear he’s gonna kill me.’ 

“Are you all right? You’re not coming down with something are you?” Sam rose and walked around the table to put a hand on Dean’s forehead. “No, not feverish.” Sam dropped down so his mouth was at Dean’s ear, “Remember what you asked me to think about a while ago, when Gabe was gone the last time?”

Dean didn’t have to think about it at all, he remembered. “Of course.”

“I want to. If you still do, I want to.” Sam was nipping at the ear he was speaking into and it made Dean shiver.

“Really? Gods, Sammy.” Dean stood and pulled Sam into a full body hug. “Of course I want to, are you sure, baby?”

“I am. I’m sure. I can’t stop thinking about it, about you. It’s been driving me crazy, I can’t read three words and you’re back in my mind. I haven’t had a nightmare since the mind walking and I want you.” Sam had worried that he’d taken too long to make up his mind. He knew Dean had said he could take forever, but he hoped he hadn’t been disappointed when the days had stretched to weeks.

“I love you, Sam, more every day.” Dean pulled Sam into a kiss that was sweet and yet soul searing at the same time. “Let’s go.”

Dean stopped at the cabinet with the candles and collected an armful before he followed Sam to their room. Once there he placed the candles and set them alight before turning out the overhead light.

“You never cease to amaze me.” Sam slipped his hands under Dean’s shirt and worked it off over his head. “You’re a romantic at heart, aren’t you?” Sam kissed his way down one side of Dean’s neck and up the other.

“Just with you Sam, you’re the only one who’s ever counted.” He answered Sam’s kisses with some of his own which alternated with nips and licks until Sam was breathing hard. “There’s no one else I’ve wanted to make feel special.” He untied Sam’s pants and pushed them off along with his underwear. His cock was hard, curved slightly and beautiful. He couldn’t wait to feel it inside him and was surprised at his own thoughts. 

Sam sat on the edge of the bed and worked the ties on Dean’s pants, stopping long enough as he pushed them down to lick the end of his cock to taste the pearl of pre-come that was suspended at his slit. 

Dean moaned in pleasure. “Gods Sammy, you’re going to kill me.”

The mage laughed, his voice husky, “Remember, I’m the student.” He crawled into their bed and held his hand out in invitation.

Dean took the small bottle of oil out of his drawer and set it on the bedside table before taking Sam’s hand and lying next to him. He captured the younger man’s mouth and slipped his tongue in, sweeping it across Sam’s tongue and twinning around it before sucking it back into his own. 

Sam pushed Dean onto his back and took control of their kiss, moving his tongue in and out and biting at the bottom lip that was perpetually driving him nuts. He stopped long enough to look into the deep green eyes before moving down to cover his neck and collar bone with bites that were then soothed with kitten licks and kisses.

The hunter was thrusting up against the younger man desperate for some friction against his hard and weeping cock. “Sammy, put some of the oil on your hand and push your first finger into me, you’ll need to work at it but I’ll do my best to relax and let you in. Once you’re able to move pretty freely add another and then again with three. Once I’m loosened up enough, you’ll know, then oil your cock and do the same thing. It will be difficult at first, just like with your fingers, but I’ll loosen up. Go on baby, I’m ready.”

Sam was a little scared, he remembered how badly he’d been hurt but realized that it didn’t have to be that way, he just didn’t want to screw up and hurt Dean. He oiled his fingers and carefully slid them across the puckered hole behind Dean’s cock and balls. The hunter moaned at the first contact, but Sam could tell it wasn’t pain and kept circling his opening before gently easing his first finger in to the first knuckle. He felt Dean contract his muscles against the intrusion.

“It’s okay, baby, I’m fine. You can keep going.”

While kissing Dean’s neck Sam applied a little more pressure and pushed his finger past the tight rim of muscle and into Dean’s ass all the way. He was anxious, it had hurt when Terry had done the same thing to him and so he waited to make sure Dean was still all right.

“Good Sammy, you’re so good. Just move it around and work it in and out a bit. I’m fine and you feel so good.”

Moving his finger cautiously at first Sam made small circular movements and gently moved his finger in and out. He looked down and watched as his finger sunk into Dean’s ass and almost came just from the sight, so he started to move in and out more quickly and with a little more force.

“Another one Sam, add the next one,” Dean was panting, he’d first had to work to not push against Sam’s finger but once he was in it felt good and he wanted more.

Sam worked his second finger in giving Dean a little time to get used to the additional width before moving around and pushing his fingers in as far as they could go. The sight of them moving in and out was one of the hottest things he’d ever seen and he felt like he could watch all night. He knew when he hit what Dean had called the sweet spot, it felt different but it was mostly the look on Dean’s face that gave him all the proof he needed that it existed.

“Gods Sammy, fuck, that’s so good baby boy, don’t stop please don’t stop.” 

Dean was now fucking himself back against his hand and he figured he could add his third finger so he eased it in, it was even easier this time. He was soon moving all three in and out and reaching deep inside to rub against the bundle of nerves that made up the sweet spot. He hoped he could figure it out once his cock was inside. He almost came again just thinking about replacing his fingers with his cock and figured he’d better get to it or he would come before he had a chance to figure the rest out.

“Dean, I’m going to take my fingers away.” He was kissing and sucking on the spot just behind and below Dean’s ear, a spot that was particularly sensitive. “Are you doing okay?”

“Yeah, baby I’m great, you’re perfect. I’m ready baby boy.”

Hearing the lust in Dean’s voice made the nerves in Sam’s gut clench and he so wasn’t going to last very long at all. He oiled himself up, probably using more than necessary, but he was big and he really didn’t want to hurt his love. When he was ready he pressed the head of his cock against Dean’s opening which was slightly puffy and soft and pushed in, working himself past the tight muscles and stopping to let Dean get used to his width. He reached between them and put his hand around the hard and wet cock that had been thrusting into his belly and stroked it while he pushed himself further into Dean’s open ass.

“That’s it Sammy, yes, fuck, you feel so good baby boy, don’t stop, I’m good, keep going baby, fuck me Sammy, please fuck me.” Dean was thrashing underneath his boyfriend trying to get more of him inside. He finally grabbed Sam’s hips and pulled him all the way in.

“Gods Dean, fuck,” Sam grabbed the base of his cock and held on tightly to delay his orgasm as he continued to work Dean’s cock between them.

“Come on Sam, fuck me, please.”

Sam couldn’t hold back any longer and began to thrust himself into Dean moving faster and driving deeper with each thrust. He’d never felt anything so good. Dean was hot, tight and soft, like silk or velvet and he gripped every inch of his cock.

“That’s it baby boy, you feel so good, yes Sam! Right there, gods baby, don’t stop,” the words spilling from Dean’s mouth were soon blurred together and he lost all sense of where he was and only knew one thing, Sam, his baby was fucking him and it felt like heaven. “Sammy….fuck….fuck….baby, I’m gonna come…..” and he did, spurting hard enough to hit Sam’s chin and fill his hand while coating their bellies.

When Dean’s muscles clamped down on him, Sam was able to thrust inside one more time before he came as well filling Dean’s ass. A small amount leaked out as he thrust gently once more to work through the last of his orgasm. He eased his still semi-hard cock out of Dean’s ass and rolled onto his side pulling Dean with him so they were side by side.

“You are amazing Sam, I may never let you bottom.” Dean trailed a line of open mouth kisses from Sam’s forehead, down his nose, to his mouth. “That was so…. you were so good baby.”

Sam was running his one hand through Dean’s hair, the other one he used to pull a square of silk off the night table and wiped them clean, “No Dean, you are amazing. I love you so much. I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

“No, not at all Sammy, you were perfect. You opened me just right…..I wanted you so badly,” Dean ran his hand down the beautiful cybernetic arm that held him and had opened him. “I was ready and you felt so good.”

“Good, I was scared.”

“I couldn’t tell. You will let me know if you have nightmares tonight won’t you?”

“Yes, I’ll tell you, but I won’t.”

Sam adjusted them so he was lying with his arm across Dean with as much of himself as possible touching him. Their breathing had returned to normal and Dean was rubbing his back. Maybe this was heaven and if so, he was okay with it.

“Dean?”

“Sammy.”

“If one day I want you to do that to me; to you know, fuck me. Will you?”

“Yes, baby boy, of course I will.”

“Good. I love you.”

“Love you too, Sammy.”

The End.


End file.
